Attn: Mike Soja
The Reaper
Be very cautious and walk lite.
I will return.
Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/
Before you buy.
The Reaper
Subject: Re: How to help?
Date: 16 Apr 2000 00:00:00 GMT
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Newsgroups: alt.recovery.addiction.alcoholism
On 17 Apr 2000 01:49:26 GMT, mandy...@aol.com (Mandy10203) posted:
>I have a friend who is an alcoholic. He's high functioning in that he
never
>misses work and doesn't lose his job, house, etc. According to him, he
finds
>it hard to form close relationships with people (and has given up hope
of ever
>getting married). I understand what he is going through in that I've
had my
>own problems with addiction (alcohol wasn't the substance though) and I
know
>what he has is a disease (he doesn't deny he is an alcoholic so he
knows what
>he has). My question is, is there any way I can help him? I know he
has to
>want to get better on his own, but am I fooling myself to think my
friendship
>and support would make any kind of difference in his life? The more he
opens
>up to me the more I can see myself falling for him, even though I know
he is
>heartbreak waiting to happen.
>I'd appreciate any insight anyone here can offer about the limits of
>befriending an alcoholic. Thanks...
Didn't work out for me. I was a drinker when I got involved with my
drinking girlfriend last year. Through one thing and another, some of
it pretty ugly, I gave up the juice. She didn't. She knows it's a
problem. But. Said that she never missed work, wasn't losing her
house, etc. etc. Except I saw that her work was suffering, her house
was a mess, bills really weren't being paid on time, and our
relationship was turning to more and more crap. We were both in
therapy separately but it was as though her therapist wasn't aware of
the extent of her problem or she hid and minimized with him as she did
with everyone else. I tried putting pressure on her but it all
cracked up. She's still saucing it and working on a new relationship,
which is doomed to fail just like all her others.
I wouldn't recommend it unless I had a commitment from the other
person to actually try and do something about it. I never could get
that commitment from my exg. The booze was more important than me, I
guess. Think hard about it. Still, it's worth it to try and help (I
still think, maybe I haven't learned my lesson.) if you're able to
keep yourself at an emotional distance.
Pose your same question over in alt.recovery.codependency and you'll
really get an earful.
Mike
M.L.S.
posted:
>I am going to hand you your ass on a stick.
>Be very cautious and walk lite.
>I will return.
Welcome to alt.support.herpes.
Be careful when you play with my ass.
You might get a disease that won't go away.
Hope this helps.
Mike
***************************************************
*** And then a Plank in Reason, broke,
*** And I dropped down, and down --
*** And hit a World, at every plunge,
*** And Finished knowing -- then --
*** -- Emily Dickinson
***************************************************
cocoabeany
be interested in this sort of thing.
Denise
* Sent from RemarQ http://www.remarq.com The Internet's Discussion Network *
The fastest and easiest way to search and participate in Usenet - Free!
Happy
<sweetbean...@yahoo.com.invalid> attempted to make sense by
shouting the following:
It's public domain.
M.L.S.
>doesnt this qualify as stalking? seems some authorities might
>be interested in this sort of thing.
It qualifies as . . . not much. Just coward punk threats. Publishing
someone's personals isn't in itself a crime, but the intent to
motivate people (with false information) against another person is.
If the punks really believed in themselves they wouldn't hide behind
anonymous servers. But anonymous servers do not provide total
anonymity. I have asked the remailers to archive the logs on the
offending posts in case it should come to litigation.
Yours,
MARYGMARY
why don't you and I BOTH leave the
NG????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
????????????????????????
M
MARYGMARY
workin on it
Happy
attempted to make sense by shouting the following:
>On Thu, 27 Apr 2000 10:25:53 -0700, cocoabeany
><sweetbean...@yahoo.com.invalid> posted:
>
>>doesnt this qualify as stalking? seems some authorities might
>>be interested in this sort of thing.
>
>It qualifies as . . . not much. Just coward punk threats. Publishing
>someone's personals isn't in itself a crime, but the intent to
>motivate people (with false information) against another person is.
>If the punks really believed in themselves they wouldn't hide behind
>anonymous servers. But anonymous servers do not provide total
>anonymity. I have asked the remailers to archive the logs on the
>offending posts in case it should come to litigation.
Ha Ha Ha
What a pussy.
Have you ever heard of working behind the scenes?
M.L.S.
>Twenty million to one it was you trying to make me look bad
You want to put your money where your mouth is?
>why don't you and I BOTH leave the
>NG????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
>??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
>????????????????????????
For the very simple reason that you wouldn't believe it if I did
leave. Look at the way that you've accused nearly every person you
disagree with of being me. Now it's the little pretend hacker who is
here as a direct side effect of your totally false and malicious rants
against me. None of them are me, Mary. I am not under every rock,
bush, and tree. It's been pointed out to you in numerous examples.
When are you going to get a grip???
Love,
Mike
***********************************************************
** I imagine him
** Impotent as distant thunder,
** In whose shadow I have eaten my ghost ration.
** I wish him dead or away.
** That, it seems, is the impossibility.
**
** That being free. What would the dark
** Do without fevers to eat?
** What would the light
** Do without eyes to knife, what would he
** Do, do, do without me?
** -- Sylvia Plath, Oct 17 '62, from The Jailer
***********************************************************
M.L.S.
>> in case it should come to litigation.
>workin on it
I will hold you personally responsible for any damage that you, your
hacker friends, or anyone else you've incited, do to me or my
belongings. Period.
Mike
Happy
attempted to make sense by shouting the following:
>On 28 Apr 2000 08:22:52 GMT, mary...@aol.com (MARYGMARY) posted:
>
>>Twenty million to one it was you trying to make me look bad
>
>You want to put your money where your mouth is?
>
>>why don't you and I BOTH leave the
>>NG????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
>>??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
>>????????????????????????
>
>For the very simple reason that you wouldn't believe it if I did
>leave. Look at the way that you've accused nearly every person you
>disagree with of being me. Now it's the little pretend hacker who is
>here as a direct side effect of your totally false and malicious rants
>against me. None of them are me, Mary. I am not under every rock,
>bush, and tree. It's been pointed out to you in numerous examples.
>When are you going to get a grip???
You are alone my friend.
MARYGMARY
are physically, secondly I can't be responsible for anyone who you have incited
to action with your actions and behavior, thirdy I am sure the whole world will
raly to the side of a woman beater....lol
Me
>Subject: Re: Attn: Mike Soja
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>From: nom...@wirefire.com (M.L.S.)
>Newsgroups: alt.support.herpes
>Date: Fri, 28 Apr 2000 13:20:24 -0400
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Happy
to make sense by shouting the following:
>First of all I have a life and have better things to do that squish the bug you
>are physically, secondly I can't be responsible for anyone who you have incited
>to action with your actions and behavior, thirdy I am sure the whole world will
>raly to the side of a woman beater....lol
Is this worm a woman beater?
That sheds new light on the matter.
M.L.S.
>Is this worm a woman beater?
>That sheds new light on the matter.
No, this worm is not a woman beater. But M is an abusive bitch:
@July 12, 1999 - After dinner and shooting pool and M's drinking of
several shots of Tequila, she became irate and argumentative over
nothing. She jammed one of her high heels through a vent high up on
the dash of my truck, breaking it, and had to struggle to remove her
shoe from the dash. She became increasingly angry on the ride home
and tried to jump out of the truck doing 40 mph. Out of fear for her
safety I stopped the truck and she proceeded to stagger down the
middle of the road, lurching in her high heels. She removed her shoes
and threw them at the truck and continued wobbling down the middle of
the road. Out of frustration and fear for her safety I grabbed her
and wrestled her into the truck. She took several swings at me but
didn't connect. I locked the doors for the remainder of the ride.
She struggled to unlock her door, again attempting to get out of the
truck at speed, and ripped the electric window switch out of its
socket in the door. I left her in the truck at home and she took the
doggy bag from dinner and dumped it upside down on the truck seat.
Inside her house she picked up a big standing ashtray and threw it
against the sofa and floor, breaking it. Didn't remember anything in
the morning. We retrieved her shoes from the side of the road the
next day.
July 16, 1999 - Friday. We went to dinner at one of the nicest
restaurants in the area. We ate out on the quiet verandah with
several other couples near us. As the dinner proceeded and M drank
more and more wine she started cussing more and more, making me
uncomfortable. At some point she called me a "fucking prick" for
reasons that escape me now. Sensing my discomfort she asked, "Did I
fucking say something wrong or something?" which I thought beautifully
ironic. I told her I was upset at her language in such a nice place.
Of course she blew up, though quietly since we were at Xaviar's. We
cut dessert short and left arguing, first going home and then over to
a friend's hot tub. In the tub M, drinking a bottle of wine by
herself, raised her fists to me two or three times and said she wanted
to smash my face in. In the dark she very easily could have. And
when we were finally back home she raised her fists to me two more
times, threatening me again.
Late August - Raised her fist in anger at The King's College, in front
of the other workers there, and said she wanted to smash my face in
because I damaged the veneer on a dresser while putting a stained
glass window in her van. The veneer on other parts of the dresser was
pulling away in big sheets but no matter.
August 24, 1999 - Tuesday. On the way to Cape Cod M said she wanted
to smash my face in because I was frustrated with how late we were
(several hours.) At one point she said that I should drive the truck
full speed into a bridge and continued ranting and raving until she
made herself physically sick. She threw things out the window in high
speed in heavy traffic.
@August 28, 1999 - At the store, she threatened to punch my face in
but "only" threw a box of Christmas ornaments at me, hitting me. She
threw and smashed other merchandise in the store.
September 1, 1999 - Wednesday. M broke two coffee pots and several
dishes in anger over having to clean on her day off. She threatened
to punch my face in and to smash me with a plate. She threw a laundry
basket at me.
September 5, 1999 - Sunday. M threw boxes of merchandise into the
store in anger. She didn't specifically physically threaten me but
the elements for it were there. Too drunk to drive herself home and
too pissed to have me drive her as I usually did, she walked to the
road and hitched a ride with the first passing car. Because I didn't
follow behind but went home the other way she was pissed some more.
Several hours later:
September 6, 1999 - Around 2 a.m., after several more beers and some
Jack Daniels by both of us (me more than her on the Jack) I called M
"a fucking nutcase" and she slammed me in the head with her elbow
while we lay in bed. We both got out of bed. She punched me in the
face again as I yelled at her and she left the room. I slammed the
door against the wall and smashed a lamp. She came back in the room
and lunged at me with a dental pick. We wrestled and I banged her
head on a glass jewelry box on her dresser. I let her up. She came at
me with the broken lamp. We wrestled to a stop against the bed. I
let her up. She threw a heavy vase at me, hitting my back, just
missing my spine. She spit on me repeatedly. And attacked me again
with her fists. We wrestled again to the floor. I let her up.
Later, at the hospital she had to be physically restrained (strapped
to a chair I believe) and repeatedly spit on the doctors trying to
attend to the cut on her forehead. (So she told me.)
@September 18, 1999 - M raised her fist to me in her store, just
inside the back door. She quickly said that she was just joking but
she hadn't been when she raised her fist.
**I wasn't in NY from Sep 21 through Oct 20**
October 30, 1999 - Saturday. During an argument before a Halloween
party she violently kicked her shoes off, hitting me with one, but
claimed it was an accident.
November 1, 1999 - Monday. At the shop, M threw a books at me twice.
November 24, 1999 - Wednesday night Thursday morning. M drank a beer,
glass of wine at dinner and then 1 ½ bottles of wine and another beer
at my house. Punched me three times in head from inside car while I
kneeled in garage trying to talk to her. Punched me in the face in
upstairs hall twice. Tried to claw and punch her son repeatedly when
he refused to get out of bed and sleep in car. Smashed stereo off
speakers, breaking it, and cleared the mantle of knick knacks,
breaking several. Continued to raise fists to me downstairs and spit
on me repeatedly in dining room. In the morning kicked over birdbath
trying to smash it.
January 9, 2000 - Sunday. M kicked over big pile of dishes in shop,
saying she'd wanted to do that for some time, just angry in general.
Heavy drinking.
January 10, 2000 - Monday. M smashed more things in store, drinking.
January 30, 2000 - Sunday night. M tore up phone book and threw it on
floor. Smashed dishes into sink. Threw cat food all over floor.
Knocked keyboards to the floor. Went up to her son's room and smashed
dresser drawer. Later claimed everything just "fell over." Broke up
with me later that night.
------------
The above barely reflects the constant verbal abuse and anger that M
subjects to those around her on an almost daily basis.
MARYGMARY
In Putnam County New York...held at the Carmel Jail on or about Sept 6th
Plead guilty.
Lawrence Michael Soja
Love,
Mary
>Subject: Re: Attn: Mike Soja
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>From: Happy hip...@yoohoo.com
>Newsgroups: alt.support.herpes
>Date: Sat, 29 Apr 2000 04:09:25 GMT
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>
>
>On 29 Apr 2000 00:38:11 GMT, mary...@aol.com (MARYGMARY) attempted
>to make sense by shouting the following:
>
>>First of all I have a life and have better things to do that squish the bug
>you
>>are physically, secondly I can't be responsible for anyone who you have
>incited
>>to action with your actions and behavior, thirdy I am sure the whole world
>will
>>raly to the side of a woman beater....lol
Happy
attempted to make sense by shouting the following:
>On Sat, 29 Apr 2000 04:09:25 GMT, Happy <hip...@yoohoo.com > posted:
Still doing that 2 step for me?
I know you said you were leaving, But we really know you are lurking.
So why don't you just come on back and dance for me. I am sure the
regs will be amused.
MARYGMARY
will all end but I am sure that God eill get you for what you have done and the
way you have lied. I am sure...even if it's thast the only company you ever
have is thiat keyboard of you with your lies. I'm not going over everyone of
them because I already spent to much of my valuable time on this huey tonight
but just one I will never forget was Exaviars...rated the finest resteraunt in
all New York, My favorite that I asked you to go to with me and you came out of
the bedroom wearing a tie with Neon colored boxer shorts all over it with polka
dots and all. I, in my most polite manner tried to gently tell you that
although I thought the tie was wonderful that it was inappropriate for this
occasion,.. You were hostile the entire even ing to the point that when I said
shit in our private conversation you said that "my dress had offended you but
you r behavior is horrible, you talk like a pig!" I at theat pint then asked
the waiter when he came over if my behavior that evening had been anything less
than appropriate and if I had acted any less than a lady, at which point he
said "absolutely not" I aksed that he bring the car about and give you the
check at which point I stood up and left the table strutting out in my evening
gown...HA
one other night the other lies I can't even be bothered with...I don't break my
own inventory.
I wnet out with you and even though I was with you all kinds of guys were
trying to hang on me because we left the resteraunt and were playing pool.
they were coming on to me and asking when they could get together with
me...pigs and you would never know I was with a MAN cause he said nothing till
I told them off and then tried to walk home but someone wouldn't let me out of
the car.
Screemed and yelled at me all the way to Mass to meet his mom till I was
droning in my own tears asking to be taken to any train to go home and so upset
I felt ill and became ill and had to have the car stopped because I threw up he
was yelling at me so much and then when we geot up there didn't take me to
train but had mom come out and convince me to come in and that is when I met
her and she said they always called you contrary Mike. She made me laugh. I
like d her even though you didn't. I aked you to fix her chimes she asked you
about which you never did do
did you?
thanksgiving ... a nightmare and a half....massages from women on the machine
saying Mike were nice and we want you comon over sounding stoned on
something---no explanation...dinner with father/ parents drove two and a half
hours and had 1/2 bowl of onion soup even though they are hefty...what gives
then asked you for chicken soup...tooo much trouble...you brought wine to
neighbors house you slept with and had me ahng out with the two of you---hard
on me consdidering the lies too...then osterasized me for drinking the wine YOU
brought with her.......My son found a big bag of drugs in your computer drawer
when you left him there to play. I wanted to go and sleep in my car but you
stole the keys and then when I told you I wanted to sleep down there you woke
my son and told him "Your mother is a drunk and she wants to leave" over and
over. Wanna ask him.. Your mother is a DRUNK...then yes I did try to tip over
the birdbath you bought from me after I told you countless times how much it
had bothered me in the past that my old boyfriend would decorate his apartment
from my store while living in my house...Yep guilty of that but I didn't break
it did I? and you just smashed my skull in weeks before and this was your big
make up holiday? after the dress on Holloween...nice but my friend is bi so
that's o.k. I guess....LOL
The lies you tell about what you did to me that night you should simply rot in
hell for!
You were helping to laod a truck but had to make such a show of yourself as to
take eveything back out and totallay inconvienience seven people. They wer all
making faces at me bulging eyes...have fun big man.. I never threatened you I
just laughed at you. I did tell you later you made me angry with your
behavior. I didn't threaten you and even if I had Mike it's one thing to say I
felt like smacking you or punching you and not to have done it and a whole
different thing to do it. I guess you proved who was the lion is that it
Mike????
I did not hit you...you hit me Mike. I hit you back once when you beat me and
then broke my grandmas pic....I was swinging my arms when you were trying to
stop me from getting away from your ugliness on thansgiving after all you had
done over time...yep I was out by my car and you were fgoing to take charge
of me. I didn't even have the keys and I just wanted to sleep away from you
and you were going to force me to do different. My son was trying to look out
for me and you took the keys and told him NOT to give them to anyone...I wans'
tgoing anywhere as at this pint you had seen me sleep in the car out of my own
bed because of you and your hostility before. He and I have a close
relationship and you are going to have a hard time convincing anyone of your
lies. We get along great. we had fights becasue of you coming here but that
went by and hasn't been since. You are the one that Hit ME tell it to the
courts Mike take me to court for slander if it's a lie I'm checking my e-mails
and I'll be back with your own words...LOL Noone hit anybody but you Mike!
Yeha I slapped at you on Thanksgiving eve to try to get you off me but no more.
I don't do bodily harm to others like you...you nearly killed me and I wansn't
hitting you and you know it. You smahed me bad and I say it was DR. D head in
the bedroom with the lamp....I was there and you only have to live with
yourself! I have had scuffles with other boyfriends but nothing like this
nothing ever we NEVER hit each other like waht you did to me....push shove
smack a couple times in y life but never anything like what you did. That was
the most violent thing that ever happened to me and I guess it took me along
time to come out of shock...You love me?????LOLOLOL
Funniest thing I heard all year....at least I can laugh and especially at those
who buy into it,
Mary
Not going on that junk tit for tat too busy./...bye
I though you were leaving
>Subject: Re: Attn: Mike Soja
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>From: nom...@wirefire.com (M.L.S.)
>Newsgroups: alt.support.herpes
>Date: Sat, 29 Apr 2000 02:53:59 -0400
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MARYGMARY
know I'll invite you to private e-mail this to me so you won't have to bether
the group you love so much anymore with it witch.
Pauly and April had the right idea but I was so upset with my son wiggin out
and Mikes coming here I was a wreck. One look at him and he jumped out the
window. You got along for a while I'll have to hand it to you I even started
to really respect the way you had grown up but you are slippin now
Yosh...bigtime...You and Mike missed the boat, maybe you woud suit each other.
You are so nasty he would most likely kiss your but. hahaha well wait, how
much money do you make??
Mary
>
>Save it for therapy Mary.
>Nobody wants to hear this crap.
>-Angela
>