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Ekimov - cycling's undead?

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RicodJour

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Jul 7, 2006, 5:52:55 PM7/7/06
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I've been putting the pieces together on Ekimov and I think I know
what's happened.

Let's look at the data:
- he's been racing for way too many years. He started serious training
28 years ago! He should be working the handle on the La-Z-Boy recliner
instead of humping up mountains.
- time trailing is the race of truth. Again, he's way too old to be
doing what's he's doing - placing well consistently for years.
- in yesterday's stage his heart rate was around 110 when almost
everyone else's was around 160+
- Bruynel says he looks like shit all of the time.

Conclusion:
He's a zombie. There was probably some problem with a transfusion and
they put it in reverse and drained him dry. He's officially the
undead.

You think blood doping is a big problem? This is way more serious.
How do you test the undead. "What's his hematocrit?" "Zero." "WTF?!"

This could cause some major problems. Imagine if they zombie-ized Eddy
in his prime. He'd still be kicking everyone's ass in the major tours,
minor tours, spring classics and probably going to local races and
kicking ass. "Who's racing today." "Eddy." "...and?" "And no one.
He turned up, everyone else went home."

I know how to kill vampires, werewolfs and certain mutants. I have no
idea how you kill (?) a zombie, but it's gotta be stopped.

R

raa...@hotmail.com

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Jul 7, 2006, 6:23:45 PM7/7/06
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I think you are being very disresectful to an accomplished and seasoned
veteran. Eki, Zabel, among others of our sport deserve better than
random dopping acusations being senselessly flung about

Tom Kunich

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Jul 7, 2006, 8:24:29 PM7/7/06
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<raa...@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1152311025.4...@s53g2000cws.googlegroups.com...

>
> I think you are being very disresectful to an accomplished and seasoned
> veteran. Eki, Zabel, among others of our sport deserve better than
> random dopping acusations being senselessly flung about

You're belittling the courage of Laff@me and his minions?


pc

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Jul 7, 2006, 8:45:33 PM7/7/06
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raa...@hotmail.com wrote:
> RicodJour wrote:
> > I've been putting the pieces together on Ekimov and I think I know
> > what's happened.
> >
>
> I think you are being very disresectful to an accomplished and seasoned
> veteran. Eki, Zabel, among others of our sport deserve better than
> random dopping acusations being senselessly flung about

Hey Noodle, I thought it was a nice homage to Eki. He's so good he's
not human...The doping angle was just for color against the non-saints
du jour.

$.02
pc

Mark

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Jul 7, 2006, 9:06:28 PM7/7/06
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RicodJour wrote:
> I've been putting the pieces together on Ekimov and I think I know
> what's happened.

[amusing zombie bit snipped]

OK, we've established that Eki is one Tour short of matching the record
for number of starts.

What's the record for number of completions? Thought I heard that he
has never abandoned - is that right?

Mark

raa...@hotmail.com

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Jul 7, 2006, 9:39:14 PM7/7/06
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If it was, then it went over my head and I apologize. (I was a bit
wrecked after a long run)

Colin Campbell

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Jul 7, 2006, 10:51:04 PM7/7/06
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Ekimov's low heart rate has the effect of making him younger by about
30%, so while he's 40, he rides as if he's 28!

Callistus Valerius

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Jul 7, 2006, 11:04:49 PM7/7/06
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> - in yesterday's stage his heart rate was around 110 when almost
> everyone else's was around 160+
> - Bruynel says he looks like shit all of the time.
>
> Conclusion:
> He's a zombie.

Did you consider that he may be mentally disturbed? It's something all
of us should look out for, if cycling takes over your life. Have you ever
ate a cliff bar for dinner, because you couldn't come up with an idea for a
real dinner? I'm talking about having a real life, not just bikes, bikes
bikes. Eki has gone over the edge, it's too late for him. But we can all
learn from his mistake. This post was very unusual for rbr, it actually
made me think.


RicodJour

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Jul 7, 2006, 11:15:55 PM7/7/06
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Callistus Valerius wrote:
> > - in yesterday's stage his heart rate was around 110 when almost
> > everyone else's was around 160+
> > - Bruynel says he looks like shit all of the time.
> >
> > Conclusion:
> > He's a zombie.
>
> Did you consider that he may be mentally disturbed?

You make that sound like a bad thing. I'd rather he was mentally
disturbed and riding a bike instead of messing up other people in any
of the myriad of ways that is done everyday.

>It's something all
> of us should look out for, if cycling takes over your life. Have you ever
> ate a cliff bar for dinner, because you couldn't come up with an idea for a
> real dinner?

Are you kidding me? I buy cases of energy bars because eating real
food is a waste of time and requires advance planning.

> I'm talking about having a real life, not just bikes, bikes
> bikes. Eki has gone over the edge, it's too late for him. But we can all
> learn from his mistake.

Fanatics are what makes the world, the world - for good and bad. I
find inspiration in his, ahem, track record.

> This post was very unusual for rbr, it actually made me think.

Sorry. ;)

R

RicodJour

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Jul 7, 2006, 11:23:54 PM7/7/06
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Hey, I should be thanking you. You gave me the biggest laugh of the
day. It hadn't really occurred to me that someone could take what I
wrote as an attack on Eki. I was literally laughing out loud. No
harm, no foul.

R

RicodJour

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Jul 7, 2006, 11:26:30 PM7/7/06
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13 out of 15. He missed one due to that endo while training with
Lance, and an earlier one where his team either folded or didn't go to
Le Tour.

R

Howard Kveck

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Jul 8, 2006, 12:52:02 AM7/8/06
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In article <lhFrg.4765$ye3....@newsread1.news.pas.earthlink.net>,
"Callistus Valerius" <jazz...@hotmail.com> wrote:

> This post was very unusual for rbr, it actually made me think.

Well, there's a first time for everything...

--
tanx,
Howard

Never take a tenant with a monkey.

remove YOUR SHOES to reply, ok?

Stu Fleming

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Jul 8, 2006, 3:53:22 AM7/8/06
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Colin Campbell wrote:
> Ekimov's low heart rate has the effect of making him younger by about
> 30%, so while he's 40, he rides as if he's 28!

But 6 months after he hangs up the wheels, he'll be dead.
Probably that is why he is keeping going as long as possible.

Ewoud Dronkert

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Jul 8, 2006, 6:27:55 AM7/8/06
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Mark schreef:

> OK, we've established that Eki is one Tour short of matching the record
> for number of starts.
>
> What's the record for number of completions? Thought I heard that he
> has never abandoned - is that right?

That's right: Joop Zoetemelk started *and* finished 16 times, including
one win, 6 second places (12 top-tens in total) and 10 stage wins.
See http://www.letour.fr/HISTO/TDF/riders/us/4076.html

He now lives in France and co-ownes a perfume brand with the
uncharacteristically loud name "Joop!"

--
E. Dronkert

excel_...@hotmail.com

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Jul 8, 2006, 11:22:20 AM7/8/06
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I don't know, I found this funny...kinda dumb, but it made me laugh
more than a little. Eki is digressing, though, just look at that
stupid mullet!

CH

excel_...@hotmail.com

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Jul 8, 2006, 11:23:01 AM7/8/06
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I don't know, I found this funny...kinda dumb, but it made me laugh
more than a little. Eki is digressing, though, just look at that
stupid mullet! Somebody should tell him him that went out when he
turned pro.

CH

Steven L. Sheffield

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Jul 8, 2006, 2:16:13 PM7/8/06
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On 7/7/06 9:26 PM, in article
1152329190.3...@75g2000cwc.googlegroups.com, "RicodJour"
<rico...@worldemail.com> wrote:


So those years would not be considered amongst his starts, dumbass ...

He has started 15 tours during his 17+ seasons as a pro. He has completed
14, and if he finishes this year, he will have completed all 15 starts.


RicodJour

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Jul 8, 2006, 3:06:37 PM7/8/06
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Quite true, I misread the question. Thanks for pointing it out.

R

Donald Munro

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Jul 9, 2006, 2:36:32 AM7/9/06
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RicodJour wrote:
> Conclusion:
> He's a zombie. There was probably some problem with a transfusion and
> they put it in reverse and drained him dry. He's officially the
> undead.

Better keep quiet about this otherwise all the teams will be zombiefying
there domestiques.

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