Celia A few suggestions to consider for your Tanka Jill

[jill stockinger]

Celia-- Here are some suggestions "to think about!"

Please ignore any that don't work for you.  Jill

 TANKA (5-7-5-7-7) by Celia McCauley

 

Enjoyed lunch with friends

Food, talk and laughs for two hours (slightly better word choices, I think)

Only kindness shown

We shared “colorful remarks,”

but no malicious gossip.

 

Time for my haircut

The hairdresser welcomes me

It may be too soon

My smile shows hesitation

But “all is well that ends well”

 

Kids call her by name

There are pats and friendly smiles

but she hurries by

She is putting business first

going to the park

(Possibly? I think this wording may be a Little smoother--Jill)

[Celia Mccauley]

Thank you Jill. "I'll think about it." :)

Yahoo Mail: Search, Organize, Conquer

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