Well if we're doing joaks

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Ahem A Rivet's Shot

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Jul 10, 2022, 9:00:01 AMJul 10
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The travelling shaman arrived at his next gig, an island community needing
a sacrificial rite performing. Being experienced in the game he brought
along a spare maiden (a delightful white one he'd picked up cheap) just in
case the locally provided offering proved disqualified or otherwise
unacceptable to the gods.

As it happened the local offering was fine, so he didn't notice when his
spare was rescued by an over-muscled sailor with a taste for spinach.
And that ladies and gentlemen is how Popeye met his wife, the extra virgin,
Olive Oyl.

--
Steve O'Hara-Smith
Odds and Ends at http://www.sohara.org/

RustyHinge

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Jul 10, 2022, 5:06:14 PMJul 10
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We're getting into dangerous territory now - my sister is an Essex Girl...

--
Rusty Hinge
To err is human. To really foul things up requires a computer and the BOFH.

Brian Gaff

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Jul 11, 2022, 4:11:39 AMJul 11
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Groan. The Groan jokes seem to be pretty poor these days, sadly.

An Electron goes into a hotel and gets a room, the receptionist says do you
need any help with your luggage, no, says the photon. I'm travelling Light.
Brian

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"Ahem A Rivet's Shot" <ste...@eircom.net> wrote in message
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Richard Robinson

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Jul 11, 2022, 5:42:17 AMJul 11
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Brian Gaff said:
> Groan. The Groan jokes seem to be pretty poor these days, sadly.
>
> An Electron goes into a hotel and gets a room, the receptionist says do you
> need any help with your luggage, no, says the photon. I'm travelling Light.

And there's a charged atmosphere over the electron's marginalisation.

Are you thinking about these at all, Brian, or just repeating things
you've heard ?

--
Richard Robinson
"The whole plan hinged upon the natural curiosity of potatoes" - S. Lem

My email address is at http://qualmograph.org.uk/contact.html

Ahem A Rivet's Shot

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Jul 11, 2022, 6:30:05 AMJul 11
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On Sun, 10 Jul 2022 22:06:11 +0100
RustyHinge <rusty...@foobar.girolle.co.uk> wrote:

> We're getting into dangerous territory now - my sister is an Essex Girl...

I can think of a recent resignee who might have benefited from the
advice of an ethics girl[n].

[n] Other genders available.

Richard Robinson

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Jul 11, 2022, 6:58:16 AMJul 11
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Ahem A Rivet's Shot said:
> On Sun, 10 Jul 2022 22:06:11 +0100
> RustyHinge <rusty...@foobar.girolle.co.uk> wrote:
>
>> We're getting into dangerous territory now - my sister is an Essex Girl...
>
> I can think of a recent resignee who might have benefited from the
> advice of an ethics girl[n].

Would we even have heard of him, if he had taken it ?

> [n] Other genders available.
>


--

Brian Gaff

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Jul 12, 2022, 4:08:49 AMJul 12
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Thinking, yes, comprehending in this hot weather probably not.

Alexa has some real groaners, I think the team at Amazon don't have enough
to do.

A Higgs boson kept leaving the doors open. Eventually all the other bosons
sad to the Higgs, what is wrong with you, can't you close a door, were you
born in a field, Nothing said the Higgs, I am a field.
Brian

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Richard Robinson

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Jul 12, 2022, 6:25:15 AMJul 12
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Brian Gaff said:
> Thinking, yes, comprehending in this hot weather probably not.
>
> Alexa has some real groaners, I think the team at Amazon don't have enough
> to do.

Is that where the 'Blenda' one came from ?

Tease'n'Seize

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Jul 12, 2022, 6:59:03 AMJul 12
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Richard Robinson wrote:

> Brian Gaff said:
>
>> Alexa has some real groaners, I think the team at Amazon don't have enough
>> to do.
>
> Is that where the 'Blenda' one came from ?

She's too buy telling kids to shove pennies behind mains plugs

John Williamson

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Jul 12, 2022, 7:08:33 AMJul 12
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On 12/07/2022 11:25, Richard Robinson wrote:
> Brian Gaff said:
>> Thinking, yes, comprehending in this hot weather probably not.
>>
>> Alexa has some real groaners, I think the team at Amazon don't have enough
>> to do.
>
> Is that where the 'Blenda' one came from ?
>
The first time I heard that one, Benny Hill was the most popular comedy
show on TV.

--
Tciao for Now!

John.

Richard Robinson

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Jul 12, 2022, 7:15:54 AMJul 12
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Anybody fancy a pointless squabble about the gender identity of robots ?

Ahem A Rivet's Shot

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Jul 12, 2022, 8:30:03 AMJul 12
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On Tue, 12 Jul 2022 06:15:49 -0500
Richard Robinson <rich...@privacy.net> wrote:

> Anybody fancy a pointless squabble about the gender identity of robots ?

The first company to produce a general purpose household robot
that does all the numerous household tasks such as cooking, cleaning,
tidying, washing etc. might best avoid taking their designs from either the
stereotypical 1950s housewife or the earlier domestic servant (especially
Southern American variety).

Indeed they should probably avoid any hint of gender or even human
appearance.

I strongly suspect Asimov was dead wrong and humanoid robots will
only see specialised use.

Richard Robinson

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Jul 12, 2022, 8:45:57 AMJul 12
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What a sheltered life I've led.

I don't think I've ever met anyone of any nationality with a food
processor on their head.

Richard Robinson

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Jul 12, 2022, 8:52:37 AMJul 12
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Ahem A Rivet's Shot said:
> On Tue, 12 Jul 2022 06:15:49 -0500
> Richard Robinson <rich...@privacy.net> wrote:
>
>> Anybody fancy a pointless squabble about the gender identity of robots ?
>
> The first company to produce a general purpose household robot
> that does all the numerous household tasks such as cooking, cleaning,
> tidying, washing etc. might best avoid taking their designs from either the
> stereotypical 1950s housewife or the earlier domestic servant (especially
> Southern American variety).

Might best avoid having it designed by an AI ?

> Indeed they should probably avoid any hint of gender or even human
> appearance.
>
> I strongly suspect Asimov was dead wrong and humanoid robots will
> only see specialised use.

From a safe distance (if there is one) it's intriguing to be finding
out how much of what we do is brain-dead to the point where it can be
described so precisely/completely.

John Williamson

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Jul 12, 2022, 9:00:10 AMJul 12
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On 12/07/2022 13:12, Ahem A Rivet's Shot wrote:

> I strongly suspect Asimov was dead wrong and humanoid robots will
> only see specialised use.
>
That is how Asimov's robots started. They were used in jobs (Usually in
space) where there was a significant risk to humans performing them, and
it was easier to build robots that were humanoid than to modify the
working procedures. It meant that if it all went wrong, they could send
in a human to do the jobs the robots couldn't.

As they became better and people began to accept them, their use spread
into society at large.

We are currently at a stage where self driving cars can do the job at
least as well as humans under certain circumstances, but we still don't
trust them.

Richard Robinson

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Jul 12, 2022, 9:36:34 AMJul 12
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Depersonalisation - there's no-one to get pissed off at if it runs into
you ?

Plus, of course, all the uncertain circumstances.


I was a bit bothered by a car I hired a few years back. The manual said
that it steered itself by following the white lines /so long as you kept
at least one finger in contact with the steering wheel/. So far as I
could make out, if you took your hands of the wheel completely, no-one
was steering it. I didn't test the proposition very hard.

maus

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Jul 12, 2022, 10:04:02 AMJul 12
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I must interject;

When my wife died and the children went away, I got a couple of robots,
a roomba to sweep the floor (kept going under seats and getting stuck, I
made a small robot before that that never got stuck), and a robot
lawnmower that couldn't manage wet grass, so i screwed screws into the
wheels to give it grip, PITA, anyway. One of my daughters would check
what plugs were plugged before going home. Did someone mention
Alexa?..People consiousely having a wiretap in their house? Stone the
crows!


--
grey...@mail.com
ten, twenty million, tops

Ahem A Rivet's Shot

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Jul 12, 2022, 10:30:05 AMJul 12
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On Tue, 12 Jul 2022 14:00:06 +0100
John Williamson <johnwil...@btinternet.com> wrote:

> We are currently at a stage where self driving cars can do the job at
> least as well as humans under certain circumstances, but we still don't
> trust them.

But nobody is trying to molish a self-driving add-on in the form of
a human shaped robot driver.

Tease'n'Seize

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Jul 12, 2022, 11:04:38 AMJul 12
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Ahem A Rivet's Shot wrote:

> nobody is trying to molish a self-driving add-on in the form of > a human shaped robot driver.
They will by 2084

<https://youtu.be/eWgrvNHjKkY>

John Williamson

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Jul 12, 2022, 11:57:37 AMJul 12
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On 12/07/2022 15:28, Ahem A Rivet's Shot wrote:
> On Tue, 12 Jul 2022 14:00:06 +0100
> John Williamson <johnwil...@btinternet.com> wrote:
>
>> We are currently at a stage where self driving cars can do the job at
>> least as well as humans under certain circumstances, but we still don't
>> trust them.
>
> But nobody is trying to molish a self-driving add-on in the form of
> a human shaped robot driver.
>
Yet. Semi-colon - dash - close bracket.

Richard Robinson

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Jul 12, 2022, 12:02:30 PMJul 12
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But, why ?

John Williamson

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Jul 12, 2022, 12:23:52 PMJul 12
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On 12/07/2022 17:02, Richard Robinson wrote:
> John Williamson said:
>> On 12/07/2022 15:28, Ahem A Rivet's Shot wrote:
>>> On Tue, 12 Jul 2022 14:00:06 +0100
>>> John Williamson <johnwil...@btinternet.com> wrote:
>>>
>>>> We are currently at a stage where self driving cars can do the job at
>>>> least as well as humans under certain circumstances, but we still don't
>>>> trust them.
>>>
>>> But nobody is trying to molish a self-driving add-on in the form of
>>> a human shaped robot driver.
>>>
>> Yet. Semi-colon - dash - close bracket.
>
> But, why ?
>
>
Because, when they can do summat, people do, even if it's a daft idea?

Richard Robinson

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Jul 12, 2022, 1:10:33 PMJul 12
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John Williamson said:
> On 12/07/2022 17:02, Richard Robinson wrote:
>> John Williamson said:
>>> On 12/07/2022 15:28, Ahem A Rivet's Shot wrote:
>>>> On Tue, 12 Jul 2022 14:00:06 +0100
>>>> John Williamson <johnwil...@btinternet.com> wrote:
>>>>
>>>>> We are currently at a stage where self driving cars can do the job at
>>>>> least as well as humans under certain circumstances, but we still don't
>>>>> trust them.
>>>>
>>>> But nobody is trying to molish a self-driving add-on in the form of
>>>> a human shaped robot driver.
>>>>
>>> Yet. Semi-colon - dash - close bracket.
>>
>> But, why ?
>>
>>
> Because, when they can do summat, people do, even if it's a daft idea?

If I obhtug a car, I'd want paying to have a humanoid wasting space in
it.

John Williamson

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Jul 12, 2022, 1:18:43 PMJul 12
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On 12/07/2022 18:10, Richard Robinson wrote:
> John Williamson said:
>> On 12/07/2022 17:02, Richard Robinson wrote:
>>> John Williamson said:
>>>> On 12/07/2022 15:28, Ahem A Rivet's Shot wrote:
>>>>> On Tue, 12 Jul 2022 14:00:06 +0100
>>>>> John Williamson <johnwil...@btinternet.com> wrote:
>>>>>
>>>>>> We are currently at a stage where self driving cars can do the job at
>>>>>> least as well as humans under certain circumstances, but we still don't
>>>>>> trust them.
>>>>>
>>>>> But nobody is trying to molish a self-driving add-on in the form of
>>>>> a human shaped robot driver.
>>>>>
>>>> Yet. Semi-colon - dash - close bracket.
>>>
>>> But, why ?
>>>
>>>
>> Because, when they can do summat, people do, even if it's a daft idea?
>
> If I obhtug a car, I'd want paying to have a humanoid wasting space in
> it.
>
Someone rich enough might want the humanoid to waste the space to prove
just how rich they were.

Nicholas D. Richards

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Jul 12, 2022, 1:32:25 PMJul 12
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In article <jj5ong...@mid.individual.net>, John Williamson
<johnwil...@btinternet.com> on Tue, 12 Jul 2022 at 18:18:39 awoke
Nicholas from his slumbers and wrote
Now if the humanoid looked like a namecilop that would not be a waste of
space, now would it?
--
0sterc@tcher -

"Oů sont les neiges d'antan?"

Richard Robinson

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Jul 12, 2022, 1:39:25 PMJul 12
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Eeew, he can't even afford a human chauffeur !

It'd be a lot simpler to get Elon Musk to just fire himself into space.


I've suddenly found myself wondering, would there be more peacocks if
they hadn't developed such a tail-fetish ?

Richard Robinson

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Jul 12, 2022, 1:44:43 PMJul 12
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Nicholas D. Richards said:
> In article <jj5ong...@mid.individual.net>, John Williamson
>>On 12/07/2022 18:10, Richard Robinson wrote:
>>> John Williamson said:
>>>> On 12/07/2022 17:02, Richard Robinson wrote:
>>>>> John Williamson said:
>>>>>> On 12/07/2022 15:28, Ahem A Rivet's Shot wrote:
>>>>>>> John Williamson <johnwil...@btinternet.com> wrote:
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> We are currently at a stage where self driving cars can do the job at
>>>>>>>> least as well as humans under certain circumstances, but we still don't
>>>>>>>> trust them.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> But nobody is trying to molish a self-driving add-on in the form of
>>>>>>> a human shaped robot driver.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>> Yet. Semi-colon - dash - close bracket.
>>>>>
>>>>> But, why ?
>>>>>
>>>> Because, when they can do summat, people do, even if it's a daft idea?
>>>
>>> If I obhtug a car, I'd want paying to have a humanoid wasting space in
>>> it.
>>>
>>Someone rich enough might want the humanoid to waste the space to prove
>>just how rich they were.
>>
> Now if the humanoid looked like a namecilop that would not be a waste of
> space, now would it?

People'd cnl tbbq zbarl to make it look like they'd been arrested ?

*sigh* probably. I Blame Youtube.

Nicholas D. Richards

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Jul 12, 2022, 3:38:15 PMJul 12
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In article <EqmdnUdw0LtaLFD_...@brightview.co.uk>, Richard
Robinson <rich...@privacy.net> on Tue, 12 Jul 2022 at 12:39:19 awoke
Nicholas from his slumbers and wrote
>>> John Williamson said:
>> Someone rich enough might want the humanoid to waste the space to prove
>> just how rich they were.
>
>Eeew, he can't even afford a human chauffeur !
>
>It'd be a lot simpler to get Elon Musk to just fire himself into space.
>
>
>I've suddenly found myself wondering, would there be more peacocks if
>they hadn't developed such a tail-fetish ?
>
Sadly it is not so much the peacocks have a fetish for long tails as the
peahens who have the fetish for cocks with long tails. The hens will, it
seems, go for the cock with the longest tails.

So it is a case of short tail, long life, but no nooky, against long
showy tail, short life and life in the fast lane.

Nicholas D. Richards

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Jul 12, 2022, 3:38:16 PMJul 12
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In article <tIWdnQNK1e2YLlD_...@brightview.co.uk>, Richard
Robinson <rich...@privacy.net> on Tue, 12 Jul 2022 at 12:44:37 awoke
Nicholas from his slumbers and wrote
>Nicholas D. Richards said:
>> In article <jj5ong...@mid.individual.net>, John Williamson
>>>On 12/07/2022 18:10, Richard Robinson wrote:
>>>>
>>>> If I obhtug a car, I'd want paying to have a humanoid wasting space in
>>>> it.
>>>>
>>>Someone rich enough might want the humanoid to waste the space to prove
>>>just how rich they were.
>>>
>> Now if the humanoid looked like a namecilop that would not be a waste of
>> space, now would it?
>
>People'd cnl tbbq zbarl to make it look like they'd been arrested ?
>
>*sigh* probably. I Blame Youtube.
>
Other drivers and scrotes would treat you/your car with respect. Your
car should be safe from being twocking.

Richard Robinson

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Jul 12, 2022, 3:40:33 PMJul 12
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I meant the species.

Richard Robinson

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Jul 12, 2022, 3:41:41 PMJul 12
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Nicholas D. Richards said:
> In article <tIWdnQNK1e2YLlD_...@brightview.co.uk>, Richard
> Robinson <rich...@privacy.net> on Tue, 12 Jul 2022 at 12:44:37 awoke
> Nicholas from his slumbers and wrote
>>Nicholas D. Richards said:
>>> In article <jj5ong...@mid.individual.net>, John Williamson
>>>>On 12/07/2022 18:10, Richard Robinson wrote:
>>>>>
>>>>> If I obhtug a car, I'd want paying to have a humanoid wasting space in
>>>>> it.
>>>>>
>>>>Someone rich enough might want the humanoid to waste the space to prove
>>>>just how rich they were.
>>>>
>>> Now if the humanoid looked like a namecilop that would not be a waste of
>>> space, now would it?
>>
>>People'd cnl tbbq zbarl to make it look like they'd been arrested ?
>>
>>*sigh* probably. I Blame Youtube.
>>
> Other drivers and scrotes would treat you/your car with respect. Your
> car should be safe from being twocking.

Hacking, though ...

Sam Plusnet

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Jul 12, 2022, 3:59:34 PMJul 12
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Silicone-enhanced peacocks will be a thing.

--
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Mike Fleming

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Jul 12, 2022, 4:49:37 PMJul 12
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On 12/07/2022 14:36, Richard Robinson wrote:
>
> I was a bit bothered by a car I hired a few years back. The manual said
> that it steered itself by following the white lines /so long as you kept
> at least one finger in contact with the steering wheel/. So far as I
> could make out, if you took your hands of the wheel completely, no-one
> was steering it. I didn't test the proposition very hard.

Sounds rather like a ouija board, with the strong possibility of
finishing up on the wrong side of one.

Mike Fleming

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Jul 12, 2022, 4:52:36 PMJul 12
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On 12/07/2022 13:12, Ahem A Rivet's Shot wrote:
>
> I strongly suspect Asimov was dead wrong and humanoid robots will
> only see specialised use.

You could do with one to walk the dog.

https://youtu.be/wlkCQXHEgjA

Richard Robinson

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Jul 12, 2022, 4:55:41 PMJul 12
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Bring back the anti-knock additives, eh ?

Brian Gaff

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Jul 13, 2022, 4:29:15 AMJul 13
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And the mistyped photon one.


I think they are cutting back onjokes making fun of some nationalities now
so I've not heard a Blenda type joke for some time.
Brian

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"Richard Robinson" <rich...@privacy.net> wrote in message
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> Brian Gaff said:
>> Thinking, yes, comprehending in this hot weather probably not.
>>
>> Alexa has some real groaners, I think the team at Amazon don't have
>> enough
>> to do.
>
> Is that where the 'Blenda' one came from ?

Brian Gaff

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Jul 13, 2022, 4:30:44 AMJul 13
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Not particularly but in the States there is a Male Alexa. He sounds like a
cowboy.
Brian

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"Richard Robinson" <rich...@privacy.net> wrote in message
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> Tease'n'Seize said:
>> Richard Robinson wrote:
>>> Brian Gaff said:
>>>
>>>> Alexa has some real groaners, I think the team at Amazon don't have
>>>> enough
>>>> to do.
>>>
>>> Is that where the 'Blenda' one came from ?
>>
>> She's too buy telling kids to shove pennies behind mains plugs
>
> Anybody fancy a pointless squabble about the gender identity of robots ?

Brian Gaff

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Jul 13, 2022, 4:31:59 AMJul 13
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Yes apparently some already are being tried in care homes.
Brian

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"Ahem A Rivet's Shot" <ste...@eircom.net> wrote in message
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> On Tue, 12 Jul 2022 06:15:49 -0500
> Richard Robinson <rich...@privacy.net> wrote:
>
>> Anybody fancy a pointless squabble about the gender identity of robots ?
>
> The first company to produce a general purpose household robot
> that does all the numerous household tasks such as cooking, cleaning,
> tidying, washing etc. might best avoid taking their designs from either
> the
> stereotypical 1950s housewife or the earlier domestic servant (especially
> Southern American variety).
>
> Indeed they should probably avoid any hint of gender or even human
> appearance.
>
> I strongly suspect Asimov was dead wrong and humanoid robots will
> only see specialised use.
>

Brian Gaff

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Jul 13, 2022, 4:33:08 AMJul 13
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That is called culture.
Brian

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Brian Gaff

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Jul 13, 2022, 4:35:19 AMJul 13
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Apparently a lot of money is going into developing sex bots, so that may not
surprise you at all, as it could be a very lucrative market, Can you imagine
one party sighting being unfaithful with a robot as grounds for divorce?
Brian

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Brian Gaff

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Jul 13, 2022, 4:39:07 AMJul 13
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There hardly seems much point in that case then?
The big issue is the unpredictability of the humans in the system, be they
drivers, cyclists or pedestrians.
The other issue is network coverage, ie no drop outs as much of the power
is not on vehicle its in the cloud. Imagine people in control will be able
to know where anyone is if they are in a vehicle.
Brian

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Brian Gaff

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Jul 13, 2022, 4:41:25 AMJul 13
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Surly, it can only detect you touching the wheel by capacitive means. In
that case, simply clip a long bit of wire to your ankle and the other end to
the wheel.
Brian

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Brian Gaff

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Jul 13, 2022, 4:42:33 AMJul 13
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No, I am for some reason reminded of the film Airplane and George.


Brian

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Brian Gaff

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Jul 13, 2022, 4:46:02 AMJul 13
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Benny Hill has been run recently on some of the freeview channels. They are
still funny, the audio ones particulrly, like the one with the squeaking
sofas.

Brian

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"Richard Robinson" <rich...@privacy.net> wrote in message
news:Vu-dnSCGrppi8VD_...@brightview.co.uk...
> John Williamson said:
>> On 12/07/2022 11:25, Richard Robinson wrote:
>>> Brian Gaff said:
>>>> Thinking, yes, comprehending in this hot weather probably not.
>>>>
>>>> Alexa has some real groaners, I think the team at Amazon don't have
>>>> enough
>>>> to do.
>>>
>>> Is that where the 'Blenda' one came from ?
>>>
>> The first time I heard that one, Benny Hill was the most popular comedy
>> show on TV.
>
> What a sheltered life I've led.
>
> I don't think I've ever met anyone of any nationality with a food
> processor on their head.

Brian Gaff

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Jul 13, 2022, 4:49:32 AMJul 13
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They have been trying to develop he robot Guide Dog for years, but the
battery life and the ability to react to unexpected situations is defeating
them.
By the way, a Whit horse went into a bar and asked for a pint, The barman
said, we don't get many horses in here let alone whit ones, did you know we
have a drink named after you?
What said the horse, you have a drink called Nigel?
Brian

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Richard Robinson

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Jul 13, 2022, 4:50:29 AMJul 13
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Brian Gaff said:
> And the mistyped photon one.

So much for artificially intelligent 'jokes', then.

>
> I think they are cutting back onjokes making fun of some nationalities now
> so I've not heard a Blenda type joke for some time.

What annoys me about that one is the assumption of arrogance; if you
want to know what to call someone, why not just ask them what they're
called ?

Richard Robinson

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Jul 13, 2022, 4:51:21 AMJul 13
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Brian Gaff said:
> That is called culture.

So is yeast.

Ahem A Rivet's Shot

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Jul 13, 2022, 5:30:02 AMJul 13
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On Wed, 13 Jul 2022 09:35:13 +0100
"Brian Gaff" <brian...@gmail.com> wrote:

> Apparently a lot of money is going into developing sex bots, so that may
> not surprise you at all, as it could be a very lucrative market, Can you
> imagine one party sighting being unfaithful with a robot as grounds for
> divorce?

It's nothing new. In 1980 (IIRC) a fiend of mine was married to the
jukebox in a King Street pub by an ordained (mail order) priest. The same
priest annulled the marriage a couple of weeks later on the grounds that
the jukebox had been unfaithful by accepting coins and playing tunes for
all comers.

Ahem A Rivet's Shot

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Jul 13, 2022, 6:00:02 AMJul 13
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On Wed, 13 Jul 2022 03:50:23 -0500
Richard Robinson <rich...@privacy.net> wrote:

> Brian Gaff said:

> > I think they are cutting back onjokes making fun of some nationalities
> > now so I've not heard a Blenda type joke for some time.
>
> What annoys me about that one is the assumption of arrogance; if you
> want to know what to call someone, why not just ask them what they're
> called ?

Well then you might learn that her name is Madame Cuisinart and she
has an interesting way with cordless hand blenders[2].

[2] Why does anyone want blended hands ?

John Williamson

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Jul 13, 2022, 6:01:53 AMJul 13
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Last time I watched a Benny Hill show, the jokes had not lasted well,
and were long past their use by dates.

Sexist and racists stereotypes, every single one of them.

I worked on a show with him once, and in person, he was not pleasant to
be near.

On 13/07/2022 09:45, Brian Gaff wrote:
> Benny Hill has been run recently on some of the freeview channels. They are
> still funny, the audio ones particulrly, like the one with the squeaking
> sofas.
>
> Brian
>


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Tciao for Now!

John.

Richard Robinson

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Jul 13, 2022, 6:18:58 AMJul 13
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Ahem A Rivet's Shot said:
> On Wed, 13 Jul 2022 03:50:23 -0500
> Richard Robinson <rich...@privacy.net> wrote:
>
>> Brian Gaff said:
>
>> > I think they are cutting back onjokes making fun of some nationalities
>> > now so I've not heard a Blenda type joke for some time.
>>
>> What annoys me about that one is the assumption of arrogance; if you
>> want to know what to call someone, why not just ask them what they're
>> called ?
>
> Well then you might learn that her name is Madame Cuisinart and she
> has an interesting way with cordless hand blenders[2].

She's the one that would know.

> [2] Why does anyone want blended hands ?

Because they're cordless ?

Richard Robinson

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Jul 13, 2022, 6:22:09 AMJul 13
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*snort*

Did he fit it with a piece of vinyl saying "I do" ?

Ahem A Rivet's Shot

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Jul 13, 2022, 7:30:07 AMJul 13
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On Wed, 13 Jul 2022 11:01:49 +0100
John Williamson <johnwil...@btinternet.com> wrote:

> Last time I watched a Benny Hill show, the jokes had not lasted well,
> and were long past their use by dates.

MTAAAW and that was when it was first aired - but TBF I've never
watched a whole show and never a repeat.

Ahem A Rivet's Shot

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Jul 13, 2022, 7:30:14 AMJul 13
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On Wed, 13 Jul 2022 05:22:02 -0500
Richard Robinson <rich...@privacy.net> wrote:

> Ahem A Rivet's Shot said:
> > On Wed, 13 Jul 2022 09:35:13 +0100
> > "Brian Gaff" <brian...@gmail.com> wrote:
> >
> >> Apparently a lot of money is going into developing sex bots, so that
> >> may not surprise you at all, as it could be a very lucrative market,
> >> Can you imagine one party sighting being unfaithful with a robot as
> >> grounds for divorce?
> >
> > It's nothing new. In 1980 (IIRC) a fiend of mine was married to
> > the jukebox in a King Street pub by an ordained (mail order) priest.
> > The same priest annulled the marriage a couple of weeks later on the
> > grounds that the jukebox had been unfaithful by accepting coins and
> > playing tunes for all comers.
>
> *snort*
>
> Did he fit it with a piece of vinyl saying "I do" ?

He ceremoniously inserted a coin.

Richard Robinson

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Jul 13, 2022, 7:44:11 AMJul 13
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Ahem A Rivet's Shot said:
> Richard Robinson <rich...@privacy.net> wrote:
>> Ahem A Rivet's Shot said:
>> > "Brian Gaff" <brian...@gmail.com> wrote:
>> >
>> >> Apparently a lot of money is going into developing sex bots, so that
>> >> may not surprise you at all, as it could be a very lucrative market,
>> >> Can you imagine one party sighting being unfaithful with a robot as
>> >> grounds for divorce?
>> >
>> > It's nothing new. In 1980 (IIRC) a fiend of mine was married to
>> > the jukebox in a King Street pub by an ordained (mail order) priest.
>> > The same priest annulled the marriage a couple of weeks later on the
>> > grounds that the jukebox had been unfaithful by accepting coins and
>> > playing tunes for all comers.
>>
>> *snort*
>>
>> Did he fit it with a piece of vinyl saying "I do" ?
>
> He ceremoniously inserted a coin.

Well, if the jukebox never promised to be faithful I think that was
jolly unfair of him.

maus

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Jul 13, 2022, 10:23:33 AMJul 13
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its the coin slot I blame. I am amused at the current Murdock-Hall
breakup, and its reverberations. Was it Jerry that Mick tried to divorce
by arguing that the ceremony was not legal?. A shy girl, reluctant to
have her personal [details] publicised.


--
grey...@mail.com
ten, twenty million, tops

maus

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Jul 13, 2022, 10:27:55 AMJul 13
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On 2022-07-13, John Williamson <johnwil...@btinternet.com> wrote:
> Last time I watched a Benny Hill show, the jokes had not lasted well,
> and were long past their use by dates.

They were all used in the old music halls. Lighten up.
>
> Sexist and racists stereotypes, every single one of them.

A man walks into A polish bar.
>
> I worked on a show with him once, and in person, he was not pleasant to
> be near.

Most comedians are not, spending their time terrified that that people
will not laugh.
>
> On 13/07/2022 09:45, Brian Gaff wrote:
>> Benny Hill has been run recently on some of the freeview channels. They are
>> still funny, the audio ones particulrly, like the one with the squeaking
>> sofas.
>>
>> Brian
>>
>
>


--

Brian Gaff

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Jul 13, 2022, 10:34:54 AMJul 13
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He could be quite grumpy it is true, but often the funny are quite troubled
people. Look at Charlie Drake.
If you got Bob Monkhouse on a bad day, you would get a lot of aggro.
Brian

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Brian Gaff

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Jul 13, 2022, 10:36:29 AMJul 13
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Strange, my machine is avoiding e today it seems.
Brian

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Brian Gaff

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Jul 13, 2022, 10:38:30 AMJul 13
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Mega groan.

I think what appeals to me are the siliness of these sort of jokes.

Brian

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Don Stockbauer

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Jul 13, 2022, 11:02:54 AMJul 13
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Two Popes walk into a bar.

maus

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Jul 13, 2022, 11:23:14 AMJul 13