Do your sheets always match? New BLOG!
Shane B. Kulman MS SpEd
Since moving into a sublet situation, most of my “stuff” (furniture, clothing etc. is with me, some is in storage and some is in my homebase apartment)
I have been tested in so many areas in regards to what a “perfect” home looks and feels like. How important is my “stuff” to making me feel complete? As a Mom how much does being “perfect” take you away from being present with your family and children?
I have two bedrooms for the first time, one bed is smaller than my own. I was having a guest sleep over, and felt a tremendous YUCKY feeling about offering them a bed with mis matched sheets! I had to get over it and it wasn’t easy, I took time and journaled about it and took a 5 minute meditation to get settled and not be apologetic for offering a mis-matched sheet set to my guest! I didn’t want to have any shame or embarrassment around it.
Immediately I thought of all my clients, who describe their home as
- Chaotic
- A disaster
- Looks like a bomb hit it
- Always a mess
- Gross
- How do you describe your home? ____________
These descriptions keep the home from having
- Playdates
- Mom gatherings
- Parent community dinners
- Extended family from visiting
What your children learn from this:
- Shame (messy or not, kids sense your feelings about your home)
- Embarrassment (kids learn that their home must not “be enough”
- Being social only happens outside the home
- Being social may only cost money to be fun
- Whats your take?
I invite you to turn on some awareness in your thoughts on
- How your cleaning impacts your child?
- How your lack of cleaning impacts your family?
- Can your child/family be aware of their own responsibilities and teamwork opportunities to support their environment?
- Are you being a total servant to the loved ones in your home?
- How much pressure do you put on yourself to be “perfect?”
- Where have certain beliefs originated from? Are these home beliefs helpful to your family? Are they yours or have they been passed on from someone or somewhere else?
- If you could ask for help in home responsibilities? What would you ask for help with?
Thank you for reading!
Love,
Shane