PNN Sept 19

[scout]

PNN - Sept. 19

From the PNN News Desk... The producer of PNN would like to apologize for being offline due to technical difficulties. Apparently, the station antenna was disconnected, unknown to us. We are working with investigators to determine how this could have happened. We hope that it is not the result of foul play, but we suspect it may be an act of revenge from rival station we scooped Monday evening. Our reporters are slowly reconnecting to the station, and we hope to have some wonderful stories from today’s trip to the Air and Space Exposition. We would like to thank @sandydogs for posting her report from the Red Carpet. Now, back to our regularly scheduled show.

From the PNN News Desk... Good afternoon everyone! We hope everyone has come through the rough weather and has been able to enjoy beautiful skies. It appears from the view on the puppy cam that the big dogs are “large and in charge”. For those just joining the broadcast, Levi and Grace have headed out again to the Air and Space Exposition; we hope that there will not be a repeat of Monday’s escapades. Our sister network, FNN, will hopefully add their reports to tonight’s program. For those of you who are not aware, the FNN (Feline News Network) was created as part of the negotiations to free the kidnapped Palady (see PNN news summary from Monday, available on google groups).  We also hope to take the opportunity to interview some of the big dogs during the puppies’ absence, and get their stories. Stay tuned...

PNN News Desk, I certainly hope Abby didn't tell them how cool the helicopter was or we might have a problem (Reported by Goldensmom)

From the PNN News Desk... @Goldensmom. Yes, we are concerned that Abby may spill the bones on the helicopter. As most EPWs know, what one puppy tries, the others are close behind. We hope that none of the pups attending the Air and Space Exposition signs up for paratrooper school once they complete their service training.

From the PNN News Desk... One of our best reporters has managed to catch up with Misty, one of the “Big Dogs” at the WCC compound. Most of you know Misty as the fun-loving lab, who always has a toy in her mouth. We hope to bring you this special report soon. On a side note, does anyone know if you can fix a broadcasting antenna with aluminum foil and duck tape?

PNN Update... We are receiving some reports that the Dynamic Duo are a hit once again at the Air and Space Exposition! Grace is modeling the latest jumpsuit, which has been all the rage on the fashion runways. Levi has been giving demonstrations on escape maneuvers. We hope to get some on the spot reports from some of our fabulous news team. Now back to the kennel...

Good evening EPWs! Sandydogs here reporting for Puparazzi Tonight! on special assignment from Scout at the PNN news desk. The crowd at the Air & Space Exposition is abuzz with gossip about Levi and Gracie, the brother/sister duet who had a puptacular coming out appearance at this very event only two days ago. In less than 48 hours, cyberspace has been burning up with rumors that Kate Middleton's recent photo expose may pale in comparison to the activities of this seemingly wholesome pair of pups. Tweets and Google hits about these golden blondes reached such a fevered pitch today, that temporary blackouts were reported to have occurred on some websites. I'm currently fighting my way through the crowds at the Exposition center trying to reach the duo to find out more about these bombshell allegations. More later. Sandydogs woof out. (Report filed by Sandydogs)

From the PNN News Desk... Thanks for the report, Sandydogs. It sounds like those dogs are the bark of the show! Although all of the EPWs will certainly agree with this (slightly biased) anchor that the half dozen are truly the cat’s meow (apologies to FNN). We are checking with industry leaders at Apple, Google, Twitter, and Facebook to see if the servers will be able to handle this social media firestorm. Back to our reporters in the field...

@sandydogs & @scout. Palady here. Just arrived at my assignment desk and was about to depart for a location to help @sandydogs, but I must report one of the so-called PNN assistants who goes by the name of Mittens has stolen the pen and pair of reading glasses I keep by the computer. The glasses have been found, on the floor, broken, but the pen is still missing. Will try to get ready for a location feed if I can find necessary tools. I have no idea what has transpired today as I've been out on another assignment. Will report back when I can. Back to you @sandydogs and @scout - wherever you are (Report filed by Palady)

From the PNN News Desk... Thanks for checking in Palady, glad to hear you are working on getting us the latest on the puppies. It sounds as if Mittens is still a little jealous of the puppies, let us know if you need a producer to intervene. We have confirmed with sources that there have been no unusual occurrences at the Air and Space Expo, but that Levi and Grace have behaved very well, and would EPWs expect anything less? Back to you in the field.

PNN News Flash... We have just received a report that the presenters at the Air and Space Expo have become so enamored with Grace and Levi that they will install monitors for the puppy cam in every plane used by the USAF. They hope that watching the puppies will bring a feeling of camaraderie and encourage everyone to support and share the story of these amazing dogs and the humans they serve.

Sandydogs here again from the Air & Space Exposition reporting for Puparazzi Tonight on PNN. I've not yet been able to reach Levi or Gracie, but I have talked to several event goers. Rumors abound about some type of pups-capade involving amateur internet cameras and something called "turkey poses". Not sure what that is, but it sounds like something that might tarnish the squeeky-clean image of these emerging stars. Hoping it's not so. Working to find out more. Sandydogs woof out. (Report filed by Sandydogs)

From the PNN News Desk... Thanks for the update on the Expo, Sandydogs. We have our researchers trying to get some additional details about the “turkey pose” you mentioned. We are trying to reach our puppy yogini for more information. We can confirm that the “turkey pose” is used for meditation, which suggests that the puppies are actually engaged in deep thoughts and reflections when they assume the position. However, it remains unclear what they are thinking about when in the pose. Back to you in the field.

Palady reporting from outside the makeshift "headquarters" of the start-up Feline News Network. I am watching from around a corner as they steal equipment from other newsrooms and reporters. It is not only Mittens, but the cats known as "Tuxedo" and "Sneaky" (AKA Riley and Bean), as well as other cats I don't recognize. I can also report I heard them all meowing with laughter about the antics they pulled at the Expo 2 days ago. On the wall are hanging - get this - dog suits! They put on puppy suits that made them look just like Levi and Grace and got in the space simulator, and definitely were responsible for the antics with the hot dog cart. @Scout and others - I am sad to say in this reporter’s opinion the FNN is not going to be a responsible news source. Back to you @ scout. (Report filed by Palady)

From the PNN News Desk... Well, Palady, we can’t say we are surprised by the turn of events, these cats have a history of covert activities. We are working on deep background checks, and have confirmed that Sneaky actually worked for the FIA (Feline Intelligence Agency) a special ops branch of the CIA. Please be careful on this story Palady, these cats are very determined, and we don’t yet know the extent of their plans. Back to you in the field.

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PNN Newsflash... We have reports of the Puppycam coming back online at the WCC compound. EPWs are anxiously awaiting the return of Levi and Grace. We will bring you more information as our reporters file their stories.

From the PNN News Desk... We have some reports that the camera is a little out of focus. Hopefully, it is the camera and not the EPWs who are blurry. There are some rumors that Tuxedo and Sneaky may be responsible. We are trying to confirm their involvement with Mia, but unfortunately it is past her bedtime.

Sandydogs back for Puparazzi Tonight on PNN. I've finally made it to WCC booth at the Air & Space Exposition, but can't elbow my way in yet due to the sheer throngs of adoring fans waiting to have their picture taken with Levi & Gracie. I'm still trying to get to the bottom of the unsettling rumors about this pair. I have it from a very reliable source at the rival National Pup-quirer that there are emerging reports about down and dirty activities at some type of commune out in the woods. Unconfirmed at this point are alleged sightings of "Bat Boy". (Report filed by Sandydogs)

I have been absent without leave, but noticed in an earlier report that you mentioned foul play, are chickens and ducks involve in the mischief now? Please advise. (Filed by GMM)

From the PNN News Desk... @gmm We are afraid that there may be some poutlry involvement. Palady has reported that Tuxedo and Sneak (from FNN) were involved in the events from Monday night. She discovered puppy suits and other props from the escapades in one of the production studios at FNN. We are waiting for Mia to wake up to confirm the cats’ plot, but it looks like this may be a case of “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest”. Back to you in the field.

This fuzzy camera is definitely the work of Sneaky. I saw him steal part of the webcam for their new "network" while the house was dark. Parts will be missing from many, many things. And be careful of actors that look like Levi and Grace. We must find a way to verify their identity so that it's not a feline in a pup suit. Back to you @scout. (Report filed by Palady)

The report directly from Molly at WCC appears to confirm that things will be missing, broken, whatever due to this start up "network". (Report filed by Palady)

Freelance reporter DHY checking in from affiliate WOMG in central Florida. Sources say that the Space Shuttle Endeavour was seen earlier today on its way to an undisclosed location in upstate Maryland. I have it on good authority that it will be utilized as the ultimate training facility for six saucy lovebugs who are clearly out of this world. Signing out from W....OMG! (Report filed by DeborahHortonYoung)

Attention EPW's - Welcome to the undersea world of Jacques Yves Clouseau, famous detective and underwater explorer. We are now visiting the training area for the newest underwater service dogs, Levi and Grace who will assist wounded warriors in getting back into the swim of things. They have also been drafted to teach Riley and Bean to swim, but in spite of their best efforts Bean keeps climbing the fence out of the test area and dragging Riley with him. The pups are doing their level best with this assignment, but teaching cats to be service cats is... is... is like herding cats for heaven sake. Over to you Scout. (Report filed by GMM)

From the News Desk... Thank you to DHY and GMM for these exciting updates! It sounds like these puppies will be very busy in the next few months. We know that whether on land, sea, or sky these puppies will do their best to help humans (they neglected to initial the claws in the contract specific to cats).

Mittens here reporting for the LEGITIMATE Feline News Network. I want to dispute earlier reports that FNN has been stealing, breaking things, and masquerading as dogs. For heaven sake, we felines have more self-esteem than that. We continue to set up our headquarters and will begin reporting more regularly once we have enough equipment and reporters. We are not thieves or mischief makers! Believe us! @Mittens - over and out. (Report filed by Mittens, via Palady)

This novice affiliate reporter has learned that indeed poultry IS involved. The NTU (National Turkey Union) is "all-a-cluck" over the misuse of the term "turkey pose" and vows Thanksgiving will never be the same....Back to you... (Report filed by puppyaddict)

From the PNN News Desk... Thank you, puppyaddict for following up on this story. We apologize to our viewers who have crossed the road, but we felt this story was too important to bury our head in the sand. Far be it for us to suggest the sky is falling, but the NTU will have work with the Butterball hotline if it hopes to keep everyone from losing their heads. Back to you in the field.

BREAKING NEWS.......W...OMG is now reporting that today's visit to the National Air and Space Museum was INDEED an undercover assigment by spacepups Grace and Levi. In spite of being hounded by pupparazzi all day, the clever cuddlers slipped out undetected (thanks to kitty costumes 'donated' by the FNN crew)! Stay tuned for more breaking news updates on the undercover canine capers...... (Report filed by DeborahHortonYoung)

From the PNN News Desk... The owners of PNN would like to thank Mittens for responding to allegations of wrong doing. In the interest of keeping everyone from fighting like cats and dogs, we would like to request that everyone just bury the bone.

Glug, glug, choke, choke, cough Attention EPW - the cats have left the building with a jumpsuited man who looks suspiciously like Elvis they are being followed closely by Foul Patrol who are trying to 'tail' the escapees. I gotta get a regular job, I'm drowning and getting algae between my toes at the same time throw me a life preserver!!! (Report filed by GMM)

Tuxedo and Sneaks are in a tight blanket conference with little Mia concerning activities that equipment seems to be missing and they are the culprits. When in fact Misty was seen taking several pieces of wire, clamps, lens cover and extension cords around the back of the compound. Seems she and Olive have decided that the big dogs want more outside exposure and petting time on camera and will hold all pieces hostage until their demands are met. Misty has been practicing for weeks carrying objects around hoping no one would pay any attention to her and it seemed to have worked.....Tuxedo and Sneaks are relieved that Misty admitted her scheme but no one seems to know where the cache is located. (Report filed by Pluto7)

From the PNN News Desk... Pluto7, thanks for following up on this thrilling twist! What cunning Misty and Olive displayed! We never suspected them! It just goes to prove, you can’t judge a tail by its wag! Is there any indication that the toys in the puppies kennel have somehow been altered to block the signal of the puppy cam, resulting in the video blackouts?

PNN Newsflash... We have just heard from an unidentified source that the Big Dogs plan to launch their own network (BDN)...Misty and Olive appear to be the instigators, and will undoubtedly get Mia to be their official spokesperson... More details to follow...

Puparrazi Tonight reporter Sandydogs back again for a PNN exclusive update about the "pups gone wild" rumors swirling around celebrity superstars Levi & Gracie. I'm here now with Levi's kindergarten teacher who, for privacy purposes, will be referred to as Ms X. SD: "Ms X - you've known Levi for 3 weeks now, what kind of student is he?" MsX: "Levi is a real firecracker - sweet and cuddly one moment - chewing up the classroom papers the next". SD: "Although he seems like the All-American pup, there are rumors that Levi has been known to turkey-pose in front of internet cameras - do you know anything about that?". MsX: "Goodness dear, I don't know what "turkey-posing" is - is it something like "planking" or "eastwooding"? (SD whispers in MsX ear to explain off camera that turkey-posing involves laying flat on your back, exposing all your puppy parts). MsX "Oh my word - I've never heard of such a thing! Levi is a wonderful little boy destined to greatness". SD: "sorry Ma'm, didn't meant to offend - just doing my job trying to get to the truth of the matter". Palady & Scout back to you. Sandydogs woof out. (Report filed by Sandydogs)

BARKING ....err...BREAKING NEWS UPDATE!!!! The mischievous one known by the alias 'Misty' was just sighted lifting the last piece of puppy-phenalia out of the pen and out to the contraband compound. The one known as "Olive" is keeping Mom Molly preoccupied with kitties and toddlers while the cute cuddly canines take a night swim down by the riverside. Magnificent Mia continues to maintain her innocence...most delightfullly!!!! Pluto7 will be back with an update tonight at 11....reporting from W...OMG...freelance reporter DHY. (Report filed by DeborahHortonYoung)

Tuxedo reports that he has seen Misty on several occasions, alone in the inside pen area and she seems to be 'working' on pushing and tugging the crates, behind the potty tray and was seen at least once dropping an item over the back fence behind the crates. It looked like a black knob with a wire handing out. The lobster and the spider amongst the missing for a few days and then suddenly reappeared for puppy chewing and tugging. Hmmmmmm (Report filed by Pluto7)

PNN – BREAKING NEWS – We interrupt this broadcast (of a very lonely kennel) to bring you this important news bulletin. Authorities have identified Misty and Olive as prime suspects in the recent shenanigans at the WCC compound. Special investigators will be called in to interview the other members of WCC and to search the compound. They have assured us they will leave no bone unturned. Now back to your program.

From the PNN News Desk – Thank you Sandydogs for your insightful interview with Levi’s Kindergarten teacher (and again, the station manager would like to apologize for shocking her with the rather explicit description of the “turkey pose”). The EPWs are certainly proud of him, and expect him to be a model student. Who knows, he may become a teacher himself one day... Back to you

From PNN – And now a word from one of our sponsors... Introducing PupHouse, the fashion house for dogs! You’ve admired the vests for work, but what about the outfits for play? PupHouse is dedicated to only the finest in dog couture! If your dog is tired of the same fashions, try one of the outfits designed by Grace, Abby, Ruby, Penny, and Lucy. For you guys out there, don’t worry, Levi has just the right threads to take you from dull to dapper. Guaranteed to fit all sizes.

From W...OMG! Sources confirm that Misty insists that PNN is barking up the wrong tree. Quote: "Yes, I admit that there is a contraband compound. But experienced EPW's realize that my only contribution to the contraband has been fluffy puppy toys, with an occasional bone thrown into the pickin's. The rumors are true that Mom Molly has targeted me to incubate the next lucky litter, so I was just 'nesting' by gathering toys now for my prospective pups. Now, what's the harm in that???? Wires, cameras.....I know NOTHING!!!" Reporting live from W.....OMG! Back to PNN..... (Report filed by DeborahHortonYoung)

From the PNN News Desk... Well, we have to say this story has had more twists than 6 puppies pulling on the green spider. Thank you DHY for your report and interview with Misty. We wish the next mother all the best! Back to you in the field.

Earlier reports that Mia will be hosting the BDD (Big Dog Networks) seem to have validity. The little minx was secretly filmed yesterday at her new outdoor office working on the opening newscast, when clever Levi swooped in and stole the script! More from Li'l Levi later in the broadcast..... (Report filed by DeborahHortonYoung)

Scout! Palady! Quick - stop the presses, er....internet. I've finally gotten the real scoop on all the catty rumors gone viral about sweet Levi and Gracie. A strapping, good looking man at the WCC both - I think his name is Rick - cleared up all the confusion over the alleged "puppies gone wild" incidents. Seems there are perfectly logical explanations for everything - and a heartwarming story about what the future holds for America's golden sweethearts. First - as to the "down and dirty antics" - it was a simple case of puppies swimming in the creek and rolling in the dirt when they got home. The "commune in the woods" is a lovely, historic home located on 80 acres adjacent to a state park where Levi & Gracie can run and play with big dogs on a mission. As to the "turkey pose" - it appears just to be a puppy phase young Levi is going through. Now, onto the meat of the matter. Levi and Gracie are not internet P### stars - they are PAW Stars. Repeat internet PAW stars. That amateur internet camera is actually run by the most amazing young woman in the world - Molly, with "help" from her precocious and adorable young assistant, Miss Mia. Molly gives the whole world 24/7 access to watch Levi, Gracie - and until recently, their 4 other sisters as they grow big and strong. WCC Executive Director Rick explained the important mission Levi and young Gracie will soon be embarking on to assist the pride of America, our veterans of the Armed Services. As for the rumors..... I can confirm having seen two sneaky felines tweeting their hearts out. Hopefully someone at FNN can put a muzzle on those whiskered rumormongers. Happy to put a lid on this story and turn the news back over to you at PNN. Sandydogs woof out. (Report filed by Sandydogs)

From W...OMG! live......Concerned EPWs worldwide are frantically wringing their hands and wailing "WHERE ARE OUR BABIES???!!!" I'm here live with interviews from the compound. Puppyaddict, what is your concern? "I just want to see my babies ONCE before I go to bed!" Understood, understood. And what about you, Grandpups4me1? "...I am right there with you!! Just want a glimpse of the little lambs before I go to bed!! :-) " And the instigator of the protest, celticat what do you have to say for yourself? "OK, we know SOMEBODY'S home - where are our kids?" Yes indeed, EPWs worldwide are asking the same question: "Where. are. our. babies." Stay tuned for updates on the web's best: PNN. (Report filed by DeborahHortonYoung)

From the PNN News Desk... Tonight’s report will be posted on the Google Group. Thanks to all of our fabulous reporters, you did a wonderful job! We are going to let the late-night anchor and news team take over til morning. That’s the news for tonight, and we are outta here!