idk what to do

Stevenmichael Collett

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Dec 6, 2009, 12:58:27 PM12/6/09

to Witches, and Wiccans, and Pagans.

Long story I will try to make it short. I was dating this girl who I
got out of a bad situation. I drove 5 in a half hours to get her. We
dated pretty much three or four days she broke up with me still
expects me to take care of her cuz she dosnt know or have anybody down
here to go to. She now wants to move back to where she was in a real
bad situation and wants me to move with her. Then I would be in a bad
situation if I go, but if I dont go she wont have any place to live up
there and to make things worse she's pregnant, no not mine. She wont
get help up there from friends or family. I dont know what I am
supposed to do. As a Pagan I feel like I should go with her to help
her even though I would be in a real bad situation myself but she
wouldnt be. But on the other hand I dont want to because she lied to
me and played me. I'm lost and confused as to what to do. I dont want
to feel bad for sending her home with no home at all but I dont want
to be homeless either. I feel like an idiot for even helping her in
the first place

howard boyd

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Dec 6, 2009, 3:36:21 PM12/6/09

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It would be better to ask the gods and goddess for advice to see what they would say. My advice for you to is to help her and try to stay positive and don't look back at all just keep your head up and look on the bright side. If you move in with her just keep your eyes on the light and don't ever look back. Why? Because I had to learn the hard way and also I had no place to live as well and I had no choice to move in with someone who I know and it work. So... therefore just keep on the positive side and never the negative side cause that is how you will make your life more easier to get through. As for me to you it is best if you help her cause she is pregnant. It would be wise to help her and just think about her future and plus the child as well. Don't let her past get in front of you just help her to move into the future. We who are pagan never let our past bother us cause it is forbidden to bring up the past. Move on to the brighter future and you do have a bright future ahead of you and so does the pregnant woman and plus her child as well. This is the month of Christmas and it would be wise to help her cause Christmas is just around the corner. Anyway, I better let you go for now and may the gods and goddess be with you and be of your guide blessed be and merry part and happy Christmas.

                                                                       Merry Christmas,
                                                                       Kyle Dragon-Heart
                                                                      (High Priest and High rank Wizard)

Jeff

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Dec 6, 2009, 4:51:15 PM12/6/09

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Um, you realize that Christmas is a Christian thing…right? Christ Mass… Celebrate the Birth of Jesus Christ, aka Yeshiva bin Joseph, aka The Messiah, aka Son of the One True God.

This is not really a Pagan/Wiccan/Witch concept there..

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Stevenmichael Collett

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Dec 6, 2009, 5:46:45 PM12/6/09

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Thanks for the advice. I know what I need to do now.

On Dec 6, 3:51 pm, "Jeff" <whitel...@gmail.com> wrote:
> Um, you realize that Christmas is a Christian thing.right? Christ Mass.

> Celebrate the Birth of Jesus Christ, aka Yeshiva bin Joseph, aka The
> Messiah, aka Son of the One True God.
>
> This is not really a Pagan/Wiccan/Witch concept there..
>

> For more options, visit this group athttp://groups.google.com/group/witches-and-wiccans-and-pagans?hl=en

Jeff

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Dec 6, 2009, 5:55:40 PM12/6/09

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Sounds like you were the proverbial fire extinguisher. She used you to put
out a fire an now wants to hang you back in the bracket...out of the way.

My take is, you helped her....now, let her make her own way ON HER OWN,
since she does not want to make her way with you. Being Pagan has nothing
to do with it really. You need to protect yourself. If being involved with
her...helping her, etc, puts you at risk, then she needs to fend for
herself.
If you have ANY other obligations, then you need to protect your ability to
meet those first. Family and friends, work, etc

Jeff

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Dec 6, 2009, 5:58:33 PM12/6/09

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Actually I was talking to Kyle. I sent you a different email. :)

-----Original Message-----
From: Stevenmichael Collett [mailto:elderra...@gmail.com]

Stevenmichael Collett

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Dec 6, 2009, 6:00:15 PM12/6/09

to Witches, and Wiccans, and Pagans.

Yeah your right jeff, I have a lot of things to think about. I just
need to put my faith in the Goddess and hope that she opens a door for
me.

> For more options, visit this group athttp://groups.google.com/group/witches-and-wiccans-and-pagans?hl=en

Jeff

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Dec 6, 2009, 6:05:00 PM12/6/09

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Very true...but, like the Christian God, SHE often helps those who help
themselves. Kinda like asking HER to let you win the lottery...you need to
buy a ticket...ya know?

-----Original Message-----
From: Stevenmichael Collett [mailto:elderra...@gmail.com]
Sent: Sunday, December 06, 2009 6:00 PM
To: Witches, and Wiccans, and Pagans.

Subject: [witches and wiccans and pagans] Re: idk what to do

lemuria rayne

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Dec 7, 2009, 7:53:33 AM12/7/09

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lemuria rayne

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Dec 7, 2009, 7:54:17 AM12/7/09

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Hi. wow, you certainly in a perdicament. As a pagan we are not supposed to cause undo harm; that includes yourself. Help her find a shelter to go to. there are many out there. if this is a domestic violent situation, there are plenty. I know. I am a suvivor of domestic violence...dec. 26 it will be 8 years. I had nothing when i left. i rebuilt with two very young boys. Don't feel like an idiot. you did what you felt was right. sounds like you have a very big heart. don't lose that, not many of us left like that. like i said, help her find a shelter, and just explain how you feel to her. If she doesn't understand, then she is not a very good friend. Good luck and let me know how it goes.

lemuria

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Cheri Cicchetti

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Dec 7, 2009, 2:18:02 PM12/7/09

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You seem to have gotten yourself into a situation, from what you stated, I can understand that you want to help, but you are probably right, about being used. It feels to me that this girl is looking for you to bail her out of the trouble she got herself into, and my gut is telling me that she is trying to use you, and as soon as someone else comes along with more to give she is going to move to the next man. As a woman, a pregnant woman there are many options open to her, and all she has to do is put some effort onto finding help, which it seems like she doesn't want to try, she wants everyone else to do the work for her. Ask yourself this, what would she do if you weren't an option. I just don't want you to make a mistake, and have her ruin your life.

Good luck either way. BB

Cheri C.

Stevenmichael Collett

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Dec 8, 2009, 1:48:34 PM12/8/09

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I do feel hurt and used....again. I do find myself in these situations
more then I care to admit. I just thought or rather hopped that this
times was different.

On Dec 7, 1:18 pm, Cheri Cicchetti <cheri...@gmail.com> wrote:
> You seem to have gotten yourself into a situation, from what you
> stated, I can understand that you want to help, but you are probably
> right, about being used. It feels to me that this girl is looking for
> you to bail her out of the trouble she got herself into, and my gut is
> telling me that she is trying to use you, and as soon as someone else
> comes along with more to give she is going to move to the next man.
> As a woman, a pregnant woman there are many options open to her, and
> all she has to do is put some effort onto finding help, which it seems
> like she doesn't want to try, she wants everyone else to do the work
> for her. Ask yourself this, what would she do if you weren't an
> option. I just don't want you to make a mistake, and have her ruin
> your life.
>
> Good luck either way. BB
>
> Cheri C.
>

> On Dec 7, 2009, at 7:53 AM, lemuria rayne <lemuriara...@gmail.com>
> wrote:
>
>
>
>
>
> > On Sun, Dec 6, 2009 at 3:36 PM, howard boyd <kyledragonheart2...@gmail.com

> > For more options, visit this group athttp://groups.google.com/group/witches-and-wiccans-and-pagans?hl=en

>
> > Trolls will be roundly mocked and banned.
>
> > --
> > )O(.....bright blessings......
> > --
> > You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
> > Groups "Witches, and Wiccans, and Pagans." group.
> > To post to this group, send email to witches-and-wic...@googlegroups.com
> > To unsubscribe from this group, send email to witches-and-wiccans-a...@googlegroups.com

> > For more options, visit this group athttp://groups.google.com/group/witches-and-wiccans-and-pagans?hl=en

Donna Caldwell

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Dec 11, 2009, 4:13:11 PM12/11/09

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Being Pagan does not mean we have to allow another to use us as a doormat. No offense, but you're talking as if you are helpless and have no choice but to let others lead you around and take advantage of you. Why would you give your power over to someone else? There is nothing wrong with taking care of ourselves first. And be careful; drama is quite addictive. Just my opinion, but in answer to your question "What am I supposed to do?" You're supposed to walk away and allow this person to follow her own path, destructive or not. If she is homeless, it is because she, as you stated, has turned down the offered help. She is making her decisions, and by being her puppet you are only inviting agony for yourself and enabling her in her refusal to grow up.

Think about it.

Blessed Be,

SWR

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howard boyd

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Dec 11, 2009, 6:48:26 PM12/11/09

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Donna I quite disagree with you cuz if the girl is pregnant and help is in need. As for me as a pagan. I think she does need help cuz we pagan should help cuz out of goodness of heart and do for the greater good is in at hand. If you don't like to do for the greater good then why should you be a pagan. In the Paganism scroll that says "Do what for the greater good and do good deeds to others by helping other to lead a good path and that path shall be in the hands of those who needs it." I know and that is what Merlin would want us to do and he is watching over us along with the gods and goddess and I would be sadden if the girl dont have help that she needs. Then that would be upon the person hands as for personal gain. I detest those who does "Personal Gain". The gods and goddes would cry out their tears cuz they are in pain of what we are doing. Also, Steven is the only person to make his own decision therefore we cannot make his decision on rather or not that he will or will not help the girl. That is the end of the discussion and no more to discuss this to steven. Steven this is for you. I would want you to make the right decision dont let other decide for you make the right choice. Well, that is all for now Happy Yule and Merry New Years

Jeff

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Dec 11, 2009, 7:34:14 PM12/11/09

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Oh my…where to start where to start….

Howard,

Not sure where you are getting your info. It certainly has nothing to do with real world paganism (a collective header by the way, not a religion in and of itself)

We have give this fellow good advice. The girl is bad news for him and he tried to help, only to get burnt. He needs to stay away from her and take care of himself those obligations that are his.

And what in the name of Macha is this scroll of which you speak?? It is not a canon document within the Pagan community. Indeed, what is proper for one group is not for another and there are no canon documents anyway. I am bound by no oath, except those I freely make and I have never signed on to be a door mat. To say that “Pagans do this and Pagans do that” is incorrect and one of the mistakes that many new Pagans make based on TV shows or fantasy books. The word Pagan is a header for MANY religious and spiritual paths and you can not use it to make blanket statement about the community.

As for personal gain, there is NOTHING wrong with personal gain unless one harms another to bring it about. Why do we have vendors at Pagan fairs and gatherings? Are they supposed to give away their items? If I am a house painter and you wish me to paint your house, am I supposed to do it for free??? This is yet another concept that fans of the TV show Charmed frequently think applies to real Pagan practices.

And Merlin? To which Merlin do you refer. There were several, from different parts of the UK. You really need to put down the Douglas Monroe books.

And to which Gods and Goddesses do you refer? There are quite a few who would quite probably laugh at you and tell you to bother them no more, simply for having the gall to speak for them, let alone suggest they would cry about anything relating to us puny humans. You know, it is the height of hubris to try to speak for the Gods.

As for your wished, Thank you, I will endeavor to enjoy a blessed Yule this year, and thank you also, for I DID have a wonder New Years (at Samhain, when my new year begins)

Do yourself a favor, find some good sources on info and read and study. There are many beautiful paths of paganism ut there without trying to apply a Pagan template to what amounts to Christianity.

Peace and Light

Jeff

Aka The Arbiter (I say this because I am changing my email, so look for me as the Arbiter soon. J )

From: witches-and-wic...@googlegroups.com [mailto:witches-and-wic...@googlegroups.com] On Behalf Of howard boyd

Sent: Friday, December 11, 2009 6:48 PM
To: witches-and-wic...@googlegroups.com

Jeff

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Dec 11, 2009, 8:03:41 PM12/11/09

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Oh wow, I should have proof read the hell out of my reply. Sorry guys and gals. Trying to eat and type at the same time just means I do neither very well. : (

From: Jeff [mailto:whit...@gmail.com]
Sent: Friday, December 11, 2009 7:34 PM
To: 'witches-and-wic...@googlegroups.com'
Subject: RE: [witches and wiccans and pagans] idk what to do