Dark Musings: 20
Anonymous
(20)
The sun rose too early the next morning. And it was with
reluctance that we rose and checked out of the hotel. The rest of
my time there was spent in saying goodbye. I said goodbye to all
the wonderful people I had met, and I knew that my fairy-tale time
had come to an end.
Soon it was time to go to the airport, and be on our way. Jo said
goodbye to John at the gate. I had a flight that would allow me to
go part of the way with Jeffery and Jo, so our goodbye was not
quite yet.
I'm a terrible traveler. I have severe motion sickness, and as our
flight took off, I felt the nausea welling up. I didn't want to
disgrace myself in front of Jeffery, as Jo had kindly traded her
seat for mine so that Jeffery and I might have a last bit of time
together.
As the plane rose into the air, Jeffery gave me yet another gift.
He had me close my eyes and he talked to me. With my eyes closed
and his voice caressing me, making me relive the things he had done
to me that weekend, I was able to make it through the flight with
minimum discomfort. I was amazed and very grateful. I am so very
miserable when I fly, and his help was wonderful. Again, I felt
very submissive and very aware that this man was my Master in a way
I had never before experienced. The plane finally landed at our
point of divergence. We had a few minutes to sit and talk, and
then it was time for Jeffery and Jo to board their plane.
I clung to him tightly, trying hard not to cry. I knew he was
hurting, and I didn't wish to add my distress to his. I held on to
my tears until he had boarded his plane, and I watched it fly out
of sight.
I sat alone in the crowded airport. Listening to the people,
watching the life teeming around me, and not touching me. I knew
that a rough time awaited me when I made it back to Tom. But here
in the airport, I lived in the fantasy a little longer, and held
close the magic I had experienced that weekend with Jeffery.
The flight was long and tiring, and when I finally made it back, I
was very happy to see Tom waiting for me. I knew this had been
hard on him, and his haggard countenance was evidence that I was
not mistaken. He was so fragile, and I did my best to reassure him
of my love. It was good to be home, and Tom's solid presence was
very welcome. He started to grill me about what had happened, but
I stood firm and refused to be drawn into it. I was tired, and
glad to be home, and I didn't want anything to spoil it.
When we got home, he held me and let me know how much he missed
me. It felt good here with him, and I hoped that some of the
things I had learned would be able to help our relationship. I
knew that I would only be able to have a part-time relationship
with Jeffery, and I loved Tom. I wanted our relationship to be
strong and healthy, not what it had been.
Things went well for only a few hours. When I was undressing and
the bruises I had accumulated showed, Tom went through the roof.
He was angry and started yelling at me. I knew he was concerned
for my health, but something in me rebelled against his railing.
All the times he had done things with me, and he had hurt me far
worse without leaving a mark than all of what Jeffery had done.
I held my beautiful memories close to me, stubbornly refusing to
give up any to the twisted picture Tom was trying to create. I had
loved what Jeffery had done, and I wanted more. And I wasn't going
to yield an inch on how much it had meant to me.
Dark