That made Oi chuckle
Wicked Uncle Nigel
a road near WUNderland. We reached a long straight and I was idly
contemplating an overtake when an oncoming car appeared.
I instantly spotted the fact that he was on main-beam, and that the
lights were those bloody awful HID jobs.
Matey in the Tonka Toy gave him a quick flick of main beam as a
reminder. To no effect. So he gave him a slightly longer one. No
response.
And then...
The Whole Fucking World Lit Up.
The entire front end of the Tonka Toy must have been spotlights. You
could have seen it from the moon. I swear the truck slowed slightly
under the pressure of departing photons.
The oncoming wanker actually stopped (quite quickly).
I laughed. A lot.
Shortly afterwards I passed the Tonka Toy and gave him a *big*
thumbs-up. Oddly enough, his dipped beams were totally inoffensive. :^)
--
Wicked Uncle Nigel - "He's hopeless, but he's honest"
Contains moderate bullshit and simulated opinions.
Colin Irvine
the following:
>So this evening I was following (at a distance) a Tonka Toy pickup along
>a road near WUNderland. We reached a long straight and I was idly
>contemplating an overtake when an oncoming car appeared.
>
>I instantly spotted the fact that he was on main-beam, and that the
>lights were those bloody awful HID jobs.
>
>Matey in the Tonka Toy gave him a quick flick of main beam as a
>reminder. To no effect. So he gave him a slightly longer one. No
>response.
>
>And then...
>
>The Whole Fucking World Lit Up.
>
>The entire front end of the Tonka Toy must have been spotlights. You
>could have seen it from the moon. I swear the truck slowed slightly
>under the pressure of departing photons.
>
>The oncoming wanker actually stopped (quite quickly).
>
>I laughed. A lot.
>
>Shortly afterwards I passed the Tonka Toy and gave him a *big*
>thumbs-up. Oddly enough, his dipped beams were totally inoffensive. :^)
Nice.
--
Colin Irvine
ZZR1400 BOF#33 BONY#34 COFF#06 BHaLC#5
http://www.colinandpat.co.uk
CT
> So this evening I was following (at a distance) a Tonka Toy pickup
> along a road near WUNderland. We reached a long straight and I was
> idly contemplating an overtake when an oncoming car appeared.
>
> I instantly spotted the fact that he was on main-beam, and that the
> lights were those bloody awful HID jobs.
>
> Matey in the Tonka Toy gave him a quick flick of main beam as a
> reminder. To no effect. So he gave him a slightly longer one. No
> response.
>
> And then...
>
> The Whole Fucking World Lit Up.
>
> The entire front end of the Tonka Toy must have been spotlights. You
> could have seen it from the moon. I swear the truck slowed slightly
> under the pressure of departing photons.
>
> The oncoming wanker actually stopped (quite quickly).
>
> I laughed. A lot.
>
> Shortly afterwards I passed the Tonka Toy and gave him a big
> thumbs-up. Oddly enough, his dipped beams were totally inoffensive.
> :^)
Lovely.
I used to do similar[1] when I had spots fitted to the crash bars of my
GS550E.
[1] although not to *quite* as great an effect
--
Chris
Wicked Uncle Nigel
<m...@privacy.net> typed
>On Mon, 14 Feb 2011 22:23:20 GMT, Wicked Uncle Nigel wrote:
>
>> The entire front end of the Tonka Toy must have been spotlights. You
>> could have seen it from the moon. I swear the truck slowed slightly
>> under the pressure of departing photons.
>
>
>> The oncoming wanker actually stopped (quite quickly).
>
No, he didn't. On account of being unable to see the switch due the
smoke from his eyeballs, I imagine.
Krusty
> Matey in the Tonka Toy gave him a quick flick of main beam as a
> reminder. To no effect. So he gave him a slightly longer one. No
> response.
>
> And then...
>
> The Whole Fucking World Lit Up.
>
> The entire front end of the Tonka Toy must have been spotlights.
Lovely. I've stuck a couple of 100w spotlights on the Outlander & found
a suitably deserted bit of straight road last night to align them. I
don't know what the range is, but it's longer than I'll ever need, &
judging by the smoke coming off the lenses I'll be sorted if I ever
have the urge to fry some bacon at the side of the road.
--
Krusty
Raptor 1000 MV 750 Senna Tiger 955i Tiger 885 Fantic Hiro 250
Hog
> Wicked Uncle Nigel wrote:
>
>> Matey in the Tonka Toy gave him a quick flick of main beam as a
>> reminder. To no effect. So he gave him a slightly longer one. No
>> response.
>>
>> And then...
>>
>> The Whole Fucking World Lit Up.
>>
>> The entire front end of the Tonka Toy must have been spotlights.
>
> Lovely. I've stuck a couple of 100w spotlights on the Outlander &
> found a suitably deserted bit of straight road last night to align
> them. I don't know what the range is, but it's longer than I'll ever
> need, & judging by the smoke coming off the lenses I'll be sorted if
> I ever have the urge to fry some bacon at the side of the road.
You need some nice HID spotlights you do
--
Hog
Krusty
I really don't you know. The ones I've got are effectively free (had
them over 15 years) & give more than enough light.
Hog
Throw a rock into the pool why dontcha
--
Hog
Nige
"Krusty" <dontw...@nowhere.invalid> wrote in message
news:ijdv96$uhi$1...@news.eternal-september.org...
> Wicked Uncle Nigel wrote:
>
>> Matey in the Tonka Toy gave him a quick flick of main beam as a
>> reminder. To no effect. So he gave him a slightly longer one. No
>> response.
>>
>> And then...
>>
>> The Whole Fucking World Lit Up.
>>
>> The entire front end of the Tonka Toy must have been spotlights.
>
> Lovely. I've stuck a couple of 100w spotlights on the Outlander & found
> a suitably deserted bit of straight road last night to align them. I
> don't know what the range is, but it's longer than I'll ever need, &
> judging by the smoke coming off the lenses I'll be sorted if I ever
> have the urge to fry some bacon at the side of the road.
>
I once bought a second hand disco, it had a light bar on the top of the
windscreen with 4 massive fuck off jobbies & a light bar on the bumper with
another 4, but only 2 worked. Jesus fucking christ, it was like daylight :)
I took 'em off & flogged them.
SIRPip
> I took 'em off & flogged them.
That's a .sig line for you forever, Nige.
--
SIRPip: B12
Nige
"SIRPip" <ginge...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:xn0haeoj8...@news.eternal-september.org...
> Nige wrote:
>
>> I took 'em off & flogged them.
>
> That's a .sig line for you forever, Nige.
Quite....
Cab
> So this evening I was following (at a distance) a Tonka Toy pickup
> along a road near WUNderland. We reached a long straight and I was
> idly contemplating an overtake when an oncoming car appeared.
>
> I instantly spotted the fact that he was on main-beam, and that the
> lights were those bloody awful HID jobs.
>
> Matey in the Tonka Toy gave him a quick flick of main beam as a
> reminder. To no effect. So he gave him a slightly longer one. No
> response.
>
> And then...
>
> The Whole Fucking World Lit Up.
>
> The entire front end of the Tonka Toy must have been spotlights. You
> could have seen it from the moon. I swear the truck slowed slightly
> under the pressure of departing photons.
>
> The oncoming wanker actually stopped (quite quickly).
>
> I laughed. A lot.
>
> Shortly afterwards I passed the Tonka Toy and gave him a big
> thumbs-up. Oddly enough, his dipped beams were totally inoffensive.
> :^)
<VBG>
--
Cab :^) - Cogito sumere potum alterum
Z1000ABS : http://www.rosbif.org/ukrm
The ALL NEW ukrm website : http://www.ukrm.info
email addy : ukrm_dot_cab_at_rosbif_dot_org
Thomas
wrote:
> So this evening I was following (at a distance) a Tonka Toy pickup along
> a road near WUNderland. We reached a long straight and I was idly
> contemplating an overtake when an oncoming car appeared.
>
> I instantly spotted the fact that he was on main-beam, and that the
> lights were those bloody awful HID jobs.
>
> Matey in the Tonka Toy gave him a quick flick of main beam as a
> reminder. To no effect. So he gave him a slightly longer one. No
> response.
>
> And then...
>
> The Whole Fucking World Lit Up.
>
> The entire front end of the Tonka Toy must have been spotlights. You
> could have seen it from the moon. I swear the truck slowed slightly
> under the pressure of departing photons.
>
> The oncoming wanker actually stopped (quite quickly).
>
> I laughed. A lot.
>
> Shortly afterwards I passed the Tonka Toy and gave him a *big*
> thumbs-up. Oddly enough, his dipped beams were totally inoffensive. :^)
I often wish I had directional remote control mirrors, so when an
idiot pulls up behind me at a stop with lights that melt my backside,
I could return the favor by directing it back at his eyes.
Grimly Curmudgeon
drugs began to take hold. I remember Thomas <keen...@gmail.com> saying
something like:
>I often wish I had directional remote control mirrors, so when an
>idiot pulls up behind me at a stop with lights that melt my backside,
>I could return the favor by directing it back at his eyes.
I used to have a fog light mounted as a reversing light wiv switch on
the dash. Did the trick.
LucretiaBorgia
<schnipp>
>
> And then...
>
> The Whole Fucking World Lit Up.
>
> The entire front end of the Tonka Toy must have been spotlights. You
> could have seen it from the moon. I swear the truck slowed slightly
> under the pressure of departing photons.
Laugh. Thanks for that. Cheered me up that has.
--
*^* Lucretia *^*
Lozzo
Had one of those on a Mini once, it worked a treat when someone
wouldn't turn his high beam off when following
--
Lozzo
Versys 650 Inter-Continental Hyperbolistic Missile , CBR600F-W racebike
in the making, TS250C, RD400F (somewhere)
BMW E46 318iSE (it's a car, not one of those 2-wheeled pieces of shite
they churn out)
Wicked Uncle Nigel
<lo...@lozzo.org.uk> typed
>Grimly Curmudgeon wrote:
>
>> We were somewhere around Barstow, on the edge of the desert, when the
>> drugs began to take hold. I remember Thomas <keen...@gmail.com>
>> saying something like:
>>
>> > I often wish I had directional remote control mirrors, so when an
>> > idiot pulls up behind me at a stop with lights that melt my
>> > backside, I could return the favor by directing it back at his eyes.
>>
>> I used to have a fog light mounted as a reversing light wiv switch on
>> the dash. Did the trick.
>
>Had one of those on a Mini once, it worked a treat when someone
>wouldn't turn his high beam off when following
I have an auto-dimming mirror. Works even better. :^)
Lozzo
> I have an auto-dimming mirror. Works even better. :^)
So do I now, but in a SO1971M you don't get such luxuries.
Fraser Johnston
"Wicked Uncle Nigel" <w...@wicked-uncle-nigel.me.uk> wrote in message
news:XI9UYxSY...@wicked-uncle-nigel.me.uk...
> So this evening I was following (at a distance) a Tonka Toy pickup along a
> road near WUNderland. We reached a long straight and I was idly contemplating
> an overtake when an oncoming car appeared.
>
> I instantly spotted the fact that he was on main-beam, and that the lights
> were those bloody awful HID jobs.
>
> Matey in the Tonka Toy gave him a quick flick of main beam as a reminder. To
> no effect. So he gave him a slightly longer one. No response.
>
> And then...
>
> The Whole Fucking World Lit Up.
>
> The entire front end of the Tonka Toy must have been spotlights. You could
> have seen it from the moon. I swear the truck slowed slightly under the
> pressure of departing photons.
>
> The oncoming wanker actually stopped (quite quickly).
>
> I laughed. A lot.
>
> Shortly afterwards I passed the Tonka Toy and gave him a *big* thumbs-up.
> Oddly enough, his dipped beams were totally inoffensive. :^)
I remember my old man doing that with a pair of Cibie super oscars. Turned out
the high beam offender was a cop car. Oh how we laughed as my old man tried to
talk his way out of it.
Fraser
SIRPip
> Grimly Curmudgeon wrote:
> > I used to have a fog light mounted as a reversing light wiv switch
> > on the dash. Did the trick.
>
> Had one of those on a Mini once, it worked a treat when someone
> wouldn't turn his high beam off when following
Aha! Mounted on the upper end of the bootlid, in the approved works
style?
I had a kiddie flash one like that at me (although not from a Mini) as
he thought my lights were a bit bright. I was on dipped beam at the
time, although my use of (then uncommon) Cibie headlights and halogen
bulbs deceived him. I educated him by bringing the other four Cibie
units into play, two of which were about level with his rear window.
He parked - somewhat unconventionally, but remarkably quickly.
--
SIRPip: B12
SIRPip
[illuminating the whole world]
> I remember my old man doing that with a pair of Cibie super oscars.
> Turned out the high beam offender was a cop car. Oh how we laughed
> as my old man tried to talk his way out of it.
Ah, Super Oscars. Great lights for their time, prolly the best
available until the mid-80s. I used to have four, mounted two-up,
two-down on angle-iron mounts sticking out from the front of the car
like scaffolding. Wrote off a nearly-new Mazda with them, when he
stopped halfway onto a roundabout when I was looking to see if I could
get out as well - and I could have and so could the car behind me, but
he decided he didn't want to, so I gave him a right good shove up the
arse.
Super Oscars had spring-mounted lenses that would retract into the
shell, given a push. The total damage to my Escort was the lights -
not broken, just creased across the backs of the shells where the
bonnet lip made contact. Made a mess of his bootlid (pushed it forward
into the bodyshell below the rear screen) and back panel, and the
bracketry took out his bumper. Written off.
The assessors didn't believe it until they had minutely inspected my
car and found there was no damage to the front end at all - but as
there was no contact, I didn't find that surprising - after all, I was
only doing about 10mph when I hit him. I had modified the bracketry to
a less aggresive format by then, mind, in light of the furore.
--
SIRPip: B12
SIRPip
> The Whole Fucking World Lit Up.
>
> The entire front end of the Tonka Toy must have been spotlights. You
> could have seen it from the moon. I swear the truck slowed slightly
> under the pressure of departing photons.
Having run the odd mobile solar system in the past, there is a
perceptible stagger when going from dip beam to realising full
illumination potential. In the days of the Alf-twincammed Escort, the
additional kilowatt of lighting caused such drag on the alternators (I
had a friend who was the absolute bollocks with car wiring (when he was
sober (which wasn't very often))) and he sorted me a second alternator
running on the other side, a split-charge system for the second battery
for the 24V start and a bank of relays for all the above set into the
dash with the jolly wonderful fusebox of his own design.
With all the switches down, flicking the stalk for main beam induced a
bang as all the relays went over together and the engine would stop if
running at less than 2000 rpm. This effect could still be felt when
doing something like crossing a junction, when I'd hit the lighting
master switch for a second to check there wasn't anything crossing our
path and then turn them back on again. Even charging along in second
gear at ~50mph and 5000 rpm, the motor would falter as the world went
white again.
>
> The oncoming wanker actually stopped (quite quickly).
>
> I laughed. A lot.
>
> Shortly afterwards I passed the Tonka Toy and gave him a big
> thumbs-up. Oddly enough, his dipped beams were totally inoffensive.
> :^)
VBG. In a vicariously smug sort of way.
--
SIRPip: B12
Gyp
> I had a kiddie flash one like that at me (although not from a Mini) as
> he thought my lights were a bit bright. I was on dipped beam at the
> time, although my use of (then uncommon) Cibie headlights and halogen
> bulbs deceived him. I educated him by bringing the other four Cibie
> units into play, two of which were about level with his rear window.
> He parked - somewhat unconventionally, but remarkably quickly.
I used to have 2 pairs of super oscars on my BX; 2 driving, 2 spot.
Still got 'em. Should ebay them really.
Remarkably good for shifting folk that were hogging the middle lane.
--
Gyp
SIRPip
Heh. Suntan on the back of the neck, Sir?
--
SIRPip: B12