Edward McSweegan's chronic stalking and harassment of Lyme victims; I'll just keep posting this stuff so the nations can see that the US "government" does not support democracy or civil rights or justice in any shape or form.

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Subject: Edward McSweegan's chronic stalking and harassment of Lyme
victims

Date: Jan 26, 2008 11:46 AM

(LINK BELOW POSTED BY A HARASSED LYME VICTIM)

I'll just keep posting this stuff so the nations can see that the US
"government"
does not support democracy or civil rights or justice in any shape or
form. That
way next time Bushie says he needs to force democracy down everyone's
throats
by murdering a million of their people (Iraq), people will know that
not only is
Bushie a psychopath, but so are all of "law enforcement," since they
fail
to protect us, the chronic victims of crime.

I'll keep posting this with all the names of the above copied in, so
that in
the end we can say, "A MILLION TIMES, we complained to the proper
'authorities,'
and these incompetent 'law enforcement' or 'elected representative'
idiots did nothing to protect us." And it won't be an exaggeration.

http://id50.blogspot.com is NIH's resident psychopath's, Crazy Eddie
McSweegan's:
http://www.actionlyme.org/McSweegan.htm

This is harassment and terrorizing Lyme victims, something everyone's
known
has gone on since 1995, when the Forschners went through it with
McSweegan and Fish:
http://www.actionlyme.org/McSweegan_Relentless.htm
http://www.actionlyme.org/TICK_BITE_CONSPIRACY.htm

Gimme a break about the damned illegal spying on Americans, already.
These Lyme
criminals are murderers and have been committed crimes against us
directly and individually
for over 10 years, but the dogs and piggies of duh FBI, duh DOJ, and
duh cops can't
tale their eyes off their porn monitors, or bagging the whistleblowers
of the corporate
criminals, because they're too stupid to know they're being used.

Like Heiney Kissinger said of the military:
"Military men are dumb, stupid animals to be used as pawns for foreign
policy."
Woodward and Bernstein The Final Days in chapter 14

==========

http://groups.google.com/group/sci.med.diseases.lyme/browse_frm/thread/5828160ad2af9e5d/8d273c7f0c484c9a?hl=en#8d273c7f0c484c9a

This is the same website that has the rogue gallery of LLMDs and I had
never seen that website before. I am very upset-

For the first time 10 minutes ago I became aware of a page that not
only disses all Lymies but singles me out and then does worse. On the
old sci.med there was ANOTHER Sarah, her posting name was simply,
Sarah. She was Sarah Ellen if I remember right. She was not I. I
was, at the time, account Sarah_Weiss and email AramSa...@cs.com. You
can see her email, check it, it is NOT ME. I did write the suggestion
as follows re getting antibiotics from teh feed store but then the
malicious author of this page links to an old post of Sarahs and mixes
us up. ANYONE who knows me would know this is not me for several
reasons-

A. I didn't have bipolar diagnosis

B. I didn't attempt suicide and end up in a psyche ward

C. I was raised in a different STATE with a different life entirely
and

D. my father was deceased by the time I got a drivers license

E. I was never in Fallons study, never broke my leg, never WROTE
THAT!! AGH!!!

F. I didn't get tick bite when I was 8, etc.

But this page is a MALICIOUS attempt to defame me and I have to say, I
am shaking and upset.
I don't know how long it has been up. I am consulting a lawyer- my
brother and sister-in-law, Uncle and Aunt are all lawyers- and am
very deeply offended by this. This site is horrible, horrible and
this write-up is a clear intent to defame me- using a mental health
history that is NOT MINE.

Sincerely,
Sarah
who has NEVER BROKEN HER LEG, who was raised all over the place but
never New York, whose father was very dead by the time I had a car,
who NEVER attempted suicide to be placed in a psyche hospital and who
WAS evaluated by a psychiatrist when I didn't get 100% in 30 days of
abx and who was found to be mentally NORMAL

http://id50.blogspot.com/2008/01/lymees-hard-to-kill-harder-to.html

And then there's some barnyard advice from another long-time Lyme nut:

It is what I would do if I didn't have a doctor!
* feed stores- tell them you have a goat that weighs as much as you
do!!!
* animal abx from online

I wonder what kind of doctor this poor wrecked creature has these
days? Some quack LLMD or perhaps a New Age California guru? From her
own tedious online confessions one learns that she attempted suicide
several years ago after her parents threatened to take away her car
and access to the Internet. ("When I was in the hospital after the
suicide attempt I was in the psych ward. [F]or any who don't know, it
is a locked wing of the hospital...." Thanks. We might have guessed as
much.) Despite--as she claims--watching her parents reduced to tears
over her and having doctors tell her to her face that she was nuts,
she seems to have abandoned a credible diagnosis of bipolar disorder
in favor of a self-diagnosis of a permanent tick-borne infection, and
abandoned useful neuropsychiatric medications for all the antibiotics
she can get her hands on. Probably that includes goat antibiotics.

By herself, this person would be just one more tragic tale of one more
misguided fool avoiding reality and a chance at a relatively normal
and healthy life. But the greater tragedy is her relentless presence
on the Internet, giving unsought advice to equally confused and
ignorant people; and providing blithe, pseudo-intellectual
interpretations of medical and scientific findings, of which she has
absolutely no understanding. The depth of her ignorance and the scope
of her mindless commentary are breathtaking. If only her parents had
managed to cut off her access to the Internet!

UNQUOTE- and the words in the above- "suicide attempt" are linked to
THIS post which was by the OTHER Sarah NOT ME!!! If it was ME there
would have been *)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have always written that way-*!*)!
*)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

She just uses a ~Sarah and at the time I ALWAYS signed off Sarah*) If
you know me, read this, this is NOT my life.

AGH!!!!!!!!AS FOLLOWS- the other Sarah (who was really nice but it's
HER life NOT MINE!!! I HAVE MY OWN LIFE!)

Message from discussion Kids LD & brains (looong), Qs for Sarah, was
Re: one more story

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Sarah View profile
More options Oct 19 1999, 11:00 pm

Newsgroups: sci.med.diseases.lyme
From: "Sarah" <scon...@bestweb.net>
Date: 1999/10/20
Subject: Re: Kids LD & brains (looong), Qs for Sarah, was Re: one more
story
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ok first off here I'd just like to start by saying that getting my
story out
like this does make me happy. Why? you may ask? Well there is a
singer/songwriter that has impacted my life very much. Her name is
Ani
Difranco. One of her lyrics that sticks out to me here that puts the
perfect words to what I am trying to say is; "I hope somewhere some
woman
hears my music and it helps her through her day.." Now put lymie in
there
instead of woman and maybe you can understand why I am sharing so much
of my
story.

ok now on to the answers lol. I was actually a part of one of Dr.
Fallon's
studies, he is a brilliant man! (I can find out the exact name of the
one I
was a part of if you'd like) I think my family has a lot to do with
why I
am so strong and well grounded so far. They really have been some of
the
only ones fighting for me here so I do have to give them a lot of
credit. I
do have my moments of insanity, as every true lymie does. There are
days I
cry for hours wondering why I am fighting so hard for something no one
can
prove to me will ever end. I cry about that a lot. I sit and cry
about how
emotionally detached from the world I find myself getting.

-------
You thank your psychologist for keeping you sane. What does he do
that
helps you? How is he different from the psychs that DIDN'T help
you?
I think the main thing he does is admits he doesn't know everything,
to me
that's key to any doctor I'm with though. I had been to a few before
him
and one thing I've noticed about myself that I've kinda analyzed
myself(though could just all be my views here) is that as a lymie I'm
as bad
at manipulating people as addicts are. It's sad in many ways I guess,
but
helped me weed out psychs lol. I've noticed most try to make you
feel
smaller, or worse than them for even being there. That's not what's
going
to help a young person with lyme. Especially ones that have gone
misdx'ed
for so long. I think that's what made me into such a good
manipulator.
(it's
a harsh word but I can't think of a better one) I learned at a young
age
that the only way to get through life is to be just like everyone
else, the
more you say you are sick the more they don't believe you.. the sicker
you
look the more questions people ask. I don't know about any of you as
lymies
but I just have an urge to slap people who ask how I'm feeling.. or
that say
"oh you look so much better" .. I know these people don't mean
anything by
it and don't know any better.. but I still get frustrated. So I've
learned
how to not look sick and to keep my complaining(to people outside my
family)
to a bare minimum.
What else helps me? well the music I listen to plays a big role of
keeping
me sane, as does the internet. I have been on the internet as long as
I've
known I had lyme.. for a while they tried to say I had an internet
addiction
and it was harmful to my health.. blah blah blah. The don't
understand what
this does for me. This lets me get out how I feel and not have people
laugh.
this lets me think out what I want to say so I can get it right. Now
more
than ever this is the one of the only ways I get to keep in contact
with all
my friends.. with all the ones that have gone off to college.. even
the
friends down the street. Art is another thing that helps me. Art is
so
important to kids.. it lets them express how they feel even when they
can't
put words to it.. I could go on for hours about this but this is
already
long enough lol.
As for the abx, you will hear a very biased side of the argument from
me.. I
can only tell MY experiences though. So far every medication I have
ever
been on has just made me worse in the long run. They've tried pretty
much
everything. Here I'll try to list as much as I can remember: doxy,
IV
primaxin, IV rocephin, IV claforan, zithromax, ceftin, amoxacillin,
mepron,
relafen, percoset, vicodin, zoloft, effexor, nortriptyline, ambien,
adderol,
antivert, zofran... and more I just can't think of right now. half of
those
are meds for reactions I had to meds.. it's all just craziness, there
have
been SO many times I have just wanted to give up, and have. I still
try new
things though. Next on the list is Merrem. If you want to know about
all
the medical stuff.. I am known and feared by the medical world for my
odd
reactions to everything lol. Primaxin worked in the sense that I got
o
violent herx once, but thanks to the lovely insurance companies we
never
really knew what would have happened if I stayed on it much longer.
How do I help myself?
Art. I guess that's how I could sum it up in one word. From
listening to
music, painting, watching movies, writing, drawing, cooking.. you name
it..
anything I can express myself with non-verbally I do. This is also
how I
think we can help more kids with lyme. When I was in the hospital
after the
suicide attempt I was in the psych ward.. for any who don't know, it
is a
locked wing of the hospital where you have a dorm type room you share
and
are put through all different forms of therapy all day. I was
reluctant to
it all at first for obvious reasons.. but I slowly got into it..
group
therapy and art therapy are what worked wonders on me. The group
therapy
was nice because it wasn't just lyme patients. While it's nice to
talk to
people who know the pain.. but it's also important to see how people
cope
with life in general.

Was it that you couldn't find the word you wanted, or did
you get the words in the wrong order, or use wrong words or what?
Is there an all of the above here? lol it was a kind of process, I
would
know exactly what I wanted to say, I'd have the perfect words in my
head..
then when it came time for me to speak I would forget the words, then
the
ones I would use I would jumble and I would put them in the wrong
order.
Now I find myself using the wrong word a lot.. not on purpose but I
think
the word and say something different.. it's an odd feeling.

were there any kinds of tests, any particular subjects or school-
related
tasks,
that were harder for you than others -- especially early on? If so,
did the pattern change over time?
I have had extensive neuropsych testing done by a local (and
brilliant)
neuropsycholgist here. She found I have cognitive impairments.
Mainly with
memory and recall.. stuff like that (if you want me to get more into
detail
just let me know I can find the report and e-mail you with what she
exactly
found) As for what I saw as impairments when it came to neuro stuff
looking
back at my life with lyme? I remember studying as hard as I could
for
things then drawing blanks when it came time to answer anything. I
don't
know if it was this or the lyme.. or a combination of that cause it
but over
the years my motivation has dropped out of sight. I don't have any
anymore.
Lately I've just been too sick to do anything.. but even when I'm
better..
and all through elementary school I just didn't want to do anything (I
think
I've seen it posted on here as "can't do anythingitus" lol)
The lack
of
motivation is the only thing that has stayed pretty much constant.

My Lyme brain really gets in my way, but, being as I'm on the verge
of
old, I'm always aware how many years I've had to enjoy having it work
just fine.
This whole paragraph here of yours has struck something in me. I love
to
learn. I always have. I have always loved the start of school.. the
thought of learning so much just amazes me! I always wonder what I'm
going
to be when I get older.. what will be my niche? I wish I could stay
in a
class long enough to find out what I even like to do. It's scaring me
now
that I'm getting older and I don't see an end here. I love
psychology ..
but I wonder how I've learned so much about it, I haven't even made
it
through a semester of classes. If I'm just loving it because I have
been
through so much I wonder where I'd be if I'd never gotten sick. I am
not a
religious person if anything I consider myself Taoist because those
are the
only set of beliefs I've seen where so many match mine (i.e. in order
to be
truly happy you must have felt true sadness, in order to be well you
must be
sick, etc.)
All throughout this I have thought I was the most sane person in the
world..
that I'm just misunderstood. Actually as weird as it may sound I
have
always thought of everyone else to be less sane than me.. odd I know..
I
don't think I can even explain that one. A psychiatrist once told me
he
thinks lyme makes people developmentally younger than they are. This
upset
me to no end. Still does irk me a bit... I guess now in retrospect I
can
see where he was coming from, but in my eyes I think this disease has
made
me grow up so much faster. Between feeling the actual pain, seeing
how the
corporate insurance companies just work to screw us over, watching my
parents be reduced to tears over me,(and still stayed together through
it
all) Having doctors tell me to my face I'm nuts.. with everything I
feel so
much older. I even find myself not able to talk to people my age as
well as
I can to people much older. This disease gives you quite a good BS
detector.
I am interested in everything.. I used to LOVE science.. I loved
taking
things apart, but now not being able to remember how to put them back
together poses a bit of a problem lol. I also loved to read as a
child.. I
still do, but it takes me forever to finish a book now. I don't have
and
concentration anymore, again maybe it's the lyme, maybe it's being a
teenager... but nothing seems to hold my interest anymore.(you'd never
guess
by the length of this response eh? lol) The one thing that I haven't
lost
is my curiosity. I still want to know everything!! (if you have a
teenager
you'll know getting us to admit we don't already know everything is a
feat
in itself lol)

You mention loving drama. Why? What did you love about it?
Simply because I was able to be someone else. No one looked at me as
the
little sick girl. I was the character. Suprisingly I didn't have
much
trouble learning lines... getting into character was easy for me, the
lines
just flowed. I wanted to be an actress for a really long time
actually.
Another Ani Difranco quote snapped me out of that though.. "everyone
is an
actor or an actor's best friend. Tell me when it got so bad that we
all
have to pretend." It just rings so true.
What else do I love to do?
Again, any type of art. I love to watch movies, new and old..
especially
independent movies. I love learning about other people. I love
seeing how
other people think, how they react.. why they are who they are. If I
ever
had a wish it would be to walk a day in someone else's shoes.. to see
life
through their eyes. That's where the independent movies come in...
they
have the least room between the writers/filmmakers head and what the
audience sees.. I love that. I don't know how that relates to lyme.
but who
knows.

I was afraid I wouldn't be
"me" anymore. did you ever feel that way, Sarah? Was there a
moment
when you just *knew* something was wrong with your brain?
Honestly, I don't really see anything "wrong" with my brain. This
is
me, I
have been this way for most of what I can remember. I know I have
brain
damage, I know I have things physically wrong with me. I just think
this is
me, it wouldn't be me without all of it. I can't do anything to
change it.
I also don't think I'd like myself any other way. Whenever I tell
people I
have brain damage they let out a gasp or tell me how sorry they are
for me.
I just look in their eyes and wonder if I hadn't told them if they
would
have noticed anything at all. Even if they knew me my whole life. As
for a
moment when I knew.. I don't think so like I said, I've been this way
for as
long as I really remember I don't know how to do anything
differently.

I got the impression from your story that your brain stuff was
almost
too subtle to notice until you got mono. Is that true? Do you know
what tests it was that were positive, how they were sure it was
mono?
I guess I didn't make it too clear here, I'm sorry for that. When
they
tested me for lyme they also tested me for EB(mono). The tests showed
that
I had already had mono(around December of 96 we think) and that my
lyme
titers were positive. We didn't know I had brain damage until I had
my
first Brain spect scan and saw Dr. Fallon for that study. I probably
wouldn't know I have brain damage without people telling me, for the
sheer
fact (as I said above) that I don't really remember life without the
brain
damage. Though sadly the tests do show the legions on my brain and
the
constricted blood flow to my brain are getting worse. One thing I
found
interesting when I saw a cardiologist for the first time today(this is
a lil
off-topic here, sorry) was that he said my brain damage could be
causing me
to have low blood pressure at certain times of the day(something about
it
effecting the part of my brain that effects the regulation of blood
pressure) and that that is what could be causing my reversed sleep
patterns.. will be interesting to find out if this is true. (having a
tilt
table test next month)

any other co-infections?
Actually at different points in time I have tested for both babesia
and
erlichia(sp?) I took my 3 week round of mepron/zithro and it seemed
to make
the positive test results go away but sadly not the symptoms. Sadly
the
zithro caused SEVERE GI problems(as everything seems to with me, but
this
time it landed me in the hospital) Other than all known strains of
lyme
this seems to be it so far. We're not sure, nor have we ever looked
into,
if I ever really had mono.. or if lyme makes it positive.. who
knows?! lol

He's also said (in an LDF talk, I think) that LOTS of kids with Lyme
encephalopathy (was it half?) admit to suicidal thoughts, with some
horrifying percentage actually giving it a try.
I never knew he said all of this! It's odd, yet weirdly reassuring,
that I
was right about the impulsivity. I had never admitted to suicidal
thoughts.. never even to myself.. I was always the biggest anti-
suicide
person you could find. They are right for me about saying the one's
who
talk about it are USUALLY not the ones to do it. No one expected this
from
me, not even myself.

again, if you made it to the end of this, congrats! lol.. and Jean,
please,
please feel free to ask anything you'd like here or in private e-
mail.. if
you want anything more detailed just ask, my mom is meticulous about
keeping
all my records so I can look up anything you might need!
~Sarah