New Gheyme: Round 2
Sir Benjamin Nunn
biggest scores from round 1 will be seeded, and cannot meet each other.
Also the points you can allocate are now handicapped as follows:
If you didn't nominate four things, or all of your things have been
eliminated, you get to rate out of 0.9
If you only have one of 'your' items remaining in the competition, you can
rate up to 0.8
If two of yours are remaining, you can rate up to 0.7
one -> 0.6
And if all of your selections are still in the competition, your rating
power is now only 0.5
Here are the seeds for round 2. These cannot meet one another.
SEEDS:
6. Bed
14. Doggy style
18. Eyesight
19. Fanny
21. Freedom
23. Football
28. Google
37. Live Music
56. That feeling of realising that you've done enough, and from here you
can't lose... for a while
61. Trees
And here is the draw, with the seed ties first:
22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that
you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS Drugs
53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard VS
Cypher's films'n'shit
26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut grass
12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a brief shower
BTN
Robert Poleson
Benjamin Nunn mask expected us to read the following bollocks:
>47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
What the fuck is this shit? I thought I beat Real Ale?
--
rob at rjp.clara.net
STOP STARING AT ME IT'S ONLY BLOOD
Sir Benjamin Nunn
"Sir Benjamin Nunn" <ben...@depro.co.uk> wrote in message
news:3jn35nF...@individual.net...
And here are my grades (out of 0.8, because only one of my four items is
still in the competition):
> 22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
0.3 - 0.7, an easy victory for the charms of morpheus
> 54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
0.5 - 0.6
> 18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
Without eyesight, you couldn't see red, so this encounter ends decisively.
0.7 - 0.1
> 33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
0.8 - 0.4
> 21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
A tough, tough philosophical derby.
0.8 - 0.8
> 23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
0.4 - 0.2
> 47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
0.7 - 0.5
> 9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
0.4 - 0.6
> 49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that
> you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
WTF?!?
0.0 - 0.7
> 61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
0.2 - 0.5
> 43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
0.6 - 0.2
> 30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS Drugs
0.7 - 0.3
> 53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
0.1 - 0.6
> 20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard VS
> Cypher's films'n'shit
0.6 - 0.3
> 26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut
> grass
0.5 - 0.5
> 12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a brief shower
0.8 - 0.5
BTN
Sir Benjamin Nunn
"Robert Poleson" <s...@m.no> wrote in message
news:MPG.1d406af5d...@news.clara.net...
> On Thu, 14 Jul 2005 13:12:39 +0100, some cunt wearing a Sir
> Benjamin Nunn mask expected us to read the following bollocks:
>
>>47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
>
>
> What the fuck is this shit? I thought I beat Real Ale?
No, this is one of the two results that the improper poster calculated
incorrectly.
I'm afraid you were narrowly beaten by Real Ale.
BTN
Robert Poleson
>
>"Robert Poleson" <s...@m.no> wrote in message
>news:MPG.1d406af5d...@news.clara.net...
>> On Thu, 14 Jul 2005 13:12:39 +0100, some cunt wearing a Sir
>> Benjamin Nunn mask expected us to read the following bollocks:
>>
>>>47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
>>
>>
>> What the fuck is this shit? I thought I beat Real Ale?
>
>
>No, this is one of the two results that the improper poster calculated
>incorrectly.
>
>I'm afraid you were narrowly beaten by Real Ale.
>
Then this game isn't very realistic, is it?
Roo
> And if all of your selections are still in the competition, your
> rating power is now only 0.5
What a crock of shit. Cunt. Anyway...
22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
0.1 - 0.5
54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
0.1 - 0.5
18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
0.5 - 0.0
33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
0.1 - 0.5
21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
0.5 - 0.3
23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
0.5 - 0.2
47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
0.1 - 0.5
9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
0.1 - 0.5
49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that
you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
0.3 - 0.3
61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
0.5 - 0.2
43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
0.2 - 0.5
30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS Drugs 53,
50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
0.3 - 0.1
20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard VS
Cypher's films'n'shit
0.5 - 0.1
26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut grass
0.5 - 0.1
12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a brief shower
0.5 - 0.1
BlueRoo
--
Saugt das Fett aus meiner Wurst...
www.vanburenbrothers.co.uk
Martin
> Also the points you can allocate are now handicapped as follows:
>
> If you didn't nominate four things, or all of your things have been
> eliminated, you get to rate out of 0.9
>
> If you only have one of 'your' items remaining in the competition, you can
> rate up to 0.8
>
> If two of yours are remaining, you can rate up to 0.7
>
> one -> 0.6
>
M
Robert Poleson
Benjamin Nunn mask expected us to read the following bollocks:
>
>eliminated, you get to rate out of 0.9
>
I assume this means I'm allowed to add my scores?
>And here is the draw, with the seed ties first:
>
>22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
I believe it is only certain types of Toads that have
hallucinogenic qualities, therefore Frogs are useless. Bed,
however, is the greatest invention in the history of mankind.
0.1 v 0.9
>54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
I can eat Strawberries and can't do Doggy style.
0.5 v 0.4
>18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
Eyesight makes UKSF readable, red is just something we use to
catch out the colour blind.
0.8 v 0.3
>33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
One day both shall be combined in the greatest ever Jamboree.
Ben will, of course, miss it due to bizarre, unforeseen
circumstances.
0.8 v 0.8
>21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
A tricky one this.
0.4 v 0.5
>23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
I would have given Ben's penis a win in the last round had I
been here in time.
0.7 v 0.1
>47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
Cunts.
0.7 v 0.7
>9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
Everybody needs to lay a golden egg once in their lifetime.
0.5 v 0.6
>49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that
>you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
Bollocks.
0.1 v 0.1
>61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
Trees are overrated.
0.3 v 0.5
>43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
They work well together.
0.6 v 0.6
>30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS Drugs
If it wasn't for the Ben exclusion this would be too close to
call.
0.7 v 0.8
>53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
A walkover.
0.3 v 0.9
>20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard VS
>Cypher's films'n'shit
I don't know if there such a thing as a great NEW band and I
couldn't give a toss how many other people have heard of them.
0.4 v 0.7
>26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut grass
Indeed.
0.6 v 0.2
>12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a brief shower
I can take or leave both.
0.4 v 0.3
Sir Benjamin Nunn
"Martin" <ne...@mandab.co.uk> wrote in message
news:MPG.1d4074bfe...@news.individual.net...
>> If you didn't nominate four things, or all of your things have been
>> eliminated, you get to rate out of 0.9
>>
>> If you only have one of 'your' items remaining in the competition, you
>> can
>> rate up to 0.8
>>
>> If two of yours are remaining, you can rate up to 0.7
>>
>> one -> 0.6
>>
> where 'one' = 'three'
Errr..... yes. Yes, obviously.
BTN
Kullrad
I have 0.7 to play with.
> And here is the draw, with the seed ties first:
>
> 22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
0.2 v 0.7
> 54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
0.4 v 0.7
> 18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
0.7 v 0.6
> 33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
0.6 v 0.7
> 21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
0.7 v 0.2
> 23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
0.6 v 0.7
> 47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
0.4 v 0.5
> 9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
0.7 v 0.7
> 49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that
> you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
0.6 v 0.6
> 61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
0.7 v 0.4
> 43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
0.7 v 0.2
> 30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS Drugs
0.7 v 0.3
> 53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
0.4 v 0.6
> 20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard
> VS Cypher's films'n'shit
0.6 v 0.6
> 26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut
> grass
0.2 v 0.2
> 12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a brief
> shower
0.3 v 0.5
--
Kullrad (4)
UKSF Best New Poster 2003
"Er, I think you'll find it's the Year of the Brummiecunt this time.
Yam Ki Pa Tai." - Joe Horowitz
Winamp is sleeping: (My Boss is in, probably)
Allen Parkes
<snip>
So I've got a ceiling of 0.7.
> 22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
0.2 - 0.6
> 54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
0.2 - 0.3
> 18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
0.7 - 0.4
> 33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
0.4 - 0.5
> 21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
0.7 - 0.7
> 23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
0.5 - 0.6
> 47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
0.7 - 0.6
> 9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
0.4 - 0.6
> 49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that
> you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
0.1 - 0.7
> 61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
0.3 - 0.3
> 43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
0.5 - 0.1
> 30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS
> Drugs
0.2 - 0.3
> 53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
0.1 - 0.5
> 20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard
> VS Cypher's films'n'shit
0.3 - 0.2
> 26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut
> grass
0.3 - 0.5
>12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a
> brief shower
0.5 - 0.5
--
Al
Kullrad
> So I've got a ceiling of 0.7.
Is that because you're very short?
Morph
> And here is the draw, with the seed ties first:
>
> 22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
0.2 v 0.8
> 54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
0.3 v 0.7
> 18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
0.8 v 0.4
> 33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
0.2 v 0.8
> 21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
0.3 v 0.3
> 23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
0.7 v 0.3
> 47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
0.5 v 0.7
> 9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
0.5 v 0.7
> 49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that
> you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
0.2 v 0.2
> 61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
0.7 v 0.4
> 43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
0.4 v 0.6
> 30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS Drugs
0.7 v 0.3
> 53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
0.6 v 0.1
20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard
> VS Cypher's films'n'shit
0.4 v 0.3
26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut
> grass
0.6 v 0.6
> 12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a brief
> shower
0.7 v 0.4
Morph.
Robert Poleson
Parkes mask expected us to read the following bollocks:
>
>> 30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS
>> Drugs
>
>0.2 - 0.3
>
Only a 0.3 for drugs? All that pot must be clouding your
comprehension skills.
Allen Parkes
>>> 30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS
>>> Drugs
>> 0.2 - 0.3
>
> Only a 0.3 for drugs? All that pot must be clouding your
> comprehension skills.
Ah, yes. It does, hence the low rating. I'm getting bored of it, I think.
--
Al
roondog
> 22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
0.4 vs 0.7
> 54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
0.6 vs 0.7
> 18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
0.8 vs 0.2
> 33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
0.2 vs 0.8
> 21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
0.8 vs 0.5
> 23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
0.8 vs 0.6
> 47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
0.8 vs 0.4
> 9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
0.4 vs 0.7
> 49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that
> you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
0.8 vs 0.1
> 61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
0.8 vs 0.8
> 43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
0.6 vs 0.8
> 30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS Drugs
0 vs 0.5
> 53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
0.5 vs 0.3
> 20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard VS
> Cypher's films'n'shit
0.3 vs 0.3
> 26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut
grass
0.7 vs 0.5
> 12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a brief shower
0.8 vs 0.6
Morph
>
> 0.3 - 0.7, an easy victory for the charms of morpheus
>
Everyone loves my bed, now will you all get out I need some kip!
Morph.
Dat
<ben...@depro.co.uk> wrote:
>Also the points you can allocate are now handicapped as follows:
>If two of yours are remaining, you can rate up to 0.7
I've got no idea how this works:
Wasn't the first round totalled on number of matches won?
Won't one side still prove the winner regardless of a handicapped max
rating?
Are we meant to just fill in our original ratings or are we supposed
to reconsider?
Should I still be permitted to play when I don't have a fucking clue?
I found a slightly soiled £1 note in the bin after the first round.
Can I use it to buy a clue?
>Here are the seeds for round 2. These cannot meet one another.
Kinda like matter and its aunty?
>SEEDS:
>28. Google
>61. Trees
From little things many pages of pron sites grow.
>And here is the draw, with the seed ties first:
Shit, we're on. I can't be bothered cutting 'n' pasting from the
previous round. Here's some random numbers...
>22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
Tough call. I like most fauna. There's one sleeping on my bed right
now. If I placed the bed on a frog it wouldn't be quite as good.
0.6 - 0.7
>54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
Weird. Are all these pairings going to be things we can combine?
0.5 - 0.7
>18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
Hands down. I use to have nightmares about Split Enz as a kid.
0.7 - 0.2
>33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
I've got an aunty named Fanny. Demo hates me.
0.1 - 0.7
>21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
I don't get it why we're limited to less than johnnycumlatelys.
0.5 - 0.5
>23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
I enjoy watching one and can't see t'other.
0.6 - 0.2
>47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
Ah fuck it! We're playing away and I'm bungin' the ref.
0.0 - 0.7
>9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
Recent experience suggests live music can still be solid gold.
0.2 - 0.6
>49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that
>you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
Do we really need another wordy cunt around here?
0.2 - 0.4
>61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
I've touched Nothofagus moorei estimated to be into their 3rd
millennia. I've had runners last a fortnight.
0.7 - 0.1
>43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
Like two pees in a pot.
0.4 - 0.3
>30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS Drugs
As the earlier score will attest, I like Strawberry and can think of
worse things than seeing him happy.
0.4 - 0.2
>53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
Confectionery for the mind. Sweet.
0.3 - 0.7
>20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard VS
>Cypher's films'n'shit
The "that hardly anybody has ever heard" is superfluous. Cypher and
all that he brings to the party is/are just super.
0.5 - 0.7
>26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut grass
Olfactorywise there ain't a huge difference (Have I mentioned that the
neighbour mows dogshit?). Decomposed, both are good for the soil.
Having a sore arse ain't cool.
0.2 - 0.3
>12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a brief shower
Curries are one of my top five favourite foods of all time. I prefer a
longer shower where possible.
0.7 - 0.4
--
Dat
Sir Benjamin Nunn
"Dat" <dat...@yahoo.co.uk> wrote in message
news:8p0dd1pprjh28dp6s...@4ax.com...
> Wasn't the first round totalled on number of matches won?
No. The aggregate of all scores rounded up to the nearest whole number for
home sides, and rounded down for away sides.
> Won't one side still prove the winner regardless of a handicapped max
> rating?
No. Not necessarilly. The item which got the most points in the first round
may not get the most points in the second round. An early favourite may draw
a tricky away fixture with it's original proposer handicapped, and be
eliminated, just like that.
> Are we meant to just fill in our original ratings or are we supposed
> to reconsider?
Ratings are likely to remain similar - however, you should always consider
the context of the *match*.
A good example is eyesight VS the colour red - without eyesight, red may
cease to be relevant, so you may want to rate them differently than if
eyesight was up against Doggy style and red was playing curry away.
> Should I still be permitted to play when I don't have a fucking clue?
Yes. That will only add to the enjoyment and delight.
BTN
Roo
30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS Drugs
0.4 - 0.5
53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
0.3 - 0.1
Michael Cunningham
> And here is the draw, with the seed ties first:
I've got a 0.8 thing.
> 22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
0.2 - 0.5
> 54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
0.5 - 0.3
> 18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
0.8 - 0.6
> 33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
0.6 - 0.5
> 21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
0.7 - 0.7
> 23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
0.6 - 0.5
> 47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
0.2 - 0.5
> 9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
0.2 - 0.8
> 49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that you've done enough, and from here you can't
> lose... for a while
0.6 - 0.5
> 61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
0.5 - 0.7
> 43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
0.5 - 0.3
> 30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS Drugs
0.6 - 0.5
> 53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
0.2 - 0.6
> 20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard VS Cypher's films'n'shit
0.7 - 0.5
> 26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut grass
0.3 - 0.5
> 12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a brief shower
0.2 - 0.2
--
Mike
Sid
> If two of yours are remaining, you can rate up to 0.7
> Here are the seeds for round 2. These cannot meet one another.
> And here is the draw, with the seed ties first:
> 22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
0.3 - 0.7
> 54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
0.4 - 0.6
> 18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
0.7 - 0.2
> 33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
0.2 - 0.5
> 21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
0.7 - 0.7
> 23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
0.6 - 0.5
> 47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
0.5 - 0.7
> 9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
0.5 - 0.6
> 49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that
> you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
0.3 - 0.3
> 61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
0.7 - 0.2
> 43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
0.7 - 0.1
> 30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS
> Drugs
0.5 - 0.1
> 53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
0.2 - 0.6
> 20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard
> VS Cypher's films'n'shit
0.3 - 0.5
> 26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut
> grass
0.1 - 0.5
> 12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a brief
> shower
0.4 - 0.6
Sid
Cypher
@yahoo.co.uk says...
(snip)
> >20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard VS
> >Cypher's films'n'shit
> The "that hardly anybody has ever heard" is superfluous. Cypher and
> all that he brings to the party is/are just super.
>
> 0.5 - 0.7
I've been keeping a close eyerick on this thread and so far yourself,
Sid and young Master Horowitz have covered yourselves in glory and have
comfortable beanbags awaiting you in paradise.
Other cunts gave squat and above hot coals shall squat.
--
Cypher
martin....@gmail.com
>
> If you only have one of 'your' items remaining in the competition, you can
> rate up to 0.8
>
> If two of yours are remaining, you can rate up to 0.7
>
>
That'll be me then.
>
> 22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
0.2 - 0.5
> 54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
0.4 - 0.6
> 18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
0.2 - 0.3
I'm afraid I've got a grudge aginst eyesight for knocking out
Yorkshire. And I can't see all that well anyway. But red is pretty crap
too.
> 33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
0.2 - 0.6
Never having experienced a proper Jambo, I remain unimpressed.
> 21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
0.4 - 0.5
Oooh, philosophical dilemna time. I think I'd rather be understood than
free.
> 23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
0.6 - 0.1
> 47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
0.6 - 0.5
I could vote tactically here, but Google is (almost) da ghey.
> 9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
0.0 - 0.6
No contest.
> 49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that
> you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
0.2 - 0.4
> 61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
0.1 - 0.2
Neither particularly float my boat.
> 43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
0.5 - 0.1
One assumes we're talking "Carlsberg" or "Carling" type bollox here,
rather than a proper German Pilsner or Helles?
> 30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS Drugs
0.6 - 0.3
Not had much drugs recently. Bugger.
> 53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
0.6 - 0.2
Where oh where has our Skyjam gone?
> 20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard VS
> Cypher's films'n'shit
0.5 - 0.2
Thought about this a bit more: "filmS" plural???
> 26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut grass
0.5 - 0.2
> 12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a brief shower
>
0.6 - 0.1
M
Kullrad
>> 0.5 - 0.7
>
> I've been keeping a close eyerick on this thread and so far yourself,
> Sid and young Master Horowitz have covered yourselves in glory and
> have comfortable beanbags awaiting you in paradise.
>
> Other cunts gave squat and above hot coals shall squat.
Hey, I gave you 0.6 out of my alloted 0.7, you cunt.
What more do you want?
--
Kullrad (4)
UKSF Best New Poster 2003
"Er, I think you'll find it's the Year of the Brummiecunt this time.
Yam Ki Pa Tai." - Joe Horowitz
Winamp is spewing forth: Keane - On A Day Like Today
Cypher
kullra...@hotpop.com says...
> Cypher sucked in a lungful of fetid air and screamed:
>
> >> 0.5 - 0.7
> >
> > I've been keeping a close eyerick on this thread and so far yourself,
> > Sid and young Master Horowitz have covered yourselves in glory and
> > have comfortable beanbags awaiting you in paradise.
> >
> > Other cunts gave squat and above hot coals shall squat.
>
> Hey, I gave you 0.6 out of my alloted 0.7, you cunt.
>
> What more do you want?
anything that riles me it is wishy washyness cum fence sittery. Your
love displayed elements of procrastinatory ambivalence, the equivalent
of a two fingered fisting.
--
Cypher
Allen Parkes
Sid
news:1121424957.9...@g47g2000cwa.googlegroups.com:
>> 18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
> 0.2 - 0.3
You know Martin, I am beginning to see a pattern here. I feel that all the
unpaid service I provided to you during all those lonely nights was a huge
mistake.
Sid
Paul C
<ben...@depro.co.uk> wrote:
Just back from me first hols of the summer. I'm so impressed with
Ben's gheycomp that I feel the urge to make an immediate gheyentry
(unless there are rules which prevent me from doing this - if so, then
disregard and fuck off).
>
>
>22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
0.4 v 0.6
>54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
0.7 v 0.4
>18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
0.8 v 0.1
>33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
0.0 v 0.6
>21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
0.7 v 0.8
>23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
0.5 v 0.2
>47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
0.7 v 0.8
>9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
0.0 v 0.6
>49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that
>you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
0.5 v 0.6
>61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
0.7 v 0.3
>43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
0.1 v 0.1
>30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS Drugs
0.7 v 0.0
>53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
0.0 v 0.0
>20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard VS
>Cypher's films'n'shit
0.0 v 0.0
>26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut grass
0.6 v 0.6
>12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a brief shower
0.6 v 0.4
>
>
>BTN
>
Osbourne Ruddock
@news.clara.net:
>>47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
>
> What the fuck is this shit? I thought I beat Real Ale?
It's a travesty Rob, a fucking travesty. This gheyme is seriously broke.
--
Cheers, Os
Joe Horowitz
"Osbourne Ruddock" <stri...@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:Xns9695D6D39ADDFst...@130.133.1.4...
AWTWP. How the fuck the Greatest Person Who Ever Lived, he who is always
right, the fountain of knowledge, and one funny fucking fucker at that, lost
out to a warm watery drink for fat gheys and folkies, I've no idea.
I'd have thunk Poleson was a good bet for the title, tbh. What a bunch of
cunts.
Joe
--
"One man went to MOW!!!11lol!1!" - Jose Mourinho
Jon de Souza
"Sir Benjamin Nunn" <ben...@depro.co.uk> wrote in message
news:3jn35nF...@individual.net...
> one -> 0.6
> 22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
0.3 - 0.6
> 54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
0.4 - 0.5
> 18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
0.6 - 0.3
> 33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
0.5 - 0.4
> 21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
0.5 - 0.5
> 23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
0.6 - 0.1
> 47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
0.1 - 0.2
> 9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
0.1 - 0.1
> 49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that
> you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
0.0 - 0.5
> 61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
0.3 - 0.4
> 43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
0.2 - 0.4
> 30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS Drugs
0.5 - 0.2
> 53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
0.0 - 0.5
> 20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard VS
> Cypher's films'n'shit
0.6 - 0.1
> 26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut
grass
0.6 - 0.2
> 12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a brief shower
0.5 - 0.1
JdS
Osbourne Ruddock
news:7H6Ce.47802$O22....@fe1.news.blueyonder.co.uk:
>
> I'd have thunk Poleson was a good bet for the title, tbh. What a
> bunch of cunts.
I'm thinking of boycotting the New Gheyme just like I did with that Paul C
when he treated our JDOferrings with teh indifferens. But I don't want to
be classified as BTNWrong.
--
Cheers, Os
Dat
>I've been keeping a close eyerick on this thread and so far yourself,
>Sid and young Master Horowitz have covered yourselves in glory and have
>comfortable beanbags awaiting you in paradise.
To be fair it is a very tough draw. It's rather obvious that everyone
enjoys their music and who, given the choice of deciding whether to
stick with their personal favourites or risk everything on the chance
of lighting upon something that could possibly blow them all out of
the water, wouldn't have reason to pause for serious thought? Such is
the nature of addiction.
If you look at the very core of the problem, you _are_ a new band that
hardly anybody has ever heard, ergo you win either way...or it should
be declared a draw without a ball being kicked in anger...or the whole
match should be called off due to the danger of someone getting
injured when you kick the ball into the mirror, or something.[1]
Nonetheless, I could think of worse things than spending a rainy
afternoon lounging on corduroy covered beanbags in Osbourne's music
den, sipping smooth port and chillin' to Kullyphobic with those two
esteemed gentlemen.
>Other cunts gave squat and above hot coals shall squat.
Ok, you've convinced me. Forget all that earlier rubbish. The
traitorous tossstains should be made to swallow molten lava...and
hydrochloric acid...and parmesan cheese. The disloyal douchebags don't
have a tastebud to share between them anyway.
[1]Speaking of all things competitive, when are you going to announce
that I can add the test_teh_knowledge trophy to my bulging cabinet?
--
Dat
Dat
<ben...@depro.co.uk> wrote:
>"Dat" <dat...@yahoo.co.uk> wrote in message
>> Should I still be permitted to play when I don't have a fucking clue?
>
>Yes. That will only add to the enjoyment and delight.
Thanks Ben. You've turned my world on its head once again. Of all the
ways I could delight you.....whoda thunk it would be cluelessness.
--
Dat
Osbourne Ruddock
news:3jn35nF...@individual.net:
>
> And here is the draw, with the seed ties first:
>
> 22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
0.4 - 0.7
> 54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
0.5 - 0.8
> 18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
0.9 - 0.4
> 33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
0.5 - 0.9
> 21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
0.9 - 0.9
> 23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
0.8 - 0.7
> 47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
0.7 - 0.6
> 9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
0.4 - 0.4
> 49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that
> you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
0.3 - 0.7
> 61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
0.7 - 0.4
> 43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
0.6 - 0.3
> 30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS
> Drugs
0.8 - 0.4
> 53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
0.3 - 0.8
> 20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard
> VS Cypher's films'n'shit
0.4 - 0.7
> 26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut
> grass
0.7 - 0.6
> 12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a brief
> shower
>
0.6 - 0.6
--
Cheers, Os
Steve H
then managed to spit out :
> 22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
0.3 0.7
> 54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
0.4 0.7
> 18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
0.7 0.6
> 33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
0.3 0.7
> 21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
0.4 0.4
> 23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
0.7 0.7
> 47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
0.4 0.6
> 9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
0.1 0.5
> 49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising
> that you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
0.1 0.2
> 61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
0.5 0.7
> 43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
0.5 0.6
> 30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS
> Drugs
0.6 0.2
> 53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
0.2 0.5
> 20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard
> VS Cypher's films'n'shit
0.3 0.3
> 26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut
> grass
0.5 0.7
12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a
> brief shower
0.5 0.6
--
Steve
*****General
>> 22, 6; Frogs VS Bed
>
>
>> 54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
>
>
>> 18, 9; Eyesight VS The colour red
>
>
>> 33, 19; Jamborees VS Fanny
>
>
>> 21, 62; Freedom VS Understanding
>
>
>> 23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
>
>
>> 47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
>
>
>> 9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
>
>
>> 49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that
>> you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
>
>
>> 61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
>
>
>> 43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
>
>
>> 30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS
>> Drugs
>
>
>> 53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
>
>
>> 20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard
>> VS Cypher's films'n'shit
>
>
>
>> 26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut
>> grass
>
>
>> 12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a brief
>> shower
>>
>
>
Cypher
@yahoo.co.uk says...(snip)
> [1]Speaking of all things competitive, when are you going to announce
> that I can add the test_teh_knowledge trophy to my bulging cabinet?
wee comp. I'll get onto sorting that out as soon as my brain stops
recoiling from my body actually working. I'm a facking gofer at the
moment, my old man is now onsite ripping shit down and I'm running
around after him with a dustpan and broom cleaning up his leavings.
We have an upstairs toilet that keeps pouring water into the cistern
even though we'd turned off all supply at the tobies and he was up in
the roof twisting this and turning that and getting me to run up a
flight of about 25 stairs each time to see if the water had stopped
flowing. I passed my anus on about the 4th ascend, I was so fucked I
didn't even feel it fall off. To make matters worse we haven't figured
out the air control in the place yet so it is facking warm and I
stupidly keep going to work wearing my thermal top and long jockeys
under my outer garb. It being Wellington you can't walk outside without
the wind whistling around yer bollocks so I have to keep them on or I'll
freeze when I go out to throw rubbish in the van. Fucking turns out the
one of the tobies is facked or so the council lads told us when they
finally turned up. I reckon they took the pish out of the old man too,
one of them stuck a wooden stick on an outside pipe and told the old man
if he listened to one end of it he'd be able to hear the water running
up the pipe. So there I am, sweating like a bastard while my old man has
his ear to a stick and they tell us it will be at least 24 hours before
they can do anything because they have to warn all the other businesses
around us that the water is going off.
All day long I've had sparkies and security guys asking me what goes
where and I have no fucking idea, all that info is in the wife's brain,
not mine, mine is full of holes, after a while I reckon they were just
asking me questions because they liked seeing my eyeballs roll back in
my head while drool formed on my lips as I mumbled "I'll just go get the
wife, hang on" and of course she's up those facking stairs, isn't she.
It is only a two storey building but I climbed the fucking Empire State
today.
Of course the old man is staying with us while we are working on the
place so I can't even blob out at my pc as soon as I get home because I
feel beholden to entertain a tad. Thankfully he is an old 'un so he is
wrecked by 10.30pm, mind you I fucking legged it out of the lounge as
soon as Coro Street popped up on the screen and it was a dire moment
when I heard him and the wife discussing Coro events, I staggered back
into the lounge on 150yr old kneecaps and scoffed at both of them just
to add some spice to my current BTN-like life.
And the old man likes a lengthy crap as much as I do so while he was in
the kharzi living it up with a book I was in here drowning in my own
turds. Then I realised because my time hasn't been my own for almost 3
weeks I still had 5gb I hadn't used so I've been dashing around looking
for movies n'shit and as I type these words its gone 12am and I've
fucking failed to use up at least 3gb which really fucking sucks the
fuck.
Other than all that, its good times.
--
Cypher
Dat
>In article <4vjkd15c157mj9kgk...@4ax.com>, dat_004
>@yahoo.co.uk says...
>> [1]Speaking of all things competitive, when are you going to announce
>> that I can add the test_teh_knowledge trophy to my bulging cabinet?
>
>Yourself, Joe and me makes three peeps who haven't forgotten about that
>wee comp.
Goodo. I'd hate to see it ending up in the bin like Gonz0's desktop
waste of time and Nunn's complicated nine step program that ran for
about two minutes last season.
>I reckon they took the pish out of the old man too,
>one of them stuck a wooden stick on an outside pipe and told the old man
>if he listened to one end of it he'd be able to hear the water running
>up the pipe.
I suspect that they were in fact sharing knowledge, secret knowledge
passed down through the ages from plumber to apprentice. Wood does
react rather well to sound vibrations. There must be some reasoning
behind so many quality stringed instruments being constructed out of
it rather than cheese.
Of course if this kind of information were to reach the public at
large, every Tex, Don and Charlie would just be pinning a few strands
of fencing wire to any old stick and putting luthiers on the dole
queue by their thousands. Best for all concerned if you don't tell
anyone else, just in case.
>All day long I've had sparkies and security guys asking me what goes
>where and I have no fucking idea, all that info is in the wife's brain,
>not mine, mine is full of holes, after a while I reckon they were just
>asking me questions because they liked seeing my eyeballs roll back in
>my head while drool formed on my lips as I mumbled "I'll just go get the
>wife, hang on" and of course she's up those facking stairs, isn't she.
Margaret... Margaret...
--
Dat
Joe Horowitz
"Sir Benjamin Nunn" <ben...@depro.co.uk> wrote in message
news:3jn35nF...@individual.net...
> Frogs VS Bed
I don't know why like frogs so much, but those funny little fuckers
fascinate me. I've no issues with frogs, they bring nothing but pleasure to
my life. Bed is a little more complex, bed fucks with my head. I like
shagging in them, but for some reason they're a continual logistical problem
with regards to my sleeping difficulties. I can fall asleep on a sofa
pretty easily, because I don't want to, because I won't sleep well and I'll
wake up in the middle of the night. If I get into bed, though, my brain
figures out I'm trying to get to sleep and keeps me awake. Cunts. However,
I could more easily go the rest of my life without frogs.
0.4 - 0.5
> 54, 14; Strawberries VS Doggy Style
Strawberries are a chav's raspberry, doggy style is great fun. No contest.
0.2 - 0.6
> Eyesight VS The colour red
A no-brainer at first glance, but then that's eyesight for you. Always
acting in it's own best interests. The colour red is vibrant, and
particularly effective on flowers set against the complimentary green of
their foliage. Red makes for great woman's undies, and adds a touch of
authentic
gore to horror films when used in the form of a torrent of blood. Life
without eyesight would suck, on the whole. However, loss of eyesight
results in a heightening of the other senses, and as such can be harnessed
temporarily for Very Good Things. Mind you, to place too much emphasis on
the importance of colour would be to sell shapes short, and I'm rather fond
of shapes.
A hard-fought 0.5 - 0.4
> Jamborees VS Fanny
Jamboree si teh ghey. Fanny r00lz. Or does it? Again, the underdogs cause
problems here, jamboree is almost invariably held exclusively between people
who've very good reason to believe they would enjoy each other's company,
whereas fanny can be a nasty route inside the body of anything female, from
dead chickens to the oldest living lady, and to blindly dive in without
assessing the surrounding area can be fatal. That's the beauty of the New
Gheyme cup, it's a great leveller and anything can happen. However, it just
wasn't meant to be Jamboree's day, and though it acquitted itself well it
was no match for fanny's strength in depth. After all, a world without
fanny would barely be worth inhabiting.
0.3 - 0.5
> Freedom VS Understanding
These two popular, well-run family clubs go head to head in what's being
labelled "a fucking hippy's match". Except, most hippies probably vote
labour, who want to take away our freedoms and don't seem to understand very
much at all, so there's a paradox there already. Freedom wins this one for
me, there's plenty of shit I don't understand, some I don't even want to,
and it's generally no skin off my glans when a concept eludes me or anyone
else. Freedom, however, is just about the most important thing there is.
The greater freedom we posses, the greater our capacity to enjoy fanny,
eyesight, doggy-style and bed, especially all at the same time, so freedom
deserves at least another chance to shine.
0.6 - 0.2
> 23, 40; Football VS Nanotechnology
I'm not the least bit interested in the latter. I won't be entering the
Yahoo Fantasy Nanotechnology League, and don't intend to follow Charlton
Athletic Nanotechnology Club.
0.5 - 0.2
> 47, 28; Real Ale VS Google
Real Ale is teh ghey. Google is teh yoosfal.
0.3 - 0.4
> 9, 37; Goldschlager VS Live Music
Never tried it, rather like it.
0.2 - 0.5
> 49, 56; Round pegs in square holes VS That feeling of realising that
> you've done enough, and from here you can't lose... for a while
While I'm all in favour of non-cuntformity, sticking round pegs in square
holes is just stupid. It rarely stems the flow. TFORYDEAFHYCL, on the
other hand, relieves the melancholy, and therefore wins this one hands down.
0-1 - 0.5
> 61, 60; Trees VS Trainers
I don't own any trainers. I don't own any trees either, for that matter,
but if I was offered one or t'other I'd probably take the tree. You can
make all sorts of useful things out of trees, or you can burn them or grow
fruit on them, or climb them, or just look at them and soak up the chi
energy. Relieves the melancholy, that does. Trainers just get smelly and
chavs wear them.
0.5 - 0.2
> 43, 35; Pint Glasses VS Lager
Oooh, tough local derby for these essential cunts. Which needs the other
more, though? That is the question. Well, it's one of the questions. The
others are too fucking stupid to type, but rest assured I've thought of them
and answered them carefully in my head before making my decision. And my
decision is Lager. If you've got Lager but no Pint Glasses, you can still
get pissed. If you've got Pint Glasses but no Lager, though, you haven't
much use for your Pint Glasses. Real Ale is teh ghey, and everything else
tastes better out of something else.
0.4 - 0.5
> 30, 16; Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean by you Ben) VS Drugs
Fuck. Two things I definitely _wouldn't_ want to go the rest of my life
without, or even the rest of a typical week for that matter, and which work
even better together. Having your cock sucked, while off your stupid head
on drugs, is totally unseated. However, drugs is a very inclusive category,
that incorporates all the shit I've tried _and_ the stuff I haven't, or
don't fancy trying. I like that. Having my cock sucked (this doesn't mean
by you Ben) is a bit cunty, really. Okay, so I don't personally want my
cock sucked by Ben, but others might, not least of which Ben himself, and to
exclude them for the sake of it seems like the work of a ming-mong. Each to
his own and all that, and free cocksuckery for all. It's a decisive
own-goal for the home side.
0.5 - 0.6
> 53, 50; Star Bars VS Skyjam
No contest here. Star Bars were quite nice, Skyjam is not fitted in the
least bit securely. It's a total mismatch.
0.2 - 0.6
> 20, 13; Finding a great new band that hardly anybody has ever heard VS
> Cypher's films'n'shit
I like finding new music, but tbh couldn't give the first tossing spunkwad
whether some other cunt's heard them or not. I hate that sort of elitism,
and hate the mentality of people who claim to love a band's music, yet would
prefer it if the band in question forever floundered in a sea of obscurity
than gain some recognition for their efforts, just so they themselves can
claim some wanky reflected glory from being the only cunt who appreciates
them. Bollocks to that. Cypher's films'n'shit are some of the best
shit'n'shit there is.
0.2 - 0.6
> 26, 52; Going for a satisfyingly huge dump VS Smell of freshly cut
grass
Oh, dump hands down. Cut grass smells nicer, of course, but I don't think
I've ever been confronted with such a smell and thought "OH my SHITTING
CRIKEY thank fuck for
that!111!relief!11one!1!AAaaaahhhh!11!1omg1111!!bliss!11"
0.3 - 0.1
> 12, 58, Curry VS The smell of rain on hot earth after a brief shower
Again, nice smells are all very well, but a good curry is unseated. And
smells nice.
0.5 - 0.3