Offical Sunday Sampler list for 5/17/20

[drive-by]

Perception
by Michael Pendragon

How strange this wide-flung, waking world
Whereon we sojourn but an hour,
An endless tapestry unfurled
Before us by some higher power.

A leaf that flutters in the breeze
From trees that spread grand canopies
Beneath the dragon-clouded sky.
The Autumn chill, the April rain
The winds that sweep across the plain
The locomotive's hoboed cry
That cuts the brick and mortared range
Of towers arching toward the sun.
The hush of night when day is done...
How strange, how very strange.

Life ofttimes seems a shadowplay
Spilled forth from pools of liquid light,
How does one tell a dream by day
From those he dreams at night?
How does one gauge when life began
Or where our dayfly journey ends
Or parse the patchwork fool called Man
Whose motley, pasteboard world depends
On ropes and pulleys worked by unseen hands?

And when the final curtain falls
And silence supersedes applause
We shuffle off the darkened stage,
And as our lines fade from the page
We wonder if the playwright understands.

**********

The Eyes of Age
by Michael Pendragon

When I was young, I marveled at the sky
Rolled in the fragrant grass with wanton glee
Drew faces on the clouds that sauntered by
Caught wood nymphs peeking out of every tree
Delighted in the songs of Summer wrens
That filled the day with symphonies of joy,
The solitude of sultry Summer glens
Where black-eyed Susans watched a sun-browned boy
Enchanted by the beauty of the scene.

And every day new wonders would unfold
As Earth unrolled her tapestries of green.
In Harvestime, I watched them turn to gold
Or blaze with hearthfire's scarlet-orange flame.

Then Old Man Winter spread his robes of white
And snowflake pixies bade me join their game
While goosedown blankets welcomed me each night.

Then Spring arrived with crocus-scented mirth
And Easter buds pinks as the morning skies;
I didn't stop to think what life was worth
Or count the sparkles in my mother's eyes.

But staggered years bore heavy on my back
And worry wore my sun-blanched hair to gray,
I watch the world and wonder what I lack
And how I let life's mystery slip away.

**********

Morning Perceptions
by Will Dockery

To awaken on the morning of the journey
cross out the front lawn
to the pass.

It was a crisp blue Spring morning in Atlanta
the sky was a rich cobalt color
the skyline
seemed melancholy and sparse.

Morning perceptions
of the
mother of the hill.

The hot dog skate land pizza pie with cheese
and all the wide-eyed people
in the park.

We sat on the concrete slabs
of an abandoned highway
overlooking the sewage dunes.

There was a balmy wind
cutting from the South.

The horns were instantaneous and gone
gone as quickly
merged in with the other city sounds.

An impossible group of cars roared by
they left me disturbed.

So let them all just vanish in the night
take their bright showmanship
and egg rolls, too.

Break it up soon and go on home
the policeman told us
there would be no more jazz to hear there
that morning.

**********

Fool Me Once
by drive-by

Isn’t he the one, son,
who has been seen lurking about
our manicured lawns
and white life.

Get the truck.

Lock and load, daddy?

Lock and load, son,
we’re gonna end his run.

**********

How Do I Look?*
by NancyGene

The subject of my aggression
soon changed his perception
when I shot him in the head.

Any crimes bold like that,
presume that they are mine.

The cops tried their best to grill me
but I can do a fine crime spree,
I look sad like a basset hound
and win the case hands down;
I’ve never been confined.

I don’t do a masquerade to catch them,
so they’ll never know they’re in my snare.
But these blockheads lust visibly--
I show what I want to show,
am through when I run them through,
and hardly muss my hair.

The topic of my affliction
will cause some major friction,
from fright to mostly dead.

I’ve learned not to tip my hand,
before I plug the swines.

*With thanks to “The Object of My Affection” by Coy Poe, Jimmie Grier, and Pinky Tomlin

**********

Up Up and Away
by drive-by

“Clark, you’re so conservative,
get some steel in your spine.”

“But Lois, (adjusts glasses) I am what I am.”


(Winks at camera two)

**********

Happily Ever After
by NancyGene

You think that you will be the boss.
I suppress a hearty laugh,
for you will end up at a loss,
screaming for a polygraph.

When the ring is on my finger,
shunting you to golden sidebar,
I’ll become a freelance thinker,
only loving what, not who you are.

**********

Differences
by Karen Tellefsen

What I see is just one thing
while you see something else.
I say live and you say dead;
it doesn't have a pulse.

Is it light or is it dark?
We never shall agree.
It all depends on point of view;
the different ways we see.

**********

by xip14

Sigmund Freud once said
you can't remember smells
only be reminded of them.

**********

[NancyGene]

> Perception
> by Michael Pendragon

> How strange this wide-flung, waking world
> Whereon we sojourn but an hour,
> An endless tapestry unfurled
> Before us by some higher power.

abab rhyme. We paused at “wide-flung” as we haven’t heard that before—usually it is the standard “far flung.” However, could the world be flung? Arms can be flung wide and empires can be far-flung. However, you have an alliteration with wide flung and waking world, plus the whereon in the next line, so that may work. (Though we wouldn’t have used wide-flung, but we are not you.) However, we do like the unfurled tapestry idea that shows our day or our life.

> A leaf that flutters in the breeze
> From trees that spread grand canopies
> Beneath the dragon-clouded sky.
> The Autumn chill, the April rain
> The winds that sweep across the plain
> The locomotive's hoboed cry
> That cuts the brick and mortared range
> Of towers arching toward the sun.
> The hush of night when day is done...
> How strange, how very strange.

aabccbdeed rhyme, with internal rhyme in line 2. We like “dragon-clouded sky,” as clouds do take on that fire-breathing look. We don’t like “winds that sweep across the plain.” Oklahoma, anyone?

The locomotive’s horn does have the sound of a cry, hobo or not. Plaintive.

> Life ofttimes seems a shadowplay
> Spilled forth from pools of liquid light,
> How does one tell a dream by day
> From those he dreams at night?
> How does one gauge when life began
> Or where our dayfly journey ends
> Or parse the patchwork fool called Man
> Whose motley, pasteboard world depends
> On ropes and pulleys worked by unseen hands?

ababcdcdc rhyme, which certainly varies the rhyme from stanza to stanza. Did you know that there is a Liquid Light-Up Pool Cue? We would have used a different word the second time for dreams. We looked up “dayfly,” which has a lifespan of about 2 days, which is short enough for the symbolism started in the first stanza. We also like the “ropes and pulleys” idea of life being controlled by something we cannot see—the Wizard?

> And when the final curtain falls
> And silence supersedes applause
> We shuffle off the darkened stage,
> And as our lines fade from the page
> We wonder if the playwright understands.

abccd rhyme, not coordinating with the other parts of the poem. We like and simultaneously don’t like this stanza. “Life is but a stage” is too much of a cliché, and the poem didn’t start out on the stage but in the wide world viewing a tapestry. However, you have done well with lines “fade from the page,” and we also like the question of whether the “playwright understands.” Maybe there should be an veiled allusion to the stage in the first stanza so that the last brings "it all back home?"

We notice in your poems that they are open and expansive, not stuck in one scene but as if the walls are down and we see the world in the lines. It is always a pleasure to read what you write and to see how you write it.

[nobodyh...@yahoo.com]

On Wednesday, May 20, 2020 at 9:02:32 PM UTC-4, NancyGene wrote:
> > Perception
> > by Michael Pendragon
>
> > How strange this wide-flung, waking world
> > Whereon we sojourn but an hour,
> > An endless tapestry unfurled
> > Before us by some higher power.
>
> abab rhyme. We paused at “wide-flung” as we haven’t heard that before—

Probably the same way you haven't heard "sane", "legible" or "intercourse".

[Michael Pendragon]

On Wednesday, May 20, 2020 at 9:02:32 PM UTC-4, NancyGene wrote:

> > Perception
> > by Michael Pendragon
>
> > How strange this wide-flung, waking world
> > Whereon we sojourn but an hour,
> > An endless tapestry unfurled
> > Before us by some higher power.
>
> abab rhyme. We paused at “wide-flung” as we haven’t heard that before—usually it is the standard “far flung.” However, could the world be flung? Arms can be flung wide and empires can be far-flung. However, you have an alliteration with wide flung and waking world, plus the whereon in the next line, so that may work. (Though we wouldn’t have used wide-flung, but we are not you.) However, we do like the unfurled tapestry idea that shows our day or our life.
>

I like to flatter myself that I'm coining new words as I go... then I get to a computer, look it up, and *always* find that somebody beat me to it.

> > A leaf that flutters in the breeze
> > From trees that spread grand canopies
> > Beneath the dragon-clouded sky.
> > The Autumn chill, the April rain
> > The winds that sweep across the plain
> > The locomotive's hoboed cry
> > That cuts the brick and mortared range
> > Of towers arching toward the sun.
> > The hush of night when day is done...
> > How strange, how very strange.
>
> aabccbdeed rhyme, with internal rhyme in line 2. We like “dragon-clouded sky,” as clouds do take on that fire-breathing look. We don’t like “winds that sweep across the plain.” Oklahoma, anyone?
>

I know... I heard it too. I tried a few substitutes, but they all sounded exactly like what they were: poor attempts to keep the line from sounding like "Oklahoma." I realized that I'm not going to come up with anything better than, or even equal to, Hammerstein, so I might as well just paraphrase it.

> The locomotive’s horn does have the sound of a cry, hobo or not. Plaintive.
>
> > Life ofttimes seems a shadowplay
> > Spilled forth from pools of liquid light,
> > How does one tell a dream by day
> > From those he dreams at night?
> > How does one gauge when life began
> > Or where our dayfly journey ends
> > Or parse the patchwork fool called Man
> > Whose motley, pasteboard world depends
> > On ropes and pulleys worked by unseen hands?
>
> ababcdcdc rhyme, which certainly varies the rhyme from stanza to stanza. Did you know that there is a Liquid Light-Up Pool Cue?
>

I do now.

I just Googled it and found one for sale at Walmart.

> We would have used a different word the second time for dreams. We looked up “dayfly,” which has a lifespan of about 2 days, which is short enough for the symbolism started in the first stanza. We also like the “ropes and pulleys” idea of life being controlled by something we cannot see—the Wizard?
>
> > And when the final curtain falls
> > And silence supersedes applause
> > We shuffle off the darkened stage,
> > And as our lines fade from the page
> > We wonder if the playwright understands.
>
> abccd rhyme, not coordinating with the other parts of the poem. We like and simultaneously don’t like this stanza. “Life is but a stage” is too much of a cliché, and the poem didn’t start out on the stage but in the wide world viewing a tapestry. However, you have done well with lines “fade from the page,” and we also like the question of whether the “playwright understands.” Maybe there should be an veiled allusion to the stage in the first stanza so that the last brings "it all back home?"
>

That's an idea.

My guess is that the poem is supposed to progress from the speaker's noticing the "strangeness" of the world, to his questioning its existence. I have to guess because I often had no idea what my Muse was shooting for until several months later.

She's funny that way.

> We notice in your poems that they are open and expansive, not stuck in one scene but as if the walls are down and we see the world in the lines. It is always a pleasure to read what you write and to see how you write it.
>

And it's always a delight to read your critiques -- thanks again, NancyGene.

[Michael Pendragon]

Upon further consideration...

The first half of the poem seems to be focusing primarily on movement/change. The second half switches to examples of artifice and illusion.
The question is what, if anything, links the two sections together?

I think that the link is in the transience of a world continually in flux, coupled with the brief span of human life. Nothing has any permanence -- it's all shadows, dreams, stagecraft (only a paper moon & co.). The "fading page" of life's script at the end is attempting to specifically link the flux/mutability of the first half to the illusion/artifice of the second.

The speaker points out the link by questioning how we know when/where life begins/ends. IOW: Is humankind as transient/illusory as the world around us? The final line extends the question to God: does God understand why we're here? If we exist? -- and, possibly, brings God's existence into question as well.

[NancyGene]

> The Eyes of Age
> by Michael Pendragon

> When I was young, I marveled at the sky
> Rolled in the fragrant grass with wanton glee
> Drew faces on the clouds that sauntered by
> Caught wood nymphs peeking out of every tree
> Delighted in the songs of Summer wrens
> That filled the day with symphonies of joy,
> The solitude of sultry Summer glens
> Where black-eyed Susans watched a sun-browned boy
> Enchanted by the beauty of the scene.

ababcdcde rhyme. We notice that you put in only one comma at the end of a line—they don’t need them anyway. We are not sure that we like “sauntered” as describing what clouds do, but of course they can’t drift by in a poem! The black-eyed Susans watching the browned boy is nice! You have two lines in a row that start with a T.

> And every day new wonders would unfold
> As Earth unrolled her tapestries of green.
> In Harvestime, I watched them turn to gold
> Or blaze with hearthfire's scarlet-orange flame.

abab rhyme. Maybe wonders could do something other than unfold, although another word wouldn’t necessarily rhyme with gold. We like the hearthfire colors. You have two lines in a row that start with “A.” No more tapestries! You already used that in your “Perception” poem!

> Then Old Man Winter spread his robes of white
> And snowflake pixies bade me join their game
> While goosedown blankets welcomed me each night.

aca rhyme. We can’t think of another phrase for Old Man Winter but rather like that in the eyes and words of a small boy. Snowflake pixies is another fine visual.

> Then Spring arrived with crocus-scented mirth
> And Easter buds pinks as the morning skies;
> I didn't stop to think what life was worth
> Or count the sparkles in my mother's eyes.

abab rhyme. The introduction of the “didn’t stop to think” and consideration of closely seeing his mother introduces the last stanza, although “didn’t stop to think” might be reworded. You have two stanzas in a row that start with “Then.” We would use another word in one for variety and to avoid the feeling that one has already read the line.

> But staggered years bore heavy on my back
> And worry wore my sun-blanched hair to gray,
> I watch the world and wonder what I lack
> And how I let life's mystery slip away.

Which brings the poem back to the first stanza of the author looking back. “When I was a child, I spoke as a child…” We like the “staggered years” line, which is sad.

Is he looking back at “life’s mystery” or life’s wonder and whimsy? Probably all of those. Again, you have written a sweeping poem, with changing scenes and seasons. We found the poem to be poignant and moving.

[ktell...@gmail.com]

On Wednesday, May 20, 2020 at 9:02:32 PM UTC-4, NancyGene wrote:

I've been enjoying these also.

[Michael Pendragon]

After I signed off last night, my Muse explained to me that the allusion to "Oklahoma" is meant to foreshadow the switch to theater in the second half of the poem.

I realize that my relationship with my Muse may strike some people as odd, and I'd like to make it clear that I don't hear voices or anything... Her communications are more like thoughts that suddenly burst into my consciousness from some unknown, numinous source.

[Michael Pendragon]

On Thursday, May 21, 2020 at 6:07:23 AM UTC-4, NancyGene wrote:
> > The Eyes of Age
> > by Michael Pendragon
>
> > When I was young, I marveled at the sky
> > Rolled in the fragrant grass with wanton glee
> > Drew faces on the clouds that sauntered by
> > Caught wood nymphs peeking out of every tree
> > Delighted in the songs of Summer wrens
> > That filled the day with symphonies of joy,
> > The solitude of sultry Summer glens
> > Where black-eyed Susans watched a sun-browned boy
> > Enchanted by the beauty of the scene.
>
> ababcdcde rhyme. We notice that you put in only one comma at the end of a line—they don’t need them anyway. We are not sure that we like “sauntered” as describing what clouds do, but of course they can’t drift by in a poem!
>

It's a bit of anthropomorphism that, hopefully, isn't too big of a stretch for clouds. If clouds were to walk across the sky in the Summer of my childhood, I like to think they'd be taking a leisurely stroll.

>
The black-eyed Susans watching the browned boy is nice! You have two lines in a row that start with a T.
>

Granted. At least it's not as bad as having two "The"s or two "That"s.

> > And every day new wonders would unfold
> > As Earth unrolled her tapestries of green.
> > In Harvestime, I watched them turn to gold
> > Or blaze with hearthfire's scarlet-orange flame.
>
> abab rhyme. Maybe wonders could do something other than unfold, although another word wouldn’t necessarily rhyme with gold. We like the hearthfire colors. You have two lines in a row that start with “A.” No more tapestries! You already used that in your “Perception” poem!
>

Now, that's not fair! :-) Each poem should be considered as a separate entity.

> > Then Old Man Winter spread his robes of white
> > And snowflake pixies bade me join their game
> > While goosedown blankets welcomed me each night.
>
> aca rhyme. We can’t think of another phrase for Old Man Winter but rather like that in the eyes and words of a small boy. Snowflake pixies is another fine visual.
>
> > Then Spring arrived with crocus-scented mirth
> > And Easter buds pinks as the morning skies;
> > I didn't stop to think what life was worth
> > Or count the sparkles in my mother's eyes.
>
> abab rhyme. The introduction of the “didn’t stop to think” and consideration of closely seeing his mother introduces the last stanza, although “didn’t stop to think” might be reworded. You have two stanzas in a row that start with “Then.”
>

Ruh-roh! I'm slipping.

>
We would use another word in one for variety and to avoid the feeling that one has already read the line.
>

I'd considered doing that, but wanted to stress the almost mechanical repetition as a means of reflecting the banality of the inevitable passage of time. I'm afraid I may have succeeded a little too well in that regard.

> > But staggered years bore heavy on my back
> > And worry wore my sun-blanched hair to gray,
> > I watch the world and wonder what I lack
> > And how I let life's mystery slip away.
>
> Which brings the poem back to the first stanza of the author looking back. “When I was a child, I spoke as a child…” We like the “staggered years” line, which is sad.
>
> Is he looking back at “life’s mystery” or life’s wonder and whimsy? Probably all of those.
>

All... but mostly he's looking back with a sense of sadness at having irrevocably lost them.

>
Again, you have written a sweeping poem, with changing scenes and seasons. We found the poem to be poignant and moving.
>

Thanks again, NancyGene. Your insightful reviews always provide a feast for thought.

[Michael Pendragon]

Thanks, Karen.

[NancyGene]

Okay, we will have to look for those signs in future poems from you. A stage direction, if you will. A surrey from the fringe elements.

> I realize that my relationship with my Muse may strike some people as odd, and I'd like to make it clear that I don't hear voices or anything... Her communications are more like thoughts that suddenly burst into my consciousness from some unknown, numinous source.

You may be communicating with Joan of Arc. Do you feel any religious stirrings or the desire to lead an army?

[Michael Pendragon]

No... that would be silly. I just fantasize about taking over the world.

[Peter J Ross]

In alt.arts.poetry.comments on Sat, 23 May 2020 21:28:27 -0700 (PDT),

Michael Pendragon wrote:

> No... that would be silly. I just fantasize about taking over the world.

To paraphrase Tom Baker (in a line written by Douglas Adams):

If you took over the world, what would you do with it? Apart from
SHOUTING at it, of course?



--
PJR :-)

μεγάλη ἡ ἀλήθεια καὶ ὑπερισχύει.
- Esdras A 4.41

[Michael Pendragon]

On Friday, June 5, 2020 at 4:16:01 PM UTC-4, Peter J Ross wrote:
> In alt.arts.poetry.comments on Sat, 23 May 2020 21:28:27 -0700 (PDT),
> Michael Pendragon wrote:
>
> > No... that would be silly. I just fantasize about taking over the world.
>
> To paraphrase Tom Baker (in a line written by Douglas Adams):
>
> If you took over the world, what would you do with it? Apart from
> SHOUTING at it, of course?

I would create a utopian society in which there is no war, hunger, poverty, prejudice, pollution or crime.

I would do away with money (and barter). Everyone would work to the best of his/her ability, and everyone would receive similar necessities and comfort goods from the government.

Our first job would be to build underground dwellings, and to restore the Earth's surface to a controlled natural state. We would, in effect, become caretakers of a "Garden of Eden" that spans the entire globe.*

*As a precautionary measure against becoming Morlocks, everyone would work above ground, only retiring to their underground homes for dinner and sleep.

Earth's garden would be divided into arable land spaces for growing food crops, and wildlife preserves. Undersea farming would also be cultivated.

Animal life would be held as valuable as human life, and killing, eating or wearing animal products would be punishable by death.

Law breakers and layabouts would be terminated.

To recap what should be obvious at this point:

1) My One World/One World Leader form of government would automatically render war a thing of the past, as there will be no other countries to make war with.

2) Hunger would end, because *all* of our citizens would be receiving sufficient nourishment from the Government -- both in terms of rationed groceries and meal tickets to our finest restaurants.

3) Poverty would naturally end with the elimination of wealth. Everyone will receive equal rations and similar living quarters with all of the same amenities.

4) Racial/ethnic prejudice would be eradicated, as people of all creeds and colors will be living and working side by side for a common cause.

5) Energy sources which cause pollution would be immediately stopped. Energy sources would be primarily solar, wind and water (plus natural heat from living in the earth). Disposable paper, and all plastic/non-biodegradable items would no longer be manufactured.

6) Crime would end for the following reasons: a) in a classless society where everyone possesses the same things, lives in the same houses, has all of their needs fulfilled by the Government would have no need for criminal activity; b) law breakers would be immediately terminated.

[ktell...@gmail.com]

Lovely pipe dream, but true benevolent dictators are rare. The biggest problem is people; people are selfish, lazy and unpredictable. Communistic society typically fail. Maybe a computer program would make the best leader.

Under ground housing is an interesting idea, less heating and cooling are needed. Currently these sort of houses are built into hillsides.

There would necessarily need to a transition time of several years between polluting to nonpolluting energy.

[Peter J Ross]

In alt.arts.poetry.comments on Fri, 5 Jun 2020 20:03:24 -0700 (PDT),

Michael Pendragon wrote:

> On Friday, June 5, 2020 at 4:16:01 PM UTC-4, Peter J Ross wrote:
>> In alt.arts.poetry.comments on Sat, 23 May 2020 21:28:27 -0700
>> (PDT), Michael Pendragon wrote:
>>
>> > No... that would be silly. I just fantasize about taking over
>> > the world.
>>
>> To paraphrase Tom Baker (in a line written by Douglas Adams):
>>
>> If you took over the world, what would you do with it? Apart from
>> SHOUTING at it, of course?
>
> I would

<snip>

So you'd be yet another Marxist. How boring!

[ktell...@gmail.com]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GBkT19uH2RQ

[ME]

Omg. That cracked ME up!!
Thank you Karen.

[Zod]

On Friday, June 5, 2020 at 11:03:25 PM UTC-4, Michael Pendragon wrote:
>
> 2) Hunger would end, because *all* of our citizens would be receiving sufficient nourishment from the Government -- both in terms of rationed groceries and meal tickets to our finest restaurants.
>
> 3) Poverty would naturally end with the elimination of wealth. Everyone will receive equal rations and similar living quarters with all of the same amenities.

Okay, sounds like a plan....

Ha ha ha....

[Michael Pendragon]

[Michael Pendragon]

> Morning Perceptions
> by Will Dockery
>
> To awaken on the morning of the journey
> cross out the front lawn

Yard tic tac toe?

> to the pass.

When a poem starts off with gibberish, it doesn't bode well for the remainder of the text. At this point, experienced readers would stop reading it, and experienced editors would consign it to the circular file.

> It was a crisp blue Spring morning in Atlanta
> the sky was a rich cobalt color
> the skyline
> seemed melancholy and sparse.

Here we have three sentences strung together into one, run-on non-sentence. Cobalt is redundant as the sky has already been described as "blue."

Unless a significant portion of the city had collapsed overnight, the skyline should have seemed no different than it had the day before.

> Morning perceptions
> of the
> mother of the hill.

Damn, that's one mother of a hill! It's also a sentence fragment.

> The hot dog skate land pizza pie with cheese
> and all the wide-eyed people
> in the park.

Another fragment. I don't even want to speculate as to what a "hot dog skate land pizza pie with cheese" is -- nor, for that matter, do I wish to consider one without cheese.

> We sat on the concrete slabs
> of an abandoned highway
> overlooking the sewage dunes.

Who are "we"? Have the wide-eyed park people joined you?

I'm happy to say that I've never had the experience of watching sewage dunes. In fact, I can't imagine any situation in which there would be enough accumulated sewage to create a landscape of dunes.

> There was a balmy wind
> cutting from the South.

Let's hope that the sewage dunes were to the north of you.

> The horns were instantaneous and gone
> gone as quickly
> merged in with the other city sounds.

Run-on gibberish.

> An impossible group of cars roared by
> they left me disturbed.

Two sentences morphed into one run-on non-sentence.

What is an impossible group of cars? If the cars are impossible, how could they roar by?

> So let them all just vanish in the night

But... it's morning.

It's also a run-on sentence.

> take their bright showmanship
> and egg rolls, too.

So the cars are "impossible" because they're made out of egg rolls?

> Break it up soon and go on home
> the policeman told us
> there would be no more jazz to hear there
> that morning.

Run-on.

When was there any jazz to hear?

The only sounds mentioned were car horns and traffic.


The narrative:

Will wakes up and crosses out his lawn.
The blue sky was blue.
The skyline was sparse and sad.
There is a mother of a hill.
Patrons at an amusement park stare in wide-eyed amazement at a "hot dog skate land pizza pie with cheese."
Will and some of the patrons sit on concrete highway slabs and watch sewage dunes.
It was windy.
Horns were heard.
Cars roar by.
Morning has become night.
The cars have egg rolls.
A policeman tells Will and his wide-eyed friends to go home.
There will be no more jazz to hear.

There is no narrative cohesion. Nothing is connected. Nothing has anything to do with anything else.

If these are "morning perceptions," why does the latter part of the poem take place at night?

What have the "perceptions" to do with anything?

> **********
>
> Fool Me Once
> by drive-by
>
> Isn’t he the one, son,
> who has been seen lurking about
> our manicured lawns

> and white life[?]

"Manicured lawns and white life" doesn't read naturally.

> Get the truck.
>
> Lock and load, daddy?
>
> Lock and load, son,
> we’re gonna end his run.

The latter portion feels much more realistic.

AFAICS someone is "lurking" in a segregated, white neighborhood and a family lynching seems immanent.

I don't see where anyone has been fooled.

> **********
>

[NancyGene]

Yay, Michael returns to reviewing the Sunday Sampler poems! And this review is Pauline Kael-worthy!

[ME]

Will has difficulty putting his thoughts, opinions and feelings into comprehendible words.
When asked for simple opinions on things, including his own poetry, he refuses to.
I believe that someone who claims to have dedicated over 45 years of their life to writing should be able to actually write and express themselves coherently.

[Will Dockery]

On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 3:31:42 PM UTC-4, ME wrote:
>
> Will has difficulty putting his thoughts, opinions and feelings into comprehendible words

No, I don't.

Poetry is a different form of writing from other forms, it can allow different approaches.

;)

[ME]

Will, you have difficulty expressing comprehensible thoughts.
Poetry has to make sense. Purvey a thought, feeling or vision. Yours doesn’t.
It’s acid burnout gibberish.

[Will Dockery]

On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 3:39:50 PM UTC-4, ME wrote:
>
> Poetry has to make sense

"What does this "mean?" I know, I know, a poem should not mean, but be."
-Roger Ebert

;)

[ME]

Bullshit will.
Like I just pointed out, you can’t use your own words to make a point or to defend what you’ve written.
You have a very limited knowledge of the English language and how to properly use it.
Your literary skills are very limited.
Your gibberish writings are just that. Gibberish.

[Will Dockery]

On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 4:17:20 PM UTC-4, ME wrote:
>
> you can’t use your own words to make a point

Wrong, these are my words:

[ME]

IOW, you don’t know how to write things that are comprehensible.
Good to know.

[W.Dockery]

On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 4:27:32 PM UTC-4, ME wrote:
> On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 4:23:07 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> > On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 4:17:20 PM UTC-4, ME wrote:
> > >
> > > you can’t use your own words to make a point
> >
> > Wrong, these are my words:
> >
> > "No, I don't. Poetry is a different form of writing from other forms, it can allow different approaches."
> >
> > :)
>
> IOW, you don’t know

Write a person who admits she doesn't even like poetry:


"Truth be told, I really don’t like poetry that much." -"Me"

https://groups.google.com/d/msg/alt.arts.poetry.comments/MCQ8uk0Il10/aoJ1qmfWCAAJ

:D

[ME]

You keep reposting a random statement I made. But my poems are comprehensible and readable.
And I’ve only been doing it for less than 3 years.
What does that say about you and your inability to write anything that even remotely resembles poetry.

[W.Dockery]

On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 4:38:57 PM UTC-4, ME wrote:
> On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 4:34:03 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> > On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 4:27:32 PM UTC-4, ME wrote:
> > > On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 4:23:07 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> > > > On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 4:17:20 PM UTC-4, ME wrote:
> > > > >
> > > > > you can’t use your own words to make a point
> > > >
> > > > Wrong, these are my words:
> > > >
> > > > "No, I don't. Poetry is a different form of writing from other forms, it can allow different approaches."
> > > >
> > > > :)
> > >
> > > IOW, you don’t know
> >
> > Write a person who admits she doesn't even like poetry:
> >
> >
> > "Truth be told, I really don’t like poetry that much." -"Me"
> >
> > https://groups.google.com/d/msg/alt.arts.poetry.comments/MCQ8uk0Il10/aoJ1qmfWCAAJ
> >
> > :D
>
> You keep reposting a random statement

Random, but true, correct?

[ME]

No.

[W.Dockery]

Your statement:

"Truth be told, I really don’t like poetry that much." -"Me"

https://groups.google.com/d/msg/alt.arts.poetry.comments/MCQ8uk0Il10/aoJ1qmfWCAAJ

Was not true?

Do tell.

:)

[Michael Pendragon]

Unfortunately for you, gibberish isn't one of them.

[Will Dockery]

Your narrow minded opinion of what poetry should be is noted, Pendragon.

:)

[ME]

On Tuesday, 4 August 2020 17:17:23 UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> Your narrow minded opinion of what poetry should be is noted, Pendragon.
>
> :)

That’s a lie will. Michael is very adept in the meaning and idea of poetry.
You, not so much.

[Will Dockery]

No, it is obvious that Pendragon is unfit for reviewing certain forms of poetry due to his biased views.

[ME]

On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 5:38:23 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> No, it is obvious that Pendragon is unfit for reviewing certain forms of poetry due to his biased views.

No, that’s not true will.
Michael has proven through the years that he’s unbiased.

[W.Dockery]

On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 6:16:09 PM UTC-4, ME wrote:
> On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 5:38:23 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
>

> > No, it is obvious that Pendragon is unfit for reviewing certain forms of poetry due to his biased views.
>
>

> Michael has proven through the years that he’s unbiased

Not with certain forms of poetry:

https://groups.google.com/d/msg/alt.arts.poetry.comments/49a7-W02I0E/ydzf1mrlCgAJ

"I'd simply burn the garbage churned out by no-talent phonies like Bukowski, Kerouac and Ginsberg." -Michael Pendragon

HTH & HAND.

[ME]

Just because he, like evidently others, don’t like certain poets, doesn’t mean he’s unbiased to good poetry.
Your tacky agenda of plucking choice statements (posts) of others and reposting them here only makes you look childish and redundant.

[W.Dockery]

On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 6:32:37 PM UTC-4, ME wrote:
> On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 6:26:03 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> > On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 6:16:09 PM UTC-4, ME wrote:

> > > On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 5:38:23 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> > >
> > > > No, it is obvious that Pendragon is unfit for reviewing certain forms of poetry due to his biased views.
> > >
> > >

> > > Michael has proven through the years that he’s unbiased
> >
> > Not with certain forms of poetry:
> >
> > https://groups.google.com/d/msg/alt.arts.poetry.comments/49a7-W02I0E/ydzf1mrlCgAJ
> >
> > "I'd simply burn the garbage churned out by no-talent phonies like Bukowski, Kerouac and Ginsberg." -Michael Pendragon
> >
> > HTH & HAND.
>
> Just because he, like evidently others, don’t like certain poets, doesn’t mean he’s unbiased

He's biased against quite a few forms of poetry.

[ME]

No he’s not. That’s a lie will.

[W.Dockery]

Yes, he is biased and admits it:

https://groups.google.com/d/msg/alt.arts.poetry.comments/49a7-W02I0E/ydzf1mrlCgAJ

"I'd simply burn the garbage churned out by no-talent phonies like Bukowski, Kerouac and Ginsberg." -Michael Pendragon

---

[W.Dockery]

Yes, he admits he has a bias:

https://groups.google.com/d/msg/alt.arts.poetry.comments/49a7-W02I0E/ydzf1mrlCgAJ

"I'd simply burn the garbage churned out by no-talent phonies like Bukowski, Kerouac and Ginsberg." -Michael Pendragon

***

[ME]

He’s saying that their work is shit. Not all modern poetry.
Just because you worship them doesn’t mean that everyone else does.

[W.Dockery]

Calling three of the greatest poets of the 20th century shit is definitely biased.

:)

[ME]

On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 7:40:04 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> Calling three of the greatest poets of the 20th century shit is definitely biased.
>
> :)

Well, if he had done that, it would seem biased. But he didn’t.

[Rocky]

ME wrote:

> On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 5:38:23 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
>> No, it is obvious that Pendragon is unfit for reviewing certain forms of poetry due to his biased views.

>

> Michael has proven through the years

That he is a lying gay lamer...?

Yes, we know that...

[Rocky]

Will Dockery wrote:

> Your narrow minded opinion of what poetry should be is noted, Pendragon.

> :)

As he shows every day...

[Michael Pendragon]

Thank you, ME.

Yes, Will, that is a lie.

Both ME and Jim write modern poetry, and I like many examples of their work.

[Michael Pendragon]

You are lying, again, Will.

I have never admitted any such thing.

The fact that I would burn the work of "no-talent phonies" does not translate to my having a prejudice against *all* modern poetry.

You are functionally illiterate.

Learn English.

[Jordy C]

I suspect that Michael’s most serious problem is his lack
of morals and values... his wanting to drop nuclear bombs on Middle eastern countries, for example! That is sick and depraved and cruel and monstrous and vile and evil, to put it mildly!

[Michael Pendragon]

On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 10:27:41 AM UTC-4, jdcha...@gmail.com wrote:
> I suspect that Michael’s most serious problem is his lack
> of morals and values... his wanting to drop nuclear bombs on Middle eastern countries, for example! That is sick and depraved and cruel and monstrous and vile and evil, to put it mildly!

My morality is relativistic -- not AWOL.

I suggest that you read Nietzsche's "Beyond Good and Evil," and Machiavelli's "The Prince" before passing ill-considered (and, characteristically childish) judgements.

[hierony...@gmail.com]

Have you seen the president's recent interview with
Jonathan Swan of Axios? If so, what are your thoughts?

[Michael Pendragon]

No, I haven't seen it.

As to Jonathan Swan, I don't know. I don't know Jonathan Swan. He doesn't subscribe to my youtube channel.

[Conley Brothers]

On Tuesday, August 4, 2020 at 12:34:39 PM UTC-4, Michael Pendragon wrote:
> > Morning Perceptions
> > by Will Dockery
> >
> > To awaken on the morning of the journey
> > cross out the front lawn
>
> Yard tic tac toe?
>
> > to the pass.
>
> When a poem starts off with gibberish, it doesn't bode well for the remainder of the text. At this point, experienced readers would stop reading it, and experienced editors would consign it to the circular file.
>

Experienced readers that were unfortunate enough to have experienced reading a Will Dockery poem would not even start to read his garbage. The only value it has is train wreck comedy.

[ktell...@gmail.com]

On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 10:27:41 AM UTC-4, Jordy C wrote:
> I suspect that Michael’s most serious problem is his lack
> of morals and values... his wanting to drop nuclear bombs on Middle eastern countries, for example! That is sick and depraved and cruel and monstrous and vile and evil, to put it mildly!

Erm, do you have a link for this?

Not only is dropping a bomb in the Middle East evil, it's also stupid. The nuclear fallout would spread into other countries that are allies. It may also cause an unnecessary war.

[hierony...@gmail.com]

Oh, okay. You’re missed it. Gotcha. No worries.

[Michael Pendragon]

> How Do I Look?*
> by NancyGene
>
> The subject of my aggression
> soon changed his perception
> when I shot him in the head.

Three lines in, and I already love this poem. It's based on a song I've loved for decades and contains some decidedly dark humor.

> Any crimes bold like that,
> presume that they are mine.

I would change it to: "Any crimes as bold as that," to fit the meter better.

> The cops tried their best to grill me
> but I can do a fine crime spree,
> I look sad like a basset hound
> and win the case hands down;
> I’ve never been confined.

I tried working on the meter here as well, but regrettably had to drop "grill" (which admirably rhymes with the original "thrill") in order to keep the paired "me"s.

The cops tried the best to net me
but they'll never get me
I'll win the case hands down;
With my sad puppy dog eyes
I'll never be confined.

> I don’t do a masquerade to catch them,
> so they’ll never know they’re in my snare.
> But these blockheads lust [for me] visibly--
> I [can] show what I want to show,
> am through when I run them through,
> and hardly muss my hair.
>
> The topic of my affliction
> will cause some major friction,
> from fright to mostly dead.
>
> I’ve learned not to tip my hand,
> before I plug the swines.

While "swines" is acceptable, "swine" is generally considered plural and makes for a better match with the original "mine."

> *With thanks to “The Object of My Affection” by Coy Poe, Jimmie Grier, and Pinky Tomlin


***********
>
> Up Up and Away
> by drive-by
>
> “Clark, you’re so conservative,
> get some steel in your spine.”
>
> “But Lois, (adjusts glasses) I am what I am.”
>
>
> (Winks at camera two)

I'm afraid I've missed the joke.

Is the allusion to Popeye the Sailor or La Cage aux Folles? Or something else entirely?

> **********

[Michael Pendragon]

I believe that when a foreign power declares war on one's country (as ISIL has declared war on the US) it is the duty of one's country to eliminate the threat -- as fully and irrevocably as possible.

I'd proposed a nuclear strike *partially* in jest -- although the underlying sentiment is the same: eliminate all possible adversaries.

Certainly, I'd prefer the strike to be as environmentally friendly, and I shouldn't want there to be any negative effects for Israel as a result. I believe my initial statement ran something along these lines:

Had I been President on 9/11, as of 9/12 the Middle East would consist solely of Israel in the middle of a hopefully not too radioactive sea.

[ktell...@gmail.com]

On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 11:58:45 AM UTC-4, Michael Pendragon wrote:
> On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 11:35:27 AM UTC-4, ktell...@gmail.com wrote:
> > On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 10:27:41 AM UTC-4, Jordy C wrote:
> > > I suspect that Michael’s most serious problem is his lack
> > > of morals and values... his wanting to drop nuclear bombs on Middle eastern countries, for example! That is sick and depraved and cruel and monstrous and vile and evil, to put it mildly!
> > Erm, do you have a link for this?
> >
> > Not only is dropping a bomb in the Middle East evil, it's also stupid. The nuclear fallout would spread into other countries that are allies. It may also cause an unnecessary war.
>
> I believe that when a foreign power declares war on one's country (as ISIL has declared war on the US) it is the duty of one's country to eliminate the threat -- as fully and irrevocably as possible.

ISIL is not a sovereign country; they are rebels that many consider terrorists. However, I think they are not good for the countries they are attacking and as they have attacked the US obliquely, the US is justified in fighting them. I just wish there wasn't so much collateral damage.

>
> I'd proposed a nuclear strike *partially* in jest -- although the underlying sentiment is the same: eliminate all possible adversaries.
>
> Certainly, I'd prefer the strike to be as environmentally friendly, and I shouldn't want there to be any negative effects for Israel as a result. I believe my initial statement ran something along these lines:

>
> Had I been President on 9/11, as of 9/12 the Middle East would consist solely of Israel in the middle of a hopefully not too radioactive sea.

But we were attacked by Arab terrorists out of Saudi Arabia. Attacking Saudi Arabia would be stupid; they are a US ally of convenience. So we attack Iraq, while run by a horrible dictator, at the time was not a threat to its neighbors. We stepped into a hornets' nest. We should have concentrated on destroying ISIL.

There are several sovereign countries in the middle east besides Israel. Jordan does not cause a lot of trouble, and Lebanon has been fairly peaceful lately. I would like to see the whole area evolve into several PEACEFUL sovereign states that are either friendly or neutral. I'd like Israel to stop pushing out its borders into Palestinian territory. However, I don't expect this to happen any time soon.

[Edward Rochester Esq.]

Well, I think it was on perception (the topic)..so Lois telling Clark Kent (Superman) to get some steel in his spine carried the topic..but no lose, I got a million of them :-)

Thanks M

[Michael Pendragon]

> Happily Ever After
> by NancyGene
>
> You think that you will be the boss.
> I suppress a hearty laugh,
> for you will end up at a loss,
> screaming for a polygraph.
>
> When the ring is on my finger,
> shunting you to golden sidebar,
> I’ll become a freelance thinker,
> only loving what, not who you are.

"Freelance thinker" is a wonder turn of phrase.

I suggest cutting "only" from the final line in order to keep to the meter.


> **********
>
> Differences
> by Karen Tellefsen
>
> What I see is just one thing
> while you see something else.
> I say live and you say dead;
> it doesn't have a pulse.

Normally, the lack of a pulse would determine the issue. Unless you're arguing with someone like myself who believes that supposedly "inanimate" objects have consciousness.

> Is it light or is it dark?
> We never shall agree.
> It all depends on point of view;
> the different ways we see.

This would make for an adequate child's poem -- although children are more appreciative of humorous examples of the "tomato"/"tom-ah-toe" variety.


> **********
>
> by xip14
>
> Sigmund Freud once said
> you can't remember smells
> only be reminded of them.

Okay...

Let's see if we can turn this chopped sentence into haiku form:

Sigmund Freud once said
you cannot remember smells,
only reminded.

[Michael Pendragon]

On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 12:50:55 PM UTC-4, ktell...@gmail.com wrote:
> On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 11:58:45 AM UTC-4, Michael Pendragon wrote:
> > On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 11:35:27 AM UTC-4, ktell...@gmail.com wrote:
> > > On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 10:27:41 AM UTC-4, Jordy C wrote:
> > > > I suspect that Michael’s most serious problem is his lack
> > > > of morals and values... his wanting to drop nuclear bombs on Middle eastern countries, for example! That is sick and depraved and cruel and monstrous and vile and evil, to put it mildly!
> > > Erm, do you have a link for this?
> > >
> > > Not only is dropping a bomb in the Middle East evil, it's also stupid. The nuclear fallout would spread into other countries that are allies. It may also cause an unnecessary war.
> >
> > I believe that when a foreign power declares war on one's country (as ISIL has declared war on the US) it is the duty of one's country to eliminate the threat -- as fully and irrevocably as possible.
> ISIL is not a sovereign country; they are rebels that many consider terrorists. However, I think they are not good for the countries they are attacking and as they have attacked the US obliquely, the US is justified in fighting them. I just wish there wasn't so much collateral damage.
> >

No one likes collateral damage, but it's the price one often has to pay for security.

> > I'd proposed a nuclear strike *partially* in jest -- although the underlying sentiment is the same: eliminate all possible adversaries.
> >
> > Certainly, I'd prefer the strike to be as environmentally friendly, and I shouldn't want there to be any negative effects for Israel as a result. I believe my initial statement ran something along these lines:
>
> >
> > Had I been President on 9/11, as of 9/12 the Middle East would consist solely of Israel in the middle of a hopefully not too radioactive sea.
> But we were attacked by Arab terrorists out of Saudi Arabia. Attacking Saudi Arabia would be stupid; they are a US ally of convenience.

I think that attacking Saudi Arabia would be a good thing. If we destroy the world's major source of oil, we'll *have* to turn to environmentally friendly alternatives.

> So we attack Iraq, while run by a horrible dictator, at the time was not a threat to its neighbors. We stepped into a hornets' nest. We should have concentrated on destroying ISIL.

1) President Bush declared that any state known to be supporting terrorists would be considered an enemy of the US.
2) Sodom Hussein responded by raising the stipend paid to the families of suicide bombers to $10,000.
3) President Bush declared war on Iraq. And rightly so.

> There are several sovereign countries in the middle east besides Israel. Jordan does not cause a lot of trouble, and Lebanon has been fairly peaceful lately.

Chalk them up to collateral damages as well.

> I would like to see the whole area evolve into several PEACEFUL sovereign states that are either friendly or neutral.

As would I.

H.G. Wells believed that peace could only be achieved in the Middle East by *educating* their people. Unfortunately, their individual governments brainwash and condition them from birth into a culture of intolerance and bigotry. I had hoped that the US would set up prosperous governments in Iraq, Afghanistan, etc., and that the Muslim population would become amenable to Democracy by example -- but that turned out to be yet another unrealistic pipe dream.

> I'd like Israel to stop pushing out its borders into Palestinian territory. However, I don't expect this to happen any time soon.

Screw that. The Palestines are in Israeli territory and need to be removed.

Shortly after 9/11 three Palestinian terrorists donned the uniforms of murdered Israeli soldiers and forced their way into a Jewish family's home in the Gaza territory. They murdered the family's three-year old daughter in her cradle, then left. The next day, the Palestinian Minister of Propaganda announced that the raid was "a great victory for the Freedom Fighters" -- and the Palestinian hordes cheered and celebrated.

IMO the Palestinian populace forfeited their humanity on that day, and should henceforward be treated as the inhumane savages that they are.

[ktell...@gmail.com]

I agree here. Iraq and Afghanistan are still horrible places.

>
> > I'd like Israel to stop pushing out its borders into Palestinian territory. However, I don't expect this to happen any time soon.
>
> Screw that. The Palestines are in Israeli territory and need to be removed.
>
> Shortly after 9/11 three Palestinian terrorists donned the uniforms of murdered Israeli soldiers and forced their way into a Jewish family's home in the Gaza territory. They murdered the family's three-year old daughter in her cradle, then left. The next day, the Palestinian Minister of Propaganda announced that the raid was "a great victory for the Freedom Fighters" -- and the Palestinian hordes cheered and celebrated.

This is horrible. Only monsters deliberately murder babies and it's monstrous to praise this action. I only have a very weak caveat: Jewish settler should not be in Gaza. This does not justify the action.

>
> IMO the Palestinian populace forfeited their humanity on that day, and should henceforward be treated as the inhumane savages that they are.

We have no way of knowing how many of the Palestinian people approved of this horror and how many didn't.

[NancyGene]

On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 3:49:36 PM UTC, Michael Pendragon wrote:
> > How Do I Look?*
> > by NancyGene
> >
> > The subject of my aggression
> > soon changed his perception
> > when I shot him in the head.
>
> Three lines in, and I already love this poem. It's based on a song I've loved for decades and contains some decidedly dark humor.

Thanks, Michael! We write to please.

>
> > Any crimes bold like that,
> > presume that they are mine.
>
> I would change it to: "Any crimes as bold as that," to fit the meter better.

Change accepted "under advisement."

>
> > The cops tried their best to grill me
> > but I can do a fine crime spree,
> > I look sad like a basset hound
> > and win the case hands down;
> > I’ve never been confined.
>
> I tried working on the meter here as well, but regrettably had to drop "grill" (which admirably rhymes with the original "thrill") in order to keep the paired "me"s.

Do a fast speak with the first line and bend some of the other words.

>
> The cops tried the best to net me
> but they'll never get me
> I'll win the case hands down;
> With my sad puppy dog eyes
> I'll never be confined.

Oh, we would never use "puppy dog." We like basset hound eyes better!

>
> > I don’t do a masquerade to catch them,
> > so they’ll never know they’re in my snare.
> > But these blockheads lust [for me] visibly--
> > I [can] show what I want to show,
> > am through when I run them through,
> > and hardly muss my hair.
> >
> > The topic of my affliction
> > will cause some major friction,
> > from fright to mostly dead.
> >
> > I’ve learned not to tip my hand,
> > before I plug the swines.
>
> While "swines" is acceptable, "swine" is generally considered plural and makes for a better match with the original "mine."

True on the plural for pig swines, but for human swines, we think that the plural works better. Few would understand that "swine" means multiple human swines we did away with.

>
> > *With thanks to “The Object of My Affection” by Coy Poe, Jimmie Grier, and Pinky Tomlin
>

As always, thank you, Michael, for your fine suggestions. We appreciate it that you take the time to read and comment knowledgeably on our efforts.

[Rocky]

Will Dockery wrote:

> No, it is obvious that Pendragon is unfit for reviewing certain forms of poetry due to his biased views.

Within his narrow niche he does okay, but he just doesn't get many forms of poetry...

[ME]

That’s a lie ‘zod’.

[Will Dockery]

On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 7:56:04 PM UTC-4, Rocky wrote:

As Pendragon himself admits:

https://groups.google.com/d/msg/alt.arts.poetry.comments/49a7-W02I0E/ydzf1mrlCgAJ

"I'd simply burn the garbage churned out by no-talent phonies like Bukowski, Kerouac and Ginsberg." -Michael Pendragon

HTH & HAND.

[Will Dockery]

On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 10:27:41 AM UTC-4, Jordy C wrote:
>

> I suspect that Michael’s most serious problem is his lack
> of morals and values... his wanting to drop nuclear bombs on Middle eastern countries, for example! That is sick and depraved and cruel and monstrous and vile and evil, to put it mildly!

Good thing morons like him could never be elected President...

Oh, wait...

;)

[Will Dockery]

On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 11:35:27 AM UTC-4, ktell...@gmail.com wrote:

He did write this, just yesterday:

"Had I been President on 9/11, as of 9/12 the Middle East would consist solely of Israel in the middle of a hopefully not too radioactive sea..."
-Michael Pendragon

https://groups.google.com/d/msg/alt.arts.poetry.comments/Poq8sBwXIGw/YplL4lyhAwAJ

[W.Dockery]

Pendragon's fantasy of genocide is noted.

[ME]

Why would you lie about that will?
Grow the fuck up and get a life.

[ktell...@gmail.com]

Thanks. Live plants don't have a pulse.

[W.Dockery]

Did you read what Pendragon wrote?

Or perhaps you don't understand what the word genocide means?

:)

[NancyGene]

On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 5:53:36 PM UTC, Michael Pendragon wrote:
> > Happily Ever After
> > by NancyGene
> >
> > You think that you will be the boss.
> > I suppress a hearty laugh,
> > for you will end up at a loss,
> > screaming for a polygraph.
> >
> > When the ring is on my finger,
> > shunting you to golden sidebar,
> > I’ll become a freelance thinker,
> > only loving what, not who you are.
>
> "Freelance thinker" is a wonder turn of phrase.

Thanks!

>
> I suggest cutting "only" from the final line in order to keep to the meter.

Yes, we can see that, but then the line loses the emphasis that she "only" loves "what" he is and really doesn't love him for himself. Surprise!

In looking at the line again, maybe putting a comma after "who" would help? "only loving what, not who, you are." The meter is not off by very much.

Thanks for your suggestions, Michael! We are always interesting in your opinion on our poems.

[Zod]

W.Dockery wrote:

> Calling three of the greatest poets of the 20th century shit is definitely biased.

> :)

Exactly....

[Zod]

What a bigoted moron Voodoo Boy is....

[Will Dockery]

On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 11:58:45 AM UTC-4, Michael Pendragon wrote:
> On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 11:35:27 AM UTC-4, ktell...@gmail.com wrote:
> > On Wednesday, August 5, 2020 at 10:27:41 AM UTC-4, Jordy C wrote:
>
> > > I suspect that Michael’s most serious problem is his lack
> > > of morals and values... his wanting to drop nuclear bombs on Middle eastern countries, for example! That is sick and depraved and cruel and monstrous and vile and evil, to put it mildly!
> > Erm, do you have a link for this?
> >
> > Not only is dropping a bomb in the Middle East evil, it's also stupid. The nuclear fallout would spread into other countries that are allies. It may also cause an unnecessary war.
>

> Had I been President on 9/11, as of 9/12 the Middle East would consist solely of Israel in the middle of a hopefully not too radioactive sea.

"Care to guess which one comes across as being the more ignorant?"
-Pendragon

https://groups.google.com/d/msg/alt.arts.poetry.comments/Poq8sBwXIGw/YplL4lyhAwAJ

You got that one, Pendragon, as the above statement shows, you are truly a bigoted, ignorant moron.

:)

[Rocky]