In Another Territory
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yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:50:43 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
WARNING : This story contains implied guro.
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:52:35 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Prologue
As the sun slowly seeped into the sleeping area, the loud noise of
thumps and cracks did nothing to arouse the drowsy sleeper. Instead it
was a much closer concern that eventually woke the sleeper, hunger.
Slowly crawling out its sleeping area and remaining in the shadows,
the hungry creature looked around. Just as yesterday, the streets were
all but empty and abandoned. At least at first glance. Upon closer
inspection, the hungry creature watched as shadows shifted slightly
here and there. But that was its concern, its concern was obtaining
food.
The garbage in the immediate area had already been picked over
completely and utterly by the smaller, weaker beings of the area and
so the hungry creature had no choice but to forage further away from
its sleeping area.
Slinking through crevices.
Crawling through ducts.
Zipping between cover.
The hungry creature had no concept of time, only hunger. The longer
her search took, the greater its hunger grew. But wherever it looked,
there was no food. None that hadn't already been picked over at
least.
No food scraps.
No grass.
No weeds.
Just dirt and waste everywhere it looked.
A smell.
It didn't know what it smelled exactly but it recognized the smell as
food.
Making its way over to the source, it came across an opening and
contained within that opening was the source of the smell. Quickly
taking a look around for possible dangers, it dived into the room and
began eating.
“Shitty trash!”
The only thing the hungry creature understood that where there was
once hunger, there was now pain. It struggled against its assailant
but lacked the energy to do so.
“Die!”
Laying on its back, its body wracked with agonizing pain, it stared up
into a black hole.
And then the pain was gone.
As the sun slowly seeped into the sleeping area, the loud noise of
thumps and cracks did nothing to arouse the drowsy sleeper. Instead it
was a much closer concern that eventually woke the sleeper, hunger.
Slowly crawling out its sleeping area and remaining in the shadows,
the hungry creature looked around. Just as yesterday, the streets were
all but empty and abandoned. At least at first glance. Upon closer
inspection, the hungry creature watched as shadows shifted slightly
here and there. But that was its concern, its concern was obtaining
food.
The garbage in the immediate area had already been picked over
completely and utterly by the smaller, weaker beings of the area and
so the hungry creature had no choice but to forage further away from
its sleeping area.
Slinking through crevices.
Crawling through ducts.
Zipping between cover.
The hungry creature had no concept of time, only hunger. The longer
her search took, the greater its hunger grew. But wherever it looked,
there was no food. None that hadn't already been picked over at
least.
No food scraps.
No grass.
No weeds.
Just dirt and waste everywhere it looked.
A smell.
It didn't know what it smelled exactly but it recognized the smell as
food.
Making its way over to the source, it came across an opening and
contained within that opening was the source of the smell. Quickly
taking a look around for possible dangers, it dived into the room and
began eating.
“Shitty trash!”
The only thing the hungry creature understood that where there was
once hunger, there was now pain. It struggled against its assailant
but lacked the energy to do so.
“Die!”
Laying on its back, its body wracked with agonizing pain, it stared up
into a black hole.
And then the pain was gone.
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:53:03 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
The Clan
"Did you hear? Some of the yukkuris have started to pick up weapons
and are going around killing humans!"
"Shut up Asad, I'm not a rookie."
"No, I'm serious. Roble told me that a friend of his saw an entire
clan of yukkuris came out of a Christian outpost. When his friend went
to check it out, he found the partial eaten corpses of the guards.
Roble went to tell the boss."
"Fuck you, I'm going to sleep. How the hell do you last this long
without being able to tell a good story? Allah must love your womanly
ass."
"Agh! You're gonna get me killed one of these days if you don't learn
to listen."
"Yeah yeah now sh-"
"SHH!"
"What is it now you old fart?"
"Did you hear that?"
"No, now go to bed. There was a truce declared this morning, no one is
going to break it that qui-"
"Did you hear? Some of the yukkuris have started to pick up weapons
and are going around killing humans!"
"Shut up Asad, I'm not a rookie."
"No, I'm serious. Roble told me that a friend of his saw an entire
clan of yukkuris came out of a Christian outpost. When his friend went
to check it out, he found the partial eaten corpses of the guards.
Roble went to tell the boss."
"Fuck you, I'm going to sleep. How the hell do you last this long
without being able to tell a good story? Allah must love your womanly
ass."
"Agh! You're gonna get me killed one of these days if you don't learn
to listen."
"Yeah yeah now sh-"
"SHH!"
"What is it now you old fart?"
"Did you hear that?"
"No, now go to bed. There was a truce declared this morning, no one is
going to break it that qui-"
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:53:15 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Cause And Effect, Part 1
Boss Reimu surveyed the spoils of her clan's victory and smiled.
Ever since yukkuris in the area discovered the human's weakness to
sharp things, a number of local clans had adopted the methods of
defeating the shitty humans. Boss Reimu was one of those clans.
Today, Boss Reimu's clan had pulled off an outstanding victory. Slowly
sneaking into a human home, her clan quickly stomped and stabbed the
humans to death before they could reach their loud weapons. There was
not much human food to eat in the house, but Boss Reimu had been
taught by Smart Patchouli. Smart Patchouli had once see a human eat
another yukkuri and proclaim “Happiness!” upon ingesting it. If
yukkuris tasted good to humans, then humans must taste good to
yukkuris, Smart Patchouli told Boss Reimu.
And so her clan indulged in a feast.
Boss Reimu surveyed the spoils of her clan's victory and smiled.
Ever since yukkuris in the area discovered the human's weakness to
sharp things, a number of local clans had adopted the methods of
defeating the shitty humans. Boss Reimu was one of those clans.
Today, Boss Reimu's clan had pulled off an outstanding victory. Slowly
sneaking into a human home, her clan quickly stomped and stabbed the
humans to death before they could reach their loud weapons. There was
not much human food to eat in the house, but Boss Reimu had been
taught by Smart Patchouli. Smart Patchouli had once see a human eat
another yukkuri and proclaim “Happiness!” upon ingesting it. If
yukkuris tasted good to humans, then humans must taste good to
yukkuris, Smart Patchouli told Boss Reimu.
And so her clan indulged in a feast.
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:53:32 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
The Failure
Marisa's father was a great hunter and all of her offspring had been
Marisa type yukkuris. Marisa's father proudly displayed her scars and
incorrectly healed bruises as proof of her successful hunting career.
As such, her offspring was always taught that they would grow up to be
great hunters as well.
That was what Marisa had always been taught.
And that is what Marisa had always thought.
One day Marisa's father failed to return home from hunting. A nearby
yukkuri family later informed Marisa that Marisa's father had died at
the hands of humans.
Surely the humans must have cheated to kill her great hunter father,
thought Marisa.
And so, that night, Marisa set out to avenge her father. But no less
than a few minutes after leaving the safety of her home, Marisa died.
How?
Does it matter?
Her siblings? They too died at the hands of cheating humans. After
all, their father was a great hunter. And they were great hunters as
well.
Weren't they?
Marisa's father was a great hunter and all of her offspring had been
Marisa type yukkuris. Marisa's father proudly displayed her scars and
incorrectly healed bruises as proof of her successful hunting career.
As such, her offspring was always taught that they would grow up to be
great hunters as well.
That was what Marisa had always been taught.
And that is what Marisa had always thought.
One day Marisa's father failed to return home from hunting. A nearby
yukkuri family later informed Marisa that Marisa's father had died at
the hands of humans.
Surely the humans must have cheated to kill her great hunter father,
thought Marisa.
And so, that night, Marisa set out to avenge her father. But no less
than a few minutes after leaving the safety of her home, Marisa died.
How?
Does it matter?
Her siblings? They too died at the hands of cheating humans. After
all, their father was a great hunter. And they were great hunters as
well.
Weren't they?
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:53:46 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Cause and Effect, Part 2
Boss Reimu woke up after a peaceful sleep. Her belly still satisfied
thanks to last night's meal, she roused her clan from their stupor and
prepared them to move again. Only a few adults and the recently born
would remain behind and sustain themselves with the leftovers from
last night's hunt.
There were so many human homes but so many of them lacked the proper
food, facilities and human slaves necessary to satisfy Boss Reimu and
her clan. If only the shitty humans would give her an easy place, she
and her clan could take it easy forever.
Boss Reimu woke up after a peaceful sleep. Her belly still satisfied
thanks to last night's meal, she roused her clan from their stupor and
prepared them to move again. Only a few adults and the recently born
would remain behind and sustain themselves with the leftovers from
last night's hunt.
There were so many human homes but so many of them lacked the proper
food, facilities and human slaves necessary to satisfy Boss Reimu and
her clan. If only the shitty humans would give her an easy place, she
and her clan could take it easy forever.
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:54:03 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
The Dead
Reisen laid silently in the corner staring towards the middle of the
pit as did the rest of the battered and broken yukkuris lining the
walls.
Was she born there? She didn't know.
Did she have any memories of being outside the pit? She didn't
remember.
All Reisen knew was that she was hungry. And there were only two ways
to satisfy that hunger.
Eat.
Or be eaten.
Every now and then a new yukkuri would be dropped into the pit. That
new yukkuri would have to fend off attacks from those bold enough to
attack. Or be eaten.
The new yukkuris who successfully fended off the attacks would provide
the survivors with a bountiful meal.
The new yukkuris who did not successfully fend off the attacks would
provide a more modest meal.
Today though, there were no new yukkuris. But no one turned their
eyes. Today's meal would provide itself.
Today, it was a Marisa. Reisen didn't know her. Reisen didn't care.
Reisen only knew she was hungry and the Marisa was hungry as well.
Only the Marisa was hungrier. Hungry enough to do anything to end the
hunger.
And so, Reisen and the others obliged.
Reisen laid silently in the corner staring towards the middle of the
pit as did the rest of the battered and broken yukkuris lining the
walls.
Was she born there? She didn't know.
Did she have any memories of being outside the pit? She didn't
remember.
All Reisen knew was that she was hungry. And there were only two ways
to satisfy that hunger.
Eat.
Or be eaten.
Every now and then a new yukkuri would be dropped into the pit. That
new yukkuri would have to fend off attacks from those bold enough to
attack. Or be eaten.
The new yukkuris who successfully fended off the attacks would provide
the survivors with a bountiful meal.
The new yukkuris who did not successfully fend off the attacks would
provide a more modest meal.
Today though, there were no new yukkuris. But no one turned their
eyes. Today's meal would provide itself.
Today, it was a Marisa. Reisen didn't know her. Reisen didn't care.
Reisen only knew she was hungry and the Marisa was hungry as well.
Only the Marisa was hungrier. Hungry enough to do anything to end the
hunger.
And so, Reisen and the others obliged.
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:54:15 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Cause and Effect, Part 3
Boss Reimu's clan quickly crawled through the dirty alleyways,
stomping adult yukkuris to death not affiliated to a clan and eating
the children. Although such behavior always brought the risk of
drawing attention, she let them have their way.
When they fight humans, they'll need some memories of a successful
fight to encourage them.
Boss Reimu's clan quickly crawled through the dirty alleyways,
stomping adult yukkuris to death not affiliated to a clan and eating
the children. Although such behavior always brought the risk of
drawing attention, she let them have their way.
When they fight humans, they'll need some memories of a successful
fight to encourage them.
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:54:28 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
The Cry
The baby Alice yukkuri cried as loudly as it could.
Its siblings had died in their nest when its parents left them behind.
But the baby Alice didn't know that. All she knew was that she was
hungry.
Its father had died trying to slow their pursuers.
But the baby Alice didn't know that. All she knew was that she was
cold.
Its mother had died using her own body to seal the entrance to the
hole where the baby Alice laid hidden.
But the baby Alice didn't know that. All she knew was that she was
lonely.
And so the baby Alice cried as loudly as it could.
And the voice was heard.
Hearing the voice of the crying, a human came and removed the mother's
corpse from the entrance. Noticing at the human, the baby Alice spoke.
"Take it easy!"
To which the human replied.
"Die you shitty noise maker."
And crushed the baby Alice.
The baby Alice yukkuri cried as loudly as it could.
Its siblings had died in their nest when its parents left them behind.
But the baby Alice didn't know that. All she knew was that she was
hungry.
Its father had died trying to slow their pursuers.
But the baby Alice didn't know that. All she knew was that she was
cold.
Its mother had died using her own body to seal the entrance to the
hole where the baby Alice laid hidden.
But the baby Alice didn't know that. All she knew was that she was
lonely.
And so the baby Alice cried as loudly as it could.
And the voice was heard.
Hearing the voice of the crying, a human came and removed the mother's
corpse from the entrance. Noticing at the human, the baby Alice spoke.
"Take it easy!"
To which the human replied.
"Die you shitty noise maker."
And crushed the baby Alice.
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:54:42 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Cause and Effect, Part 4
Boss Reimu led her clan through a series of hidden tunnels which only
she and the oldest Patchoulis were smart enough to memorize. Her goal
was the easy place of the big boss of the area, a Koakuma.
Boss Reimu didn't like Koakuma, she was very uneasy. She said uneasy
things, acted uneasy and moved in an uneasy way. But she held her clan
back from fighting Koakuma's clan. Koakuma's clan was easily the
largest, strongest and smartest of them all. So, as infuruating as it
was for Boss Reimu to deal with Koakuma, she dealt with it.
Shaking herself from her thoughts, Boss Reimu noticed a sleeping
Yamame whose sleeping spot had become exposed by sunlight while it
slept. Boss Reimu quickly smashed the Yamame against the wall and
proceeded to grind it into the ground while her clan cheered her on.
Indeed, she dealt with her frustrations against Koakuma.
Boss Reimu led her clan through a series of hidden tunnels which only
she and the oldest Patchoulis were smart enough to memorize. Her goal
was the easy place of the big boss of the area, a Koakuma.
Boss Reimu didn't like Koakuma, she was very uneasy. She said uneasy
things, acted uneasy and moved in an uneasy way. But she held her clan
back from fighting Koakuma's clan. Koakuma's clan was easily the
largest, strongest and smartest of them all. So, as infuruating as it
was for Boss Reimu to deal with Koakuma, she dealt with it.
Shaking herself from her thoughts, Boss Reimu noticed a sleeping
Yamame whose sleeping spot had become exposed by sunlight while it
slept. Boss Reimu quickly smashed the Yamame against the wall and
proceeded to grind it into the ground while her clan cheered her on.
Indeed, she dealt with her frustrations against Koakuma.
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:55:12 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
*****
The Prisoner
Flandre was confused and scared.
While she had been hunting one day, she suddenly heard a loud noise
and then one of her wings was gone. Crashing to the ground, humans
quickly ensnared her and mercilessly cut off her other wing.
Understanding that the loss of both wings meant certain death under
any circumstances meant death for any flying creature, Flandre
silently weeped and waiting for the finishing blow.
Which never came.
Instead, she was stuffed into a bag and when she unceremoniously
dumped out, she found herself in a dark, dank room with no food, water
or windows. Turning around at her captors, she simply watched as a
large door slammed shut engulfing her in complete darkness. A few
minutes of pushing against the door and exploring the room revealed
that she was completely trapped. Her eyes slowly adjusted to the
darkness and she looked around the room.
She was captured by humans and then thrown into a dark room before she
knew what was happening. The only thing within the room was the corpse
of a long dead, rotten away unidentifiable yukkuri. Otherwise the room
was completely empty. No food, no water, no windows, not even a hole
for her to crawl into and die.
Crawling into a corner, Flandre silently wept herself to sleep.
Flandre wasn't sure how much time had passed until she was awoken by
the sound of the door being opened. Hearing something hit the floor
with a wet flop, Flandre quickly turned towards the door just as it
slammed shut.
Unsure of what her captors intended, she turned her attention to the
new object thrown into the room. It was wet, tough and red. Taking a
bite out of the strange thing, Flandre immediately vomited in
revulsion.
It was terrible.
It was horrid.
It was... anti-easy.
Flandre had no idea what the strange thing was, but whatever it once
was, it was something Flandre instinctively knew she should never eat.
And so, Flandre curled up into the corner farthest from the strange
thing and stared cautiously until she fell asleep from fatigue.
The door opened again and a new object was thrown into the room. This
one was also wet, tough and red. This time Flandre didn't even move to
try tasting it. She just closed her eyes and slept.
The door opened again and a new object was thrown into the room. This
time Flandre didn't even open her eyes to look at it.
The door opened again and a new object was thrown into the room. This
time Flandre wasn't even alive.
***
The door opened again and a new object was thrown into the room. A
beaten and battered Marisa yukkuri. Turning around at her captors, she
simply watched as a large door slammed shut engulfing her in complete
darkness. A few minutes of pushing against the door and exploring the
room revealed that she was completely trapped. Her eyes quickly
adjusted to the darkness thanks to her status as a predator and she
looked around the room.
The only thing within the room was the corpse of a dead,
unidentifiable yukkuri. Otherwise the room was completely empty. No
food, no water, no windows, not even a hole for her to crawl into and
die.
*****
The Prisoner
Flandre was confused and scared.
While she had been hunting one day, she suddenly heard a loud noise
and then one of her wings was gone. Crashing to the ground, humans
quickly ensnared her and mercilessly cut off her other wing.
Understanding that the loss of both wings meant certain death under
any circumstances meant death for any flying creature, Flandre
silently weeped and waiting for the finishing blow.
Which never came.
Instead, she was stuffed into a bag and when she unceremoniously
dumped out, she found herself in a dark, dank room with no food, water
or windows. Turning around at her captors, she simply watched as a
large door slammed shut engulfing her in complete darkness. A few
minutes of pushing against the door and exploring the room revealed
that she was completely trapped. Her eyes slowly adjusted to the
darkness and she looked around the room.
She was captured by humans and then thrown into a dark room before she
knew what was happening. The only thing within the room was the corpse
of a long dead, rotten away unidentifiable yukkuri. Otherwise the room
was completely empty. No food, no water, no windows, not even a hole
for her to crawl into and die.
Crawling into a corner, Flandre silently wept herself to sleep.
Flandre wasn't sure how much time had passed until she was awoken by
the sound of the door being opened. Hearing something hit the floor
with a wet flop, Flandre quickly turned towards the door just as it
slammed shut.
Unsure of what her captors intended, she turned her attention to the
new object thrown into the room. It was wet, tough and red. Taking a
bite out of the strange thing, Flandre immediately vomited in
revulsion.
It was terrible.
It was horrid.
It was... anti-easy.
Flandre had no idea what the strange thing was, but whatever it once
was, it was something Flandre instinctively knew she should never eat.
And so, Flandre curled up into the corner farthest from the strange
thing and stared cautiously until she fell asleep from fatigue.
The door opened again and a new object was thrown into the room. This
one was also wet, tough and red. This time Flandre didn't even move to
try tasting it. She just closed her eyes and slept.
The door opened again and a new object was thrown into the room. This
time Flandre didn't even open her eyes to look at it.
The door opened again and a new object was thrown into the room. This
time Flandre wasn't even alive.
***
The door opened again and a new object was thrown into the room. A
beaten and battered Marisa yukkuri. Turning around at her captors, she
simply watched as a large door slammed shut engulfing her in complete
darkness. A few minutes of pushing against the door and exploring the
room revealed that she was completely trapped. Her eyes quickly
adjusted to the darkness thanks to her status as a predator and she
looked around the room.
The only thing within the room was the corpse of a dead,
unidentifiable yukkuri. Otherwise the room was completely empty. No
food, no water, no windows, not even a hole for her to crawl into and
die.
*****
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:55:24 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Cause and Effect, Part 5
The meeting with Koakuma went wonderfully for Boss Reimu. Koakuma
wasn't there. Instead Boss Reimu found only a Reimu with a message
from Koakuma to Boss Reimu.
Not that Boss Reimu listened.
Boss Reimu had crushed the Reimu before she even spoke.
This was now Boss Reimu's territory.
The meeting with Koakuma went wonderfully for Boss Reimu. Koakuma
wasn't there. Instead Boss Reimu found only a Reimu with a message
from Koakuma to Boss Reimu.
Not that Boss Reimu listened.
Boss Reimu had crushed the Reimu before she even spoke.
This was now Boss Reimu's territory.
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:55:39 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
The Animal
Momiji stared blankly at the ceiling. Her innards ooze out of her
slowly, but she didn't move. Moving would only make her bleed out
faster. Her only hope was that someone could find her before it was
too late.
Slowly moving her eyes around the room, she saw the remains of her
pack.
Fellow packmates with holes in them.
Fellow packmates beaten to death.
Fellow packmates whose fates were explained only by a smeared trail of
innards across the ground.
Closing her eyes, Momiji resisted the urge to howl in sorrow. She had
no right to do that if she died here.
Hearing footsteps enter the room, Momiji turned her eyes to the source
of the noise.
A wolf.
Slowly, the wolf walked up to Momiji and stared her in the eye.
Momiji's lips moved.
"..."
And then Momiji was with her pack again.
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:55:51 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Cause and Effect, Part 6
Boss Reimu was outraged. The nests in Koakuma's territory were
completely empty. No food, no bedding, no treasure. Boss Reimu's
clanmates were also outraged, they had rushed around Koakuma's former
territory smashing barriers only to learn that their efforts were for
nothing.
Gathering her clan together, Boss Reimu fumed. Koakuma had cheated and
wouldn't let Boss Reimu take it easy here.
Whomever Boss Reimu and her clan met next would feel the fury of her
clan.
Boss Reimu was outraged. The nests in Koakuma's territory were
completely empty. No food, no bedding, no treasure. Boss Reimu's
clanmates were also outraged, they had rushed around Koakuma's former
territory smashing barriers only to learn that their efforts were for
nothing.
Gathering her clan together, Boss Reimu fumed. Koakuma had cheated and
wouldn't let Boss Reimu take it easy here.
Whomever Boss Reimu and her clan met next would feel the fury of her
clan.
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:56:37 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
The Helper
Youmu finished sawing through the wooden plank and looked up at her
human master in hopes of receiving praise.
Instead she received a slap and was told to work faster next time.
Youmu grit her teeth but silently accepted the admonishment and moved
onto her next task.
As terrible as the working conditions were and the treatment she
received, Youmu was more than happy to keep working. She got three
meals a day and a safe place to sleep. Mostly safe at least.
Before being taken in, Youmu had lived day-to-day seeking scraps of
food and having to wake up in the middle of the night to fend off
cannibals. A slap and admonishment was a small price to pay to avoid
going back to that life for Youmu.
As Youmu sawed through another wooden plank, she noticed her human was
being at yelled at by another human. She didn't understand what was
being said, it was beyond her understanding. All she knew was that it
looked like her human had lost whatever argument had taken place
because when he walked over to Youmu, his head was hanging down.
Suddenly picking Youmu up from her work, her human carried Youmu out
and boarded a bus. Unsure and scared of what was about to happen,
Youmu simply stared forward for hours. When her human finally
disembarked from the bus, her human simply walked towards a forest in
the distance.
When they arrived, her human put Youmu down on the ground and left
crying.
Youmu didn't understand. All Youmu knew was that its master left Youmu
in the forest crying and that was enough for Youmu.
What Youmu did understand was that she was surrounded by wild yukkuris
that lived in the forest.
Youmu finished sawing through the wooden plank and looked up at her
human master in hopes of receiving praise.
Instead she received a slap and was told to work faster next time.
Youmu grit her teeth but silently accepted the admonishment and moved
onto her next task.
As terrible as the working conditions were and the treatment she
received, Youmu was more than happy to keep working. She got three
meals a day and a safe place to sleep. Mostly safe at least.
Before being taken in, Youmu had lived day-to-day seeking scraps of
food and having to wake up in the middle of the night to fend off
cannibals. A slap and admonishment was a small price to pay to avoid
going back to that life for Youmu.
As Youmu sawed through another wooden plank, she noticed her human was
being at yelled at by another human. She didn't understand what was
being said, it was beyond her understanding. All she knew was that it
looked like her human had lost whatever argument had taken place
because when he walked over to Youmu, his head was hanging down.
Suddenly picking Youmu up from her work, her human carried Youmu out
and boarded a bus. Unsure and scared of what was about to happen,
Youmu simply stared forward for hours. When her human finally
disembarked from the bus, her human simply walked towards a forest in
the distance.
When they arrived, her human put Youmu down on the ground and left
crying.
Youmu didn't understand. All Youmu knew was that its master left Youmu
in the forest crying and that was enough for Youmu.
What Youmu did understand was that she was surrounded by wild yukkuris
that lived in the forest.
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:56:50 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Cause and Effect, Part 7
Disasterous.
Boss Reimu and her clan had tried to sneak into a human home and hide
in the shadows before launching their attack but they had been spotted
a trio of humans coming out of a side room. Although the humans
weren't armed, they were more than capable of tearing and crushing a
good portion of her clan. Worse still, one of the humans had managed
to escape alive.
As Boss Reimu's clan quickly gorged themselves on what they could,
Boss Reimu prepared to lead her clan away from this human home and
seek properly concealed shelter.
Disasterous.
Boss Reimu and her clan had tried to sneak into a human home and hide
in the shadows before launching their attack but they had been spotted
a trio of humans coming out of a side room. Although the humans
weren't armed, they were more than capable of tearing and crushing a
good portion of her clan. Worse still, one of the humans had managed
to escape alive.
As Boss Reimu's clan quickly gorged themselves on what they could,
Boss Reimu prepared to lead her clan away from this human home and
seek properly concealed shelter.
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:57:29 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
The Arbiter
Satori fidgeted nervously next to Koakuma as the three groups of
humans pointed fingers at one another and tried to shout down the
other two.
Koakuma had ordered Satori to sit in with the humans and ordered her
to do only one thing. To shout out loud if one of the humans stated a
lie and then point out that lie.
Satori had no idea why Koakuma wanted her to do this or how she even
knew about this meeting, but Koakuma was her boss and so she obeyed
without reading her mind.
Between having to listen to all the shouting and reading the minds of
so many humans all at once, Satori wasn't sure if her mind was keeping
up but she was able to grasp the general point of the discussion.
Humans were being attacked and killed by yukkuris and the humans were
trying to decide whether to unite against the yukkuris or let each
faction deal with the situation as they saw fit.
Being a yukkuri herself, Satori was obviously concerned about being a
room full of humans talking about eliminating all yukkuris in the
city. But she calmed herself with the knowledge that Koakuma had come
with the entire clan, tiny as it was, in order to protect Satori.
Suddenly the shouting stopped and the humans all left the room.
Confused and barely working herself out of her daze, Satori turned to
Koakuma for an explanation.
"Koa~ amazing! Even though yukkuris are invading their territory, they
still choose to kill one another at the same time! Koakuma is truly
thankful to Mister Companion!" Suddenly boomed Koakuma.
Satori could only tilt her head in confusion... and dizzyness from
having read the minds of so many humans.
Satori fidgeted nervously next to Koakuma as the three groups of
humans pointed fingers at one another and tried to shout down the
other two.
Koakuma had ordered Satori to sit in with the humans and ordered her
to do only one thing. To shout out loud if one of the humans stated a
lie and then point out that lie.
Satori had no idea why Koakuma wanted her to do this or how she even
knew about this meeting, but Koakuma was her boss and so she obeyed
without reading her mind.
Between having to listen to all the shouting and reading the minds of
so many humans all at once, Satori wasn't sure if her mind was keeping
up but she was able to grasp the general point of the discussion.
Humans were being attacked and killed by yukkuris and the humans were
trying to decide whether to unite against the yukkuris or let each
faction deal with the situation as they saw fit.
Being a yukkuri herself, Satori was obviously concerned about being a
room full of humans talking about eliminating all yukkuris in the
city. But she calmed herself with the knowledge that Koakuma had come
with the entire clan, tiny as it was, in order to protect Satori.
Suddenly the shouting stopped and the humans all left the room.
Confused and barely working herself out of her daze, Satori turned to
Koakuma for an explanation.
"Koa~ amazing! Even though yukkuris are invading their territory, they
still choose to kill one another at the same time! Koakuma is truly
thankful to Mister Companion!" Suddenly boomed Koakuma.
Satori could only tilt her head in confusion... and dizzyness from
having read the minds of so many humans.
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:57:41 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Cause and Effect. Part 8
Boss Reimu was unsatisified with today's hunt. She had lost a large
portion of her clan and gathering replacements would mean having to
backtrack through territory she had already conquered. She was also
unable to eat an easy meal and her tummy grumbled as a result.
Making herself comfortable in the bedding, Boss Reimu fell asleep to
the cries of anguish coming from baby Sanaes as they were slowly eaten
one by one by Boss Reimu's clan.
Boss Reimu was unsatisified with today's hunt. She had lost a large
portion of her clan and gathering replacements would mean having to
backtrack through territory she had already conquered. She was also
unable to eat an easy meal and her tummy grumbled as a result.
Making herself comfortable in the bedding, Boss Reimu fell asleep to
the cries of anguish coming from baby Sanaes as they were slowly eaten
one by one by Boss Reimu's clan.
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 8:57:56 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Epilogue
yukiyuzen
Jun 12, 2011, 9:07:41 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
I wrote this one pretty quickly, writing is pretty easy if you use
throwaway characters.
I didn't want to bog myself down in details so a lot of the action
takes place between chapters and I couldn't really figure out how to
describe cannibalism scenes in text well anyway :P
The chapter "The Prisoner" was actually the original basis of this
story. It was actually twice as long as it ended up being and was
still the largest chapter.
This is just a story I wanted to get off my chest. I'm not going to
write another one like it for a while, but all is not well in the
world.
As for the title, its a nod to Ernest Hemingway's "In Another Country".
throwaway characters.
I didn't want to bog myself down in details so a lot of the action
takes place between chapters and I couldn't really figure out how to
describe cannibalism scenes in text well anyway :P
The chapter "The Prisoner" was actually the original basis of this
story. It was actually twice as long as it ended up being and was
still the largest chapter.
This is just a story I wanted to get off my chest. I'm not going to
write another one like it for a while, but all is not well in the
world.
As for the title, its a nod to Ernest Hemingway's "In Another Country".
Toawa
Jun 12, 2011, 9:20:13 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Haven't read it yet, I just wanted to say, you might want to think about
next time sending it in one or two big emails, not 20 little ones...
next time sending it in one or two big emails, not 20 little ones...
MET
Jun 12, 2011, 11:20:39 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
I read it out of curiosity. . .but i'll be honest. . .outside of
yukkuris killing humans. . .i didn't understand anything. . .I don't
know if that was the point, if there was a story to follow or not.
could we get an explanation behind it or something?
yukkuris killing humans. . .i didn't understand anything. . .I don't
know if that was the point, if there was a story to follow or not.
could we get an explanation behind it or something?
Zzz...
Jun 12, 2011, 11:34:25 PM6/12/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Bravo Yukiyuzen! BRAVO!
Meaningless. Pointless. Senseless.
The best stories are the ones that the readers can color in the
emptiness themselves.
Especially love how you use the same (or is it really the same?)
vignette to frame all the pieces.
Meaningless. Pointless. Senseless.
The best stories are the ones that the readers can color in the
emptiness themselves.
Especially love how you use the same (or is it really the same?)
vignette to frame all the pieces.
Abe Gray
Jun 13, 2011, 12:06:26 AM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
I sincerely despise this story.
Not on the basis of the writing (which was decent) but on the notion
that yukkuris can go around and kill humans armed with 'sharp things'.
Unlike poweryoga's yukkuri of war story, this story simply goes too
far..
I refuse to consider it apart of yukkuri fandom, but don't take it
personally.
Not on the basis of the writing (which was decent) but on the notion
that yukkuris can go around and kill humans armed with 'sharp things'.
Unlike poweryoga's yukkuri of war story, this story simply goes too
far..
I refuse to consider it apart of yukkuri fandom, but don't take it
personally.
Message has been deleted
yukiyuzen
Jun 13, 2011, 6:55:17 AM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
@Toawa
Posting each chapter in its own post was by design. I wanted to give
readers an actual gap between chapters as well as an in-story time
gap.
@MET
Honestly, yukkuris killing humans wasn't the point. The point was, if
we view yukkuris as animals what kind of obvious baggage would they
get?
(In order)
(Prologue).Obviously they have to eat. No brainer here, dialogue-less
gutter trash story. Wakes up, seeks food, dies.
(Clan) If they eat, that means they want to survive and the best way
to survive is to organize in number. SIGNIFICANT numbers. But if they
have significant numbers, sooner or later humans and yukkuris would
end up fighting...
(Failure) If they have to organize in number to survive, what happens
if they DON'T organize in number?
(Dead) Even if they DO organize in number, they need FOOD. They say an
army marches on its stomach and all that.
(Cry) Even if they do everything right, sometimes things goes wrong.
Ditch the slowest kids, slow the pursuers and barricade the kid inside
away from the enemy. Perfect strategy, right? Until Anon that is.
(Prisoner) Admittedly, this one is completely and utterly unfinished.
The story was about an experiment to see if the stories about yukkuris
eating humans was true. I was going to write about Flandre eating the
"strange thing" (which is now obviously human flesh, cut off BY OTHER
HUMANS) but then she slowly accepts that she shouldn't be doing so and
then dies of starvation at which point Marisa is thrown in and the
experiment repeats. So it was supposed to be a "will yukkuris
completely turn against humans or not?" (Flandre, being a predator,
was an obvious ideal character for this.)
(Animal) Do yukkuris cannibalize their wounded/dying/dead? Do they
nurse them back to health? Or do simply abandon them? I wasn't sure
what path I wanted to take yet, so I left the ending ambiguous by
having another, actual animal show up instead.
(Helper) Yukkuris, man's best friend? Hey if dogs can do it, why can't
yukkuris seeing as they're capable of human speech?
(Arbiter) Dogs are used to sniff out bombs, why not have Satori sniff
out lies?
(Epilogue) Another completely and utterly unfinished chapter. By now
its established that the story takes place in a war/conflict zone. So
what happens to the HUMAN GUTTER TRASH? Maybe they're caught trying to
steal food from Boss Reimu's food storage. Well...
@Zzz...
It is meaningless, pointless and senseless. Say, isn't that what war
is?
@Abe Gray
I'm not trying to insult you but, do you honestly believe that the
average, unarmed, unarmored human being can go up against 50+
basketball sized creatures armed with razor blades in a locked room
and always come out victorious?
Posting each chapter in its own post was by design. I wanted to give
readers an actual gap between chapters as well as an in-story time
gap.
@MET
Honestly, yukkuris killing humans wasn't the point. The point was, if
we view yukkuris as animals what kind of obvious baggage would they
get?
(In order)
(Prologue).Obviously they have to eat. No brainer here, dialogue-less
gutter trash story. Wakes up, seeks food, dies.
(Clan) If they eat, that means they want to survive and the best way
to survive is to organize in number. SIGNIFICANT numbers. But if they
have significant numbers, sooner or later humans and yukkuris would
end up fighting...
(Failure) If they have to organize in number to survive, what happens
if they DON'T organize in number?
(Dead) Even if they DO organize in number, they need FOOD. They say an
army marches on its stomach and all that.
(Cry) Even if they do everything right, sometimes things goes wrong.
Ditch the slowest kids, slow the pursuers and barricade the kid inside
away from the enemy. Perfect strategy, right? Until Anon that is.
(Prisoner) Admittedly, this one is completely and utterly unfinished.
The story was about an experiment to see if the stories about yukkuris
eating humans was true. I was going to write about Flandre eating the
"strange thing" (which is now obviously human flesh, cut off BY OTHER
HUMANS) but then she slowly accepts that she shouldn't be doing so and
then dies of starvation at which point Marisa is thrown in and the
experiment repeats. So it was supposed to be a "will yukkuris
completely turn against humans or not?" (Flandre, being a predator,
was an obvious ideal character for this.)
(Animal) Do yukkuris cannibalize their wounded/dying/dead? Do they
nurse them back to health? Or do simply abandon them? I wasn't sure
what path I wanted to take yet, so I left the ending ambiguous by
having another, actual animal show up instead.
(Helper) Yukkuris, man's best friend? Hey if dogs can do it, why can't
yukkuris seeing as they're capable of human speech?
(Arbiter) Dogs are used to sniff out bombs, why not have Satori sniff
out lies?
(Epilogue) Another completely and utterly unfinished chapter. By now
its established that the story takes place in a war/conflict zone. So
what happens to the HUMAN GUTTER TRASH? Maybe they're caught trying to
steal food from Boss Reimu's food storage. Well...
@Zzz...
It is meaningless, pointless and senseless. Say, isn't that what war
is?
@Abe Gray
I'm not trying to insult you but, do you honestly believe that the
average, unarmed, unarmored human being can go up against 50+
basketball sized creatures armed with razor blades in a locked room
and always come out victorious?
MET
Jun 13, 2011, 7:43:11 AM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Hmm, if that was the point of the story i believe it was kinda lost,
at least for me.
Now about Abe Gray's problem and your answer to it. While that may
happen, i believe you still gave the yukkuris too much credit, or some
sort of plot armor, since while 1 human may not be able to deal with
armed yukkuris, you plainly let them do whatever they want, even waltz
around alleys mass killing other yukkuris after killing humans,
warzone or not, a clan or armed agressive manjuus wouldn't left
unscathed, even if authorities wouldn't do anything, the locals would
arm themselves and deal with the threat, specially being yukkuris, in
such scenario Reimu's clan wouldn't had lasted this long.
Maybe a "Consequences" act with Armed angry Third World Villagers or
something, raiding Boss Reimu's easy place and killing her whole clan
would had made things more believeable, even more if it turns out that
Boss Reimu's clan isn't the first, neither the last clan of yukkuris
that had been able to succesfully raid human houses with knives and
such in the middle of the human's war, only for them to be hunted down
by locals, repeating the process again and again, all because of the
warzone's situation.
Having Boss Reimu's clan not facing communal consequences from angry
humans who would be even angrier because of war is, well, either plot
armor or giving too much credit to the yukkuris survival.
Still, all those points aside, i don't agree much with Abe Gray's
outburst, it's not like it's the first or last story on which yukkuris
are able to kill humans, no need to go about "NOT PART OF THE FANDOM"
it's not like it will change the real status quo of yukkuris getting
owned by everything in the world, yeah, that incluiding rocks and the
soil they bounce at. It's like Poweryoga's Yukkuri of War or Zeta
Kaguya's "Rebellion of an Uneasy Yukkuri", no need to cry "FOUL".
at least for me.
Now about Abe Gray's problem and your answer to it. While that may
happen, i believe you still gave the yukkuris too much credit, or some
sort of plot armor, since while 1 human may not be able to deal with
armed yukkuris, you plainly let them do whatever they want, even waltz
around alleys mass killing other yukkuris after killing humans,
warzone or not, a clan or armed agressive manjuus wouldn't left
unscathed, even if authorities wouldn't do anything, the locals would
arm themselves and deal with the threat, specially being yukkuris, in
such scenario Reimu's clan wouldn't had lasted this long.
Maybe a "Consequences" act with Armed angry Third World Villagers or
something, raiding Boss Reimu's easy place and killing her whole clan
would had made things more believeable, even more if it turns out that
Boss Reimu's clan isn't the first, neither the last clan of yukkuris
that had been able to succesfully raid human houses with knives and
such in the middle of the human's war, only for them to be hunted down
by locals, repeating the process again and again, all because of the
warzone's situation.
Having Boss Reimu's clan not facing communal consequences from angry
humans who would be even angrier because of war is, well, either plot
armor or giving too much credit to the yukkuris survival.
Still, all those points aside, i don't agree much with Abe Gray's
outburst, it's not like it's the first or last story on which yukkuris
are able to kill humans, no need to go about "NOT PART OF THE FANDOM"
it's not like it will change the real status quo of yukkuris getting
owned by everything in the world, yeah, that incluiding rocks and the
soil they bounce at. It's like Poweryoga's Yukkuri of War or Zeta
Kaguya's "Rebellion of an Uneasy Yukkuri", no need to cry "FOUL".
anon kun
Jun 13, 2011, 8:43:35 AM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
@Abe Gray
People like you shouldn't post.
There's a big WARNING right on the top of the story and Yukiyuzen
actually brought up the subject of the story in another thread.
Reading something that you already know that you won't like only to
complain right after it's stupid.
Especially since your criticism is 100% about your tastes (which is
not of help) and 0% constructive.
You basically show up here to say the equivalent of "lol it's shit"
without giving anything else.
I hope you won't take it personally.
@Yukiyuzen
Regarding the story, I'm torn between two sides.
From one side I think that this story has some flaws, but rather than
plot-wise it's more about the style: I know that you chose to
multipost because every mail talks about something different and so
it's even easier to divide the story in separate segments (only one
mail would have made the text too heavy, I think), but both this
choice and the use of throwaway characters are backfiring, in this
case.
Why? Because they break the focus: the average post lenght in this
story is about 150 words. This means that the reader has just the time
to understand what's happening, right to skip on something completely
different.
The titles as well break focus because they put emphasys on elements
that sometimes return and sometimes disappear right after.
On the other side I think that the prologue and the ending are really
valid.
""""I didn't want to bog myself down in details""""
Some authors find it boring to write them, but they are what makes a
story valid and understandable.
You mentioned Hemingway, so I'd like to know if the almost complete
lack of action in the story is a coincidence ^^
People like you shouldn't post.
There's a big WARNING right on the top of the story and Yukiyuzen
actually brought up the subject of the story in another thread.
Reading something that you already know that you won't like only to
complain right after it's stupid.
Especially since your criticism is 100% about your tastes (which is
not of help) and 0% constructive.
You basically show up here to say the equivalent of "lol it's shit"
without giving anything else.
I hope you won't take it personally.
@Yukiyuzen
Regarding the story, I'm torn between two sides.
From one side I think that this story has some flaws, but rather than
plot-wise it's more about the style: I know that you chose to
multipost because every mail talks about something different and so
it's even easier to divide the story in separate segments (only one
mail would have made the text too heavy, I think), but both this
choice and the use of throwaway characters are backfiring, in this
case.
Why? Because they break the focus: the average post lenght in this
story is about 150 words. This means that the reader has just the time
to understand what's happening, right to skip on something completely
different.
The titles as well break focus because they put emphasys on elements
that sometimes return and sometimes disappear right after.
On the other side I think that the prologue and the ending are really
valid.
""""I didn't want to bog myself down in details""""
story valid and understandable.
You mentioned Hemingway, so I'd like to know if the almost complete
lack of action in the story is a coincidence ^^
Atzumo Kayami
Jun 13, 2011, 10:05:15 AM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
I enjoy stories like this every once in a while. Zzz..., you stole my
comment.
comment.
Zzz...
Jun 13, 2011, 10:21:05 AM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
It's actually way more than that. It isn't just war that's pointless,
meaningless, and senseless.
It is almost EVERYTHING that humanity (and yukkuris as an reflection
of us) ever does.
Every measly conflict, be it national, economic, racial, ethnic,
domestic, intellectual, or just two hicks in the woods beating the tar
out of each other.
All of it comes down to "it's us or them, we're right and they're
wrong, so let's be douches since they deserve no better."
Case in point...this whole discussion sparked by Abe Gray.
There is no yukkuri canon and what is fanon anyway?
Nothing is official. Nothing is set in stone. Yukkuris are exactly how
EACH of us sees them.
Don't like what you see? Don't read more of it! But don't any of you
DARE say that it's wrong!
WRITE! SHOW YOU'RE OWN DAMN VISION! It'll be just as legitimate as the
next.
For illustrating this senselessness both within your story and outside
of it I applaud you Yukiyuzen!
I truly regret that you won't be writing more.
An I have to disagree with MET. I find the fact that Reimu escaped the
consequences all the more fitting for the wretchedness of this tale.
The world doesn't dole out consequences in equal measure. How many
REAL tyrants goes unpunished because they are politically useful for
the powers that be?
How many REAL atrocities goes unresolved and unmentioned because they
are too far from home and too much trouble?
The title is misleading yes. But only because the world and our very
systems of morality is the very same.
meaningless, and senseless.
It is almost EVERYTHING that humanity (and yukkuris as an reflection
of us) ever does.
Every measly conflict, be it national, economic, racial, ethnic,
domestic, intellectual, or just two hicks in the woods beating the tar
out of each other.
All of it comes down to "it's us or them, we're right and they're
wrong, so let's be douches since they deserve no better."
Case in point...this whole discussion sparked by Abe Gray.
There is no yukkuri canon and what is fanon anyway?
Nothing is official. Nothing is set in stone. Yukkuris are exactly how
EACH of us sees them.
Don't like what you see? Don't read more of it! But don't any of you
DARE say that it's wrong!
WRITE! SHOW YOU'RE OWN DAMN VISION! It'll be just as legitimate as the
next.
For illustrating this senselessness both within your story and outside
of it I applaud you Yukiyuzen!
I truly regret that you won't be writing more.
An I have to disagree with MET. I find the fact that Reimu escaped the
consequences all the more fitting for the wretchedness of this tale.
The world doesn't dole out consequences in equal measure. How many
REAL tyrants goes unpunished because they are politically useful for
the powers that be?
How many REAL atrocities goes unresolved and unmentioned because they
are too far from home and too much trouble?
The title is misleading yes. But only because the world and our very
systems of morality is the very same.
MET
Jun 13, 2011, 12:18:14 PM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
> The world doesn't dole out consequences in equal measure. How many
> REAL tyrants goes unpunished because they are politically useful for
> the powers that be?
>
> How many REAL atrocities goes unresolved and unmentioned because they
> are too far from home and too much trouble?
That's cute and all but, again, "yukkuris", that should be answer
> REAL tyrants goes unpunished because they are politically useful for
> the powers that be?
>
> How many REAL atrocities goes unresolved and unmentioned because they
> are too far from home and too much trouble?
enough to realize that it's quite off to not expect "retribution",
it's like if an invasion of rats happened and no one did anything, you
fly a way with the "deep meanings and such" while forgetting that
Yukkuris are barely considered animal so it's easier for them to face
retribution out of angry mob.
Yukiyuzen mentioned that part of the point of the story was showing
some extra animal aspects for yukkuris, at least that's what his
explanation made me understand, which included organizaiton, etc. So
the idea of a horde of agressive animals not being dealed with, is in
general, unbelieveable or at least it feels like something is missing,
like the hint that it's all a cycle, that yeah the Reimu clans killed
humans did random shit, but then angry humans came and killed her and
her clan, and then another boss yukkuri killed other humans and yet
other humans went after them, and repeat, repeat, repeat, an endless
cycle product of the present situation of this "country" they are at.
We have to remember this aren't ethnic groups, political parties,
proper regimes, etc. They are Yukkuris, Monster Fauna as much, many
times treated like pests or worse, which leads to the idea that it's
hard if not impossible for a group as big of yukkuris as Boss Reimu's
clan that is openly being agressive and even doing random shit on
alleys and stuff, to not be hunted down by a mob and erradicated, even
more during warzones were people are extra agressive and extra
defensive. I would dare to say that expecting Yukkuris to "get away"
with killing humans, war or not, is disregarding not only the average
human to yukkuri dynamics but also disregarding how people react to
that kind of dangers.
Abe Gray
Jun 13, 2011, 1:27:49 PM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
@ Yukiyuzen
Yukkuris are known to be weak-- even armed with razor blades it'd be
dubious if they knew how to use them. Not to mention most yukkuris
have not been shown to able to jump that high, so they'd probably only
be able to attack the knees. Ultimately I feel your story lacks a
suspension of disbelef you need to show how the yukkuris overwhelm the
human beings, plain and simple. Moreover the entire premise of a reimu
being intelligent enough to amass a supply of razor blades, along with
battle tactics subverts yukkuri fandom.
Finally, one unarmed, unarmored human? Doesn't this take place in a
warzone with such arms and armor? Moreover, there were three humans
and the yukkuris still managed to kill them.
I understand you aren't trying to insult me; I only appended that
warning on to qualify my hatred.
@Anon kun
> People like you shouldn't post.
People who have different opinions, who can qualify them, and accept
when they're wrong should always post.
> There's a big WARNING right on the top of the story
'Ero guro nansensu, characterized as a "prewar, bourgeois cultural
phenomenon that devoted itself to explorations of the deviant, the
bizarre, and the ridiculous,"[2] manifested in the popular culture of
Taishō Tokyo during the 1920s....'
Guro does not entail serial killings of humans (I expected at the most
the death of one human) and a subversion of the typical tropes of
yukkuri fandom.
> and Yukiyuzen actually brought up the subject of the story in another thread.
... I didn't read that thread, but I don't see how that can be
considering a 'warning'
>Reading something that you already know that you won't like only to complain right after it's stupid.
See above comment. I had no idea this story was what it was-- and it
was not just a complaint
>Especially since your criticism is 100% about your tastes (which is not of help) and 0% constructive.
not of help should be "not helpful." I believe.
Yes my critique is based on my tastes, but I believe the point it
brings up is valid. Further, there is nothing preventing us from
having a reasoned discussion (although you seem opposed to that)
especially since I consider my taste in this area (anti-yukkuri-
killing-humans) to be well shared. As for 0% constructive-- I
qualified my critique, as you will see below.
>You basically show up here to say the equivalent of "lol it's shit" without giving anything else.
'Not on the basis of the writing (which was decent)' I said what
bothered me and then I followed up with this post.
Notice; I did not oversimplify and I think 'Without giving any other
critique' is what you wanted to write.
>I hope you won't take it personally.
This is the weird thing. Previously you said 'People like you
shouldn't post.' which basically means that I have nothing good to
say. If I don't take that personally, should I just ignore your
demand?
I would like to assume you included that phrase in a bizarre attempt
to be snide, but I can't say. Instead, I have to ask myself; did I
make a stupid and uninformed opinion? I don't think so though it is up
to others to call me out on this.
Did you make a stupid and uninformed opinion?
Well... I can't really say.
Rather what I can do is point out what I believe are fallacies, and
let others judge for themselves.
Yukkuris are known to be weak-- even armed with razor blades it'd be
dubious if they knew how to use them. Not to mention most yukkuris
have not been shown to able to jump that high, so they'd probably only
be able to attack the knees. Ultimately I feel your story lacks a
suspension of disbelef you need to show how the yukkuris overwhelm the
human beings, plain and simple. Moreover the entire premise of a reimu
being intelligent enough to amass a supply of razor blades, along with
battle tactics subverts yukkuri fandom.
Finally, one unarmed, unarmored human? Doesn't this take place in a
warzone with such arms and armor? Moreover, there were three humans
and the yukkuris still managed to kill them.
I understand you aren't trying to insult me; I only appended that
warning on to qualify my hatred.
@Anon kun
> People like you shouldn't post.
when they're wrong should always post.
> There's a big WARNING right on the top of the story
phenomenon that devoted itself to explorations of the deviant, the
bizarre, and the ridiculous,"[2] manifested in the popular culture of
Taishō Tokyo during the 1920s....'
Guro does not entail serial killings of humans (I expected at the most
the death of one human) and a subversion of the typical tropes of
yukkuri fandom.
> and Yukiyuzen actually brought up the subject of the story in another thread.
considering a 'warning'
>Reading something that you already know that you won't like only to complain right after it's stupid.
was not just a complaint
>Especially since your criticism is 100% about your tastes (which is not of help) and 0% constructive.
Yes my critique is based on my tastes, but I believe the point it
brings up is valid. Further, there is nothing preventing us from
having a reasoned discussion (although you seem opposed to that)
especially since I consider my taste in this area (anti-yukkuri-
killing-humans) to be well shared. As for 0% constructive-- I
qualified my critique, as you will see below.
>You basically show up here to say the equivalent of "lol it's shit" without giving anything else.
bothered me and then I followed up with this post.
Notice; I did not oversimplify and I think 'Without giving any other
critique' is what you wanted to write.
>I hope you won't take it personally.
shouldn't post.' which basically means that I have nothing good to
say. If I don't take that personally, should I just ignore your
demand?
I would like to assume you included that phrase in a bizarre attempt
to be snide, but I can't say. Instead, I have to ask myself; did I
make a stupid and uninformed opinion? I don't think so though it is up
to others to call me out on this.
Did you make a stupid and uninformed opinion?
Well... I can't really say.
Rather what I can do is point out what I believe are fallacies, and
let others judge for themselves.
Abe Gray
Jun 13, 2011, 1:29:51 PM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
>
> There is no yukkuri canon and what is fanon anyway?
>
> Nothing is official. Nothing is set in stone. Yukkuris are exactly how
> EACH of us sees them.
>
fine, but I personally believe that the majority of the japanese
community dictate orthodox yukkuri belief, that is the fandom itself.
Zzz...
Jun 13, 2011, 3:04:06 PM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Okay MET.
You choose not to see any deeper meaning in a piece of work. I choose
to see it.
That's a valid difference between us and does not bear arguing. If I
gave the impression that I am, then I'm sorry.
My phrasing is "I disagree with YOU."
Does that mean I INVALIDATE your reasoning or that MY reasoning is the
only TRUTH?
No. It simply means where you can't form an understanding, I can.
Do I hold a monopoly on truth? No. I'm only one person out of the
billions of the world's population and out of however large the
yukkuri fandom is.
My reality is only one interpretation out of many. I am not the
representative of what is real.
But MET...and Abe Gray...neither are you.
Disagree with me or something else all you want! That's what's so
great about a subjective viewpoint.
But don't reject something out of hand.
Abe, you say that orthodoxy forms the hard and fast rules of yukkuri.
Fine...I can see from your perspective.
But orthodoxy changes over time. Women used to not have work,
property, and voting rights as the orthodoxy. Slavery isn't considered
wrong as the orthodoxy. The world is flat was the orthodoxy.
Those views changed and we are now where we are now.
The orthodoxy of yukkuri also have changed. Think back to the
beginning of the yukkuri phenomenon. Is it the same as it is now?
Or more recently...was the world of yukkuri before Dosu in the city
and Raising Platinum Yukkuris the same as it is now?
You may disagree with what was portrayed. I'm sure there were those
who disliked DitC and RPY. But those ideas stuck anyway...
Don't reject...it's irresponsible. Just saying...
Nothing is official. Nothing is set in stone. Orthodoxy EVOLVES.
Being attached too strongly the orthodox NOW mean you alienate those
on the outside. Those who might provide more novel and entertaining
ideas in the future.
You choose not to see any deeper meaning in a piece of work. I choose
to see it.
That's a valid difference between us and does not bear arguing. If I
gave the impression that I am, then I'm sorry.
My phrasing is "I disagree with YOU."
Does that mean I INVALIDATE your reasoning or that MY reasoning is the
only TRUTH?
No. It simply means where you can't form an understanding, I can.
Do I hold a monopoly on truth? No. I'm only one person out of the
billions of the world's population and out of however large the
yukkuri fandom is.
My reality is only one interpretation out of many. I am not the
representative of what is real.
But MET...and Abe Gray...neither are you.
Disagree with me or something else all you want! That's what's so
great about a subjective viewpoint.
But don't reject something out of hand.
Abe, you say that orthodoxy forms the hard and fast rules of yukkuri.
Fine...I can see from your perspective.
But orthodoxy changes over time. Women used to not have work,
property, and voting rights as the orthodoxy. Slavery isn't considered
wrong as the orthodoxy. The world is flat was the orthodoxy.
Those views changed and we are now where we are now.
The orthodoxy of yukkuri also have changed. Think back to the
beginning of the yukkuri phenomenon. Is it the same as it is now?
Or more recently...was the world of yukkuri before Dosu in the city
and Raising Platinum Yukkuris the same as it is now?
You may disagree with what was portrayed. I'm sure there were those
who disliked DitC and RPY. But those ideas stuck anyway...
Don't reject...it's irresponsible. Just saying...
Nothing is official. Nothing is set in stone. Orthodoxy EVOLVES.
Being attached too strongly the orthodox NOW mean you alienate those
on the outside. Those who might provide more novel and entertaining
ideas in the future.
anon kun
Jun 13, 2011, 3:45:57 PM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
@Abe Gray
If you want to break my post in single words, analyze them one by one
and playing semantics it's cool... but it's enough to consider the
point of my post instead, which is: the story wasn't intended for your
tastes, the author had already stated it repeatedly and you still come
here to complain.
It's not my fault if you didn't knew about any previous thread: common
sense would like a new user to read a little around before posting,
instead of creating an account just to tell someone that he despise
his story.
A new guy shows up and the first thing that he says on the site is "I
sincerely despise this story".
He doesn't go to comment the stories that he likes, he doesn't greet
anyone, he doesn't make any contribution.
No, the first thing he does is criticizing.
That's you, I hope you can see my point.
If you want to break my post in single words, analyze them one by one
and playing semantics it's cool... but it's enough to consider the
point of my post instead, which is: the story wasn't intended for your
tastes, the author had already stated it repeatedly and you still come
here to complain.
It's not my fault if you didn't knew about any previous thread: common
sense would like a new user to read a little around before posting,
instead of creating an account just to tell someone that he despise
his story.
A new guy shows up and the first thing that he says on the site is "I
sincerely despise this story".
He doesn't go to comment the stories that he likes, he doesn't greet
anyone, he doesn't make any contribution.
No, the first thing he does is criticizing.
That's you, I hope you can see my point.
MET
Jun 13, 2011, 5:10:48 PM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
@Zzz
I think you are mistaken my "That's how people react in those
scenarios" with Abe's "THE FICTIONAL RULES SAY OTHERWISE"
My point was that regardless of all, there is usually a set of
patterns that lead to people getting on the case of the yukkuris more
often, but the scenario i'm pointing out goes beyond Yukkuri Fandom
Rule, it's, i don't know if i should call it this but, one could call
it Natural Reaction.
Had you read those stories of animals that kill and eat humans in
small communities and how the people react? That's what i mean, in
those stories people don't just sit around or let the animal do
whatever it pleases, they fight back. If anything, there would be more
reasons out of how the "fictional rules" of yukkuris makes them have
less rights than a potatoe and humans being more than willing to harm
them.
That was my point, it's not much about Fandom Rules, Morals,
Comeuppance for Villains or anything like that, it's about how people
react in such situations and how such reaction, in my opinion, was
needed in this story, specially to wrap up that idea that Yukiyuzen
was stablishing with the "many aspects of animal behaviour", in this
case it would be what happens when Animals go to "far" into the
Human's Zone.
I think you are mistaken my "That's how people react in those
scenarios" with Abe's "THE FICTIONAL RULES SAY OTHERWISE"
My point was that regardless of all, there is usually a set of
patterns that lead to people getting on the case of the yukkuris more
often, but the scenario i'm pointing out goes beyond Yukkuri Fandom
Rule, it's, i don't know if i should call it this but, one could call
it Natural Reaction.
Had you read those stories of animals that kill and eat humans in
small communities and how the people react? That's what i mean, in
those stories people don't just sit around or let the animal do
whatever it pleases, they fight back. If anything, there would be more
reasons out of how the "fictional rules" of yukkuris makes them have
less rights than a potatoe and humans being more than willing to harm
them.
That was my point, it's not much about Fandom Rules, Morals,
Comeuppance for Villains or anything like that, it's about how people
react in such situations and how such reaction, in my opinion, was
needed in this story, specially to wrap up that idea that Yukiyuzen
was stablishing with the "many aspects of animal behaviour", in this
case it would be what happens when Animals go to "far" into the
Human's Zone.
Abe Gray
Jun 13, 2011, 6:39:09 PM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
@Anon Kun
For the record you've dropped the following arguments
I'm not entirely sure if I should even bother, (since you probably
won't read any of it)
> If you want to break my post in single words, analyze them one by one and playing semantics it's cool...
Notice, you're oversimplifying. I broke it up line by line, point by
point. Also, I pointed out grammar mistakes because they made me
scratch my head. Regardless, it wasn't merely semantics since you've
ignored my arguments. I'd appreciate less patronizing, or preferably
condescension more humorous.
>but it's enough to consider the point of my post instead, which is: the story wasn't intended for your tastes, the author had already stated it repeatedly and you still come here to complain.
Stated it repeatedly? The author did not given sufficient warning. I
stated my opinion once, and you immediately tried to shut me down. As
for 'wasn't for my tastes' please see the next block.
My 'complaining' is an attempt to have a discussion, which you seem to
passionately dislike.
>It's not my fault if you didn't knew about any previous thread: common sense would like a new user to read a little around before posting, instead of creating an account just to tell someone that he despise his story.
... This post is confusing. First of all... I'm not blaming you for
anything. Secondly, I know enough about yukkuris to object to a
person's interpretation of them, but my criticism is invalid because
in another thread he mentioned the story? So before I read every story
and give my two cents I need to conduct meticulous research behind the
author to figure out what sort of story he's going to write?
I can't just say I like it or dislike it?
> A new guy shows up and the first thing that he says on the site is "I
> sincerely despise this story".
> He doesn't go to comment the stories that he likes, he doesn't greet
> anyone, he doesn't make any contribution.
> No, the first thing he does is criticizing.
Ad hominem attack. Moreover, shouldn't the author appreciate criticism
no matter who it comes from? Does my lack of contribution mean I'm
unworthy of commenting? Also criticizing does not equal complaining;
try sticking to one.
> That's you, I hope you can see my point.
Okay, your point is that I should not have posted my response even
though I don't like it. Don't post abuse comments in family friendly,
vica versa. True. However, this isn't just my opinion; I found the
amount of plot armor illogical, even more considering typical yukkuri
tropes.
Simply put; I hated this story for my own reason, and I ought to be
able to express my hate in a reasoned manner. Simply telling people to
shut the fuck up if they have different opinions, Anon Kun, is not
productive.
To sum up, I was hoping for a better discussion, to learn something,
but it appears you're not willing to listen or care about my point of
view.
Thus, I will show my listening, and I hope you can learn. I imagine
you will send another block of ignorance my way, but have no fear,
after this I will go back to lurking.
I'm not butthurt enough to argue with someone who simply wishes to be
'right' over knowing the truth.
@MET
Abe's "THE FICTIONAL RULES SAY OTHERWISE"; I never once said I was the
prophet of yukkuri wisdom. If I came across like that, my apologies,
but I still believe there are tropes that should not be subverted
without good reason.
Otherwise, I have no quarrel with what you say.
@Zzz...
I agree with your posts and I admit I should have reined in my hatred.
However much I personally despise this story, I don't and I can't
claim to say yukkuris are one way or another. If Yukkuris evolve to
be human-killers in the fictional context, then so be it; I'll haul my
ass out of this community crying all the way.
On a side note; to my knowledge, American pieces of yukkuri fiction
have had little impact on the japanese community. Most of our
'inventions' have not gone upstream (platinum badges, DOS in the
city), and there is a lot more that come downstream (like House Yu's,
and well everything).
Orthodoxy may change (or may even be an illusion), but until we're
either more integrated or separated from the japanese fandom, it is
hard to say.
tl;dr a certain someone won't listen to me, and I learned something
new today.
For the record you've dropped the following arguments
> People like you shouldn't post.
> There's a big WARNING right on the top of the story
> There's a big WARNING right on the top of the story
>Reading something that you already know that you won't like only to complain right after it's stupid.
>Especially since your criticism is 100% about your tastes (which is not of help) and 0% constructive.
>You basically show up here to say the equivalent of "lol it's shit" without giving anything else.
>I hope you won't take it personally. (Contradiction)
>Especially since your criticism is 100% about your tastes (which is not of help) and 0% constructive.
>You basically show up here to say the equivalent of "lol it's shit" without giving anything else.
I'm not entirely sure if I should even bother, (since you probably
won't read any of it)
> If you want to break my post in single words, analyze them one by one and playing semantics it's cool...
point. Also, I pointed out grammar mistakes because they made me
scratch my head. Regardless, it wasn't merely semantics since you've
ignored my arguments. I'd appreciate less patronizing, or preferably
condescension more humorous.
>but it's enough to consider the point of my post instead, which is: the story wasn't intended for your tastes, the author had already stated it repeatedly and you still come here to complain.
stated my opinion once, and you immediately tried to shut me down. As
for 'wasn't for my tastes' please see the next block.
My 'complaining' is an attempt to have a discussion, which you seem to
passionately dislike.
>It's not my fault if you didn't knew about any previous thread: common sense would like a new user to read a little around before posting, instead of creating an account just to tell someone that he despise his story.
anything. Secondly, I know enough about yukkuris to object to a
person's interpretation of them, but my criticism is invalid because
in another thread he mentioned the story? So before I read every story
and give my two cents I need to conduct meticulous research behind the
author to figure out what sort of story he's going to write?
I can't just say I like it or dislike it?
> A new guy shows up and the first thing that he says on the site is "I
> sincerely despise this story".
> He doesn't go to comment the stories that he likes, he doesn't greet
> anyone, he doesn't make any contribution.
> No, the first thing he does is criticizing.
no matter who it comes from? Does my lack of contribution mean I'm
unworthy of commenting? Also criticizing does not equal complaining;
try sticking to one.
> That's you, I hope you can see my point.
though I don't like it. Don't post abuse comments in family friendly,
vica versa. True. However, this isn't just my opinion; I found the
amount of plot armor illogical, even more considering typical yukkuri
tropes.
Simply put; I hated this story for my own reason, and I ought to be
able to express my hate in a reasoned manner. Simply telling people to
shut the fuck up if they have different opinions, Anon Kun, is not
productive.
To sum up, I was hoping for a better discussion, to learn something,
but it appears you're not willing to listen or care about my point of
view.
Thus, I will show my listening, and I hope you can learn. I imagine
you will send another block of ignorance my way, but have no fear,
after this I will go back to lurking.
I'm not butthurt enough to argue with someone who simply wishes to be
'right' over knowing the truth.
@MET
Abe's "THE FICTIONAL RULES SAY OTHERWISE"; I never once said I was the
prophet of yukkuri wisdom. If I came across like that, my apologies,
but I still believe there are tropes that should not be subverted
without good reason.
Otherwise, I have no quarrel with what you say.
@Zzz...
I agree with your posts and I admit I should have reined in my hatred.
However much I personally despise this story, I don't and I can't
claim to say yukkuris are one way or another. If Yukkuris evolve to
be human-killers in the fictional context, then so be it; I'll haul my
ass out of this community crying all the way.
On a side note; to my knowledge, American pieces of yukkuri fiction
have had little impact on the japanese community. Most of our
'inventions' have not gone upstream (platinum badges, DOS in the
city), and there is a lot more that come downstream (like House Yu's,
and well everything).
Orthodoxy may change (or may even be an illusion), but until we're
either more integrated or separated from the japanese fandom, it is
hard to say.
tl;dr a certain someone won't listen to me, and I learned something
new today.
Trololo
Jun 13, 2011, 9:03:25 PM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Every day Fragtagonal doesn't update, yukiyuzen kills a baby sanae.
Zzz...
Jun 13, 2011, 9:18:28 PM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
That's usually the case...the upstream/downstream thing...not baby
sanae killing thing...
Ah...Japan.
I know this haven't been a good welcome for someone just joining and I
want to apologize here for my part in all this.
It's hard at times to grasp the meaning of what we say online.
Time and circumstance can also effect us in ways we don't really mean
to.
We're a varied bunch here and there's a lot varying opinions. Then
there's also Trololo.
But when we do actually manage to communicate it's pretty awesome, so
stick around.
sanae killing thing...
Ah...Japan.
I know this haven't been a good welcome for someone just joining and I
want to apologize here for my part in all this.
It's hard at times to grasp the meaning of what we say online.
Time and circumstance can also effect us in ways we don't really mean
to.
We're a varied bunch here and there's a lot varying opinions. Then
there's also Trololo.
But when we do actually manage to communicate it's pretty awesome, so
stick around.
Poweryoga
Jun 13, 2011, 8:43:42 PM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Cut the personal attacks out so I won't have to delete posts.
@Abe
To be fairly honest, your first post could've been more constructive.
It's not productive, and you offer no criticism other than "yukkuris
can go around and kill humans armed with 'sharp things" = not
believable and you will refuse to accept it as fanon. I haven't read
all of the story but I have to agree with anon kun in this case: you
came off as a hostile troll (even if your intention isn't that),
especially for a first time poster/long time lurker. There are better
ways of expressing your displeasure with the story. You've also spent
way more time arguing with anonkun than actually providing feedback to
the story, so that's something to think about as well.
Regarding what is "orthodox" for fandom... I'm more inclined to the
side that fanon is what you want to make of it. My yukkuris shoot
danmaku, yukiyuzen's kills people with sharp objects. You can choose
to respect either universe or reference/denounce them if you so wish,
but this community is part of the fandom. Japan has creative ideas,
but is not the authority of yukkuris in any way shape or form. If you
want to reference Japanese works more, that's perfectly fine. But
many of the community will choose to reference both, and accept works
from both sides.
I understand you don't like the story, but please be a bit more
constructive. After all, authors and artists can't improve without
feedback.
@Abe
To be fairly honest, your first post could've been more constructive.
It's not productive, and you offer no criticism other than "yukkuris
can go around and kill humans armed with 'sharp things" = not
believable and you will refuse to accept it as fanon. I haven't read
all of the story but I have to agree with anon kun in this case: you
came off as a hostile troll (even if your intention isn't that),
especially for a first time poster/long time lurker. There are better
ways of expressing your displeasure with the story. You've also spent
way more time arguing with anonkun than actually providing feedback to
the story, so that's something to think about as well.
Regarding what is "orthodox" for fandom... I'm more inclined to the
side that fanon is what you want to make of it. My yukkuris shoot
danmaku, yukiyuzen's kills people with sharp objects. You can choose
to respect either universe or reference/denounce them if you so wish,
but this community is part of the fandom. Japan has creative ideas,
but is not the authority of yukkuris in any way shape or form. If you
want to reference Japanese works more, that's perfectly fine. But
many of the community will choose to reference both, and accept works
from both sides.
I understand you don't like the story, but please be a bit more
constructive. After all, authors and artists can't improve without
feedback.
Zzz...
Jun 13, 2011, 9:46:27 PM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
I actually get what your saying here MET...
I guess in my interpretation of events I'm playing up the part about
how the region is being torn apart by the factional (religious)
conflict.
I'm sort of rationalizing that being preoccupied with murdering each
other, the peoples aren't keen on cooperation or distracting
themselves from killing each other with animal extermination.
They're are living in a warzone and warzones aren't exactly conducive
to normal behavior. It's exhausting I imagine.
Anyways all of this is deduced from the vignette with Satori and
Koakuma.
I might be emphasizing that particular story aspect a tad bit too
much? Well...
I guess in my interpretation of events I'm playing up the part about
how the region is being torn apart by the factional (religious)
conflict.
I'm sort of rationalizing that being preoccupied with murdering each
other, the peoples aren't keen on cooperation or distracting
themselves from killing each other with animal extermination.
They're are living in a warzone and warzones aren't exactly conducive
to normal behavior. It's exhausting I imagine.
Anyways all of this is deduced from the vignette with Satori and
Koakuma.
I might be emphasizing that particular story aspect a tad bit too
much? Well...
Trololo
Jun 13, 2011, 9:56:13 PM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
That actually hurts, though with my failure to make any significant
comments about any fanfics other than Frag's I can't entirely
disagree.
I guess I have mixed feelings about this one? I think I've made it
abundantly clear that I don't greatly enjoy abuse of innocent yukkuri
(for example, the squashy treatment of the koalice), and I think the
notion of yukkuri significantly harming humans is a bit implausible
given the way most people portray them.
The writing itself is pretty damn neat though.
comments about any fanfics other than Frag's I can't entirely
disagree.
I guess I have mixed feelings about this one? I think I've made it
abundantly clear that I don't greatly enjoy abuse of innocent yukkuri
(for example, the squashy treatment of the koalice), and I think the
notion of yukkuri significantly harming humans is a bit implausible
given the way most people portray them.
The writing itself is pretty damn neat though.
Zzz...
Jun 13, 2011, 10:10:45 PM6/13/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Well...now I feel kind of bad...
Just kidding Trololo...did't mean anything by it...
You just had pretty awesome timing in inputting your comment and I
thought it'll be cool to springboard off of it.
I like Frag's work just as much as you do. I just haven't been as
vocal.
Just kidding Trololo...did't mean anything by it...
You just had pretty awesome timing in inputting your comment and I
thought it'll be cool to springboard off of it.
I like Frag's work just as much as you do. I just haven't been as
vocal.
yukiyuzen
Jun 14, 2011, 12:39:14 AM6/14/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Holy crap! I checked this morning and saw 6 replies and figured I'd
answer them after dinner. I come back again and theres another 10
replies! I
@MET
A lot of things were lost because I stripped the story down and never
adjusted the story for it. Its not something I would allow had I
properly edited the story, but I wanted to just churn this one out
just to get it out of my head.
If you want a "consequences" chapter, just keep in mind that "Cause
and Effect" takes place in a single day and the entire story is told
from a yukkuri perspective.
@anon kun
As I told MET, a lot of things were simply stripped out. I tried to
carry them over into the next chapters, but admittedly I wrote them so
poorly written that they're hard to spot.
Clan > Failure (this is the only one I assumed people would get)
Failure > Dead (another Marisa, how did she get there?)
Dead > Cry (the family dies before the story even begins)
Cry > Prisoner (crying out loud vs silent weeping. whats the
difference?)
Prisoner > Animal (desperate situations call for desperate actions.
what would Momiji had done in the same situation?)
Animal > Helper (animals are dumb and hopeless if they suffer injury,
but they still have their uses, no?)
Helper > Arbiter (you got abilities? cool, but it still doesn't trump
an AK-47. Save your powers for the negotiation table or, better yet,
peacetime.)
@Zzz...
I'll write more but I'm not writing anything in this vein again for a
long time. I wrote and erased way too many anti-war/conflict rants to
count.
@Abe Grey
>Doesn't this take place in a
>warzone with such arms and armor? Moreover, there were three humans
>and the yukkuris still managed to kill them.
Armor? Are you a Space Marine?
Seriously, wtf man? The standard infantry armor for the U.S. military
doesn't cover the arms, legs or neck. Thats pretty much every easily
hit spot for a yukkuri plus a vital area. Having 50+ basketball sized
thing stab and slash at you is a pretty quick way to bleed out.
answer them after dinner. I come back again and theres another 10
replies! I
@MET
A lot of things were lost because I stripped the story down and never
adjusted the story for it. Its not something I would allow had I
properly edited the story, but I wanted to just churn this one out
just to get it out of my head.
If you want a "consequences" chapter, just keep in mind that "Cause
and Effect" takes place in a single day and the entire story is told
from a yukkuri perspective.
@anon kun
As I told MET, a lot of things were simply stripped out. I tried to
carry them over into the next chapters, but admittedly I wrote them so
poorly written that they're hard to spot.
Clan > Failure (this is the only one I assumed people would get)
Failure > Dead (another Marisa, how did she get there?)
Dead > Cry (the family dies before the story even begins)
Cry > Prisoner (crying out loud vs silent weeping. whats the
difference?)
Prisoner > Animal (desperate situations call for desperate actions.
what would Momiji had done in the same situation?)
Animal > Helper (animals are dumb and hopeless if they suffer injury,
but they still have their uses, no?)
Helper > Arbiter (you got abilities? cool, but it still doesn't trump
an AK-47. Save your powers for the negotiation table or, better yet,
peacetime.)
@Zzz...
I'll write more but I'm not writing anything in this vein again for a
long time. I wrote and erased way too many anti-war/conflict rants to
count.
@Abe Grey
>Doesn't this take place in a
>warzone with such arms and armor? Moreover, there were three humans
>and the yukkuris still managed to kill them.
Seriously, wtf man? The standard infantry armor for the U.S. military
doesn't cover the arms, legs or neck. Thats pretty much every easily
hit spot for a yukkuri plus a vital area. Having 50+ basketball sized
thing stab and slash at you is a pretty quick way to bleed out.
Skribulous
Jun 14, 2011, 11:04:35 AM6/14/11
to yufa...@googlegroups.com
On Monday, June 13, 2011 7:43:11 PM UTC+8, MET wrote:
Still, all those points aside, i don't agree much with Abe Gray's
outburst, it's not like it's the first or last story on which yukkuris
are able to kill humans, no need to go about "NOT PART OF THE FANDOM"
it's not like it will change the real status quo of yukkuris getting
owned by everything in the world, yeah, that incluiding rocks and the
soil they bounce at. It's like Poweryoga's Yukkuri of War or Zeta
Kaguya's "Rebellion of an Uneasy Yukkuri", no need to cry "FOUL".
To paraphrase a line from a classic anime (bonus game -- guess where it's from):
I'm glad I scrapped the continuation of my fic, else it'd be lumped in with those examples.
Skribulous
Jun 14, 2011, 11:05:48 AM6/14/11
to yufa...@googlegroups.com
On Tuesday, June 14, 2011 9:03:25 AM UTC+8, Trololo wrote:
Every day Fragtagonal doesn't update, yukiyuzen kills a baby sanae.
Sanaeaki will not be happy when word of this goes out to OYP proper.
Skribulous
Jun 14, 2011, 11:09:08 AM6/14/11
to yufa...@googlegroups.com
Your story has merit, and has potential to be a classic. It's the delivery that ruins it.
I have to side with anon kun for once: breaking it up in small message bits is a mistake, and not just a stylistic misstep. You haven't taken into consideration how this will be read, and receiving more than a dozen-odd emails in one go is no different from spamming.
I have to side with anon kun for once: breaking it up in small message bits is a mistake, and not just a stylistic misstep. You haven't taken into consideration how this will be read, and receiving more than a dozen-odd emails in one go is no different from spamming.
TexasEasy
Jun 15, 2011, 3:53:08 AM6/15/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Hey yuki, don't mind the hate, I enjoyed it. A little incoherent, but
the yukkuri slashers only added to the weird, off-color surrealism.
the yukkuri slashers only added to the weird, off-color surrealism.
Atzumo Kayami
Jun 15, 2011, 9:12:59 AM6/15/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Well, i thought that breaking up the story like that gave a nice
effect to it, just like the author intended. Also, set the mail thingy
to daily
effect to it, just like the author intended. Also, set the mail thingy
to daily
Particle Man
Jun 15, 2011, 6:20:40 PM6/15/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
I enjoyed the story, and its format.
But. As for yukkuri killing humans. A subversion of a trope is fine
too -- as long as it stays a subversion. I want my guro and drama to
be made of flour skin and bean paste, not flesh and blood. So I hope
strays defeating (and... eating) humans don't become the norm.
But. As for yukkuri killing humans. A subversion of a trope is fine
too -- as long as it stays a subversion. I want my guro and drama to
be made of flour skin and bean paste, not flesh and blood. So I hope
strays defeating (and... eating) humans don't become the norm.
yukiyuzen
Jun 18, 2011, 2:49:58 AM6/18/11
to Yukkuri Fanfic Translations
Whew, stepping away from this story for a few days has really cleared
my head. If I ever hit another writer's block, I'll come back to this
story and re-write the whole thing, full-length style.
@Skribulous
Did the delivery fail or did I simply make it too ambiguous? The last
three chapters (Arbiter, Part 8 and the Epilogue) actually hinted at
subverting the whole subversion.
To answer @Particle Man at the same time:
The story only seems like a full-on guro story if you ignore the fact
that Koakuma is the "big boss" of the area and is on such good terms
with humans that she can bring a Satori yukkuri to the negotiations
(ok, seriously, NO ONE picked up on this? Theres TWO YUKKURIS in the
room when people are discussing possible ANTI-YUKKURI MEASURES).
@Atzumo Kayami
I don't get e-mails from the group at all, ;) I was considering
posting this story one chapter at a time, but then changed my mind
when I realized everyone would riot against the guro. By posting it
all at once, I kinda hoped people would realize :
A: Boss Reimu's clan is effectively destroyed
B: Boss Reimu does not constitute the majority
C: In spite of the war/conflict/fighting, yukkuris are still at the
bottom of the shitlist, organization be damned
my head. If I ever hit another writer's block, I'll come back to this
story and re-write the whole thing, full-length style.
@Skribulous
Did the delivery fail or did I simply make it too ambiguous? The last
three chapters (Arbiter, Part 8 and the Epilogue) actually hinted at
subverting the whole subversion.
To answer @Particle Man at the same time:
The story only seems like a full-on guro story if you ignore the fact
that Koakuma is the "big boss" of the area and is on such good terms
with humans that she can bring a Satori yukkuri to the negotiations
(ok, seriously, NO ONE picked up on this? Theres TWO YUKKURIS in the
room when people are discussing possible ANTI-YUKKURI MEASURES).
@Atzumo Kayami
I don't get e-mails from the group at all, ;) I was considering
posting this story one chapter at a time, but then changed my mind
when I realized everyone would riot against the guro. By posting it
all at once, I kinda hoped people would realize :
A: Boss Reimu's clan is effectively destroyed
B: Boss Reimu does not constitute the majority
C: In spite of the war/conflict/fighting, yukkuris are still at the
bottom of the shitlist, organization be damned
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