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Aaron J Dinkin

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Aug 2, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/2/00
to
: Describe the preparation of a chip butty in exacting detail with precise
: English grammar.

Here goes, with thanks to <http://www.cix.co.uk/~spuddy/potcook.html>.

Put at least four pints of peanut oil on to heat at a low temperature.
Peel four large floury-variety potatoes, rinse them, and put them into a
bowl of cold water. Cut the potatoes into strips that are approximately
half an inch wide and two inches long. Put the chips in a bowl of fresh
water until the oil has reached 300 degrees Fahrenheit.
For best results, cook the chips in batches so they don't all lump
together. Take the first batch out of the water, dry the chips off, put
them into a chip basket, and lower them into the oil. Let them cook for
five to six minutes, or until they get flabby-looking and are soft but
not browned; drain them; and put them to one side. Raise the temperature
of the oil to 360 degrees Fahrenheit and plunge the chips into the hot oil
to brown. This should only take two to three minutes. Afterwards, put the
chips on a hot serving dish and keep them warm in the oven at 275 F.
Sprinkle the chips with garlic salt. Cut slices of granary bread and
spread them thickly with butter. Make sandwiches of the bread and chips,
sprinkling the chips with salt and vinegar. A good chip butty should have
more chips than bread and should ooze butter when bitten. Serve with a
glass of beer.

-Aaron J. Dinkin
Dr. Whom

Laura F Spira

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Aug 2, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/2/00
to
Aaron J Dinkin wrote:

Garlic salt? Granary bread? What kind of chip butty is this, for goodness
sake? White bread and tomato ketchup, *if* you please, Dr. Dinkier! I hope the
Panel members are competent to judge this 'toughie' appropriately...

--
Laura
(emulate St. George for email)

Stephen Toogood

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Aug 3, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/3/00
to
In article <39888223...@DRAGONspira.u-net.com>, Laura F Spira
<la...@DRAGONspira.u-net.com> writes
We're not done with him yet Laura. He will not grasp so easily through
my slip. (nor yours, I trust)

Two more errors.

First, the procedure is a recipe for southern chips, which are not often
put in butties. To produce a decent chip, scrap the peanut oil
(interesting that we still use the word 'groundnut' when we're talking
oil, but I digress), and substitute proper beef dripping.

Second, the final stage. What Aaron made is a chip sandwich, and what
with the granary bread, I can almost hear the Secretary of State for
Northern Ireland asking in Scunthorpe for some of that guacamole on it.

To make a proper butty, hold a single piece of white bread in your left
hand (right if you're a southpaw). Place chips on the half nearest the
body. Close your hand. A butty is a single piece of bread folded.
--
Stephen Toogood

Garry J. Vass

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Aug 6, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/6/00
to
Stephen Toogood <ste...@stenches.nospam.demon.co.uk> wrote in message
news:Rt246WA$edi5...@stenches.demon.co.uk...

> In article <39888223...@DRAGONspira.u-net.com>, Laura F Spira
> <la...@DRAGONspira.u-net.com> writes
> >Aaron J Dinkin wrote:
> >
> >> : Describe the preparation of a chip butty in exacting detail with
precise
> >> : English grammar.
> >>
> >> Here goes, with thanks to <http://www.cix.co.uk/~spuddy/potcook.html>.
> >>
> >
> >Garlic salt? Granary bread? What kind of chip butty is this, for goodness
> >sake? White bread and tomato ketchup, *if* you please, Dr. Dinkier! I
hope the
> >Panel members are competent to judge this 'toughie' appropriately...
> >
> We're not done with him yet Laura. He will not grasp so easily through
> my slip. (nor yours, I trust)
>
> Two more errors.
>

I think Aaron made a valiant effort, and the Panel is pretty much agreed
that whoever attempts this toughie, much less answers it, will be a brave
soul indeed. What with the male population of the UKoGBNIatCI out to
second-guess and nit-pick, the task is a daunting one.

On the other hand, I've noticed that Mike has been awarding nothing less
than a full Touabire for the toughies answered thus far.

Who knows? Perhaps some intrepid soul will yet navigate those treacherous
shoals...
--
Posted by a member of the Totally Official aue Summer Doldrums
Competition Panel. For further information, including how to filter out
these messages, go to http://www.exodus.u-net.com/sdc2000/filtering.htm


Dennis Bathory-Kitsz

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Aug 6, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/6/00
to
Aaron J Dinkin wrote:
>
> Put at least four pints of peanut oil

[snip]

Is this some sort of food? Or simply the rapid transformation of raw
materials into compost?

Dennis

--
Dennis Báthory-Kitsz

MaltedMedia Productions: http://maltedmedia.com/
Kalvos & Damian's New Music Bazaar: http://kalvos.org/
The Transitive Empire: http://maltedmedia.com/empire/
OrbitAccess Accessibility: http://orbitaccess.com/
Downloadable Scores: http://maltedmedia.com/scores/
Lullaby for Bill Gates: http://www.mp3.com/bathory/
ICQ: 10526261 / AIM: DBathory

Mike Barnes

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Aug 6, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/6/00
to
In alt.usage.english, Garry J. Vass <ga...@totally-official.com> wrote

>Stephen Toogood <ste...@stenches.nospam.demon.co.uk> wrote in message
>news:Rt246WA$edi5...@stenches.demon.co.uk...
>> In article <39888223...@DRAGONspira.u-net.com>, Laura F Spira
>> <la...@DRAGONspira.u-net.com> writes
>> >Aaron J Dinkin wrote:
>> >
>> >> : Describe the preparation of a chip butty in exacting detail with
>precise
>> >> : English grammar.
>> >>
>> >> Here goes, with thanks to <http://www.cix.co.uk/~spuddy/potcook.html>.
>> >>
>> >
>> >Garlic salt? Granary bread? What kind of chip butty is this, for goodness
>> >sake? White bread and tomato ketchup, *if* you please, Dr. Dinkier! I
>hope the
>> >Panel members are competent to judge this 'toughie' appropriately...
>> >
>> We're not done with him yet Laura. He will not grasp so easily through
>> my slip. (nor yours, I trust)
>>
>> Two more errors.
>>
>
>I think Aaron made a valiant effort, and the Panel is pretty much agreed
>that whoever attempts this toughie, much less answers it, will be a brave
>soul indeed. What with the male population of the UKoGBNIatCI out to
>second-guess and nit-pick, the task is a daunting one.

I agree. For good reason they're called "Toughies".

>On the other hand, I've noticed that Mike has been awarding nothing less
>than a full Touabire for the toughies answered thus far.

Indeed, and if Aaron's answer is declared "Totally Correct", a full
Touabire will be his, if he has room for it. If no Totally correct
answer is posted before the end of the competition, I can see some
Katahdins coming Aaron's way.

>Who knows? Perhaps some intrepid soul will yet navigate those treacherous
>shoals...

If *I* was competing I would shamelessly plagiarise Aaron's work, make
suitable changes in the light of comments posted so far, and try to win
that Touabire for myself. There's nothing in the rules about
plagiarism.

--
Mike Barnes

Gwen Lenker

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Aug 6, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/6/00
to
On Sun, 6 Aug 2000 18:42:13 +0100, Mike Barnes <mi...@senrab.com>
wrote:

>If *I* was competing I would shamelessly plagiarise Aaron's work, make
>suitable changes in the light of comments posted so far, and try to win
>that Touabire for myself. There's nothing in the rules about
>plagiarism.

With all due respect, there is, indeed, something in the rules about
plagiarism. Plagiarism is actively encouraged.

That's for the regular competition, I presume. I'm not sure how it
would affect the Sportsmanship award.

Could we have an official clarification of this point?


Garry J. Vass

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Aug 6, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/6/00
to
Gwen Lenker <gale...@mail.com> wrote in message
news:398dc51c...@news.cis.dfn.de...

Totally Official Clarification: Plagiarism reduces the overall bandwidth
drain on the network. Reducing the overall bandwidth on the network is
seen to be a selfless act that benefits others. Hence, it is a small, but
visible enhancement to one's achievements in demonstrating Sportsmanship.
It is encouraged. Hope this helps!

Mike Barnes

unread,
Aug 7, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/7/00
to
In alt.usage.english, Gwen Lenker <gale...@mail.com> wrote

>On Sun, 6 Aug 2000 18:42:13 +0100, Mike Barnes <mi...@senrab.com>
>wrote:
>
>>If *I* was competing I would shamelessly plagiarise Aaron's work, make
>>suitable changes in the light of comments posted so far, and try to win
>>that Touabire for myself. There's nothing in the rules about
>>plagiarism.
>
>With all due respect, there is, indeed, something in the rules about
>plagiarism. Plagiarism is actively encouraged.
>
>That's for the regular competition, I presume. I'm not sure how it
>would affect the Sportsmanship award.
>
>Could we have an official clarification of this point?

Of course, but first I'd need a pointer to the rules that you're looking
at. I suspect there might be some rules out there that I don't know
about. BTW I agree that plagiarism is a good thing and I wouldn't be
surprised to hear that it's encouraged somewhere, perhaps in an FAQ, but
I don't know that that encouragement has been enshrined in a rule as
such. I can imagine a rule forbidding plagiarism and I was merely
trying to stress the fact that there isn't one.

--
Mike Barnes

Gwen Lenker

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Aug 7, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/7/00
to
On Mon, 7 Aug 2000 00:01:29 +0100, Mike Barnes <mi...@senrab.com>
wrote:

>In alt.usage.english, Gwen Lenker <gale...@mail.com> wrote

>>Could we have an official clarification of this point?


>
>Of course, but first I'd need a pointer to the rules that you're looking
>at. I suspect there might be some rules out there that I don't know
>about. BTW I agree that plagiarism is a good thing and I wouldn't be
>surprised to hear that it's encouraged somewhere, perhaps in an FAQ, but
>I don't know that that encouragement has been enshrined in a rule as
>such. I can imagine a rule forbidding plagiarism and I was merely
>trying to stress the fact that there isn't one.

It's one of the original rules, which may be found at
http://www.deja.com/getdoc.xp?AN=501515695&fmt=text

"8. Plagiarism: You may plagiarise any other poster's response.
All is fair game. Cut and paste any prior postings you think
are correct! Plagiarism works! The first poster to answer all
the questions correctly wins. The 'uniPondial' questions are
deliberate! Help each other!!!!"

And Garry reasserted Rule Eight just under a week ago. See
http://www.deja.com/getdoc.xp?AN=652955630&fmt=text

"As always, plagiarism is not only fair, it's expected."

Rule Eight. It's not just a rule. It's tradition!

Hope this helps.


Laura F Spira

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Aug 7, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/7/00
to
"Garry J. Vass" wrote:

> Stephen Toogood <ste...@stenches.nospam.demon.co.uk> wrote in message
> news:Rt246WA$edi5...@stenches.demon.co.uk...
> > In article <39888223...@DRAGONspira.u-net.com>, Laura F Spira
> > <la...@DRAGONspira.u-net.com> writes
> > >Aaron J Dinkin wrote:
> > >
> > >> : Describe the preparation of a chip butty in exacting detail with
> precise
> > >> : English grammar.
> > >>
> > >> Here goes, with thanks to <http://www.cix.co.uk/~spuddy/potcook.html>.
> > >>
> > >
> > >Garlic salt? Granary bread? What kind of chip butty is this, for goodness
> > >sake? White bread and tomato ketchup, *if* you please, Dr. Dinkier! I
> hope the
> > >Panel members are competent to judge this 'toughie' appropriately...
> > >
> > We're not done with him yet Laura. He will not grasp so easily through
> > my slip. (nor yours, I trust)
> >
> > Two more errors.
> >
>
> I think Aaron made a valiant effort, and the Panel is pretty much agreed
> that whoever attempts this toughie, much less answers it, will be a brave
> soul indeed. What with the male population of the UKoGBNIatCI out to
> second-guess and nit-pick, the task is a daunting one.
>

> On the other hand, I've noticed that Mike has been awarding nothing less
> than a full Touabire for the toughies answered thus far.
>

> Who knows? Perhaps some intrepid soul will yet navigate those treacherous
> shoals...
>

Come on, chaps, national pride is at stake here - we can't let this one go to a
competitor from the other side of the pond, especially with such a feeble
effort! I'd have a go but I'm on a diet...

--
Laura, female nit-picker

Mike Barnes

unread,
Aug 7, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/7/00
to
In alt.usage.english, Gwen Lenker <gale...@mail.com> wrote
>On Mon, 7 Aug 2000 00:01:29 +0100, Mike Barnes <mi...@senrab.com>
>wrote:
>
>>In alt.usage.english, Gwen Lenker <gale...@mail.com> wrote
>
>>>Could we have an official clarification of this point?
>>
>>Of course, but first I'd need a pointer to the rules that you're looking
>>at. I suspect there might be some rules out there that I don't know
>>about. BTW I agree that plagiarism is a good thing and I wouldn't be
>>surprised to hear that it's encouraged somewhere, perhaps in an FAQ, but
>>I don't know that that encouragement has been enshrined in a rule as
>>such. I can imagine a rule forbidding plagiarism and I was merely
>>trying to stress the fact that there isn't one.
>
>It's one of the original rules, which may be found at
>http://www.deja.com/getdoc.xp?AN=501515695&fmt=text
>
>"8. Plagiarism: You may plagiarise any other poster's response.
>All is fair game. Cut and paste any prior postings you think
>are correct! Plagiarism works! The first poster to answer all
>the questions correctly wins. The 'uniPondial' questions are
>deliberate! Help each other!!!!"

As you realised of course, that was a rule of the 1999 competition.
This year is different.

>And Garry reasserted Rule Eight just under a week ago. See
>http://www.deja.com/getdoc.xp?AN=652955630&fmt=text
>
>"As always, plagiarism is not only fair, it's expected."

Quite right.

>Rule Eight. It's not just a rule. It's tradition!

It is a tradition, but it isn't a rule. The Panel decided on a minimal
rule set this year, and plagiarism didn't make it.

--
Mike Barnes

Aaron J Dinkin

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Aug 7, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/7/00
to
>>Aaron J Dinkin wrote:
>>
>>> : Describe the preparation of a chip butty in exacting detail with precise
>>> : English grammar.
>>>
>>> Here goes, with thanks to <http://www.cix.co.uk/~spuddy/potcook.html>.

Revised 8/7/00 with grateful appreciation to Laura Spira and Stephen
Toogood.

>>> Put a pot of beef dripping on to heat at a low temperature. Peel four


>>> large floury-variety potatoes, rinse them, and put them into a bowl
>>> of cold water. Cut the potatoes into strips that are approximately
>>> half an inch wide and two inches long. Put the chips in a bowl of

>>> fresh water until the beef dripping has reached 300 degrees Fahrenheit.


>>> For best results, cook the chips in batches so they don't all lump
>>> together. Take the first batch out of the water, dry the chips off,

>>> put them into a chip basket, and lower them into the beef dripping.


>>> Let them cook for five to six minutes, or until they get
>>> flabby-looking and are soft but not browned; drain them; and put them

>>> to one side. Raise the temperature of the beef dripping to 360 degrees
>>> Fahrenheit and plunge the chips into the hot beef dripping to brown.


>>> This should only take two to three minutes. Afterwards, put the chips

>>> on a hot serving dish and keep them warm in the oven at 275 F. Spread
>>> white bread thickly with butter. Make a half-sandwich of the bread
>>> and chips by folding single slices of white bread around generous
>>> helpings of chips, adding salt, vinegar, and ketchup. A good chip
>>> butty should have more chips than bread and should ooze butter and
>>> ketchup when bitten. Serve with a glass of beer.

Mark Barratt

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Aug 7, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/7/00
to

Ugh. Absolutely disgusting. I think that's exactly the recipe.
Do you see where English cuisine gets its reputation?

Regards
Mark Barratt
TOaSDC defending champion


-----------------------------------------------------------

Got questions? Get answers over the phone at Keen.com.
Up to 100 minutes free!
http://www.keen.com


Arbub

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Aug 7, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/7/00
to

Aaron J Dinkin wrote in message <8m9q6h$1j$1...@news.fas.harvard.edu>...

>: Describe the preparation of a chip butty in exacting detail with precise
>: English grammar.
>
>Here goes, with thanks to <http://www.cix.co.uk/~spuddy/potcook.html>.
>
>Put at least four pints of peanut oil on to heat at a low temperature.
<snip>

Hold it right there Aaron.

*Proper* chips are cooked in lard.

GT

Mike Barnes

unread,
Aug 8, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/8/00
to
In alt.usage.english, Aaron J Dinkin <din...@fas.harvard.edu> wrote

>>>Aaron J Dinkin wrote:
>>>
>>>> : Describe the preparation of a chip butty in exacting detail with precise
>>>> : English grammar.
>>>>
>>>> Here goes, with thanks to <http://www.cix.co.uk/~spuddy/potcook.html>.
>
>Revised 8/7/00 with grateful appreciation to Laura Spira and Stephen
>Toogood.
>
>>>> Put a pot of beef dripping on to heat at a low temperature. Peel four

>>>> large floury-variety potatoes, rinse them, and put them into a bowl
>>>> of cold water. Cut the potatoes into strips that are approximately
>>>> half an inch wide and two inches long. Put the chips in a bowl of
>>>> fresh water until the beef dripping has reached 300 degrees Fahrenheit.
>>>> For best results, cook the chips in batches so they don't all lump
>>>> together. Take the first batch out of the water, dry the chips off,
>>>> put them into a chip basket, and lower them into the beef dripping.
>>>> Let them cook for five to six minutes, or until they get
>>>> flabby-looking and are soft but not browned; drain them; and put them
>>>> to one side. Raise the temperature of the beef dripping to 360 degrees
>>>> Fahrenheit and plunge the chips into the hot beef dripping to brown.
>>>> This should only take two to three minutes. Afterwards, put the chips
>>>> on a hot serving dish and keep them warm in the oven at 275 F. Spread
>>>> white bread thickly with butter. Make a half-sandwich of the bread
>>>> and chips by folding single slices of white bread around generous
>>>> helpings of chips, adding salt, vinegar, and ketchup. A good chip
>>>> butty should have more chips than bread and should ooze butter and
>>>> ketchup when bitten. Serve with a glass of beer.

OK, OK, the prize is yours! Just don't post any more of this stuff!

Your Touabire now has a friend. Congratulations!

Look out for a scoreboard update in about nine hours' time.

--
Mike Barnes

Mike Page

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Aug 8, 2000, 3:00:00 AM8/8/00
to
On Mon, 07 Aug 2000 07:04:44 +0100, Laura F Spira
<la...@DRAGONspira.u-net.com> wrote:


>
>Come on, chaps, national pride is at stake here - we can't let this one go to a
>competitor from the other side of the pond, especially with such a feeble
>effort! I'd have a go but I'm on a diet...


Convenience Chip Butty

Buy a portion of chips, well seasoned with salt and vinegar, from
the chippy. Coat two slices of steam-baked bread with cheap
margarine. Place a generous quantity of chips on one slice of
bread. Add a goodly serving of tomato ketchup. Place other
slice of bread on top.

Home-made Chip Butty (serves 4)

Peel 2lbs of waxy potatoes and cut into strips. Soak chips in
salted water for a while. Dry the chips in a salad spinner.
Deep fry the chips in sunflower oil. Season the chips with salt
and malt vinegar. Butter eight slices of good quality white
bread. Distribute the chips evenly among four slices of the
bread. Add a generous amount of tomato ketchup to the chips.
Complete the sandwiches with the remaining four slices of bread.

Chip Butty Gourmet Variations

Use ciabatta instead of white bread.
Use olive oil for frying (or oven fry by coating the chips
lightly in olive oil and placing them in a hot oven for about
twenty minutes).
Season the chips with sea salt and balsamic vinegar.
Butter the bread with herb or garlic butter.
Add a few sun dried tomatoes to the sandwiches, but on no account
omit the tomato ketchup.

Oh sod it, I see a sheep has been awarded. I'll post this
anyway.

Mike Page
Let the ape escape for e-mail

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