You MONSTERS!
Axe-Wielding Fuddite
I have in front of me a can of SPAM. Reading the back turned up this little
gem:
"To order SPAM(tm) Mechandise and Apparel call 1-800-LUV-SPAM."
LUV-SPAM?!?!!!
Have you monsters *no* decency? Not one speck of respect for honor or
language or anything? You dare to mark the coffins of noble, fallen
Fudds with... this?!
We also note the new verb created by Hormel: "Spambled". Pronounced like
Scrambled. As in, "Oh, that batch of Fudds has already been Spambled."
C'mon, Steekman. Tell me again why I should tolerate symps.
--
And did you all notice there is *no expiration date* on SPAM cans?
Yet more proof of the nanotech used to create the stuff. *Normal*
foods decay! Want more details? 1-800-523-4635. 8-12am&1-4pm CST.
Chaos
Snug "Nyuck nyuck nyuck" Fuzz wrote:>Wow. Most Fudds wouldn't want a can of SPAM in their house. I guess
>your're just more open-minded then most. >:)
>
>Most people I ask say they don't like SPAM, but have never *tried* it.
>As posters or lurkers on the group, I believe that (much in the same
>way that you must try Moxie, if your are able), you must consume SPAM
>before making any remarks about it. [stomp]
So, you're saying that people must experience cannabalism before they
can find it distasteful?
-Chaos
He does the work of three men. Larry, Moe, and Curley.
Ceredwyn Bensley
ga...@z-ha-dum.demon.co.uk (Garry Bunny) writes:
>The Mighty Axe-Wielding Fuddite says
>>We also note the new verb created by Hormel: "Spambled". Pronounced like
>>Scrambled. As in, "Oh, that batch of Fudds has already been Spambled."
<horrifiedlook>
"G@rry?"
<shakeshead>
"G@rry? Y()u've been @w@y. M@ybe...m@ybe y0ur nerve$ @re
$tr@1ned...the G@rry ! knew w()uldn't $@y th0$e th1ng$."
<worriedsmile>
"Why d0n't y()u c@lm d0wn? D0 y0u w@nt t0 he@r @b0ut my k1t$? I'm @
f@m1ly D()e, n0w..."
^ ^ The Sibyl.
\\// Garry...
{--} What's gone wrong?
[] +==+----oo-oo--+ Web Page :http://www-mugc.cc.monash.edu.au/~clben1
[]===|==| | | | ||)----------- De$tr()y the Ev!l! Get the F@Q fr0m:
[] +==+-----------+ http://www.xmission.com/~snowhare *n0w*!
Snug Fuzz
The Comedy Team from Hell <ct...@netcom.com> wrote:
[...]
> Certainly not with your banter abilities.^K
> We all just assumed that they leased ShortHare out.^K
> Selling their companions to NIMH?^K
> Exotic Dancing? <looks at recon picture of Garry> Oh. Sorry, my
> mistake. ;)^K^K
[...]
> (For the PPP-winps: in some UNIX editors, "^K" deletes the line. This
> has been a public service announcement.
[giggle] You call Pico an editor!?! [rolls over] Vi is an editor.
*Emacs* is an editor! But pico? [chortle]
> And keep those damned line lengths to 72.)
Actually, for best reading experience, you should keep lines to
eleven words or so. (Less, even, then your figure!)
Snug
,--- 'Course, I just can use BBEdit on my handy-dandy
| Mac and save files directly to/from my account...
`---------------------------------------------------------------------
Check out our homepage on the World Wide Warren: Online home of the
http://www-unix.oit.umass.edu/~dougmacd/alt.dbs/ alt.dbs Who's Who!
Christopher Hemme
Chaos (ka...@ldd.net) wrote:
->Snug "Nyuck nyuck nyuck" Fuzz wrote:
->>
->>Most people I ask say they don't like SPAM, but have never *tried* it.
->>As posters or lurkers on the group, I believe that (much in the same
->>way that you must try Moxie, if your are able), you must consume SPAM
->>before making any remarks about it. [stomp]
->So, you're saying that people must experience cannabalism before they
->can find it distasteful?
Don't knock it until you've tried it.
==
Lenny, TechnoMage
The Comedy Team from Hell
On Thu, 18 Jul 1996, Garry Bunny (sigh) wrote:
> The Mighty Axe-Wielding Fuddite says
>
> money?
Certainly not with your banter abilities.^K
We all just assumed that they leased ShortHare out.^K
Selling their companions to NIMH?^K
Exotic Dancing? <looks at recon picture of Garry> Oh. Sorry, my
mistake. ;)^K^K
<siiiiiggghhh>
Decisions, decisions, decisions.
Eric
(For the PPP-winps: in some UNIX editors, "^K" deletes the line. This
has been a public service announcement. And keep those damned line
lengths to 72.)
Snug Fuzz
ka...@ldd.net (Chaos "NoBunny's got it right with name-calling") wrote:
> Snug "Nyuck nyuck nyuck" Fuzz wrote:
>> Most people I ask say they don't like SPAM, but have never *tried* it.
>> As posters or lurkers on the group, I believe that (much in the same
>> way that you must try Moxie, if your are able), you must consume SPAM
>> before making any remarks about it. [stomp]
> So, you're saying that people must experience cannabalism before they
> can find it distasteful?
Well, you bloody well don't know if it is canabalism or not, right?
None of you have have any first-person, direct, can-in-front-of-you,
SPAM-on-your-burger experience, have you?
You're just buying into this "SPAM is people" propaganda without
checking it out for yourselves.
Now, I understand you can't go testing every claim, but this one's
pretty simple! Just buy some. Try it. Test it. No test to date
have conclusively proven human content in SPAM. And there's a
darn good reason! [wiggle]
> He does the work of three men. Larry, Moe, and Curley.
Those... things, are not men. And neither are the creatures that
find them amusing. [stomp]
Snug
,--- It's SPAM, not soylent green, people!
Chaos
Lenny, Whoknowswhat wrote:
>Chaos (ka...@ldd.net) wrote:
>->Snug "Nyuck nyuck nyuck" Fuzz wrote:
>->>Most people I ask say they don't like SPAM, but have never *tried* it.
>->>As posters or lurkers on the group, I believe that (much in the same
>->>way that you must try Moxie, if your are able), you must consume SPAM
>->>before making any remarks about it. [stomp]
>->So, you're saying that people must experience cannabalism before they
>->can find it distasteful?
> Don't knock it until you've tried it.
All right, Lenny, if you ingest large quantities of strychnine, I'll
try Spam.
-Chaos
"I find your lack of a clue disturbing." Darth Vader replied to the
choking newbie, who suggested the Dark SysAdmin use a TRS-80 as a
file server.
Geoffrey Brent
>> So, you're saying that people must experience cannabalism before they
>Well, you bloody well don't know if it is canabalism or not, right?
He's getting agitated...
>Now, I understand you can't go testing every claim, but this one's
>pretty simple! Just buy some. Try it. Test it. No test to date
>have conclusively proven human content in SPAM. And there's a
>darn good reason! [wiggle]
The same reason no test has conclusively proven that smoking causes
cancer ? Science cannot _conclusively_ prove things, as you well know.
Just what evidence _would_ you accept, Snug ?
Art Black
--
gbr...@rschp1.anu.edu.au
Snug Fuzz
ka...@ldd.net (Chaos) wrote:
>Spam Fuzz wrote:
I'm beginning to understand the sort of material that NoBunny has to
deal with...
>>Well, you bloody well don't know if it is canabalism or not, right?
>Sometimes yes, sometimes no. The (very good) possibility that it /is/
>canabalism is reason enough for me to avoid it.
Isn't there a very real possibility you will die as a direct result
of your involvement with the war? Perhaps you should avoid that, too!
[hophop]
><ShakeHead> Even without the canabalism concerns, just look at the
>stuff! Half-gelled pink stuff oozing on the plate...reminds of dog
>food.
And boy did *that* taste bad, right? [giggle] Hey! Here's an idea!
Why don't you try... Cooking it? [poof]
(The SPAM, I mean)
>I notice you never actually /denied/ that Spam is made from human
>parts.
Go check the archives, again, buddy. [giggle]
>>[...] No test to date have conclusively proven human content in SPAM.
>>And there's a darn good reason! [wiggle]
>No one's tried DNA testing.
Yes they have! [bounce] "No conclusive results [...]"!
><Nod> Well, that and the possibility that not /every/ can is...was human.
And indeed, that *no* can is human.
>>> He does the work of three men. Larry, Moe, and Curley.
>>Those... things, are not men. And neither are the creatures that
>>find them amusing. [stomp]
>And neither are you. <InnocentWhistle>
At least it's because I'm a lil' bunny, instead of a stooge like yourself.
>>,--- It's SPAM, not soylent green, people!
>That's right, it's soylent pink.
"I'm pork and ham, said SPAM-I-am".
>-Chaos
> A balanced meal means you have a 50/50 chance of recovering.
"Try a SPAMburger(R) sandwich! Slice SPAM(R) luncheon meat into
3-6 square slices. Pan-fry, broil, or grill until lightly browned.
Serve on bun with lettuce, tomato, mayonaise and cheese."
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Snug
,--- You really think we'd make something with instructions like that?
Chaos
>>> Most people I ask say they don't like SPAM, but have never *tried* it.
>> can find it distasteful?
Sometimes yes, sometimes no. The (very good) possibility that it /is/
canabalism is reason enough for me to avoid it.
>None of you have have any first-person, direct, can-in-front-of-you,
>SPAM-on-your-burger experience, have you?
<ShakeHead> Even without the canabalism concerns, just look at the
stuff! Half-gelled pink stuff oozing on the plate...reminds of dog
food.
>You're just buying into this "SPAM is people" propaganda without
>checking it out for yourselves.
I notice you never actually /denied/ that Spam is made from human
parts.
>Now, I understand you can't go testing every claim, but this one's
>pretty simple! Just buy some. Try it. Test it. No test to date
>have conclusively proven human content in SPAM. And there's a
>darn good reason! [wiggle]
No one's tried DNA testing. <Nod> Well, that and the possibility
that not /every/ can is...was human.
>> He does the work of three men. Larry, Moe, and Curley.
>Those... things, are not men. And neither are the creatures that
>find them amusing. [stomp]
And neither are you. <InnocentWhistle>
>Snug
>,--- It's SPAM, not soylent green, people!
That's right, it's soylent pink.
-Chaos
Chaos
Three of Fuzz wrote:
>ka...@ldd.net (Chaos) wrote:
>>Spam Fuzz wrote:
>I'm beginning to understand the sort of material that NoBunny has to
>deal with...
Well, the closer I can push you to thinking like NoBunny...
>>>Well, you bloody well don't know if it is canabalism or not, right?
>>Sometimes yes, sometimes no. The (very good) possibility that it /is/
>>canabalism is reason enough for me to avoid it.
>Isn't there a very real possibility you will die as a direct result
>of your involvement with the war?
<Shrug> Yes. That doesn't mean I'll abandon all my morals for it
though. That's what would happen at my first bite of Spam.
>Perhaps you should avoid that, too! [hophop]
I'm...touched how concerned you are with my life. Go 'way, bun, you
bother, I say, you bother me.
>><ShakeHead> Even without the canabalism concerns, just look at the
>>stuff! Half-gelled pink stuff oozing on the plate...reminds of dog
>>food.
>And boy did *that* taste bad, right? [giggle]
Nah. tasted kinda like chicken. Or rattlesnake. Or...<Shrug>
Better than garden slugs though. Crunchier.
>Hey! Here's an idea! Why don't you try... Cooking it? [poof]
>(The SPAM, I mean)
And the advantage of this would be...?
>>I notice you never actually /denied/ that Spam is made from human
>>parts.
>Go check the archives, again, buddy. [giggle]
But they're so...intimidating! Can't you just deny it here? I'd be
ever-so-greatful. <WidePleadingInnocentEyes>
>>>[...] No test to date have conclusively proven human content in SPAM.
>>>And there's a darn good reason! [wiggle]
>>No one's tried DNA testing.
>Yes they have! [bounce] "No conclusive results [...]"!
Why does Spam having no recognizable genetic signature not reassure
me?
>><Nod> Well, that and the possibility that not /every/ can is...was human.
>And indeed, that *no* can is human.
I'm sure some dust gets into the tins in the packing process. You
/do/ know what most dust is composed of, don't you? :)
>>>> He does the work of three men. Larry, Moe, and Curley.
>>>Those... things, are not men. And neither are the creatures that
>>>find them amusing. [stomp]
>>And neither are you. <InnocentWhistle>
>At least it's because I'm a lil' bunny, instead of a stooge like yourself.
Oh, a wisebun, eh? I'll bet you even prefer disco over the Curley
Shuffle.
>>>,--- It's SPAM, not soylent green, people!
>>That's right, it's soylent pink.
>"I'm pork and ham, said SPAM-I-am".
I will not eat that Spammish meat
And no, I also won't eat Treet.
I will not eat that stuff for fun
Crunchy, raw, or on a bun.
I do not like this processed meat
And it, of course, I will not eat.
>> A balanced meal means you have a 50/50 chance of recovering.
>"Try a SPAMburger(R) sandwich! Slice SPAM(R) luncheon meat into
>3-6 square slices. Pan-fry, broil, or grill until lightly browned.
>Serve on bun with lettuce, tomato, mayonaise and cheese."
>^^^^^^^^^^^^
Can I have a volunteer?
>Snug
>,--- You really think we'd make something with instructions like that?
Sure, if the only people who understood its true meaning knew how
inedible Devilbunnies truly are.
-Chaos
Highly unnatural
The tortured shape of this "food"
A small pink coffin
Axe-Wielding Fuddite
In alt.devilbunnies, sn...@caerbannog.drg.com (Snug Fuzz) wrote:
<"Try a SPAMburger(R) sandwich! Slice SPAM(R) luncheon meat into
<3-6 square slices. Pan-fry, broil, or grill until lightly browned.
<Serve on bun with lettuce, tomato, mayonaise and cheese."
<^^^^^^^^^^^^
<You really think we'd make something with instructions like that?
NoBunny *certainly* would.
Christopher Hemme
Snug Fuzz (sn...@caerbannog.drg.com) wrote:
->Well, you bloody well don't know if it is canabalism or not, right?
->None of you have have any first-person, direct, can-in-front-of-you,
->SPAM-on-your-burger experience, have you?
->You're just buying into this "SPAM is people" propaganda without
->checking it out for yourselves.
Wouldn't cannibalism increase the carrying capacity? Not that
I'm condoning it or anything...
->Now, I understand you can't go testing every claim, but this one's
->pretty simple! Just buy some. Try it. Test it. No test to date
->have conclusively proven human content in SPAM. And there's a
->darn good reason! [wiggle]
Tastes like chicken!
->> He does the work of three men. Larry, Moe, and Curley.
->Those... things, are not men. And neither are the creatures that
->find them amusing. [stomp]
Hey!
==
Lenny, TechnoMage
woowoowoowoowoo!
The Colective
snuggles wrote:
> [giggle] You call Pico an editor!?! [rolls over] Vi is an editor.
> *Emacs* is an editor! But pico? [chortle]
<grynfluff> personaly i think they're all elvis......
___________
Cuddlebunni - "ya know, there are times when a bit of distance can be `a
good thing'"
Garry Bunny
The Comedy Team from Hell <ct...@netcom.com> writes:
>
> On Thu, 18 Jul 1996, Garry Bunny (sigh) wrote:
> > The Mighty Axe-Wielding Fuddite says
> > >"To order SPAM(tm) Mechandise and Apparel call 1-800-LUV-SPAM."
> >
> > Of course [stomp], how do you think some civillian warrens make their
> > money?
>
> Certainly not with your banter abilities.^K
But by your wit!
> We all just assumed that they leased ShortHare out.^K
Not nice, no fair!
> Selling their companions to NIMH?^K
Who? Where? Why? When? If I find them I'll kill them
with my own little paws.
> Exotic Dancing? <looks at recon picture of Garry> Oh. Sorry, my
> mistake. ;)^K^K
You must have missed my great belly dancing routine!
> <siiiiiggghhh>
>
> Decisions, decisions, decisions.
Only for you, and you're a self confessed split personnality!
Garry Bunny
My split personnality was caused by humans!
--
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
|In the beginning there was nothing, |alt.devilbunnies |
|and Lord Frith said "LET THERE BE BUNNS", |Want to know more? Then get |
|and there was. He gazed upon the Bunns |the FAQs from; |
|and said, "THEY ARE KYOOOOT". |http://www.xmission.com/~snowhare|
| Genebun 1:1 | |
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Garry Bunny
The Sibyl writes:
> >>Scrambled. As in, "Oh, that batch of Fudds has already been Spambled."
> > Yes, you have used it in the right context, but which batch is next?
>
> <horrifiedlook>
> "G@rry?"
Sibyl?
> <shakeshead>
> "G@rry? Y()u've been @w@y. M@ybe...m@ybe y0ur nerve$ @re
> $tr@1ned...the G@rry ! knew w()uldn't $@y th0$e th1ng$."
> <worriedsmile>
My dear, yes I've been away! I have had a short stay with Daphnie
and then a long period of rest and recouperation(sp?) bach home at Sidlaw
Warren in Scotland. My nerves were a bit strained, I had so much to think
about, so much to do, and too many eyes turned in my direction, but I'm
better now, much better!
**************************************
Tightbeam engaged En*crypt*ion engaged
I only say these thing to get your attention. If I had of returned
flairing tightbeams to you and the rest of The Four then I would have been
spotted straight away. Then one night I would recieve a visit Black Battalion
troops, and I would disapear.
How goes the war? Do the tides of victory flow our way yet? How is
your intended, and when is the happy day? Is there anything I can do for you
and The rest of The Four?
Tightbeam disengaged En*crypt*ion disengaged
********************************************
> "Why d0n't y()u c@lm d0wn? D0 y0u w@nt t0 he@r @b0ut my k1t$? I'm @
> f@m1ly D()e, n0w..."
I will calm down now that I know you are still at large. Kits?
I would love to hear about them. Maybe one day I could meet them? It
is the one thing I wish, to be the proud father of a nice litter of kits!
>
> ^ ^ The Sibyl.
> \\// Garry...
> {--} What's gone wrong?
> [] +==+----oo-oo--+ Web Page :http://www-mugc.cc.monash.edu.au/~clben1
> []===|==| | | | ||)----------- De$tr()y the Ev!l! Get the F@Q fr0m:
> [] +==+-----------+ http://www.xmission.com/~snowhare *n0w*!
>
Garry Bunny
Nothing wrong here
Nothing to see
Move along
jdon...@seanetters.org
On Thu, 25 Jul 1996, Garry Bunny wrote:
> My split personnality was caused by humans!
And with a very minor surgical procedure we can finish the
"split", fluffer.
"Won't hurt a bit."
--
Captain James "Jimmy" Donohoe
Coastal Anti-Fluffer Sea Patrol
Benny Harbor, California, USA
The Comedy Team from Hell
On Thu, 25 Jul 1996, Garry Bunny wrote:
> > Certainly not with your banter abilities.^K
> But by your wit!
As opposed to your half-a-wit? :)
> > We all just assumed that they leased ShortHare out.^K
> Not nice, no fair!
<loftylook>
The truth is sure defense against claims of libel. ;)
> > Exotic Dancing? <looks at recon picture of Garry> Oh. Sorry, my
> > mistake. ;)^K^K
> You must have missed my great belly dancing routine!
<looks at recon picture again>
Sort of like a tub of lard with a vibrator underneath it? :) I'll pass,
thanks. :p
Eric
Garry Bunny
>
> And with a very minor surgical procedure we can finish the
> "split", fluffer.
And you think that you are able? I think not, I have
some powerful friends, at least two of which are with me at all
times. They always are in the shadows!
> "Won't hurt a bit."
Not me anyhow, but it may be distasteful to your comrades
who find your remains!
Garry Bunny
Who needs Vorlons
When there are
Shadows
Garry Bunny
>
> > > Certainly not with your banter abilities.^K
> > But by your wit!
> As opposed to your half-a-wit? :)
Don't you meam 'Wit-and-a-half
> > > We all just assumed that they leased ShortHare out.^K
> > Not nice, no fair!
> <loftylook>
> The truth is sure defense against claims of libel. ;)
Ooooohhhh Yessssss. ;)
> > > Exotic Dancing? <looks at recon picture of Garry> Oh. Sorry, my
> > > mistake. ;)^K^K
> > You must have missed my great belly dancing routine!
> <looks at recon picture again>
> Sort of like a tub of lard with a vibrator underneath it? :) I'll pass,
> thanks. :p
Where *did* you get that picture, it must be just a bit out of date
my friend. You should jet you informants to try to get a better, newer
one. Or maybe one day you'll see for yourself, as I visit amoung your
troops!
Garry Bunny
Oh, that picture 8o
Geoffrey Brent
>> > We all just assumed that they leased ShortHare out.^K
>> Not nice, no fair!
><loftylook>
>
>The truth is sure defense against claims of libel. ;)
Bzzt. Have to be able to prove that it was in the public interest...
Art Black
Fourier
--
gbr...@rschp1.anu.edu.au
The Comedy Team from Hell
Geoffrey Brent (gbr...@rsc.anu.edu.au) wrote:
: >> > We all just assumed that they leased ShortHare out.^K
: >> Not nice, no fair!
: >The truth is sure defense against claims of libel. ;)
: Bzzt. Have to be able to prove that it was in the public interest...
Then in this case it *certainly* qualifies. :)
Eric
--
Whatever is not nailed down is mine. What I can pry loose is not
nailed down.
-- Collis P. Huntingdon