More Insults From Grimoire's Designer!
Timothy Dransfield
I'm not really sure what to say about this one... but he *asked* me to
post it this time, so I suppose I will.
From cl...@ans.com.au Thu Jun 12 09:53:59 1997
Date: Thu, 12 Jun 1997 12:13:46 +1000
From: Cleve Blakemore <cl...@ans.com.au>
To: Timothy Dransfield <dra...@husc.harvard.edu>
Subject: Re: Remailer Server
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* GRIMOIRE, THE ULTIMATE CRPG!!! *
"The Golden Age of Computer Roleplaying Games isn't over ... it's just
beginning!"
<cl...@ans.com.au>
<frpg-g...@geocities.com>
<http://192.216.191.21/TimesSquare/Alley/3806/>
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Are you a remail server now?
Here's another one you can post:
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AN OFFICIAL APOLOGY TO THE UNIVERSAL BROTHERHOOD OF MORONS
from Cleveland M. Blakemore
I'd like to take this opportunity to apologize to morons everywhere in the
event I may have offended anyone by attacking the competency or credibility
of "the idea-challenged" and the "reasoning-deprived" everywhere.
I recognize Tim Dransfield as a card-carrying representative of your large
and powerful union and want to say I'm sorry for making him feel like he
could not pull 75 on an IQ test if he got to do take-home research on the
questions.
If you're one of the unfortunates who has sustained a powerful blow to the
frontal lobes in the past, was deprived of oxygen at birth, born to a
mother who experimented heavily with prohibited substances before
conception or believes in your heart that professional wrestling is real
... I'd just like to take this moment to say - I'm sorry I insulted you,
morons, and I hope in the future you will consider buying the special moron
edition of GRIMOIRE, which will feature among other things:
* No full sentence communication requiring you to move your lips as you
type
* Simple punch-a-button realtime combats
* No narrative or difficult reading involved
* A standard polygon engine similar to DOOM but labeling itself an "RPG"
* Lots'n'lots'o Powerups!
* Gameplay so simple even critical patients in the last stages of
Alzenheimers can enjoy it
* A people's revolution at the end when they overthrow the evil villains
and form a collective
* Plenty o'bloodshed and nekked girls
* Mandatory massive explosion at climax to substitute for actual conclusion
and denouement
* All the moonpies and chocolate yoo-hoo you can drink
* Nothing that stimulates any gland in the body above the hypothalamus and
early reptilian brain stem
We're so serious about this port that we've called in consultants from
Stonekeep and put together a specially formed team of lowest common
denominator bootlicking weasels to try to create a game that will alienate
no one who might feel left out merely because they cannot walk and chew gum
at the same time.
Thanks ... and always remember, morons, them smart folks might have the
brains, but you've got the raw numbers.
Yours truly,
Cleve Blakemore
Senior Developer
GRIMOIRE
slink
What, no nekked guys? Shucks, I ain't buyin' that. Dial over to the
roller derby, will ya, hun?
One of the reasons that I have never gotten into writing shareware is
that I don't have the temper to deal with the public. A good
programmer is not neccesarily a good businessman, salesman, or
customer support person.
Sandra
Joel Mathis
Rumor has it dra...@fas.harvard.edu said...
>
> Thanks ... and always remember, morons, them smart folks might have the
> brains, but you've got the raw numbers.
And you are their leader.
--
Joel Mathis
"Who controls the British Crown?
Who keeps the metric system down?
We do! We do!"
Tim Iverson
In article <33a01934...@news.netins.net>, slink <sl...@netins.net> wrote:
|What, no nekked guys? Shucks, I ain't buyin' that. Dial over to the
|roller derby, will ya, hun?
|
|One of the reasons that I have never gotten into writing shareware is
|that I don't have the temper to deal with the public.
Sure you do -- you do it every time you post, usually quite apropos and
I've never once seen you stoop to name calling.
|A good programmer is not neccesarily a good businessman, salesman, or
|customer support person.
Ah, another difference of opinion. A programmer is in the business of
communicating between humans and machines. If he only gets along with half
of that set -- and it doesn't matter how well -- then he's at best only
half a programmer, and probably not capable of producing useful work.
Anyway, these postings are 2nd hand -- however much in character they
sound, I have a hard time believing Cleve is quite the idiot he claims.
Guess I'll just have to take it on faith.
- Tim Iverson
iverson@lionheart,com
Chris Smith
ive...@cisco.nospam (Tim Iverson) writes:
| I have a hard time believing Cleve is quite the idiot he claims.
| Guess I'll just have to take it on faith.
The trouble with you Germans is you have NO SENSE OF HUMOUR!!
-- Basil Fawlty
Timothy Dransfield
Joel Mathis (jma...@gate.net) wrote:
: Rumor has it dra...@fas.harvard.edu said...
: >
: > Thanks ... and always remember, morons, them smart folks might have the
: > brains, but you've got the raw numbers.
: And you are their leader.
How's that for selective snipping!?! Rumour has wrong, apparently -
that's a direct quote from Cleve, not from me. (Why would I call myself a
moron?)
Tim
Jeff Vogel
In article <5nqlhr$7u7$1...@rottweiler.cisco.com>, ive...@cisco.nospam (Tim
Iverson) wrote:
> In article <33a01934...@news.netins.net>, slink <sl...@netins.net> wrote:
> |A good programmer is not neccesarily a good businessman, salesman, or
> |customer support person.
>
> Ah, another difference of opinion. A programmer is in the business of
> communicating between humans and machines.
And, when it's what you do for a living, it's really not too hard to stay
polite and coherent. All it takes is a simple bit of self-programming.
When dealing with a user, no impoliteness. No nastiness. No losing temper
if they don't seem so bright. They're a user. They get treated special.
In person, on my own time, I am generally very acerbic and have a hair
trigger intolerance of what I perceive of as stupidity. But when a
customer is on the phone (or on the other end of my E-mail), I'm the
Stepford Jeff. Kind. Polite. Helpful.
Granted, I'm human, and am not flawlessly patient. I've occasionally had
lapses. In general, however, smiling friendliness isn't as hard to
cultivate as it may seem. Cheeriness is easy when the checks are coming
in. :-)
- Jeff Vogel, Keeper of Exile, Spiderweb Software, Inc.
Check out Exile: Escape From the Pit, Exile II: Crystal Souls,
and Exile III: Ruined World, the hit shareware rpg's for
Macintosh and Windows 3.1/95. Find them at http://www.spidweb.com
Joel Mathis
humorous add on to the comments that were provided.
slink
On Thu, 12 Jun 1997 18:24:13 -0400, jma...@gate.net (Joel Mathis)
wrote:
>Rumor has it dra...@fas.harvard.edu said...
>>
>> Thanks ... and always remember, morons, them smart folks might have the
>> brains, but you've got the raw numbers.
>
>And you are their leader.
>
>--
>Joel Mathis
>
>"Who controls the British Crown?
>Who keeps the metric system down?
>We do! We do!"
You do realize he is quoting a letter that he says was sent to him and
not stating his own opinion?
Sandra
Werner Arend
Well, do we... I must admit I fail to grasp the humorous aspect of your
post, and keep wondering what your response has to do with the original
post.... on the contrary, I found that post quite amusing, if you look
at the details...
Werner
Chris Smith
Werner Arend <kii...@commlink.zdv.uni-tuebingen.de> writes:
Sorry. It's a reference to a TV show you probably haven't seen.
The explanation isn't going to be funny, but:
- there's an old show Fawlty Towers, from the BBC, maybe around 1980
- in it John Cleese plays a hotel proprietor
(Cleese was in Monty Python too)
- in one episode he mortally offends some German tourists staying at
his hotel by making one-sided jokes -- it's very funny but they
were not amused -- then tells them they have no sense of humor
(very funny, in the circumstances, and of course it offends them
some more)
Tim Iverson
In article <Pine.HPP.3.91.97061...@commlink.zdv.uni-tuebingen.de>,
Werner Arend <kii...@commlink.zdv.uni-tuebingen.de> wrote:
|On Fri, 13 Jun 1997, Chris Smith wrote:
|> ive...@cisco.nospam (Tim Iverson) writes:
|> | I have a hard time believing Cleve is quite the idiot he claims.
|> | Guess I'll just have to take it on faith.
|>
|> The trouble with you Germans is you have NO SENSE OF HUMOUR!!
|> -- Basil Fawlty
|
|Well, do we... I must admit I fail to grasp the humorous aspect of your
|post, and keep wondering what your response has to do with the original
|post.... on the contrary, I found that post quite amusing, if you look
|at the details...
Some folks just don't get it if it's not soaking wet. Besides, I'm not
even German, and though I've been accused of it before, this is the first
time it's happened when I'm out of eyesight.
- Tim Iverson
iverson@cisco,com
NCrier
>* A people's revolution at the end when they overthrow the evil villains
>and form a collective
This has something to do with power-ups and doom clones?
Is that the explanation for the Che Guevara Swatch?
Or just an insinuation that the Grimoire will be another one of those
ground-breaking Restore-the-Dynasty, Divine-Right-of-Kings melodramas that
all true intellectuals slaver for?