I spent the better part of last week in close examination of the
process I am going through in learning the "Making and Keeping
Appointments Online" project.
I began by making an ordinal list of all of the steps that are
normally taken when arranging an appointment. I thought that it would
be a very short list. Was I in for a surprise! Here is the list I came
up with:
Ask for the appointment
Agree to meet
Discuss the purpose
Look at optional times to meet - (Online appointments involve a whole
separate skill of transposing time zones so I suggest a "Clocks and
Time" workshop be integrated into "Arranging Appointments.)
Discuss possible contingencies
Discard unsuitable options
Limit the options
Choose and agree upon a time
Tentative dates
Log the time of appointment on calender
Confirm the time
Contact through contingencies, postponements and cancellations
Call ahead to reaffirm the appointment
Change appointment if necessary
Prepare for the appointment
Get there early
Keep the appointment on time!
Then I thought about how I acquired these skills and I was even more
surprised at how long it took me to learn all of this! I think back to
the first appointments I ever made in my professional life. What
disasters! I had never been in a club or had any formal training so I
just had to pick it up, bit by bit. Here is my story.
I had been making appointments for a little while. I would get the
appointment and remember it. As you can guess I was not very
dependable. I made it to some and missed others. I began getting more
and more appointments which vied for my attention and that made it
hard to remember my ever increasing appointments.
Then I made an appointment with a prominent lawyer on the phone, and
missed it. About a week later I bumped into this person accidentally
and thought about the appointment. I thought "Good! Now we can make
that appointment again!" So I said "Hi. We still need to meet!" It
shocked me when he said "I wouldn't let you water my lawn!" and walked
away from me.
That night my Fairy Godmother came in a dream and said "An appointment
is your word."
"I thought that I could remember my appointments."
"Make a note of each appointment."
OK, so I did that. I wrote the appointments down and I improved at
keeping my appointments. This was a period of weeks of learning.
One day I met an important new client on our second appointment. I got
there and he grumbled "Why can't people be on time?" I was late.
That night my Fairy Godmother came to me in a dream and said,
"You need to make those appointments on time! People start wondering
whether you're going to be there about an hour before the appointment.
How can anyone have faith in you if you don't do what you say you will
do? You should be thinking about each appointment an hour beforehand.
And instead of being on time, get there at least 5 minutes early."
That seemed like a good idea. So I vowed to always get to an
appointment well in advance. To accomplish this purpose I made a habit
of previewing my appointments regularly. I would review the coming
months, weeks, days and hours. I learned to preview every evening and
every morning. But this habit took time and effort also.
One day I was on my way to an appointment and got a flat tire! I was
out messing with my tire and missing my appointment.
That night my Fairy Godmother comes to me and was she pissed!
"Where's that money you owe me?" she demanded.
She had been charging me for this counsel and I had gotten behind on
my bill. You see, I planned to pay my bill with the money I would
receive at the missed appointment. I was going to make my defense when
she interrupted me...
"Don't tell me. You missed an appointment." as she knocked me upside
the head with a thimble.
"Yeah. But I had a flat tire. How was I going to get there?" I said.
"Contingencies" she fired back "You must plan for contingencies!" she
roared.
"Yeah, but I called and changed the appointment for tomorrow" I said.
Suddenly her fiery visage calmed and she said, "That's good because
it's not bad and that's a good thing!"
Within a few years, I had built an excellent reputation as being very
dependable and people were referring me for my integrity. I owe it all
to the people who complained about me and to my Buddy, who helped me
in my purpose.
I went on repeating my training in this skill for three years and
thought I had it down pat, but still I needed to learn more. One day I
had a pack of appointments to keep. On the way out that morning I saw
a friend and pulled over to chat. I could spare a few minutes because
I always left for my appointments super early.
"Hey! What are you doing?" I yelled out my car window.
"Nothing. I got the day off!"
"Why don't you come with me today. I want to show you what I do on a
normal day."
"Great!"
So off we went to my first appointment, who didn't show up!
So we spent the hour drinking coffe and chatting while waiting to go
to my second appointment. That one went without a hitch and so on
through the day. My friend was happy to spend this time with me
because it added another dimension to our friendship.
The afternoon was wearing and we go to one of my final stops. The
client didn't show!
"Well. Let's get a coffee." My friend didn't mind but I sure did.
"These people are messing my day up!! I said
"Maybe a good idea would be to call in advance and reaffirm the
appointment?" my friend suggested, "especially new clients whom you
have not yet established well enough."
That made sense. It takes a couple of appointments to establish trust.
Now, in cases where trust is not yet established, I always call in
advance to be sure we are on. That way I don't spin my wheel over them
like people spun their wheels with me before I learned to respect an
appointment.
But look how much coordination is involved in such a simple skill!
Here it was three years after beginning to learn the skills of making
and keeping appointment and I was still having to develop better
habits. Three years to learn how to keep appointments?! Maybe you are
a quick learner, but still, it takes months, maybe a year or two to
become coordinated in this one simple communication art!
If there is any one skill that I am going to walk out of this FOC08
course with, it's the simple skills of being able to tell online time
and arrange online appointments. I am looking for Buddies who will
support me in my efforts. I am interested in making an appointment for
a complete tour of your FOC blog. Or just to talk about the FOC
course.
And my Fairy Godmother? What happened to her? Well, she ran off with a
gambler from Las Vegas and I haven't heard from her since.
Moral of the Story: These are simple skills. Maybe you are tempted to
laugh at such trivial matters, but the fact is that though we may be
skilled at telling offline time and in arranging offline appointments,
we may be very unskilled in telling online time and arranging online
appointments.
On Aug 28, 4:34 pm, artie <
artistsforanar...@gmail.com> wrote:
> UPDATE:
>
> OK. I think I have made a tiny bit of progress on this. Illya called
> for a "meeting". I turned it into a personal "appointment" with Illya.
> But I never even asked Illya for theappointment. So Illya had no idea
> that we even had anappointment. I think that's where I went wrong.
> After that, it was all downhill. :(
>
> On Aug 28, 3:12 pm, artie <
artistsforanar...@gmail.com> wrote:
>
>
>
> > I have a problem over here and am trying to figure it out. My objective in
> > this thread is not to just meet people for the sake of meeting but to learn
> > all aspects of keeping anappointment. I am concentrating on the possible
> > >>>> Facebook: Violeta Cautin Epifani- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -