American Pie 70's (song parody)
David Cassel
A long long time ago,
I can still remember how the nation lost its grip on style...
They told us if we got a hold,
we would never gro-w old
and maybe we'd be happy for a while.
But Grandpa Walton made me shiver
with every cliche he'd deliver.
Sitcom's on the airwaves
and overdoser's rare graves.
I can't remember if I cried when they
told me that Sid Vicious died,
but something touched me deep inside
the day the culture died.
So bye bye to the cultural lie,
drove my culture through the mulcher but the culture was dry,
and a man named Brady couldn't look me in the eye
saying this is the decade when it died--
this is the decade when it died.
Pet rocks, pop rocks, lava lamps.
Cher sang "Gypsies Thieves and Tramps",
and Carter hosted call-in shows.
Shaun and David Cassidy
and one Guyana tragedy.
Mood rings, CB radio's...
It was drugs and rock and roll and sex:
A note to generation X
Knock-knocking on the door
of Studio 54!
Escape, ignore, they told us to.
Captain Steubing and Tattoo,
Pink Lady got their own show too
The day the culture died.
So bye bye to the cultural lie,
drove my culture through the mulcher but the culture was dry,
and a man named Brady couldn't look me in the eye
saying this is the decade when it died--
this is the decade when it died.
Even before the dawn of KISS--
the Knights in Satan's Ser-vice --
bad portents were in the air.
The Exorcist, parts one and two,
Rosemary's Baby, Omen II
The Stairway to Heaven wasn't there...
So this is now and that was then--
Michael Jackson--sang the theme to "Ben".
Disaster seemed to be
Our only destiny.
There was Airport I (and II, and III--
about the Concorde SST...)
It was Heston with George Kennedy
the day the culture died.
So bye bye to the cultural lie,
drove my culture through the mulcher but the culture was dry,
and a man named Brady couldn't look me in the eye
saying this is the decade when it died--
this is the decade when it died.
Carly, Taylor, Croce, Bread
and tours by the Grateful Dead--
Gordon Lightfoot, Firefall...
The things we tried to rise above
with "Disco Duck" and "Muskrat Love",
"Car Wash", "Bad Girls", and "The Wall"...
We found there was no going back.
Billy Carter, Billy Jack...
All heroes had to be
post-modern and anti-
There was Kojak, Kolchak, and Kung Fu,
Walking Tall, Parts I and II
and ABBA sang of Waterloo
the day the culture died.
So bye bye to the cultural lie,
drove my culture through the mulcher but the culture was dry,
and a man named Brady couldn't look me in the eye
saying this is the decade when it died--
this is the decade when it died.
To purple hair from Purple Haze,
From Nancy Spugen to Nancy's gaze...
John Anderson was appalled.
We wondered what to make of it.
We learned a new word--"deficit."
The missiles could always be recalled...
The pendulum swung back, you see.
We reaped the boomer legacy.
Sid Vicious told the truth:
No future for the youth!
And while Lennon met a fan named Mark,
and got a plaque near Central Park,
the outlook went from grey to dark
the day the culture died.
So bye bye to the cultural lie
drove my culture through the mulcher but the culture was dry
and a man named Brady couldn't look me in the eye
saying this is the decade when it died--
this is the decade when it died.
I met a punk at a record store,
and asked him what he'd fight on for,
but he just glared and walked away.
And I went back to my old hometown,
where the Chrysler plant had been shut down,
but everything had gone away...
And in our hearts, a decade past.
Our adolescent visions flashed.
With nothing to hang on to.
The heroes all were gone too.
And if culture's god's a kid's signpost,
They left us with a bad guest host.
I thought I saw Kurt Cobain's ghost
the day
the culture
died.
So bye bye to the cultural lie
drove my culture through the mulcher but the culture was dry,
and a man named Brady couldn't look me in the eye
saying this is the decade when it died--
this is the decade when it died.
Bye bye to the cultural lie
drove my culture through the mulcher but the culture was dry,
and a man named Brady couldn't look me in the eye
saying this is the decade when it died.
[copyright belongs to me.]
des...@crl.com . . . . . . .
. . . Two captains. One destiny . .
. . . . . . * .
"It was fun." . . . . .
Rootbeer Friend
>srkl...@ellis.uchicago.edu (steven r kleinedler) writes:
>>In article <1994Nov22....@galileo.cc.rochester.edu> akts...@uhura.cc.rochester.edu (Adam Keats) writes:
>>>Anybody up to the challenge of creating a version for the '80s??
>>>
>>Well, here's my Techno 90s version:
>I think if you want to make it more of a 90s techno/industrial/angst trip
>kinda thing, it should be changed to:
>This'll be the day that I die
>This'll be the day that YOU die
>This'll be the day we ALL die
>DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE AH HAHAHA HAHAH HAHAHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAA....
>[sound of scraping metal]
Actually, it'd probably be more like this:
(In the spirit of nearly every lead singer of an industrial band except Steve
Mallinder)
(raspy monster voice)
Nis-sid te ben od RAAAAAAAAAGH!
It spen mintendo RAAAAAAAGH!
Nib nib I wanton banker
Chalbo root mesek mestanker
(screechy Exorcist voice)
I nooo da weeble sam de beacho YIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEE...
Coming Soon: The World Wide Web Jack Chick Archive!
Send comments/contributions to v...@teleport.com or
dej...@athmail1.causeway.qub.ac.uk.
<a href="mailto:dej...@athmail1.causeway.qub.ac.uk">..</a>
Adam Keats
steven r kleinedler
>
Well, here's my Techno 90s version:
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
[intro reverb bass beat and snazzy riff]
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die [the levee was dry]
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die [the levee was dry]
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die [the levee was dry]
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die [the levee was dry]
This'll be the day that I die
[and repeat/remix]
--
Steve Kleinedler, genx-icographer (and his stuffed moose, Kozmo)
Laura Zurawski
>In article <1994Nov22....@galileo.cc.rochester.edu> akts...@uhura.cc.rochester.edu (Adam Keats) writes:
>>Anybody up to the challenge of creating a version for the '80s??
>>
>Well, here's my Techno 90s version:
>This'll be the day that I die
>This'll be the day that I die
>This'll be the day that I die
I think if you want to make it more of a 90s techno/industrial/angst trip
kinda thing, it should be changed to:
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that YOU die
This'll be the day we ALL die
DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE AH HAHAHA HAHAH HAHAHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAA....
[sound of scraping metal]
--L.
--
"Al Gore is an inspiration to the millions of Americans
who suffer from Dutch elm disease." - Al Gore
--> DISCLAIMER: My opinions do not represent those of CCSO. So there. <--
(l)Laura Zurawski --> jun...@uiuc.edu --> University of Illinois
Steve Heckman
Laura Zurawski <jun...@uiuc.edu> writes:
srkl...@ellis.uchicago.edu (steven r kleinedler) writes:
>In article <1994Nov22....@galileo.cc.rochester.edu> akts...@uhura.cc.rochester.edu (Adam Keats) writes:
>>Anybody up to the challenge of creating a version for the '80s??
>>
>Well, here's my Techno 90s version:
>This'll be the day that I die
>This'll be the day that I die
>This'll be the day that I die
I think if you want to make it more of a 90s techno/industrial/angst trip
kinda thing, it should be changed to:
This'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that YOU die
This'll be the day we ALL die
DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE AH HAHAHA HAHAH HAHAHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAA....
[sound of scraping metal]
____
___ .-~. /_"-._
`-._~-. / /_ "~o\ :Y
\ \ / : \~x. ` ')
] Y / | Y< ~-.__j DIE BARNEY! DIE!
/ ! _.--~T : l l< /.-~ /
/ / ____.--~ . ` l /~\ \<|Y ~~~~~
/ / .-~~" /| . ',-~\ \L|
/ / / .^ \ Y~Y \.^>/l_ "--'
/ Y .-"( . l__ j_j l_/ /~_.-~ .
Y l / \ ) ~~~." / `/"~ / \.__/l_
| \ _.-" ~-{__ l : l._Z~-.___.--~
| ~---~ / ~~"---\_ ' __[>
l . _.^ ___ _>-y~
\ \ . .-~ .-~ ~>--" / __ I love you...
\ ~---" / ./ _.-' / oo\ /
"-.,_____.,_ _.--~\ _.-~ _.( .\..| _
~~ ( _} (_ \\_\==//_)
`. ~( \| | \_/
) \ /.\_//
/,`--'~\--'~\ \) L)
-------------\
-vehement "How do ya like the Jurascii, Zurawski?" sack
Laura Zurawski
> ___ .-~. /_"-._
> `-._~-. / /_ "~o\ :Y
> \ \ / : \~x. ` ')
> ] Y / | Y< ~-.__j DIE BARNEY! DIE!
> / ! _.--~T : l l< /.-~ /
> / / ____.--~ . ` l /~\ \<|Y ~~~~~
> / / .-~~" /| . ',-~\ \L|
> / / / .^ \ Y~Y \.^>/l_ "--'
> / Y .-"( . l__ j_j l_/ /~_.-~ .
> Y l / \ ) ~~~." / `/"~ / \.__/l_
> | \ _.-" ~-{__ l : l._Z~-.___.--~
> | ~---~ / ~~"---\_ ' __[>
> l . _.^ ___ _>-y~
> \ \ . .-~ .-~ ~>--" / __ I love you...
> \ ~---" / ./ _.-' / oo\ /
> "-.,_____.,_ _.--~\ _.-~ _.( .\..| _
> ~~ ( _} (_ \\_\==//_)
> `. ~( \| | \_/
> ) \ /.\_//
> /,`--'~\--'~\ \) L)
> -------------\
>-vehement "How do ya like the Jurascii, Zurawski?" sack
Bwahahahhahahahahhahahaaaaaaaaaa....
Oh, excuse me. Jurascii... HAHAHHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAAAA HEHEEEE HEE HEE HEEE
HEHEHEHEHEEEEEEH HEEEE... HOHOHOHO HHOOOOOO... oh sorry... *snicker* *snik*
[*boom*] (l)Laura explodes.
Laura Zurawski
>(raspy monster voice)
>Nis-sid te ben od RAAAAAAAAAGH!
>It spen mintendo RAAAAAAAGH!
>Nib nib I wanton banker
>Chalbo root mesek mestanker
>(screechy Exorcist voice)
>I nooo da weeble sam de beacho YIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEE...
You don't WANT to see this in Rot-13.