Oh. My. God.

[RichardLynch]

Okay, my co-worker just about jumped up and down in excitement when I
showed him we were taking 0.5 seconds just to load up some silly
YouTube on the homepage that we could Ajax away, and we were blowing
0.5 seconds in a sharding DB lookup for a table that probably won't
ever need to be sharded, and...

FINALLY something like kcachegrind that I can install on a Windows DEV
box without a CS degree!

THANK YOU!

And BIG thanks to Derick.

I've tried to use XDebug about 5 times, and this time I actually got
something useful out of it -- not because there's anything wrong with
it, but only because I could never get it installed right...

Now if I could just get some kind of JIT IDE debugger (for free) that
actually kicks in for an error/exception I'd be all set...