Tom Cruise threatening to sue Medical Marijuana
kennethno...@gmail.com
Tom Cruise isn't getting any giggles from a new strain of medical
marijuana being marketed as "Tom Cruise Purple."
Word is that the actor's lawyers are taking a serious look at the
strong brand of bud after we brought it to their attention.
One of Cruise's friends found it "outrageous" that licensed cannabis
clubs in Northern California are selling vials of pot featuring a
picture of Cruise laughing hysterically.
Like other followers of Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard, Cruise is
opposed to the use of psychotropic drugs.
Staffers at several California clinics we called said they were
forbidden to discuss any of the herbal varieties in their "inventory."
But one weed devotee said, "I heard it's the kind of pot that makes
you hallucinate."
Meanwhile, a woman who has been identified as Cruise's former
alternative-medicine consultant is due to stand trial in L.A. Superior
Court on April 17.
A spokesman for the L.A. City Attorney's office tells us Feline
Butcher - aka Feline Kondula - has been charged with 18 counts of
unlawfully practicing medicine and one count of grand theft.
The charges stem from Butcher's treatment of Clive McLean, a cancer
patient who died in 2005.
McLean's widow, Erica McLean, tells us that Butcher, who's a
Scientologist, and another unlicensed practitioner encouraged her
husband to abandon chemotherapy in favor of a regimen of "vitamins and
'magic drops.'"
Erica McLean, who was assisted by private investigator Paul Barresi,
claims that the couple paid close to $120,000 on useless treatments.
Butcher has pleaded not guilty.
Additionally, Cruise is the unwitting star of a new spoof video in
which he's seen cavorting with the bouncing head of Hubbard and
dancing Scientologists like Kirstie Alley, Beck and John Travolta.
The video - which you can find at http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/scientolulz
- mocks the controversial church's war with Internet critics, who've
come to be known as Anonymous.
A representative for Cruise declined to comment on the video and the
"purple" pot, but insisted that Butcher "was not his adviser. He has
nothing to do with her."
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The guys and gals at circushour.com sent me a link to a great parody
they did about all of this (Check out the image):
www.circushour.com/2008/04/04/tom-cruise-goes-to-pot/
TOM CRUISE PURPLE (as reported by the NY Daily News)
Generic name: xenujuana
DESCRIPTION
Medical marijuana sold in vials featuring a picture of Tom Cruise
laughing hysterically. Also known as most every picture taken of Tom
Cruise. Distributed by licensed cannabis clubs in Northern California.
INDICATIONS
An antiemetic for the treatment of nausea and anorexia associated with
treatments for cancer, AIDS, and hepatitis. Tom Cruise Purple also
treats people who demonstrate signs of normalcy and turns them into
laughing loons.
RECOMMENDED DOSAGE
Enough to make patients speak solely in unintelligible acronyms.
SIDE EFFECTS
God complex; alien worship; couch-jumping; bowl haircut that spreads
to rest of family; cackling; loss of respect; aversion to psychiatry;
homophobia; sudden ability to be only person who can help with
accidents and control forces of nature.