Fwd: 3 M I N U T E M A N A G E M E N T C O U R S E
Ajith Janaka
3 M I N U T E M A N A G E M E NT C O U R S E
LESSON 1
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing
up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps
herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands
Bob, the next-door neighbor.
Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $500 to drop
that towel."
After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and
stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her $500 and
leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs.
When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, "Who was that?" "It was
Bob the next door neighbor," she replies.
Great!" the husband says, "did he say anything about the $500 he owes me?"
Moral of the story: If you share critical information
pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a
position to prevent avoidable exposure.
LESSON 2
A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her
legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident.
After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg.
The nun said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest removed
his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once
again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest
apologized,"Sorry sister but the flesh is weak." Arriving at the convent, the
nun went on her way.
On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up
Psalm 129. "It said, "Go forth and seek, further up,
you will find glory."
Moral Of The Story: If you are not well informed in your job,
you might miss a great opportunity.
LESSON 3
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are
walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They
rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, "I'll give each of you just one wish." "Me first! Me first!", says the admin clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a
speedboat, without a care in the world."
Puff! She's gone.
''Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing
on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of
Pina Coladas and the love of my life."
Puff! He's gone.
"OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager. The manager
says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."
Moral Of The Story: Always let your boss have the first say.
LESSON 4
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small
rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do
nothing?" The eagle answered: "Sure, why not."
So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested.
All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Moral Of The Story:To be sitting & doing nothing, you must be
sitting very high up.
LESSON 5
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able
to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the
energy."
"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied
the bull. "They're packed with nutrients."
The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually
gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day,
after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched
at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him
out of the tree taking him for a vulture.
Moral Of The Story: Bull**** might get
you to the top, but it won't keep you there!
This ends the 3-minute management course.
Mahesh Jayantha Kumara
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