Fear Of Dancing And The Dancefloor

[alan gyllenhaal]

I have many a crazy friend. Some would say that I was the craziest of
them all. It does not matter. Some of them I know through dancing,
some of them I don't. You want to know something crazy? Whether
they're my friends that dance for a living or my friends who can't
dance at all, they both have a fear of dancing. It seems that this
crazy fear is something a lot of people have in common.
They even have a name for it now. Yes there's a name for practically
every condition out there, even people who need to switch the lights
on and off seventy times while humming every note of 'We Will Rock
You' on every off switch before they leave a room! If every one of
these conditions is accurate, every single one of us on this planet is
crazy and has at least a hundred different conditions. And you guessed
it, there's a frightening name for the fear of dancing, it's
called...chorophobia.
Now I don't know about you and your friends, but I'm in no rush to
send mine to the doctor's yet...at least not for this reason! I typed
in 'fear of dancing' into Google the other day and lo and behold,
there were 2, 240, 000 websites that mention this. That's a lot of
chorophobiacs! There are hypnotherapists offering services to cure
this, it is actually something that affects people's lives.
Well let me tell you, I've been through this journey from start to
finish. From sitting in the most comfortable chair in the world in
every single room I graced where people were dancing...to being
totally comfortable just dancing out of the blue on any London street.
I have a dancer friend who also does gymnastics, who has no problem
doing a back flip in the middle of his walking and then start dancing
as if it's as easy as 1-2-3, all while people are walking towards him
from the opposite direction (credit to Scotty P Maurice).
So what's the story? How do you get rid of the fear? Well there are
basically two ways:
1. Just dance as best as you can and have fun, irrespective of what
other people think and whether you look good or not.
2. Learn to dance well, and then as you build competence, your
confidence will grow.
Two paths to the same destination. Of course if you choose number 2,
number 1 will start to follow and you won't care what other people
think if you know you're good!
You've all seen the first type, they're dancing, you're wondering what
the hell they're doing but they seem to be having fun and that's all
that matters. I'm sure you've also seen the second type, those really
good dancers and thought to yourself, "Well duh, if I could dance like
that, I wouldn't be scared at all."
Well you want to know something? A lot of those really good dancers
are actually deep down scared as well. Time and time again I have seen
extremely talented dancers, get ultra nervous and worried right before
an audition or performance. They start doubting themselves and become
blind to their own capabilities, convincing themselves they can't
remember dance choreographies and routines. And I'm talking about
dancers most people would die to be as good as!
When I saw this happening, that's when it struck me - it's just a
biology thing. It's your body's fight or flight response where you
suddenly get that rush of adrenaline shoot up your body, jolting into
every one of your nerves and making your knees become weak at the
prospect of what's to come. It could be damn good...or it could be
damn nothing. And at those last moments what's more real to you is how
you could turn into nothing, the lowest of the low, the bottom of the
pit and everything that could go wrong.
It could take a huge paradigm shift, a whole new shift in the way you
look at life in general to erase your fear by the first method I
mentioned above. In fact for some people they never achieve this
shift. Carly Simon is an extremely talented musician who is known to
suffer from stage fright (she used to have her bottom spanked because
the physical pain helped rid her of the stage fright). If she did not
have the competence or desire, she would probably have never got on
stage.
But if you choose the second route (i.e. to build competence instead)
it is a much more gradual experience where you desensitize yourself to
the whole notion of dancing. When you have a problem, it's usually a
good idea to actually put yourself in a situation where you'll be
forced to deal with that situation and become used to it (rather than
becoming used to thinking about it and talking yourself out of it).
Once you actually go to a couple of dance classes, it won't be a big
deal any more. Sure, you might still get a little nervous if you are a
beginner or not familiar with the style, but you'll put yourself in
there, the fear won't do nothing to stop you. So go ahead and dance,
because there's always a new chorophobiac just waiting to take your
place around the corner (probably sitting in a chair).
http://groups.google.com/group/dancejag