Did they think he had a bicycle?
Paul C. Dickie
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/north_east/7401317.stm
"I couldn't understand why they did not pick up on it. How could someone
claim to have so many children but not be old enough to have them?"
--
< Paul >
Guy King
from "Paul C. Dickie" <p...@bozzie.demon.co.uk> contains these words:
> "I couldn't understand why they did not pick up on it. How could someone
> claim to have so many children but not be old enough to have them?"
I reckon I could father several hundred a night if I could get
sufficient turkey basters.
--
Skipweasel
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
Graeme Dods
news:3130303034323...@zetnet.co.uk:
> The message <7xtaLXOG...@bozzie.demon.co.uk>
> from "Paul C. Dickie" <p...@bozzie.demon.co.uk> contains these words:
>
>> "I couldn't understand why they did not pick up on it. How could
>> someone claim to have so many children but not be old enough to have
>> them?"
>
> I reckon I could father several hundred a night if I could get
> sufficient turkey basters.
>
I don't think the availability of turkey basters would be the only limiting
factor, or is there something extremely desirable about your genes that you
would have hundreds of willing receivers?
--
Graeme
®óñ© © ²°¹°-°²
wrote and included this (or some of this):
>The message <7xtaLXOG...@bozzie.demon.co.uk>
>from "Paul C. Dickie" <p...@bozzie.demon.co.uk> contains these words:
>
>> "I couldn't understand why they did not pick up on it. How could someone
>> claim to have so many children but not be old enough to have them?"
>
>I reckon I could father several hundred a night if I could get
>sufficient turkey basters.
But then you'd get RSI in the wrist (instead of RSI somewhere else)
--
®óñ© © ²°¹°-°²
Guy King
from Graeme Dods <graem...@gmail.com> contains these words:
> I don't think the availability of turkey basters would be the only limiting
> factor, or is there something extremely desirable about your genes that you
> would have hundreds of willing receivers?
That would be an "Eek, you men ickle" question.
Andy Burns
> How could someone
> claim to have so many children but not be old enough to have them?"
How old does a man need to be to have 36 children then? It'd be
feasible to achieve it from a standing start in ~9 months ...
Guy King
from Sena <"\"#\""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net> contains these words:
> It would be possible for a man to father 36 children a month assuming
> a couple of pairs of twins -
It would be possible for a man to father several thousand children a day
without great difficulty!
You're assuming just one shag a day - which seems rather pedestrian.
Graeme Dods
@zetnet.co.uk:
> The message <MPG.22967a667...@news.individual.net>
> from Sena <"\"#\""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net> contains these words:
>
>> It would be possible for a man to father 36 children a month assuming
>> a couple of pairs of twins -
>
> It would be possible for a man to father several thousand children a day
> without great difficulty!
>
> You're assuming just one shag a day - which seems rather pedestrian.
>
Shags are rarely pedestrian, they fly most of the way.
--
Graeme
Lister
wrote:
>The message <Xns9A9FEE6389CFBg...@203.59.27.131>
>from Graeme Dods <graem...@gmail.com> contains these words:
>
>> I don't think the availability of turkey basters would be the only limiting
>> factor, or is there something extremely desirable about your genes that you
>> would have hundreds of willing receivers?
>
>That would be an "Eek, you men ickle" question.
Feck!
Lister
wrote:
>The message <MPG.22967a667...@news.individual.net>
>from Sena <"\"#\""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net> contains these words:
>
>> It would be possible for a man to father 36 children a month assuming
>> a couple of pairs of twins -
>
>It would be possible for a man to father several thousand children a day
>without great difficulty!
>
>You're assuming just one shag a day - which seems rather pedestrian.
Some of us can do less than that, you know!
®óñ© © ²°¹°-°²
>The message <MPG.22967a667...@news.individual.net>
>from Sena <"\"#\""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net> contains these words:
>
>> It would be possible for a man to father 36 children a month assuming
>> a couple of pairs of twins -
>
>It would be possible for a man to father several thousand children a day
>without great difficulty!
>
>You're assuming just one shag a day - which seems rather pedestrian.
Sounds about right to me
--
®óñ© © ²°¹°-°²
Guy King
from ®óñ© © ²°¹°-°² <r...@spamall.com> contains these words:
> >You're assuming just one shag a day - which seems rather pedestrian.
> Sounds about right to me
Yebbut - I'm only in my mid forties!
®óñ© © ²°¹°-°²
wrote and included this (or some of this):
>The message <ja1p24pgd2fai7mkg...@4ax.com>
>from ®óñ© © ²°¹°-°² <r...@spamall.com> contains these words:
>
>> >You're assuming just one shag a day - which seems rather pedestrian.
>
>> Sounds about right to me
>
>Yebbut - I'm only in my mid forties!
That sounds like a pretty fair harem to me.
--
RonC
Most money is tainted.
'Taint yours and 'taint mine.
JonG
>> It would be possible for a man to father 36 children a month assuming
>> a couple of pairs of twins -
>
> It would be possible for a man to father several thousand children a day
> without great difficulty!
>
> You're assuming just one shag a day - which seems rather pedestrian.
[Caption: Birth, the Third World. Yorkshire.]
--
JonG
Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent
Salvor Hardin, Mayor of Terminus.
Rusty Hinge 2
from Lister <fa...@SPAMclara.net> contains these words:
Some of us just can't unforget...
--
Rusty
Direct reply to: horrid dot squeak snailything zetnet point co period uk
Separator in search of a sig
Rusty Hinge 2
from Sena <"\"#\""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net> contains these words:
> Andy Burns said...
> Depends how many mothers are involved innit. It would be possible for a
> man to father 36 children a month assuming a couple of pairs of twins -
> but he'd have to be very promiscuous and would therefore be unlikely to
> be the main provider for all his offspring.
Why twins? At 36 y.o.a. one orter be able to father three a day at least
- assuming 100% fertility.
Given the opportunity, I'd give it a go now, at my age, innit.
Rusty Hinge 2
from Graeme Dods <graem...@gmail.com> contains these words:
> Shags are rarely pedestrian, they fly most of the way.
Deep ends whether you are measuring that in a linear fashion or by time.
While tempus fugits, shags swim a lot.
Kate XXXXXX
> The message <Xns9AA0130484E4Cg...@203.59.27.131>
> from Graeme Dods <graem...@gmail.com> contains these words:
>
>> Shags are rarely pedestrian, they fly most of the way.
>
> Deep ends whether you are measuring that in a linear fashion or by time.
> While tempus fugits, shags swim a lot.
>
Laye eggs inside a paper bag.
The reason, as you see, no doubt,
Is to keep the lightning out...
But large brown bears do come with buns
And steal the bags to keep the crumbs...
--
Kate XXXXXX R.C.T.Q Madame Chef des Trolls
Lady Catherine, Wardrobe Mistress of the Chocolate Buttons
http://www.katedicey.co.uk
Click on Kate's Pages and explore!
Guy King
from Sena <"\"#\""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net> contains these words:
> Not being male, I'm not in a position to know innit. I know that I
> wouldn't want to have to do it more'n once a day, if that.
Amateur.
Rusty Hinge 2
from Guy King <guy....@zetnet.co.uk> contains these words:
> The message <MPG.2296b3b52...@news.individual.net>
> from Sena <"\"#\""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net> contains these words:
> > Not being male, I'm not in a position to know innit. I know that I
> > wouldn't want to have to do it more'n once a day, if that.
> Amateur.
Eau contrayre.
'AMAT'eur is hardly the worm.
Rusty Hinge 2
> > > It would be possible for a
> > > man to father 36 children a month assuming a couple of pairs of twins -
> > > but he'd have to be very promiscuous and would therefore be unlikely to
> > > be the main provider for all his offspring.
> >
> > Why twins? At 36 y.o.a. one orter be able to father three a day at least
> > - assuming 100% fertility.
> >
> Not being male, I'm not in a position to know innit. I know that I
> wouldn't want to have to do it more'n once a day, if that.
Hmmmm. I could tell you a tale...
Rusty Hinge 2
from Kate XXXXXX <ka...@diceyhome.free-online.co.uk> contains these words:
> Rusty Hinge 2 wrote:
> > The message <Xns9AA0130484E4Cg...@203.59.27.131>
> > from Graeme Dods <graem...@gmail.com> contains these words:
> >
> >> Shags are rarely pedestrian, they fly most of the way.
> >
> > Deep ends whether you are measuring that in a linear fashion or by time.
> > While tempus fugits, shags swim a lot.
> >
> The common cormorant or shag
> Laye eggs inside a paper bag.
> The reason, as you see, no doubt,
> Is to keep the lightning out...
> But large brown bears do come with buns
> And steal the bags to keep the crumbs...
And Rusty, practising with gnus
Blew those buns to tiny crumbs.
Steve O'Hara-Smith
> The message <MPG.22967a667...@news.individual.net>
> from Sena <"\"#\""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net> contains these words:
>
> > It would be possible for a man to father 36 children a month assuming
> > a couple of pairs of twins -
>
> It would be possible for a man to father several thousand children a day
> without great difficulty!
>
> You're assuming just one shag a day - which seems rather pedestrian.
Several thousand a day seems a little unlikely - even a thousand
leaves only 86.4 seconds per with no time for recovery (or anything else).
Nah not a hope, and no fun at all, best to keep it down to at most score or
so.
--
C:>WIN | Directable Mirror Arrays
The computer obeys and wins. | A better way to focus the sun
You lose and Bill collects. | licences available see
| http://www.sohara.org/
Guy King
from Sena <"\"#\""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net> contains these words:
> > Amateur.
> >
> Were I a professional I'd be one those wimmin your mother warned you
> about.
I distinctly unforget my mother warning me about loose cars and fast
women. She denies this strenuously, but given the sort of thing I was up
to in my late teens it wasn't far off the mark.
Graeme Dods
wrote:
> The message <Xns9AA0130484E4Cgraemedodsgmail...@203.59.27.131>
> from Graeme Dods <graemed...@gmail.com> contains these words:
>
> > Shags are rarely pedestrian, they fly most of the way.
>
> Deep ends whether you are measuring that in a linear fashion or by time.
> While tempus fugits, shags swim a lot.
Arbut, their submarine swimming is just flying, but in a denser
medium.
Graeme
Melanie Rimmer
> On Thu, 15 May 2008 18:10:36 +0100
> Guy King <guy....@zetnet.co.uk> wrote:
>
>> The message <MPG.22967a667...@news.individual.net>
>> from Sena <"\"#\""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net> contains these words:
>>
>>> It would be possible for a man to father 36 children a month assuming
>>> a couple of pairs of twins -
>> It would be possible for a man to father several thousand children a day
>> without great difficulty!
>>
>> You're assuming just one shag a day - which seems rather pedestrian.
>
> Several thousand a day seems a little unlikely - even a thousand
> leaves only 86.4 seconds per with no time for recovery (or anything else).
> Nah not a hope, and no fun at all, best to keep it down to at most score or
> so.
>
laboratory, or rather lots of them, and lots of cooperative women.
JonG
>>>> It would be possible for a man to father 36 children a month assuming
>>>> a couple of pairs of twins -
>>> It would be possible for a man to father several thousand children a day
>>> without great difficulty!
>>>
>>> You're assuming just one shag a day - which seems rather pedestrian.
>>
>> Several thousand a day seems a little unlikely - even a thousand
>> leaves only 86.4 seconds per with no time for recovery (or anything
>> else).
>> Nah not a hope, and no fun at all, best to keep it down to at most
>> score or
>> so.
>>
> Several thousand a day is possible, but you'd need a very well set-up
> laboratory, or rather lots of them, and lots of cooperative women.
Never underestimate the power of the Honoured Matres.
®óñ© © ²°¹°-°²
<ne...@dentrassi-nospamformetodayplease.lodge.org.uk> wrote and
included this (or some of this):
>Melanie Rimmer wrote:
>
>>>>> It would be possible for a man to father 36 children a month assuming
>>>>> a couple of pairs of twins -
>>>> It would be possible for a man to father several thousand children a day
>>>> without great difficulty!
>>>>
>>>> You're assuming just one shag a day - which seems rather pedestrian.
>>>
>>> Several thousand a day seems a little unlikely - even a thousand
>>> leaves only 86.4 seconds per with no time for recovery (or anything
>>> else).
>>> Nah not a hope, and no fun at all, best to keep it down to at most
>>> score or
>>> so.
>>>
>> Several thousand a day is possible, but you'd need a very well set-up
>> laboratory, or rather lots of them, and lots of cooperative women.
>
>Never underestimate the power of the Honoured Matres.
We're Duned, I tell you, Duned!
--
®óñ© © ²°¹°-°²
Dave Budd
\""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net says...
> >
> Depends how many mothers are involved innit. It would be possible for a
I could do it in 4 days, I reckon. Or could have before I saw the vet,
anyway. Given the opportunity, like.
--
Snob? Were I a snob, I wouldn't be talking to you.
Andy Burns
> In article <MPG.22967a667...@news.individual.net>, "\"#
> \""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net says...
>> Depends how many mothers are involved innit. It would be possible for a
>> man to father 36 children a month
>
> I could do it in 4 days, I reckon.
Excluding delivery.
Guy King
from Andy Burns <usenet.a...@adslpipe.co.uk> contains these words:
> > I could do it in 4 days, I reckon.
> Excluding delivery.
YMMV[1]
[1] Which I belatedly discovered does not stand for Lbh Znl Znfgheongr
Ivtbebhfyl.
Guy King
from Melanie Rimmer <m...@timelord.org.uk> contains these words:
> Several thousand a day is possible, but you'd need a very well set-up
> laboratory, or rather lots of them, and lots of cooperative women.
IRTA lavatory, with a consequent outburst of toilet humour.
Guy King
from JonG <ne...@dentrassi-nospamformetodayplease.lodge.org.uk> contains
these words:
> Never underestimate the power of the Honoured Matres.
Mattress?
Ah, yes..
Mistress. n. Something between a minister and a mattress.
Esra Sdrawkcab
Graeme Dods
news:3130303032303...@gruel.invalid.co.uk:
> The message <3130303034323...@zetnet.co.uk>
> from Guy King <guy....@zetnet.co.uk> contains these words:
>> The message <MPG.2296b3b52...@news.individual.net>
>> from Sena <"\"#\""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net> contains these words:
>
>> > Not being male, I'm not in a position to know innit. I know that I
>> > wouldn't want to have to do it more'n once a day, if that.
>
>> Amateur.
>
> Eau contrayre.
>
> 'AMAT'eur is hardly the worm.
>
As in - amo, amas, amat it again?
--
Graeme
Rusty Hinge 2
You have scored - er - you have scored a direct hit, sirrah.
Rusty Hinge 2
from Steve O'Hara-Smith <ste...@eircom.net> contains these words:
> On Thu, 15 May 2008 18:10:36 +0100
> Guy King <guy....@zetnet.co.uk> wrote:
> > The message <MPG.22967a667...@news.individual.net>
> > from Sena <"\"#\""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net> contains these words:
> >
> > > It would be possible for a man to father 36 children a month assuming
> > > a couple of pairs of twins -
> >
> > It would be possible for a man to father several thousand children a day
> > without great difficulty!
> >
> > You're assuming just one shag a day - which seems rather pedestrian.
> Several thousand a day seems a little unlikely - even a thousand
> leaves only 86.4 seconds per with no time for recovery (or anything else).
> Nah not a hope, and no fun at all, best to keep it down to at most score or
> so.
You've disremembered the turkey basters innit.
Steve O'Hara-Smith
Rusty Hinge 2 <rusty...@gruel.invalid.co.uk> wrote:
> The message <20080515221445....@eircom.net>
> from Steve O'Hara-Smith <ste...@eircom.net> contains these words:
> > On Thu, 15 May 2008 18:10:36 +0100
> > Guy King <guy....@zetnet.co.uk> wrote:
> > > The message <MPG.22967a667...@news.individual.net>
> > > from Sena <"\"#\""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net> contains these words:
> > >
> > > > It would be possible for a man to father 36 children a month
> > > > assuming a couple of pairs of twins -
> > >
> > > It would be possible for a man to father several thousand children a
> > > day without great difficulty!
> > >
> > > You're assuming just one shag a day - which seems rather pedestrian.
>
> > Several thousand a day seems a little unlikely - even a thousand
> > leaves only 86.4 seconds per with no time for recovery (or anything
> > else). Nah not a hope, and no fun at all, best to keep it down to at
> > most score or so.
>
> You've disremembered the turkey basters innit.
But that's much less fun - I'd rather attempt the thousand.
Guy King
from Steve O'Hara-Smith <ste...@eircom.net> contains these words:
> But that's much less fun - I'd rather attempt the thousand.
Go for the burn.
Austin Shackles
enlightened us thusly:
>Guy King <guy....@zetnet.co.uk> wrote in news:3130303034323739482C7C9C77
>@zetnet.co.uk:
>
>> The message <MPG.22967a667...@news.individual.net>
>> from Sena <"\"#\""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net> contains these words:
>>
>>> It would be possible for a man to father 36 children a month assuming
>>> a couple of pairs of twins -
>>
>> It would be possible for a man to father several thousand children a day
>> without great difficulty!
>>
>> You're assuming just one shag a day - which seems rather pedestrian.
>>
>
>Shags are rarely pedestrian, they fly most of the way.
I've just read that as pedestrians are rarely shags.
--
Austin Shackles. www.ddol-las.net my opinions are just that
Travel The Galaxy! Meet Fascinating Life Forms...
------------------------------------------------\
>> http://www.schlockmercenary.com/ << \ ...and Kill them.
a webcartoon by Howard Tayler; I like it, maybe you will too!
Austin Shackles
<ste...@eircom.net> enlightened us thusly:
>On Thu, 15 May 2008 18:10:36 +0100
>Guy King <guy....@zetnet.co.uk> wrote:
>
>> The message <MPG.22967a667...@news.individual.net>
>> from Sena <"\"#\""@cymoeddorguk.privacy.net> contains these words:
>>
>> > It would be possible for a man to father 36 children a month assuming
>> > a couple of pairs of twins -
>>
>> It would be possible for a man to father several thousand children a day
>> without great difficulty!
>>
>> You're assuming just one shag a day - which seems rather pedestrian.
>
> Several thousand a day seems a little unlikely - even a thousand
>leaves only 86.4 seconds per with no time for recovery (or anything else).
>Nah not a hope, and no fun at all, best to keep it down to at most score or
>so.
wotbut each emission contains many wrigglers (well, not in arGooey's case,
innit) and you only need one per ovum to produce the desired result.
However, I suspect the original report referred to virtual ABs, not real
ones.
Bit like a local farmer who's been had up for VAT fraud, seems that most of
the income on his accounts, when examined by the revenoo, was from VAT
refunds.
Andy Burns
> Bit like a local farmer who's been had up for VAT fraud, seems that most of
> the income on his accounts, when examined by the revenoo, was from VAT
> refunds.
Cowousel fraud?
Andy Burns
> they fly most of the way.
http://www.jet-man.com/prod/index_en.html
[flash required]
Skraedder
Yep. Who says penguins can't fly?
Skraedder
Guy King
from Austin Shackles <austinDITCHTHIS...@ddol-las.net>
contains these words:
> wotbut each emission contains many wrigglers (well, not in arGooey's case,
> innit) and you only need one per ovum to produce the desired result.
Ar, see, I didn't cnl my bill so I've been cut off.
Graeme Dods
news:b1ut24llr38dmoak1...@4ax.com:
> In uk.rec.sheds, (Skraedder) wrote in
> <Ht2dneSfgZHbMrPV...@pipex.net>::
> Darwin?
What did he know? There are world leaders who disprove his theory.
--
Graeme
Esra Sdrawkcab
> Guy King <guy....@zetnet.co.uk> wrote:
>
>> YMMV[1]
>>
>> [1] Which I belatedly discovered does not stand for Lbh Znl Znfgheongr
>> Ivtbebhfyl.
>
>
Kloff please.
Rusty Hinge 2
from Esra Sdrawkcab <ad...@127.0.0.1> contains these words:
> Kloff please.
That were quick.
Esra Sdrawkcab
> The message <%%vZj.8130$DZ6....@text.news.virginmedia.com>
> from Esra Sdrawkcab <ad...@127.0.0.1> contains these words:
>> Sn!pe wrote:
>>> Guy King <guy....@zetnet.co.uk> wrote:
>>>
>>>> YMMV[1]
>>>>
>>>> [1] Which I belatedly discovered does not stand for Lbh Znl Znfgheongr
>>>> Ivtbebhfyl.
>>> It's mine, I'll wash it as fast as I want.
>>>
>
>> Kloff please.
>
> That were quick.
>
Guy King
from Esra Sdrawkcab <ad...@127.0.0.1> contains these words:
> >>>> YMMV[1]
> >>>>
> >>>> [1] Which I belatedly discovered does not stand for Lbh Znl Znfgheongr
> >>>> Ivtbebhfyl.
> >>> It's mine, I'll wash it as fast as I want.
> >>>
> >
> >> Kloff please.
> >
> > That were quick.
> >
> They think it's all over - it is now.
Well, mop it up, there's a good boy.
Swa' sant-Nerf
> The message <BERZj.8604$DZ6....@text.news.virginmedia.com>
> from Esra Sdrawkcab <ad...@127.0.0.1> contains these words:
>
>>>>>> YMMV[1]
>>>>>>
>>>>>> [1] Which I belatedly discovered does not stand for Lbh Znl Znfgheongr
>>>>>> Ivtbebhfyl.
>>>>> It's mine, I'll wash it as fast as I want.
>>>>>
>>>> Kloff please.
>>> That were quick.
>>>
>> They think it's all over - it is now.
>
> Well, mop it up, there's a good boy.
>
--
BCNU
Guy King
from Swa' sant-Nerf <ad...@127.0.0.1> contains these words:
> >>>>>> YMMV[1]
> >>>>>>
> >>>>>> [1] Which I belatedly discovered does not stand for Lbh Znl
> >>>>>> Znfgheongr
> >>>>>> Ivtbebhfyl.
> >>>>> It's mine, I'll wash it as fast as I want.
> >>>>>
> >>>> Kloff please.
> >>> That were quick.
> >>>
> >> They think it's all over - it is now.
> >
> > Well, mop it up, there's a good boy.
> >
> But but it's the end of the fussball season isn't it?
Yes, you'll have to play with your balls by hand now.
Richard Bos
It is for you Limeys.
We Cloggies have to suffer through a few more months of even greater
madness.
Richard
Andy Burns
> Swa' sant-Nerf <ad...@127.0.0.1> wrote:
>
>> But but it's the end of the fussball season isn't it?
>
> It is for you Limeys.
>
> We Cloggies have to suffer through a few more months of even greater
> madness.
That's the cevpr you cnl for not allowing any of Oost-Europa to win in
the qualifiers innit?
Dave Larrington
Swa' sant-Nerf <ad...@127.0.0.1> tweaked the Babbage-Engine to tell us:
> But but it's the end of the fussball season isn't it?
If only... The BRITONS' En-ger-land are playing two internationals in the
next week.
--
Dave Larrington
<http://www.legslarry.beerdrinkers.co.uk>
Never trust a man with more than one moustache.
Richard Bos
Possibly, but why do _I_ have to cnl the cevpr when Marco van Basten has
been nasty to the Bulgarians and Albanians? It's not fair, I say.
At work, they've already put up the orange pennants. Argh and double
argh.
Richard