Creating an outline for our film...

[Rick1234567S]

Now I fed the story to google A.I. as I tried to get it to make an image of Sandra sprinting to her true love at night after tying bedsheets and two sweaters together after her dad blocked her exit, and said You are all I have left in the world!.

And he sent her to her room.

She was supposed to meet John at 9pm down at the road it is now 9:15.

So she had descended down her bedsheets she had to bring it back in and tie two sweaters because it wasn't long enough, so she had to drag the sheets in, the clock is ticking, tie two sweaters and then descend, and so now she is in panic mode, she could hear him screaming SANDRAAAA before and now she can't hear him anymore she is running for her life.

And lightning strikes a tree and it explodes to her left about 50 yards to her left, and she doesn't even flinch!

It lights her up in a very dramatic way.

You see her from the road.

Running as fast as she can towards the camera. 

So what was the A.I. able to do to make that image, the climax of the film?

see next post...

[Rick1234567S]

Sandra is running away from home?

You see the A.I. are not intuitive. They have no soul.

They do not know what it is like to be in true love. They just don't know what it is like. So everything they do or say is what a robot would do or say or Mr. Spock.

 So even the outline if i just said give me an outline he would pick what he thinks is important to the story and maybe get it almost right.

But here and now we can look at how that is supposed to work, and just do a rough draft of a script outline.

As messy as we want, it is just looking at the key elements of our story, and even adding more if we want. If we see a spot that would make the film more interesting we will add that new key element.

The number one problem in that image is she is too young to be eloping.

Maria Sharapova at 17, won at Wimbledon again, lets look at her.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GkuDViOUcG8&t=1127s

so ok Sandra is only 16 because at 17 they look 23.

So it is important she look 16.

Not 15.

Not 17.

Here is a great song for you to help you understand not 16 candles, this one.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wyUUIUjdDRE

[Rick1234567S]

When her dad was blocking the door, he was almost in tears.

When she ran upstairs into her room she slammed the door behind her. Ripped off the blankets off her bed, grabbed the sheets tied them together.

Opened the window its raining and thunder and lightning.

She tied the bed sheet to her bed post threw it out the window but it was too short! She could hear John, SANDRAAAAA

She hauled it in looked around, sweaters! She thought, she rushed to her dresser,  threw things out over her shoulder, grabbed two sweaters, quickly tied them to her bedsheet, lowered it and right away headed out the window, still dropped a few extra feet so she had to crouch when she landed and she was running like a sprinter from that crouch position.

All the girls in the audience should be thinking RUN SANDRA RUN!

Like that Mr. Spock.

And the portal is closing, her dad somehow figured out what she did because he was also running from the house down to the road. Because the dog barked.

So she gets there and can see john through the porthole she reaches through he grabs her hand, I was there, two worlds collided.

and they will NEVER tear us apart.

But unfortunately her dad got there and pulled her back.

Two worlds collided.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AIBv2GEnXlc

[Rick1234567S]

So why don't we use that song? Its from a different story. Something that happened to me.

And in our story here, it is a family story, more than half the audience are men, women, and little girls.

And he gets the girl the portal flashes open, then closed, it flashes open again and he leaps without thinking through it.

Leaving HIS family behind.

Her dad would have been all alone in his world.

His family there are three of them. And not only that they are in heaven.

The key part here I will show you where it is. The A.I. would not get this....

"John lands hard on the road and is knocked out.

He comes to and Sandra is there, it's not raining there, the road is dry, it's noon, where am I? He asks her.

You had a car accident she says, don't try to get up, an ambulance is coming.

She is holding his hand.

The ambulance and cops pull up with sirens.

And a woman comes running up to John and Sandra, two more are running for the car, John has a cut on his forehead and so the paramedic is treating it.

How's my folks my sister?

A male paramedic crouches down, I have some bad news son, you mom you dad and your sister, didn't make it.

You got thrown clear.

Bring him into the house, Sandra's dad says."

Bring him into the house, Sandra's dad says.

Where they are now is not where he was when she was running. His attitude regarding John is not there. 

Even if it was the same world, his attitude changed. But you know it is not the same world the accident just happened there.

Bring him up to the house.

Now he will live with Sandra in the house help her dad on the farm, they will develop a love story there that is the sequel.

and in there you get both barrels. If you know what that means, it is allegory you are really going to get a love story there that will rip you apart.

Why?

Well it's just too convenient that everything is there now they already live together and her dad is a great guy there isn't even a mom to say anyting.

Taylor will write a whole album for how the world just interfered, and fate stepped in so she could write her album.

Why?

Love sings that people want are tragic. Not silly little Paul McCartney love songs or raindrops keep falling on my head.

What's it all about Alfie?

https://youtu.be/P-eg0b59P_g

Is that the best song she ever did? No, it is close, but no cigar, there are thousands of videos of her and her songs and you can search them all and listen to them all or just get lucky like I did once.

and when you find the right version to any song, make sure you make a note of it.

She nails this song near the end.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cAu3a7CMA84

[Rick1234567S]

So that is the love song from West Side story and you notice of course it is a tragedy.

Well Somewhere Valley is not a tragedy, that is where the family got to.

But not John and Sandra. They will be at Sandra's farm and having a romance. And the people in the audience will insist you do a sequel, they want to know about John and Sandra, and how things went. Many of them will piece it together oh they obviously lived happily ever after on Sandra's farm.
His parents died, so Sandra's dad is going to feel sorry for him.

And now he is not just there clinging to Sandra, he has a boy! A son! And that son can help on the farm, look there he is without his shirt on chopping wood!

All tanned and abs like what the girls want to see, and wearing those blue jeans.

But don't watch the trailer. When it comes out, you will see that and more hooks than a Japanese trawler.

But my point is that subtle ending with her dad there went by too fast for the A.I. to know how important that is.

Since that helps set things up for the sequel.

And remember the song at the end is for the family, the three who went to heaven, because half of the audience is there for them.

And that little girl is amazing. She is going to have them sobbing out loud in that theater.

When she says I am sooo lonely, they are gonna lose it.

We will see to that.

When she says I found a secret in the Bible,  everyone is gonna be like in shock. They read the Bible every Sunday and every Biblical scholar in the world has searched and searched for secrets in the Bible and some of them as well.

But this little girl she is gifted.

And the guys, her dad and her brother they didn't even pay attention to what she said they were looking at the schematic diagrams of the radio machine.

Her mom all of a sudden is like the people in the audience. What is this secret?

And the little girl has just quickly spun round slid off the bed and knows where the Bible is in the bedside table no one else even knew or cared there was one in there Gideons Bibles are in motel dressers. Or were. Lets just check our facts...

Gideons Bibles are provided by The Gideons International, an evangelical Christian association of businessmen who distribute them for free in hotels, motels, hospitals, and prisons. This century-old tradition began in 1908 as a way to offer weary travelers spiritual comfort

  

Weary travelers like them.

And so this is not just a little important this is major, to any Christian who reads the Bible or ever read the Bible.

And so the little girl has flagged the page with a bookmark, so she only has to open the book at the bookmark, to maintain the excitement of the moment she can point right at it, and cover the chapter and verse numbers with her finger when she does it. I know I am a prick you don't have a Bible? It is online!

And then the camera quickly cuts to her mom's face to see her in shock, and it only showed the worlds "There were 12 gates"

and right away yokels are gonna say THATS IT! There must be a gate in our state. They say there is a portal there somewhere.

Well of course there is and that is wear big foot comes through and the Chupacabra and the goat sucker everyone knows that.

Good luck hunting and bring your potato cam ordinary cameras can't film these mythical creatures.

But I digress. So this is the second most important part of the story.

Yet it does compete for when the little girl says I am soo lonely. That is a different part. That hits you right in the stomach.

Everyone else is out there doing things she sees a cat a couple times but it wants out right away and she is there alone almost all the time.

She is like a little angel. 

She knows things.

Even the song Maison does not do her complete justice because that girl is a little too old for our story.

I will show you a picture of her again,

[Rick1234567S]

So in this story the only person who is longing to go home is that little girl.

This family did not have far to fall. That is a small house that is a used car their jobs are ordinary jobs, and in no time they are working again, and they are not suffering.

John has a girlfriend and a new best friend Bret. They do things as 4 people because then the parents aren't even worried about them going out.

He tells his parents he is going out with Bret, she tells her dad she is going out with Janet.

That leaves Jessica.

Who has a best friend at school and we will get to hear her through her day dream a voice the voice of her best friend at school telling her about the time slip she went through when she was 7. They are 9 now.

And she will be deadly serious and sound deadly serious. We don't need to look at her. We want to remember she won't be in heaven either.

So then there is a song for her, and does it fit? Well in a way it is the best song that says what she is thinking and what everyone else is thinking but if we invest too much in it, remember how you can lose a key part of your story if you do not get this Beatles song.

For Dylan going home means everything, he is still here he calls me all the time to remind me he needs a ride home. Tow here/ Inside a moonship.

That is where people like Dylan lived, where Olympians lived. They did not live on the surface of a planet.

They lived in places like Logan's run. Or Oz, or Metropolis or In Pleasantville.

Now in Pleasantville film they take it to the limit because I was investigating the file system finding postapocalyptic moonships and also telling them things like I am telling you now.

When I was a kid in Aurora Ontario I went to Pleasantville Public School.

And I would run through the forest pretending the black helicopters were after me.

Just like this....that is where this comes from...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JRfuAukYTKg

[Rick1234567S]

2.1 billion views. See what a little inspiration can do for you?

So then here is the one where Gwendolyn was in the moonship and I went looking for her because of the film Eraserhead which is also about a postapocalyptic moonship interior she was portrayed in there.

And here for dramatic effect they went with a young girl.

At the time I was musing for a young girl who was in dance moms but it wasn't Maddie. So at first I was disappointed that the girl I was musing for didn't get picked to do the song but it was so controversial to do it at all at the time they went with Maddie instead.

So this is inside a postapocalyptic moonship and this is what they looked like inside.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vjPBrBU-TM

2.9 billion views.

[Rick1234567S]

So our heaven doesn't say it is a moonship or not it is just that the sun is yellow.

And so you don't want to go home to a ruined moonship but I cleaned up the file system and we have brand new ones now.

And we renovated those buildings even and made them all incredible inside.

But what is Bob Dylan's song about home?

He doesn't articulate what his vision of home is. When he calls me through his work he knows I know where his home is and he knows that he can't say it is in a moonship. See the society in logan's Run, beautiful people everyone is young. 

So we can't use a Dylan song even though he is all about home and going home.

We have to use the Beatles song. and so what on earth were they talking about here?

Once there was a way, to get back homeward.? 

  In his book The Lyrics, McCartney recalled thinking, "Wouldn't it be nice to get home and have that comfortable feeling again?" Because his father was living in a new house Paul had bought for him, Paul noted it wasn't quite his childhood home, but it was still "homeward." This prompt inspired him to add those opening lines to a 17th-century poem by Thomas Dekker he had found on his father's piano.  

But it is so familiar to so many people that small bit that it fits perfect when she is being tucked in by her mom the night she had said I am ssooo lonely.

But actually not perfectly well because it gets loud you see. They didn't want it equated this way. It means so much more.

Like we came from heaven, going home means going back to heaven for us.

There were 7 heavens, and those were moonships you got to through the door at Coricancha.

and they were postapocalyptic when I investigated them by pasting in a copy of my body and attaching my consciousness cam to that body with the help of my engineers.

  "I know a man in Christ who fourteen years ago was caught up to the third heaven... And I know that this man—whether in the body or apart from the body I do not know, but God knows—was caught up to paradise and heard inexpressible things, things that no one is permitted to tell."

The phrase "seventh heaven" does not actually appear in the . While the idiom is commonly used today to describe a state of pure, ecstatic happiness, it stems from ancient Jewish mystical texts, Babylonian astrology, and Islamic theology rather than the canonical biblical text.  

So golden slumbers playing while Jessica is tucked in, would you pay a million dollars to be able to put this song there?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AcQjM7gV6mI

[Rick1234567S]

I don't think it fits.

Neither Bob Dylan nor the Beatles are able to express the feeling of wanting to go back to heaven where you are from.

Sia isn't talking about going back she is talking about well we finally made it here and don't have to just look from afar and see people living the dream, like my daughter are now.

And for this family they were not even from heaven they are just from the earth but well maybe for some it is like heaven I don't know.

But going back to where your house and your friends are is what Jessica wants.

We aren't really milking that part like her pets there her favorite things, we are not going deep into any of that.

She is soo lonely well all she really needs is a friend but she can't have one she has to hit them in the stomach and we have to see that it happens.

and SHE gives the speech, SHE has the memorable lines.

 Mom, MOM! You never listen to me ever! 

When I was trying to tell you about what happened to my friend at school all you said was that's nice dear, all you ever did was tell me me to be quiet! I know what to do! 

I had a dream. 

I was in a place where the sun was yellow. 

I saw a man there. He was holding a baby lamb, on a farm. 

I asked him where I was, he smiled at me, and he said I was in heaven.

[Rick1234567S]

John could get a yellow sun and suddenly be transformed into the lamb, on the farm in heaven.

But then Taylor won't get her new album and neither will Madison. And you girls won't get your sequel and be able to see him with his shirt off.

Jessica deserves to go to heaven. That's where she belongs.

So how did they get the stomach punch in the film Pleasantville? Well with the mom.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TDai5Glbw2I

[Rick1234567S]

So they had just the tiniest bit of orchestration there and we aren't using any when Jessica says I am sooo lonely.

"Cut to the motel, the dad is talking to the mom, they want $3,000 for a new motor, 

$3,000 ???! Jill says,

yeah that's the best they can do. 
That's all the money we have.

Well then next pay day.

Jill looks at Jessica and it looks like she is crying.

Jill goes over to Jessica what's wrong sweetheart?

I'm sooo lonely.

Oh you poor thing...her mom hugs her, 

a song comes on the radio...

Once there was a way, to get back homeward, "

You see I didn't put it as a lullaby I hit them in the stomach again. 

But if need be we don't have to hit them a second time it hits the older generation of men, the women are already crying.

So is there an alternate? Sure but we can only pick songs that cost a million dollars since free ones are there but why go get one.

I could write one.

Or we could pick the long and winding road~

We can't use John Denver Take me home country roads the scene is very serious.

And it is not about the men, like this song....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gEusOoPpkEE

So what would we do? We use a bit of instrumentation just like they did in Pleasantville.

If we can't get that song and the camera leaves the motel when it gets loud and you get an aerial view of the motel and the diner and the countryside.

You don't go right into space you just drift out of the building into the air then phase shift into the next scene.

[Rick1234567S]

And from that song Going to Carolina by James Taylor that I quoted

" Now with a holy host of others standing 'round me, no no
Still I'm on the dark side of the moon
And it looks like it goes on like this forever
You must forgive me"

It is being sung by a woman because if you hear a man singing it sounds like they are off to a ho down.

If you want to hear the worst version you ever heard listen to John Denver sing it here... 

Does he know it is supposed to be heaven?

And not a road trip to Carolina?

Back to Jessica and we will hit the guys in the stomach if we can, and if not then all they get so far is the Grateful Dead during the opening credits if we even get that.

But to begin with we need to spend more time on Jessica.

She has two key elements.

One she is sooo lonely and two I found a secret in the Bible.

Lesser key elements are the cat, that includes all the cat lovers, and the mean lady the Motel Managers wife, with arthritis.

Who gives her a nasty look because of the cat.

Young kids always get thrown into an oven or something by nasty old witches.

So they will know how nasty she could be.

So the women have a solid connection to Jessica and the little girls, the men if they are a dad and have a daughter they will get hit in the stomach also.

and then some older men will get it if we add the Beatles song.

We can still fade into the aerial shot with orchestration notice it is barely audible when they did it. Just to break the silence.

So when they are in the back of the car playing rock paper scissors tickle that is a key element in that they are making noise on a road trip every dad knows about that. To find them not fighting however is unique.

[Rick1234567S]

Do guys always ask me for a ride home? Well I'm the only guy they know who has a car.

I am a scientist a physicist so at one point i didn't just hot them i the stomach, I beat the living crap out of them, and they had to call a press conference.
Normally they calmly write papers, but not this time.

I wrote M.I.T. a letter. Just like in the film The Day the Earth Stood Still 1951 film, he wrote on the chalk board.

I wrote a letter.

So then we all met in a BBS before the Internet. And I even said to them in there I will make you a beleiver.

Lets play that song first.

I could quote songs then, but I had to give them a search term, that was how I could quote files that were on BBS systems that they coudl find, and that prompted someone to create hypertext links. Also based on a shareware program I made that used them. But prior Xerox had similar on their copiers.

But the search term thing I invented and then invented the google search engine and leaked that with that same program.

and gave it to them providing that is is free for people to use.

Anyway that song...

"Make You a Believer" was originally written and recorded by Canadian rock singer Sass Jordan. She released the song in 1992 as the opening track on her breakthrough sophomore album, Racine, and co-wrote it with the album's producer, Rick Neigher

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KL7Z4RIosrI

So I tipped over their apple cart and sent their donkey fleeing into the bush so people wrote me a few songs and this one is one of them.

Black Hole Sun.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3mbBbFH9fAg

[Rick1234567S]

So you see trying to find a spiritual song by guys for guys is really difficult.

They don't express themselves very well. 

Here is one in a moonship in the tunnels of the moonship not in the terraformed interior.

and they have a Robert in there and it is full of symbolism...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2LE0KpcP05I

So you see James Taylor wasn't fooling when he said behind is a holy host of people trying to get home.

And even I can't get home.

At least not right now. l can go there i have spent like 12 hours there in a stretch but I have to come back when my body wakes up.

So with Jessica in this story she has a lot of small key elements and 5 main elements.

• The back seat when it starts the noise that distracts their dad.
• The I'm so lonely
• Her friend who told her about time slips and what not to do

• I found a secret in the Bible 

• The book on portals she got at the library.
• I had a dream.
• Interactions with the mean lady.
• Interactions with the cat.
• She does not interface with her dad much. But with her mom and her brother but mostly her mom.
• Since they have one son one daughter it works like that.
• At the end she touches her brother on the shoulder and he stands up.
• She is also holding hands with her mom when they turn to look at the sun and it is yellow.

These aren't in order but that is ok for now we have identified them by putting them in point form notation.

For this rough draft for the outline.

We can add more if we want or maybe I missed some. We double check everything later.

[Rick1234567S]

So for the guys to hit them in the stomach, we will if we use Golden slumbers, simply because of one line, once there was a way to get back homeward.

So now you need more background.

So the world ended in 1964 after the bay of pigs and all of that and it got reset back to 1947 and was marked by the Roswell incident.

So a David told me that it went down just like the film On the Beach 1959.

If you have not seen that film it is a must see with Gregory Peck.

They are set up like Adam and Eve at the end of the colonization they started 2 billion years ago.

It would have ended in 2012 anyways and so the idea of waiting until everyone turned to zombies when the sentience machine died, was not something people wanted to let happen so ending prior was through Armageddon even if they had to do it themselves.

Without sentience humans are naked apes, omnivores cannibals, and very violent and it is a messy end and not everyone is on that machine some are on the galactic mainframe and some are on the universal mainframe so not everyone would turn into a zombie.

Hiroshima and Nagasaki was the Two Missile signal. SOS Save our souls.

I am a first responder. Matrix Special ops.

BUT that was 2 billion years ago. This is very old data. It is shared data that has been used for 2 billion years since then.

If you want more information about the two missile signal, you can see two rocket flares here around the time when it first began...

Then in a film here...A Jules Verne story made into film Master of the world! 1961

So in that film people are in a balloon, and they get hit by two missies their balloon goes down and they are unhurt but it is symbolic like they reincarnate.

So without going too deep into this guy stuff lets look at On the Beach....

https://youtu.be/s9sIPJ-yGjc

[Rick1234567S]

That's a very powerful moment if you know what you are looking at there.

The last people alive were in Australia.

I saved the files. The people were all dead when I got here.

So that is a song that many people understand to be important but you notice how annoying it was when they were drunk and how meaningful it was when it was done properly.

Here it is being done in a meaningful way but notice how few people know why it is so meaningful...

Those would be the people who are crying. Including André Rieu the violinist.

https://youtu.be/7UFmwArST-I

[Rick1234567S]

Tom Waits did a song that uses the music but turns into a different song about a woman. Tom Traubert's blues.

We can hear it but none of this is going to help our dad there be spiritual in any way.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vGpwgHqlfWo

So at this point we only have Golden Slumbers, if we want to hit the dads in the stomach real hard and even at that it is not that hard.

Men see themselves as survivors, and for this dad even if they are in a time slip, he immediately knew he had to get a job.

He is thinking of his family not himself.

At one point he goes for a drink.

And a song by Waylon and Willie makes him feel guilty. 

But not so that people watching would even know why he left.

We have to add more elements since that is the only place where he is the center of attention.

So a floosy needs to hit on him. She can be a little bit drunk.

There could be something on the TV screen. But I wouldn't even bother with that. You can put an easter egg there if you want the jukebox is playing loud and you can't hear the TV.

The bartender he is always on the guys side he is only going to listen he is no help here as a moral compass.

There are two Hells angels playing pool. 

That's a sign from above. Or below if you prefer.

Those same Hells angels are in the motel beside him. They come out before the mean lady shows up about the cat.

We will work them in more of there is any dangerous time or mean and nasty time there like when the guy yells WAITRESS More COFFEE, they will be there eating food. Not as a center of attention.

It all makes it look like the entire thing was orchestrated to people who end up studying it.

[Rick1234567S]

Notice the cat leaves when the hells angels come out and fire up their Harleys.

It knows trouble is coming. And the mean lady would have caught them with the cat in the room.

So the floosy and the dad has to leave he is not the kind to fall for that.
He can get stopped by the cops he only had one drink he will not blow over.

Oh we can turn that into a horror show if we want, but it serves no purpose since we decided the young daughter is the one who is important not the dad.

He just needs a bit of something that can hit the other guys in the audience  in the stomach but guys don't get hit by sympathy for other guys.

Even Brando with his brother there in the back of the cab that is not hitting the guys in the stomach.

ADRIANNNN ADRIANNNN when Rocky is calling for his girlfriend...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tc7H9s4PdSI

[Rick1234567S]

Written and acted by Sylvester Stallone.

He did not produce or direct.

But he probably wrote that part in.

No guarantee though that it wasn't the director who did that.

All the same we are not in a position to beat up the dad. Even if the audience would feel sympathy for him.

It detracts form the main story which is a love story John and Sandra, and the young girl Jessica who is gifted and special, the parents are there as supporting actors.

So all we have to accomplish is again show that he is a good dad, one who could get into heaven and he does.

Without being a saint.

We can milk that a bit by making him more saintly but it is not really necessary. 

When he is at work on the job site make sure he is being helpful and saintly. Even when it is raining he is working hard in the rain, running a skill saw while it is raining. Not a battery pack one one that plugs in. 

Anyone who works in construction knows what that is like.

And he doesn't complain. He works hard does his job. Looks after his family.

He can interface with his son more but when the son needs to leave at 10 o'clock and his mom is worried, his dad understands and says let him go dear.

We have to try that radio.

What tonight??? Says Jill.
No tomorrow.

John says but dad that's not enough time.

We are going to be homeless here real soon if we do not get out of here.

Your father is right John.

When then?

Tomorrow night. On the road by Sandra's house.

It stopped raining now and Jessica is at the window and sees a star in the sky and closes her eyes tight and makes a wish.

John hasn't seen Sandra for over a week.

Where are you going John, its almost 10 o'clock.

I have to go somewhere. 

John his dad says.

I have to go see Sandra.

Let him go dear.

Notice I missed another key element of Jessica's So I put it in bold.

So his dad agrees with his mother he is being supportive in child raising, but he knows John has to go see Sandra he understands.

That's a good dad.

I will read the plot again to see what elements his dad Jack has...

[Rick1234567S]

There are too many typos in this thread because my monitor is too far away from where I am sitting. I will enlarge the size of the font because I find the typos really annoying.

So then I have made a decision, and that is that the dad and mom are supporting actors.

As A.I. graphics the best they can hope for is to get a nomination for a supporting actor.

The voice actors however those you will need to pay. We will look that up later because right now we want to stay focused on the outline draft that is this thread.

So with them only needing to appear as honest hard working good people will assume they can get into heaven as part of life. In the Bible it doesn't make it hard for people to go to heaven and most people assume when their loved ones die they get to heaven.

And both John and Jessica are the same way, they were raised properly with plenty of love from their mom and dad. Their mom and dad only need to speak sternly and the kids fall into line, they complain of course but they aren't like Sandra having to make a run for it. Her dad is not like their dad. His part in this particular universe where they are is one of an antagonist.

"An antagonist is a character, group, or force that opposes or creates conflict for the main character (the protagonist) in a story."

We know why he is an antagonist he is worried that he will lose Sandra and have no one. Since his wife died and he isn't exactly out there looking for a new one he is rather broken from within because HIS true love didn't make it.

Guys don't bounce back. Remember Tammy Wynette, and Stand by Your Man. She stood by George Jones her husband for almost 2 weeks and then divorced him and remarried 2 weeks after that.  And George? He stopped loving her the day he died.  

He stopped loving her, today, 

They placed a wreath upon his door, 

and soon they'll carry him away, 

he stopped loving HER today~

So Sandra's dad is one of those. And he drinks a bit. But he still gets the farm work done, and does his best for his daughter.

Cries a bit when no one is around. Keeps her picture by the bed, we can get him to pull out his shoebox of letters, and look at them, they might have water stains on them. Now finally we are kicking the guys in the nuts, and punching them in the stomach.

We will really hit them hard until they are crying too. S o he has to wipe his nose with his arm, when he looks at the photos these are the best dad and mom photos you have ever seen, like he is surfing with her on his shoulders, that was the time they went to California for the Beach boys concert.

There he is after winning the grand prix, with their mom wrapping her arms around him and people dumping champagne on him ok we are over the top back that up a bit.

We are much better off if we don't show photos and let the people imagine the scenes. The more subtle we are, the more people will feel it, that he is just holding it all in but if we are too sympathetic for him, he won't be a viable antagonist. and whatever do to him there will have an effect on the sequel and how people see him. And we don't want to write the sequel right now.

So Sandra's dad will have a larger part in the sequel, but right now in the main universe they entered and didn't die, is as a dad much like Jack, only 40, and jack is 35, so at 40 he is older and harder and farm life well he is a farmer. 

Sandra is Cinderella. Of a sort. She is Juliet of a sort. She is athletic a hard body is what call a girl like that.  She has worked on that farm, and they don't have a son but she is not a Tom Boy.

So this sums up Bill right here...

While the song plays we cut to Sandra's house they are sitting at the table eating dinner.

Not talking.

Finally he says what do you know about that boy?

Everything.

What's everything?

You know he is a nice boy.

Well he seems a bit strange to me.

Ever since your mom died I have had to look after you myself.

Dad.

Well you are only 16.

What if you get pregnant?

DAD!

Don't dad me I was his age I know what is going through his head.

Have you slept with him yet?

NO!

Thank God for that. he says.

She grabs the dishes and takes them to the sink.

He pours himself a drink.

He is the kind of dad that used to say I was in the war. The kind of dad that caught me a couple times that was the first thing they said. One said I used to kill pricks like you. Another one we are in a hotel room somehow they find us and knock on the door I open the door the mother attacks me, I protect me face he says DON"T YOU HIT HER! And again with the I was in the war.

The worst was when we were in bed in the afternoon at my house and someone pounds on the front door we stay silent, now someone is pounding on the basement door, and now they are rattling it trying to force it to open.

Then they finally go away.

One time we are in her basement rec room, making love on the couch and someone is upstairs, and so quick we jump into the closet naked, someone opens the door at the top of the stairs and comes down.

They go back up.

I escaped that time.

One time when I was younger than that we camped out on the end of May holiday and I was a perfect gentleman and didn't even kiss her we just laid together after the campfire bit slept together in the tent I really thought we could have a great romance at 16 her dad found us at the campsite in the tent and he was the one that said I used to kill pricks like you.

So lets not pretend that you don't have to be really careful when dating at 16 and 17 or even 15.

And so they use the best friend thing as shadow dating. And it works great. We won't have to test Jack thankfully since John is a guy, lol and they cannot get pregnant.

So for Jack

• He is a good father.
• He loves his wife.
• He loves his kids.
• He is hard working 
• Honest as is humanly possible under any given circumstance.
• He gets it right every time. 

His key points

• He is driving when the duck hits the windshield in his face and he crashes the car.
• He gets the newspaper from the diner.
• As a supporting actor we have him pegged in the plot in the rough draft.

He was an easy character.

For Bill,

• He is very similar to Jack only 5 years older but an important 5 years since he is hard now as a man and his wife died young and he is a broken man because of it but he hides it well.
• So Bill loves his daughter very much. She is all he has in the world that is worth living for.
• He is a stern dad a religious type but not like they were 60 years ago, but he is a believer. And this is country so he is a bit stereotypical as a country farmer in the Mid West.
• He is an antagonist because he is worried John will steal his daughter away from him. And he sees John as being strange well he did just come from a different universe in the time slip.

His key points

• He lets them use his phone and gives them a ride into town
• He has a scene with Sandra at the dinner table
• He has a scene with Sandra when she is trying to elope
• He is there at the end pulls her away from John breaks his grip on her hand.
• He is there after John leaps into yet another universe. And says Bring him up to the house, as a set up for a sequel love story. Or a breakup breakdown.

He stopped lovin her today~

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=67kVNNL5Zwc

[Rick1234567S]

No I will not play Tammy Wynette singing her song. 

I have a friend, Ms. Carry Underpants, and she is going to sing it for you because she does it better than the original.

Carrie Underwood Stand By Your man live at the grand ol opry

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BklnpoMPAvc

[Rick1234567S]

So Jill is a Sue and in Hollywood a Sue is a blond woman with a clip board, she is the person you need to speak to.

Everyone when they see a blond woman standing there with a clip board they know who to ask.

So she is stereotypical and our sue comes from heaven, so her getting back into heaven is a no brainer.

And so I can paint her character for you....in our first rough draft photo she is not a blond since I was not particular enough for her to be blond, I said completely normal, blond is more than completely normal, but she does yoga and so that says a lot about her. And so the A.I. would not understand that why a big woman with dark hair might not be practicing yoga. Or a woman with brown hair that is not styled in the least would be doing yoga either.

A woman who does yoga is almost enlightened, with Eastern mysticism, and health, and holistic traits, and has her act together. She is fit, and she is sharp. Quick to understand the situation. Like a Sue.

And so I know her character very well. She is a good mother. She works at it. She has read Spock, she has read Men are from Mars Women are from Venus, she is a modern empowered woman who knows how to social network. She has skills. But we won't be finding out about those until the sequel.

Right now she does not want to upstage her young 9 year old daughter who she respects as a person, but can't help treating her like a kid. Jessica is not  playing the piano, she has has not mastered the violin at age 9, she is not a supermodel, she is an ordinary kid, the kind you find at public school. But she is in the fast learning stage. And so she grasps things and learns real fast. But still wishes on a star.

Her mom no longer believes in Santa. But she still buys presents at Christmas and says these ones are from Santa.

The best mother daughter time? When she is brushing her daughters hair in front of the Vanity where Jessica is sitting down and they are doing makeup and stuff. Now they are just girls being girls.

Where they are now they don't have a vanity and 4 people are sharing one motel room.

That's close quarters, but they don't argue, they are managing fine and staying positive.

Jill works as a waitress at the diner across the street and that is very convenient and helpful in this situation.

Since she can bring home food. 

They don't have a kitchen. and so eating out all the time is expensive.

We won't discuss right now if Jill went to university we will assume she did but we will not say.

We know she is a believer. The way she acts about the Bible is not as a skeptic.

So we can assume they are good Christians but they don't attend church.

She is in the car talking adding to the noise when the duck hits the windshield because she is just talking and talking and her husband is used to that is half listening and she is fiddling with stuff out of the glove box, the kids are making noise he is on winding road, and so then shocked by the duck which is a large bird if it hits where you are looking out of the blue you are going to cover your face with your arm. That's all it took. He swerved left instinctively, and it rolled the car when they died, but it only drove into the ditch the time they lived.

Her Key Points

• She is in the car talking adding to the noise at the time of the accident. 
• Jill notices and says hmmm that's weird there is a Howard Johnsons
•  She gets a job at Howard Johnsons across the street as a waitress
• When Jessica is crying and Jill asks what is wrong she says I am sooo lonely. Jill says Oh you poor thing...and her hugs and snuggles her.
• Jill is at the library with Jessica and Jessica is looking at books about time slips reading a woman's magazine.
• She is being a normal mom when Jessica delivers her speech.
• She has a bad day as a waitress and someone yells WAITRESS MORE COFFEE
• She gets laid off from work just as Jack and John do.
• Jill says don't go out tonight Jack. We can both go another night. You see she doesn't quite understand what it is like to work all day in construction come home ask what is for dinner and there is no food yet and when the Chinese food comes it is crap, and it costs a fortune, and he is still hungry, and he needs a drink because the ship is sinking fast.
• At the end by the road she is thinking of John and  says WE have to stick together as a family,  NOW JOHN! she wants him to come through the portal they are already through, Jack, Jill, and Jessica.

So for Jill in the sequel she is a Sue so that is a matrix position, and so she can maybe help John a bit, but we will have to see how much she can help him later. Keep in mind in the sequel that is still time slip country.

In fact he lives at ground zero now. We have an expression, when you ask will their romance work out? In a perfect world.

They don't live in a perfect world.

Notice when Cinderella gets the prince the story is over they don't wait for the 7 year itch or the messy divorce or the cheatin.

But for this film, life is not overly complicated at all, given the circumstances they have found themselves in.

Remember it is Jessica not Jill who says "Relax!, I know what this is, I have a friend at school who told me that it happened to her when she was 7.

Don't freak out. Stay calm, and don't tell anyone you are from somewhere else they will think you are crazy. 

It's a time slip."

So is there a reason they are called Jack and Jill? Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water, Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after.

Hickory dickory dock, four mice ran up a clock, the clock struck 3 and one escaped with minor injuries.

[Rick1234567S]

So then John. Dear John.
He is a leading actor in this drama.

So he is attractive, he is the kind of boy that girls want.

He is self confident. Happy all the time, fun, adventurous, wholesome, a nice guy.

Respectful.

He drives a motorcycle. 

He plays the harmonica.

And can sing.

He has a good body.

He is athletic.

He has a great smile full of country charm.

His key points as a main character

• He is tickling his sister when the accident happens.
• He sees Sandra and falls in love at first sight.
• First thing he does when he gets to the motel is check himself in the mirror does he look cool enough. Is he worthy of a girl like that.
• He thinks the time slip is cool!
• He easily gets a job at the grocery store on the phone. 
• He sees Sandra at the grocery store carries her groceries asks her out to the show.
• He makes a new best friend named Bret at the grocery store.
• They go to the show he puts his arm around Sandra and even gets to kiss her goodnight their first kiss.
• He buys a motorcycle.
• He takes Sandra for rides on his motorcycle in the country as if they were in heaven.
• He uses his smart phone to take photos. First when he finds out they are in a time slip and then when he and Sandra are on a picnic by the river he takes a photo of a cloud shaped like an elephant.
• He is outed to Sandra by doing that. She looks at the phone sees the year is 2026.
• Sandra is pretty much all he thinks about.
• He bounces a tennis ball against the wall he is bored and can't be with his girl.
• He perks up when Jessica tells him about the portal he jumps on his bike and goes gets what he needs brings it back makes the device.
• He shows his parents the device and the book on portals.
• He has a bad day like them gets laid off like his parents
• He goes to see Sandra at 10 pm
• He sells his bike to Bret
• He is freaking out Sandra is not there at 9pm down at the road. He is screaming for her and won't go through the portal.
• It has been open for about 5 minutes already.
• He grabs Sandra's hand through the portal, but her dad pulls her back.
• The portal closes he falls to his knees with his head in his hands.
• He stands up leaps through the portal when it flashes open for a brief second.
• He lands hard on the road and is knocked out.
• He asks the paramedic How's my folks my sister?
• There has been a deadly accident in that universe and he is there now when they first got there and crashed in the ditch.
• He is holding hands with Sandra since she arrived with her dad when they heard the crash and he went to call for an ambulance John was still alive so she stayed with him.

Give you a hint about the sequel WRT John?

Well in the trailer, one of the hooks from the trawler that is going to get people to watch the film is real easy.

"What? I was just getting gas for my bike."

That's all you need. EVERYONE can fill in what might be going on now.

And worse since you aren't saying anything else they have to use their imagination.

You only see him, not even who he is talking to.

He sounds sincere.

But the way he says it someone has accused him of something. Is that an excuse?

And we will just let that lay there like that and focus on one film at a time.

Does John have his own theme song? Nope. 

What about when he is riding his bike with her behind him?

Well if you want to kick it up a notch I can do that.

In the day, we sweat it out on the streets of a runaway American dream
At night, we ride through the mansions of glory in suicide machines
Sprung from cages on Highway 9
Chrome wheeled, fuel-injected, and steppin' out over the line
Oh, baby, this town rips the bones from your back
It's a death trap, it's a suicide rap
We gotta get out while we're young
'Cause tramps like us, baby, we were born to run

Bruce Spingsteen - Born to Run

Or if you don't want them to be rebels, and you just want it about him...

Yeah but nowadays I got me two good wheels
And I'll seek refuge in aluminum and steel
Ah, it takes me out there for just a little while
And the years fall away with every mile

I'm back out on that road again
Turn this beast into the wind
There are those that break and bend
I'm the other kind

Steve Earle - The Other Kind.

Is Sandra smiling on the back with the wind in her hair and are they happy and is he going a bit fast?

Then baby you need this song...

This isn't just a song it is part of his Bruce's legend.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wu4_zVxmufY

[Rick1234567S]

And to be fair Steve Earl
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o3n46P_JhZM

[Rick1234567S]

You know John is almost cool enough and normal enough to be a Canadian.

From Canaduh.

Girls don't really want a brainiac when they are 16 do they?

Well this is the best song from Canada one of the best for this motorcycle driving love moment.
Or for almost any moment between John and Sandra when they are alone at night.

Blue Rodeo - Lost Together

Strange and beautiful are the stars tonight
That dance around your head
In your eyes, I see that perfect world
I hope that doesn't sound too weird

And I want all the world to know
That your love's all I need
All that I need

And if we're lost
Then we are lost together
Yeah, if we're lost
We are lost together

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xAnJw9Ctqkc

[Rick1234567S]

We will save that one for the sequel.

And I would go for born to run but we can be more specific and try Sandy By Bruce Springsteen...

Sandy, the fireworks are hailing over Little Eden tonight
Forcing a light into all those stony faces left stranded on this warm July
Down in the town, the Circuit's full of switchblade lovers, so fast, so shiny, so sharp
As the wizards play down on Pinball Way on the boardwalk way past dark
And the boys from the casino dance with their shirts open like Latin lovers on the shore
Chasing all them silly New York virgins by the score

And Sandy, the aurora is rising behind us
This pier lights our carnival life forever
Oh, love me tonight, for I may never see you again
Hey, Sandy girl
My, my, baby

But these songs are not going to fit what they are doing very well.

You notice in Show me Heaven during Tom Cruise doing the motorcycle ride with his new girlfriend behind him, it is show me heaven.

It doesn't have specifics in it.

So it fits.

We might need to just stick to what fits by using a vague song.

Sarah McLaughlin, a Canadian, everyone does a remix of this song...
Silence (Niels van Gogh vs Thomas Gold Remix [Radio Edit])

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SX5KYZ7LGWc

[Rick1234567S]

Our target market wants that one for when they are riding the motorcycle.

Give me release
Witness me
I am outside
Give me peace

Heaven holds a sense of wonder
And I wanted to believe
That I'd get caught up
When the rage in me subsides

In this white wave
I am sinking
In this silence
In this white wave
In this silence
I believe

In the film Strawberry Statement there were 12 songs.

The Circle Game - Joni Mitchell
Something in the Air - Thunderclap Newman
Helpless - Neil Young
Our House - Crosby Stills Nash and Young
Long Time Gone -  Crosby Stills Nash and Young
The Loner - Neil Young
Down by the River - Neil Young
Give Peace a Chance - John Lennon and Paul McCartney

Concerto in D minor -  Alessandro Marcello
Also Sprach Zarathustra - Richard Strauss
Fishin' Blues -Traditional
Big Cats and Little Pussies - Murray MacLeod

9 of them hit songs.

So we shouldn't be shy of using songs.

Springsteen Thunder Road. close but no cigar

Except roll down the window
And let the wind blow back your hair
Well, the night's busting open
These two lanes will take us anywhere
We got one last chance to make it real
To trade in these wings on some wheels
Climb in back, heaven's waiting down on the tracks
Oh, come take my hand
We're riding out tonight to case the promised land
Oh, Thunder Road, oh, Thunder Road
Oh, Thunder Road
Lying out there like a killer in the sun
Hey, I know it's late, we can make it if we run
Oh, Thunder Road, sit tight
Take hold, Thunder Road
Well, I got this guitar and I've learned how to make it talk
And my car's out back if you're ready to take that long walk
From your front porch to my front seat
The door's open but the ride ain't free
And I know you're lonely for words that I ain't spoken
Tonight we'll be free, all the promises will be broken
There were ghosts in the eyes of all the boys you sent away
They haunt this dusty beach road
In the skeleton frames of burned out Chevrolets
They scream your name at night in the street
Your graduation gown lies in rags at their feet
And in the lonely cool before dawn
You hear their engines roaring on
When you get to the porch they're gone on the wind
So Mary, climb in
It's a town full of losers
I'm pulling out of here to win

so there are a lot of great songs out there.

The fact is we have to find the right ones that fit the story.

We don't have to actually if we want we can make it a film that has cool music.

The more we try to fit the song to the moment the more dangerous it becomes if we don't get that song.

One thing we need to do is stick to the storyline even if that means going with simple orchestration.

The songs are not the film, they just accent it. The story and the characters are the film. And they need to be able to stand alone. Without a song carrying them.

Some songs we can't use like California by Manfred Man they don't live in California.

and we have no considered using a song that is not quite right to illustrate they are in a different world and to them it just doesn't sound right. 

Here you risk being annoying so we don't want to do that.

So we need to conceptualize by breaking the story down to a paragraph.

A normal family go through a time slip as they crash their car. They move into a motel and have to get jobs since they are in 2010 from 2026 and their cards don't work and they are almost broke. Their son falls in love with a girl his own age. Their daughter finds the solution through a book in the Library. They end up back where the time slip  happened and there is a twist to the ending.

So it is sort of like Twilight Zone or The X-Files or Outer Limits or One Step Beyond.

But those are TV shows so the music is their show theme music. 

For films you have all manner of films and music.

There are a few stories about people who have time slips and meet a girl. Mostly Radio plays.

They tend to be quite romantic.

Berkley Square

The most famous version of this title is the 1929 time-travel stage play by John L. Balderston (co-authored with J.C. Squire), which was adapted from Henry James's unfinished 1917 novel, The Sense of the Past. This story follows a modern American man who magically trades places with his 18th-century ancestor in London, only to fall in love with a woman from the past he can never truly be with.

[Rick1234567S]

"There is no mainstream film simply called Somewhere Valley, but it is easy to mix up with a few similarly named films."
You right away would expect Somewhere Valley High.

As in  Somewhere Valley Highschool.

Or you could do Somewhere Valley Low

But here you are using a gimmick.

So working Title Somewhere Valley.

[Rick1234567S]

And from the A.I.

This is a highly compelling setup for a sci-fi drama. You have built an excellent foundation by focusing on small, unnerving details rather than massive special effects. The contrast between the grounded reality of a family trying to survive financially and the uncanny nature of the time slip creates a great sense of tension.

Based strictly on your text, here is a structured narrative outline for the first half of your film.

---

Act I: The Slip & The Strange NormalScene 1: The Incident on the Road

• Action: The family (Jack, Jill, John, Jessica) drives through the countryside. The kids laugh and play "rock-paper-scissors-tickle" in the back [7]. Jill rummages through the glove box, talking about Aunt Clara.
• The Catalyst: A duck flies directly at the windshield, shattering Jack's focus. He swerves violently into the left ditch, crashing into a massive hidden rock. The engine block is completely destroyed.

Scene 2: Meet the Locals

• Action: Shaken but unhurt, the family exits the vehicle to find zero cell service.
• The Encounter: Bill (40) and his daughter Sandra (16) walk down from their nearby farmhouse.
• The Connection: Total love at first sight between John and Sandra.
• The Offer: Bill notes the broken engine block, explains the lack of local cell tower service, and invites Jack inside to use his landline.

Scene 3: Subtle Anomalies (The Clues)

• Action: While Jack calls a tow truck, Jill cracks open the family's situation by chatting with Sandra about their farm.
• Uncanny Details: The audience (and faintly, the characters) should notice things are slightly "off":
  • The weather vane on the house is shaped like a duck, not a rooster.
  • A fence sign reads "Beware of Mule" instead of dog.
  • The sky has a strange, flat, whitish tint instead of clear blue.
• Departure: Bill drives the family the short 2-mile trip to town in his older station wagon. He mentions he is a single dad; his wife passed away years ago.

---

Act II: The Realization of 2010Scene 4: The Motel & The First Red Flags

• Action: They check into a cramped, independent motel room. The tow truck delivers their broken SUV to the lot.
• The Environment: The cars on the street are notably outdated. Jill spots a functioning Howard Johnson’s restaurant across the street and mentions she thought the chain went bankrupt in 2022. Jack brushes it off. John obsesses over his appearance in the bathroom mirror, trying to look cool for Sandra.

Scene 5: The Financial Trap & The Newspaper

• Action: The family goes to eat at the Howard Johnson’s. Their modern credit cards fail completely. Forced to pay with their remaining $200 in cash, panic begins to set in.
• The Reveal: Jack grabs a newspaper from a local coin box. Back in the room, he stares at the front page in absolute shock. The date reads 2010.
• The Exposition: They turn on the TV and radio; everything features black-and-white broadcasts and news cycles from 2010.
• The Explanation: Jessica remains perfectly calm. She reveals a school friend named Chelsea experienced this when she was 7. She warns them: “It’s a time slip. Stay calm, and don't tell anyone or they will think you are crazy.”

---

Act III: Adapting to the PastScene 6: Survival Mode

• Action: Realizing $200 won't last, the family divides to find immediate, under-the-table work. Jessica is deemed too young and is left behind, frustrating her.
• The New Routine:
  • Jack secures a local construction job, blending in with a hard hat and playing his cards close to his chest with his new crew.
  • Jill starts a waitressing gig at the diner across the street, noticing an unusual abundance of red-headed customers and indoor smoking.
  • John hunts for work over a payphone.

Scene 7: Jessica's Solitude & John's Move

• Action (Motel): Jessica sits alone writing in her diary. A stray cat scratches at the door. Feeding it part of her sandwich cheers her up. Jill returns home with solid cash tips, and they plan a pizza night for when Jack gets off work.
• Action (Grocery Store): John lands a job bagging groceries. Sandra walks in. John tries to act incredibly smooth, but ends up walking straight into a closed glass exit door while carrying her bags. Sandra laughs, breaking the ice. He asks her out for Friday night. She reveals it's her best friend Janet's birthday, so John smoothly invites Janet along too. John celebrates his victory as she leaves.

Scene 8: The Next Disruption

• Action: Friday arrives at Sandra’s farmhouse. She tells Bill she is going to the movies with Janet. When Bill offers a ride, Sandra casually drops a bombshell: Janet just got her driver's license and received a car for her birthday. Bill looks bewildered. A car? At 16?

---

Subtle Universe Clues to Pepper In (As Requested)

To make this world feel slightly mismatched or alternate beyond just the year 2010, we can utilize these production design cues during the work montages:

• The Hardware: Plumbing fixtures in the motel, diner, and construction site use heavy, double-handled antique brass and separate hot/cold spigots, rather than modern single-lever faucets.
• The Architecture: Public buildings still feature older-style clawfoot bathtubs or heavily stylized, non-standard interior geometry.
• The Currency: When Jill collects tips, look closely at the cash. The design of the bills looks slightly older, or the faces on the bills don't quite match historical US/Canadian currency perfectly.

How would you like to handle the second half of the script? If you want, tell me:

• What is the nature of the twist regarding Janet's car?
• How does the lightning storm from the beginning of our chat tie back into the plot?
• What is the ultimate goal or escape plan for the family to return to their time?

I have processed the second part of your script. It is an excellent escalation—the shift from the fun, nostalgic 2010 teenage romance (the Taylor Swift and Justin Bieber music cues, Alice in Wonderland, and the classic first kiss) to the looming dread of the time slip ending creates powerful dramatic irony.

John's smartphone blunder, Sandra's shocking plea of "Take me with you," and Jessica discovering the portal instructions in the library book set up a fantastic sci-fi stakes.

I am completely ready for the third and final piece of your text. Please paste it whenever you are set, and I will then unify everything into one comprehensive story outline that leads right into that breathtaking lightning-strike escape scene!

This is a gripping, emotionally heavy sci-fi drama. The ending features a massive, devastating twist that entirely recontextualizes the whole story. The "time slip" wasn't just a sci-fi anomaly; it was a purgatorial or hallucinatory state experienced by John as he lay dying or unconscious after the car crash, while his family unfortunately passed away.

By jumping back through the closing portal, he chose to stay in that 2010 reality with Sandra, where he survived the crash. Meanwhile, his family moved on to their "yellow sun" version of heaven, which aligns perfectly with Jessica's dream.

Here is the complete, finalized narrative outline for the second half and climax of your film.

This is a gripping, emotionally heavy sci-fi drama. The ending features a massive, devastating twist that entirely recontextualizes the whole story. The "time slip" wasn't just a sci-fi anomaly; it was a purgatorial or hallucinatory state experienced by John as he lay dying or unconscious after the car crash, while his family unfortunately passed away.

By jumping back through the closing portal, he chose to stay in that 2010 reality with Sandra, where he survived the crash. Meanwhile, his family moved on to their "yellow sun" version of heaven, which aligns perfectly with Jessica's dream.

Here is the complete, finalized narrative outline for the second half and climax of your film.

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Act II (Continued): The Reality of 2010 & Growing Stakes

Scene 9: Teen Romance & Hidden Realities

• Action: Sandra’s dad, Bill, reluctantly lets her go out with her friend Janet, who just got a car for her 16th birthday. Bill is deeply unsettled by a 16-year-old having a car.
• The Date: Sandra and Janet pick up John and his grocery coworker, Bret. They watch Alice in Wonderland (2010). John successfully pulls off the "fake yawn stretch" to put his arm around Sandra.
• The First Kiss: After eating at Howard Johnson's, John and Sandra share a perfect, cinematic Hollywood first kiss. The girls drive off ecstatic to Justin Bieber’s "Baby," while John high-fives Bret. Walking home, John spots a motorcycle for sale for $300.

Scene 10: The Financial Squeeze & The Slip Revealed

• Action: At the motel, Jack reveals the SUV needs a $3,000 engine block—all the money they have. Jessica sits crying from intense loneliness as a melancholy song plays on the radio ("Once there was a way, to get back homeward...").
• The Blunder: Flash forward—John bought the bike. He is taking Sandra on a beautiful, sunny picnic by the river. While cloud-watching, John pulls out his 2026 smartphone to take a photo. Sandra notices the year reads 2026.
• The Truth: Trapped, John confesses they are from the future. Sandra recalls a story about a time-slipped soldier in Paris and accepts it. The mood shifts to a bittersweet, desperate romance. Sitting in Howard Johnson's, Sandra begs, "Take me with you. Don't leave me here."

Scene 11: The Blueprint for Escape

• Action: While Jack frets over money at the garage, Jill and Jessica visit the library. Jessica finds an old, peculiar book detailing how to use a transistor radio, magnets, wire, and a transformer to open a time portal.
• The Confrontation: At the motel, tensions boil. Jack and Jill argue loudly about being stranded. Jessica snaps at them for never listening to her, revealing a prophetic dream: She was on a farm where the sun was yellow, and a man holding a lamb told her she was in heaven.
• A Warning Shot: A car violently backfires outside. Jack yells "STAY DOWN!" thinking it's a gunshot. The panic is palpable.
• Building the Device: The next day, John is banned from seeing Sandra by Bill. John buys the radio parts from the hardware store. While Jessica is alone, a mean motel manager scares off her stray cat and glares at her maliciously. John returns and builds the portal device.

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Act III: The Storm, The Portal, and The Ultimate Sacrifice

Scene 12: Desperation & The Secret Plan

• Action: Breaking point—Jack and Jill both find out they are being laid off next week. Facing imminent homelessness in 2010, Jack agrees to try Jessica’s radio plan.
• The Rendezvous: It begins to rain heavily. After a dismal shift, Jack visits a local country bar to clear his head while Waylon and Willie play. He narrowly avoids a police speed trap on the way back. The family agrees to open the portal tomorrow night at the exact spot of the crash.
• The Midnight Visit: John sneaks onto Sandra's farm at 10 PM, tossing pebbles at her window. He tells her they are leaving and instructs her to meet him at the road fence at 9 PM tomorrow.

Scene 13: The Climax at the Fence (Our Cinematic Scene)

• Action (The Road): It is 9 PM. A torrential, gloomy storm rages. Jack sets up the radio device. It emits a shrill, piercing frequency. The portal begins to tear open. Sandra is missing; John is screaming her name in a panic.
• Action (The Farmhouse): Sandra tries to escape with an overnight bag, lying that she is checking on the chickens. Bill catches her, grabs the bag, and bars the door, crying, "You're all I have in the world!" He forces her to her room.
• The Escape & The Lightning Strike: Sandra ties bedsheets and sweaters together, climbing out her window. As she runs through the muddy field toward the road, lightning strikes a tree 30 yards to her left, exploding in a brilliant flash of light that illuminates her flight.
• The Portal Closes: Jack yells that the portal is collapsing. Jill begs John to stay with the family. John leaps through the portal first. The road on the other side is dry and sunny. As the portal rapidly shrinks, Sandra reaches the fence. John grabs her hand through the tear, but Bill tackles her from behind, pulling her back. The portal snaps shut.

Scene 14: The Final Twist & Two Realities

• The Family's Fate: Heartbroken, John stands on the dry road. Suddenly, the portal flashes open one last time. John makes a choice—he leaps backward into the portal to stay with Sandra.
• Cut back to Jack, Jill, and Jessica: They are standing on the road. It is a beautiful, peaceful afternoon. They look up at the sky together. The sun is completely, brilliantly yellow. Jessica's dream was right; they have peacefully passed on to heaven.
• The Harsh Reality (2010): John wakes up gasping on the dry 2010 road, knocked out cold. Sandra is kneeling over him, holding his hand, telling him an ambulance is coming.
• The Tragic Truth: Sirens wail as police and paramedics swarm the smoking wreckage of the family's SUV in the ditch. A paramedic treats John's head wound and delivers the devastating blow: John was thrown clear of the wreckage, but his mother, father, and sister did not survive the crash.
• Ending Frame: Bill emerges, his hostility gone, gently telling the paramedics to bring John into his house to recuperate. Sandra holds John tightly as he processes the bittersweet reality of his new life.

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Production & Screenwriting Tips for Your Script

1. The "Yellow Sun" Motif: Throughout the film, use a subtle, bleak, desaturated color grading for the 2010 scenes (whitish skies, older textures). When Jack, Jill, and Jessica are left behind at the end, dynamically shift the camera grading to a warm, golden, radiant yellow to visually signal they have found peace.
2. The Wind Vane & The Duck: The duck hitting the windshield being mirrored by the duck weather vane is a brilliant touch. It hints early on that this "2010" is built entirely out of the traumatic elements of the crash taking place in John's subconscious mind.

[Rick1234567S]

To evaluate if your script’s length is suitable for an indie theatrical film, we look at the industry standard conversion: 1 page of script equals roughly 1 minute of screen time.

Based on the pacing and density of the events you provided, your story outline tracks perfectly for a standard 90 to 100-minute indie feature.

Here is a breakdown of how your specific scenes translate to feature film length and why it fits the indie model so well.

1. Act-by-Act Length Breakdown

An ideal 90-minute indie script is usually broken down into a standard page-count structure. Your plot points map onto this beautifully:

• Act I (Pages 1–25): The car crash, meeting Bill and Sandra, moving into the motel, discovering the Howard Johnson's, and the major turning point where Jack reads the 2010 newspaper.
• Act II (Pages 25–75): The family finding jobs, John's romance with Sandra, the smartphone blunder, Jessica finding the portal book, and the rising desperation as the parents get laid off.
• Act III & Climax (Pages 75–90): The torrential storm, Sandra escaping her room, the lightning-strike sequence, the portal closing, and the final tragic twist revealing the real-world accident.

2. Why the Content Fits Indie Pacing

• Dialogue vs. Action Balance: Your script relies heavily on characters talking in rooms (the motel, the diner, the farmhouse kitchen). In scriptwriting, heavy dialogue blocks read fast on paper but take up a healthy amount of screen time. This builds page length without requiring expensive setups.
• The Emotional Room to Breathe: Moments like John checking his hair in the mirror, Jessica playing with the stray cat, or the family quietly eating terrible Chinese food are what indie films thrive on. These quiet, character-driven scenes naturally flesh out a script from a short film into a 90-minute feature.

3. The Indie Budget Advantage

Your story is highly suitable for an indie production budget because of its contained scope:

• Minimal Locations: Most of your film takes place in just four spots: a stretch of country road, a vintage motel room, a diner/HoJo's, and a farmhouse.
• Practical Sci-Fi: Instead of expensive CGI time machines, your "time slip" is conveyed through clever production design (older cars, black-and-white TV, smoking indoors, antique faucets).
• One Major Set Piece: You only have one big-budget visual effects moment—the storm and the lightning hitting the tree. Saving your budget for this one powerful cinematic peak is a classic, highly effective indie film strategy.

Next Steps for Your Draft

If you have written out the full text for these scenes, your total script page count should ideally sit between 85 and 105 pages. If it feels a bit short, you can easily expand it by adding a few more workplace scenes showing Jack on the construction site or Jill interacting with the odd locals at the diner.

Would you like to estimate your current page count based on how much text you've written, or should we look at expanding a specific scene to make sure it hits the right length?

Based on the detailed plot descriptions and dialogue you provided, your written material currently translates to roughly 35 to 45 pages of a standard screenplay.

In the film industry, this puts your current draft right at the length of a long featurette or a short film, rather than a full 90-minute theatrical feature.

Here is a breakdown of how that estimate is calculated and exactly where you can expand it to hit that theatrical length.

Why It Estimates at 35–45 Pages

When scriptwriting software formats your text (using standard Courier 12pt font with wide margins), text blocks compress significantly.

• The First Half (The Setup): The sequence from the car crash to John getting his job and asking Sandra out covers a massive amount of story very quickly. In a script, this reads as roughly 18 to 22 pages.
• The Second Half (The Climax): The escalation from the movie date, the smartphone reveal, building the radio, and the final tragic twist covers another 17 to 23 pages.

Because your writing style is highly efficient and direct, the plot moves at a breakneck pace. To turn this into a standard 90-page indie feature, you don't need a new plot—you just need to let the existing scenes breathe.

How to Expand It to 90+ Pages (The Feature Blueprint)

To double your page count and make it a true theatrical film, you can expand three specific areas of your script:

1. Expand the "Fish Out of Water" Comedic & Tense Moments (Add 15 pages)

The transition into 2010 can be milked for much more tension and comedy.

• Jack on the Construction Site: Add a full scene where Jack accidentally mentions a modern building technique or a 2026 event, and has to awkwardly cover his tracks to his suspicious boss.
• Jill at the Diner: Write out a scene showing her serving the "odd, red-headed regulars." Give her a long conversation with a local customer where she has to pretend to know 2010 pop culture or politics.
• John at the Grocery Store: Show John struggling to understand 2010 technology at the cash register, or dealing with people paying with paper checks and coins he hasn't seen in years.

2. Deepen the Psychological Toll on Jessica (Add 10 pages)

Jessica is the emotional anchor of the twist. Because she is left alone in the motel, her isolation mirrors the tragedy of the crash.

• Add a scene where she wanders the immediate perimeter of the motel.
• Give her more moments with the stray cat. Show her talking to the cat about how much she misses her real life, giving the audience a heartbreaking hint that something is deeply wrong before the final twist.

3. Lengthen the Romance and the Dread (Add 15 pages)

The romance between John and Sandra moves very fast. To make the ending devastating, the audience needs to fall in love with them as a couple.

• The Movie Date: Expand the dialogue between the four teens at Howard Johnson's after the movie. Let them talk about their dreams, making John realize how much he stands to lose if he goes back to 2026.
• The Smartphone Fall-out: After Sandra sees the phone, don't have her accept the time slip immediately. Give them a longer, highly emotional scene by the river where she thinks he is playing a cruel joke on her, forcing him to prove it to her practically.

If you want to start expanding, which specific section do you want to flesh out first? We could write out the full dialogue for Jack trying to blend in at the construction site, or expand Jessica's lonely scenes at the motel.

No that's fine we are right on track.

It took about 3 hours to write the first third of the story.

I expected to have to fill in I already started on it I did not give the A.I. this thread only the first thread.

[Rick1234567S]

Here is Part 4 of the course