The Quick Fix

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Brandi

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May 18, 2011, 7:20:10 PM5/18/11
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My husband told me he had a job interview and I instantly saw myself packing up my favourite things and finally get rid of all the shabby crap. I imagined a new job for me in our new city that lights me up. During my fantasy I checked out, I stopped showing up at work and home. My holographic life started reflecting my internal state. Mini crisis popped up all over- I felt overwhelmed, cranky, tired-my husband said I seemed distant. When he found out he was not chosen, there was lots of movement inside of me. My body had been waving all week as it doesn't seem to like to not showing up anymore. I breathed and breathed, and the waves came. Full on waves of tears-Wave after wave after wave. 

 

I will be honest- I wanted a quick fix to change my life, forgetting that I create it all-that life is a one big metaphor just for me- inviting me to engage and play. Not Showing Up was the invitation for me to see me from a different perspective. I am still getting to know this person. The truth is that I have been living as if I am a day away from leaving. Looking at my past, this is not a new pattern. I put up with my wobbly nightstand table that drives me utterly mad, because I will buy a better one later-good enough for now.  I can de-clutter my closet later, my crappy couch is good enough for now. I live as if I am waiting for my real life to start…Temporary living. I also realize as i look around my apartment that i have been dragging around some of the same so called "shabby" things from move to move to move. 


I know there is nothing to fix, and I don’t know what the next step is. I know that the invitation is for me to ask the big questions that will bring me home. Gratitude to all out there for letting me be ME in this space. 


Aloha Brandi

LJWeiss

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May 18, 2011, 8:27:45 PM5/18/11
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Brandi,
I will use a quote from Louise...'the good news is your body is waking
up...the bad news is your body is waking up" :-) Yes, I know it well
to doze off for a bit and how quickly my body responds. Now it's
instantaneous...no dozing for me. For me it shows up as exhaustion and
aching pain, I notice and I get to choose. That is the beauty of it
all, I get to choose, I get to choose how my life unfolds and if I
don't like it I get to start all over in the next breath.

The acceleration that is taking place is unbelievable, how magnificent
of me to create you on my holodeck!

Mahalo!
Lisa

Louise LeBrun

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May 18, 2011, 10:43:56 PM5/18/11
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Mahalo for this, Brandi... for the notion of Temporary Living.  As I read your words, I could feel my body tighten, as if I were stuck in the longest of moments... trapped in inhaling and holding my breath.  Life really is lived in the willingness to exhale myself into my life !

Thank you for this timely reminder. 

Aloha!
Louise
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Sandra Heron

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May 19, 2011, 7:13:29 AM5/19/11
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Dear Brandi, I remember when I realised that I was doing things that were "good enough" or that "it was better than nothing."  I mean partners, programs, jobs, many many facets of my life.  As I read your writing, it is the metaphor of the, "wobbly nightstand table" that stood out for me.  Not for one millisecond.  Your willingness to engage your life differently is very contagious, indeed.

Sandy
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With much delight in experiencing my journey and being a safe witness to you unfolding into the more of you.

Sandy Heron
Creating for Creations' sake

BodyKnowledge

Website: www.sandraheron.com
Phone: 613-839-2601

Quantum Coaching Practice
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At the deepest level, the body is a field of energy, transformation, and intelligence, constantly renewing itself and offering infinite potential for health and healing. David Simon, M.D.


Brandi

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May 19, 2011, 11:22:10 AM5/19/11
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And the best part of this new way of living is that I get the insight of the temporary life, laugh, and move on. No more dragging the story along and ruminating over and over it. That is truly the best part.
I am so happy you are all on my holodeck:)
 
Brandi

From: Sandra Heron <sandr...@gmail.com>
To: womenga...@googlegroups.com
Sent: Thu, May 19, 2011 7:13:29 AM
Subject: Re: The Quick Fix
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