A DAY IN THE LIFE ...
Ag@whd
06:30 Wake up and lie awake in bed.
06:31 Realise you spent ś18 on last night's dinner, means no
eating out for the next 6 weeks.
06:32 Hit snooze button. Go back to sleep.
07:00 Wake up suddenly with heart in mouth when you realise
you didn't hit the snooze button - you turned it off.
07:01 Fall asleep again.
07:44 Wake up with heart in mouth again.
07:45 Ready to go to work, will shave tom morrow, will eat early
brunch at (McDonalds/Burger King/Cafe)
08:03 Arrive at work. Realise your foreign office mate arrived
earlier today and must have got more work done.
08:04 Pass by Manager's office, chat with Secretary to find out
if he is coming in today. He is, damn it.
Need to start work on the project due this afternoon.
08:15 Read electronic mail.
08:20 Delete mail from everyone about selling cars/junk.
Hate your job.
Depression: too much work to do today.
09:00 For jumpstart: go to Coke/Coffee machine.
09:05 Kick Coke/Coffee machine; promise yourself to call up the
company and ask for your money back. Wonder why they would
believe you.
09:33 Start printing out loads of stuff that may be vaguely
related to your work.
09:41 Early morning stupefaction.
Mutter racist comments to yourself about your office mate.
09:43 Curse your office mate in a low tone he/she would not
comprehend. Feel good about him/her not grasping English
well.
09:58 Finger everyone in the department and most people half way
around the world (using the "finger" command, of course).
10:19 Feel sleepy, should not have stayed late playing DOOM last
night.
10:31 Momentary panic attack!!!!!!!!
10:43 Edit .plan file. write a shell program to edit .plan more
easily.
10:59 Drop in at Manager's office and borrow something you don't
need and kinda make him aware you are working hard on your
project.
11:05 Perverted daydreams
11:11 Read electronic news. Mid-morning yawn time.
11:34 Start typing junk at a very high key-in rate to pretend
you are working hard as your Manager passes by from
outside.
11:35 Press the BackSpace key for one and a half minutes until
all the garbage you typed in is erased. Realise that you
can type more than 256 characters per half minute.
11:41 Flirt with the new girl in the department.
11:45 Print out some slides for afternoon's draft and
presentation.
11:47 Print them again, you forgot to change the date from last
presentation.
11:49 Print another copy in case this one gets lost.
11:51 Completely forget about sueing the coffee machine
company.
12:15 Hunger pangs: 12:20 BigMac/Fries/Pizza time. Drink a
not-so-cold generic can of Cola from your desk. Ch-Ching,
you just saved 35 pence by buying bulk Cola from the
Supermarket.
13:00 Group Meeting with Manager.
13:14 Sudden awareness of one's shallowness resentment towards
foreign office mate for sucking up to your Manager. Get
reminded by your Manager that you need to do some more
work in future.
13:51 Manager hands you the reddened copy of your draft for
corrections.
13:51:02 The 49 second urge to murder manager begins!!
13:51:52 Realise that he/she controls your employment/all job
opportunities and the rest of your life.
13:52:53 Thank him/her
13:52:54 Thank yourself for not saying something stupid to your
manager.
13:53:00 Splitting headache #1
13:59 Check electronic mail, don't reply though, you are too busy
to do that.
14:06 More generic Coke/Coffee.
14:17 Oh No, it is my turn to cook tonight :-(
14:30 Sit through the presentation (pension?) you were told to
sit through.
14:39 Look outside the window make unrealistic plans to quit
this position and take up a decent job. Wonder why blonde
girls are so pretty.
14:48 More perverted day-dreams. Close office door and open a
few .gif files. Sharpen pencil.
15:06 Worry about never finishing project. Time to write a
letter--NOT! No time for that. Rearrange desk. Call up
bank, see if you have any money. Fear of losing bonus
next season. Read latex manuals to figure out how to put
&$%&% in %$^% format.
15:43 Watch the clock. Make plans to do a all-nighter tonight.
Vow to watch only two TV programs.
16:58 Notice manager leave.
16:58:01 Sudden sense of freedom.
Go home for quick, short dinner break.
21:00 Come into the office
21:01 The hard working person you are, you have to come to the
office late at night to "get the work done."
21:03 Check electronic mail. Decide it would be a good time to
attack those ftp sites since network won't be loaded. Run
into "since network won't be loaded" traffic and get the
pictures into your machine. Compress all the unwanted
research and development directories to make space.
Backup all your pictures.
22:11 Admire pictures. Begin work; Realise you need references.
Realise its too late today to go to the pub. Sudden feeling
of having wasted the day.
22:49 Sudden feeling of possibly having to waste the night, decide
to turn in early and come back very early tom morrow
morning. Decide to play DOOM on the system to put yourself
in a good mood.
23:15 Play game after game after game to improve your score and
get on the scoreboard. Realise that your office mate is
still at number 6, two notches above you on the scoreboard.
00:20 Play until you beat your office mate into the 7th place.
A sense of achievement!! Yes, today was not wasted!! Return
home to find your roommate/partner watching David Letterman
reruns on NBC cable channel. Tell him/her about the "hard
working day you had." Discuss philosophy with roommate /
partner.
01:09 Think about becoming a philosopher and dining with 4 others.
(The Dining Philosophers problem, hee hee :-) (Comp Sci joke).
Argue with him/her about politics, why people prefer Japanese
cars and whether it is better to set the heat to "hot" or
"cold" to defrost the windscreen faster.
01:49 Realise neither of you have bought milk today.
Get reminded of the "too much milk problem."
02:04 Forget about getting up early. Turn the phone ringer off and
go to sleep.
Adrian
WWW WWW Adrian Gothard
WWW ww WWW White Horse Design
WWWWWWWWWW
WWWW WWWW w...@zetnet.co.uk, http://www.users.zetnet.co.uk/whd
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Designers of video capture/filter/processing systems for aircraft