Where Was I? .... with two possible answers....

[Brian Smith]

Win a luxurious Cornish break for two worth £1,150 at Carbis Bay estate

The clue

My friend is vexed. "What dyke," he wails, "could possibly be more
important than my fixture?"

Again, I tell him of the light it shines on early medieval politics.
What’s more, it unlocks a whole day of activity. We’ll visit a National
Trust house and its grounds - through which the dyke runs. We’ll also
hunt for signs of an 18th-century benefactor’s rural retreat nearby.
His support helped establish a home for a distant group of scholars; a
new haven, if you will, for academic study. They named their
institution after him.

Friend, however, insists we head - as planned - to a sporting venue
nearly two miles north of the National Trust house. But I’ve changed my
mind. Racecourses like this are indeed rare - in whatever language you
name them. In fact, in terms of hosting international events it’s the
oldest of its kind in the world. But he’s already seen it many times on
television. My dyke, by contrast, has never played a key role in a
documentary series. So I’ve decided to wrest control of the itinerary
from him.

Then he gives up - or seems to, until we near the country house. "Stop
the car," he growls. "Give me the keys." I don’t. So we wrestle for
them. It’s not a Deadpool kind of fight. But it ends with him in the
car and me on the verge.

"I’m leaving you here, well away from other people," he says. "In case
you try to wreck someone else’s plans." Then he speeds off to the
fixture.

Oops. For me, it’s more of an own goal than a Hollywood ending.

The questions

1 What was the benefactor’s surname? YALE

2 In which town is the sporting venue? WREXHAM

The prize

The winner and guest will stay for two nights, B&B, in one of the Beach
Suites at Carbis Bay Estate in Cornwall. Set in the timber-fronted
Ocean Building, with both feet in the Carbis Bay sand, the Beach Suites
offer serene and spacious bedrooms as well as seafront balconies.
They’re part of an estate that includes the 36-room hotel, a range of
self-catering cottages, as well as C Bay Spa and five restaurants. Best
of all, the blue flag beach provides a sheltered setting for all kinds
of seaside fun - whether you’re swimming, paddleboarding or playing
beach cricket. For details visit carbisbayhotel.co.uk.

The prize also includes a three-course dinner for two, including a
bottle of house wine, at the fine-dining restaurant Walter’s on the
Beach. It must be taken before March 31, 2024, subject to availability
and excluding December 23 to January 2 and public holidays.

[Brian Smith]

Win a foodie break in the Lake District worth £1,050 at Askham Hall

The clue

No wonder my friend is lazing about. It’s a sunny afternoon. But now
I’m tired of waiting.

So I reveal that, 120 years ago, this wood was used for the disposal of
horse manure. Dirt was in its name.

That gets him upright, and brushing himself down. Today he looks
extraordinary. He’s dressed in polka dots and in stripes. But he wears
them well. Given our itinerary, I’m delighted.

Earlier we alighted at a station next door. It’s distinguished by its
art deco buildings and a statue that’s more than 80 years old. The
statue seems odd, until you remember how quickly the services from here
seemed to shoot southeastwards. It’s also a reminder of the medieval
hunters who once stalked a nearby forest.

Our theme, however, is more recent. We want to walk the streets that
nurtured some remarkable talent. First stop is the house, nearly half a
mile northeast of the statue, where two brothers (mother: Annie) grew
up. Even more remarkable is the site of the secondary modern school
they attended, a quarter of a mile north-northeast of their home. They
weren’t the only notable pupils - and we ponder the grass-roots
cultural boom of which they were all a part. It bent this country
beautifully out of shape.

Then it’s onto a 19th-century place of entertainment a mile east-
northeast of the house. These days its vast halls and courts feel a
little out of time. But I don’t mind - especially given the mesmerising
view from its hill. "How far do you think can we see?" Friend wonders.
"All the way back to 1963," I reply.

The questions

1. What is name of the station? EAST FINCHLEY UNDERGROUND STATION

2. What is the name of the place of entertainment? ALEXANDRA PALACE

The prize

The winner and guest will stay for two nights, B&B, in the best
available room at Askham Hall. Set in one of Cumbria’s prettiest
villages, Askham Hall is the former home of the 7th Earl of Lonsdale.
The building is idiosyncratic yet delightful - a defensive 14th-century
peel tower that morphed into a country mansion, peppered with
historical features and jugs of garden flowers.

Under the leadership of the chef Richard Swale, the hotel’s Michelin-
starred Allium restaurant has become a paragon of subtle, well-balanced
Cumbrian cooking that draws on produce from the kitchen garden and the
wider Lowther Estate. For details see askhamhall.co.uk.

The prize includes one tasting-menu dinner for two (excluding drinks)
at Allium and must be taken before September 1, 2024, subject to
availability, and excluding public holidays and December 21 to January
2.

[Brian Smith]

Win a short break in Bordeaux worth £2,500 with Kirker Holidays

The clue

"I don’t care who’s commemorated there," Companion hisses. "I’m not
going." I’m shocked. The parish church I want to see houses a tomb-like
memorial to a woman who began a royal dynasty. I thought my companion
would be fascinated. After all, some of the woman’s descendants tried
rewriting history to justify their power grabs - in more than one
country.

But today Companion has only one thought: to see a school founded in
the same town in the 16th century. A third of a mile northeast of the
church, it’s the alma mater of an actor (mother: Helen) who starred in
several seasons of Companion’s favourite TV series. An upcoming
anniversary has deepened his sense of urgency.

"I won’t go to that former car factory either," he announces. "There
isn’t time." Lord! Is he telepathic? It’s also 60 years since the
launch of an innovative vehicle built there - and the site is only two
miles west of the church. I was just about to suggest it.

So I give in. We go to the school, even though we can’t enter. "I bet
it’s much bigger inside than it looks outside," Companion observes.

Time for a final suggestion. In a village beyond the former factory’s
southern edge stands another memorial. It honours a freedom fighter who
died more than seven centuries ago. The village may have been his
birthplace.

"I don’t care who’s commemorated there," my companion hisses. For a
moment it’s like I’m in a time loop. But then an impish grin spreads
across his face. "Just kidding," he says. "Allons-y!"

The questions

1. What’s the first name of the actor? DAVID

2. What’s the name of the village? ELDERSLIE

The prize

The winner and guest will stay for three nights, B&B, at the Hôtel De
Sèze in Bordeaux, France. This elegant boutique hotel stands on the
18th-century Allées de Tourny, a few steps from the magnificent Grand
Théâtre opera house. Fast, frequent trams can whisk you to the Cité du
Vin for tastings and a cultural tour, or you can saunter the (almost)
traffic-free streets in search of chocolatiers, interesting museums and
delicious neighbourhood restaurants.

As part of a Kirker holiday the winner and guest will also enjoy the
services of a concierge who can book opera tickets and vineyard
excursions, as well as Kirker Guide Notes to the city’s sights and
food. For details see kirkerholidays.com.

The prize also includes return economy flights for two from London, as
well as private transfers. The prize must be booked by March 31, 2024,
for travel completed by December 20, 2024. It is offered subject to
availability and excluding public holidays, as well as the periods from
December 20 to January 2 and March 23 to April 7.

[Brian Smith]

Win a luxury London break worth £2,046 at the Hari in Belgravia

The clue

I should be chuffed. I’ve spent years trying to develop my friend’s
interest in the past. And now the effort is paying off. But his
enthusiasm is alarming me. "We have to leave this town," he bellows,
soon after we arrive. "It’s only a couple of centuries old. It’s not
historical enough!"

How ridiculous. After all, we’ve just visited the graveyard of a fine
Victorian church, to see the grave of a writer and her immediate
forebears (among others). Her work had a profound effect on
imaginations in the 19th and 20th centuries.

Meanwhile, 800ft west-northwest of the church there’s a plaque marking
the birthplace of a composer (father: Thomas) whose anthemic work still
echoes through our culture.

But Friend says that it’s all too recent and frogmarches me to the car.
Pity: I wanted to sample a 19th-century wellness trend on the town’s
long southern edge.

So we drive eastwards to a visitor centre five miles from the church,
just past a double ditch. Friend is in raptures. "I wonder whose feet
walked here?" he wonders. "You know, in ancient time?" These days it’s
a green and pleasant finger of land. But more than 2,000 years ago it
was a hive of trade and industry - with a mesmerising southern view.

"Now can I have a dip?" I ask.

"That’s exactly what I hoped you’d say," Friend tells me, producing two
wetsuits and two snorkels. "We can look for Iron Age ingots." And with
that he zips into his neoprene and drags me in.

What have I done? This is more than enthusiasm. I’ve created a monster.
The questions

1. To which saint is the church dedicated? ST PETER

2. What was the surname of the composer? PARRY

The prize

The winner and guest will stay for two nights, B&B, in a King Premium
room at the Hari in London. Opened in 2016 on Chesham Place in
Belgravia, the Hari is a five-star hotel with 85 rooms and 14 sumptuous
suites and has just undergone its first renovation. In the bedrooms
lush fabrics, cowhide rugs and wooden floors set a rich, earthy tone,
with works from the hotel’s art collection adding eye-catching detail.

Downstairs, cocktails are served at the Hari Bar, while a new chef,
Angelo Albera (formerly of Bocca di Lupo), has launched his first menu
at Il Pampero - think pepper-seared beef carpaccio, cep mushroom
risotto and Dorset crab linguine. The prize includes one four-course
dinner for two at Il Pampero (excluding drinks).

Beyond the front door London beckons, with Harvey Nichols, Hyde Park
and the Royal Academy of Arts all nearby. For details see thehari.com.

The prize must be taken before March 28, 2024, subject to availability
and excluding the period from December 29 to January 1

[Brian Smith]

Win a gourmet break for two worth £2,292 at Lucknam Park near Bath

The clue

There’s some confusion about the house number I seek. I thought it was
No 32. But there’s no sign of a plaque - and my friend isn’t helping.
He swears it’s No 39. Steps away, however, I find my answer, and the
memorial. Apparently the street numbers have changed.

"The hidden house! Sounds like a spy story," Friend giggles. I roll my
eyes and doff my cap. This was once home to a professor and his wife,
Hélène. One of their daughters, born here, had a stellar career, at
home and abroad.

It’s not the first memorial of the day. Earlier, nearly a mile west-
southwest of here, we saw a 16th-century half-timbered house, now a
museum. Friend was more interested in the oaks outside, but I wanted to
see its plaque - honouring an 18th-century preacher’s visit.

What next? Friend’s goal is to visit a sports stadium, while I seek the
remains of a 12th-century priory and the hall that followed it, a mile
east-northeast of the professor’s house. In the 1630s a brave woman
married into the family who owned the hall - and later did a doomed
king great service. So we separate and I head to the nearby country
park.

The park is huge, given the conurbation, even if it is bisected by the
start of a motorway. I’m less impressed by the priory ruins, but one
thing does catch my eye: my friend, hiding behind a thorny tree. “Are
you spying on me?” I ask.

"I told you I was going to see the hawthorns!" he claims. "If we’re
quick we can catch the Japanese maples next door too."

The questions

1. What’s the name of the half-timbered house? OAK HOUSE

2. What was the name of the priory? SANDWELL PRIORY

The prize

The winner and guest will stay for two nights, B&B, in a junior suite
at Lucknam Park. This Palladian mansion dates from 1720 and stands in
500 acres of listed parkland just six miles from Bath. There are 42
rooms, suites and parkland cottages - all individually designed - as
well as a state-of-the-art spa and the hotel’s equestrian centre, where
35 horses are available for guided rides through the grounds, alongside
bike trails, tennis courts and croquet.

In the main house, open fires crackle as the nights draw in - the
perfect place for an aperitif before dinner at the Michelin-starred
Restaurant Hywel Jones. One à la carte dinner for two (excluding
drinks) is included in the prize. For details see lucknampark.co.uk.

The prize must be taken between November 1, 2023, and March 24, 2024,
subject to availability and excluding December 1 to January 16 and
February 12 to 18.

[Brian Smith]

Win a gourmet break for two in Devon worth £1,344 at Gidleigh Park

The clue

My friend appears to be resting. "Why are you lying down?" I ask him.
"That lawn looks awfully wet."

Friend sighs and gets back up. "Shall we go?" he asks wearily. "Yes, of
course," I tell him and swing back downhill a second time. At which
point Friend grabs hold of my new ladder. I’ve just bought it and found
a clever way to carry it, balanced on my shoulder.

"Why are you doing that?" I ask. "So you don’t knock me over again," he
hisses.

Friend is very grumpy today. Our tour is of two adjacent riverside
towns, where one of my favourite actors (mother: Margaret) spent ten
happy years of his childhood. But Friend has enjoyed none of it. He
didn’t like the ruined castle and priory on the headland. He wasn’t
impressed by the light railway station’s restored Victorian glass roof,
500 metres west of the castle’s gatehouse. And he’s impatient with my
DIY shopping. I have plans for my garden. That’s why I’ve brought him
to this nearby park: to show him the hardy shrub I’ll use for my new
hedge - laurel.

The last stop is to pick up some fencing posts. We borrow a trolley and
wheel it down some stairs to a quayside car park.

"How long are these wretched posts?" Friend gasps as we gingerly
descend. Good question. I let go of the trolley and find the receipt.
Ah, yes: 2.4 metres.

When I look up Friend has gone. So have the posts.

"What a mess!" I gasp when I find both in a tangled heap at the bottom
of the stairs. "Indeed,|" he groans. "And you got me into it.|"

The questions

1. What was the actor’s original surname? JEFFERSON

2. What’s the name of the light railway station? TYNEMOUTH METRO
STATION

The prize

The winner and guest will stay for two nights, B&B, in a Deluxe Garden
View room at Gidleigh Park, a country-house hotel near Chagford in
Devon. Set in 107 acres on the edge of Dartmoor, this grand, half-
timbered property offers a sense of sanctuary, as well as exceptional
food. Its 24 bedrooms overlook the River Teign and are furnished with
fabrics and antiques sourced by the Brownsword family.

In the Michelin-starred restaurant, the head chef Chris Eden’s seasonal
menus are inventive yet refined. The wine cellar has more than 13,000
bottles. For more details see gidleigh.co.uk.

The prize includes one three-course dinner for two and a bottle of wine
chosen by the sommelier. It must be taken between November 1, 2023, and
April 30, 2024, subject to availability and excluding bank holidays, as
well December 24 to January 2, February 14 and March 29 to April 2.

The prize is not transferable. There is no cash alternative. Travel to
and from Gidleigh Park is not included. The prize excludes anything in
addition, and any extras must be paid for on departure by the prize
winner or guest.

[Brian Smith]

Win a luxury lakeside break on Windermere worth £1,360 at Storrs Hall

The clue

I thought that my friend would be a reluctant tourist in this historic
market town. How wrong I was.

"Que torre extraordinaria!" he exclaims as we climb a recent addition
to its skyline; then "Que castillo magnifico!" as we visit the former
home of a long and unusual line of lords. Their authority stretched far
beyond the temporal sphere - as their large chapel suggests.

But he’s most excited about one of the town’s new museums - not because
of its paintings from the 16th and 17th centuries; it’s the restaurant
he wants.

That’s when I realise my mistake. So far, we’ve barely scratched the
surface of this area’s history. The potentates may have put down roots
here 840 years ago, but just over a mile west of the restaurant there
is a Saxon church built about 510 years before that. What’s more, some
of the stones used to make it came from a Roman fort nearly a mile
north of us. The fort is home to an unusually well-preserved piece of
infrastructure; surely a warm and welcome refuge each winter.

But will Friend hurry up so that we can see them? Of course not. "Una
copa mas de albariño!" he insists as he considers another plate of
croquetas. By the time he’s finished the fort has closed.

So we head to the larger of the town’s two rivers to see a Victorian
viaduct instead. "Que dia!" Friend says as he balances woozily on the
riverbank. "What’s next?"

At which point I decide that it’s time for a little payback for the
lack of Roman archaeology. "Un baño," I tell him - and push him in.

The questions

1. What’s the name of the market town? BISHOP AUCKLAND

2. What’s the modern name of the Roman fort? BINCHESTER

The prize

The winner and guest will stay for two nights, B&B, in a Lakeside Suite
at Storrs Hall. Built in the 1790s, it occupies one of the loveliest
spots on Windermere and mixes spectacular lake views and Georgian
elegance with lush colour schemes and a liberal sprinkling of antiques.
Its chic and contemporary suites deepen the sense of sanctuary with
sliding walls of glass and woodland views.

For dinner there is a fine-dining restaurant and the brand-new Bistro,
looking south along the lake and serving French-inspired treats such as
fillet steak with garlic mayonnaise. For details see storrshall.com.

The prize includes one dinner for two (excluding drinks) at the Bistro.
It must be taken before November 1, 2024, subject to availability and

excluding public holidays, as well as the periods from December 20 to

January 2; March 28 to April 2; and July and August

[Brian Smith]

Win a luxury break at L’oscar in London worth £2,030

The clue

My friend is usually a pretty even-tempered guy. But here, where the
road forks, he’s in a combustible mood.

I’m determined to head north-northwest to see what is probably a late-
Elizabethan house (and a former care home). He wants to go straight to
our hotel, heading west-northwest towards a town famous for its
carpets.

"Your old banger won’t make it up there and back again," he growls. But
I won’t be diverted. I’ve been plotting this trip for weeks. En route
we’ll also stop at a museum, in a market town that’s now part of a
metropolitan borough.

The museum (opened in 2022) commemorates the industry on which the
town’s prosperity was built. Back then the country hereabouts lacked
for nothing when it came to raw materials and it boomed in all sorts of
ways, even if the smoke from its furnaces and chimneys blackened its
name.

Friend doesn’t care. In fact he’s being a right pain - shattering the
peace and quiet of the museum’s galleries with his complaints.

He’s dismissive of the cone-shaped building over the road too, and by
the time we reach the Elizabethan house, two and a half miles north-
northwest of the museum, he seems ready to blow. So I quickly explain
who fled there, nearly 420 years ago. Among them was their leader
(mother: Anne), who died the next day.

"And to mark the event I’ve brought a packet of black pearls tea," I
add. "We can sip it at the hotel, by the fire."

"Works for me," Friend says, his eyes at last sparkling with interest.

Phew. Explosion averted.

The questions

1. What is the name of the museum? STOURBRIDGE GLASS MUSEUM

2. What was the leader’s surname? CATESBY

The prize

The winner and guest will stay for two nights, B&B, in a Junior Suite
Grande at L’oscar, a sumptuous boutique hotel on Southampton Row in
central London. Set in the former Baptist Union of Great Britain
headquarters, this eye-catching neo-baroque building has been given a
makeover by the French designer Jacques Garcia in typically opulent
style, with rich imperial colours, glittering mirrors and intricately
patterned fabrics.

Upstairs there are 39 rooms and suites; downstairs, an onyx cocktail
bar stands beside L’oscar Restaurant, and next spring these will be
joined by La Muña, a Japanese-Peruvian restaurant in a former chapel.
For details see loscarlondon.com.

The prize includes one dinner for two (excluding drinks) and afternoon
tea. It must be taken before August 1, 2024, subject to availability
and excluding public holidays

[Brian Smith]

Win a luxurious London break for two worth Ł1,518 with the Beaumont,
Mayfair

The clue

I told my friend we were going near a city, not into it. But he’s not a
good listener. Now he’s broadcasting his disappointment far and wide.

"We’re only two miles from the home of one of the most influential
products of the past 130 years - and you want to see a duck pond?" he
splutters, through a mouthful of cheese and onion sandwich.

Well, yes and no. This village does have a pretty pond - home, until
quite recently, of a famous goose. A future Scottish king was married
here too. The site of his former property lies within a university
college. But my main interest is in those influential products. The
city nearby may have been their home. But it was in this village that a
mass-market use for them was first regularly tested under licence in
the UK.

Friend heaves a cheese-and-onion-laced sigh. Today we’re just not on
the same wavelength. So I suggest we scout out a country estate, less
than a mile south-southeast of the green. Many festivals and jamborees
have been held there, including a global gathering, 16 years ago, that
marked a centenary.

Soon Friend is on the crest of a wave, scoffing sandwiches and
imagining events the estate has witnessed - notably the night when a
special regiment’s commander tried to drive a jeep up the stairs of its
mansion. "What fun!" Friend cries.

And what fumes too. At which point I finally despair of Friend’s
sandwich breath. "Fancy some chewing gum? I suggest. "What kind?" he
asks. "Airwaves," I tell him.

The questions

1. What’s the name of the village? WRITTLE

2. What’s the name of the estate? HYLANDS ESTATE

The prize

The winner and guest will stay for two nights, B&B, in a superior room
at the Beaumont, Mayfair. This sumptuous five-star hotel sits on a
quiet square in Mayfair, London - a few minutes’ walk from Selfridges,
Hyde Park and the Royal Academy. Outside, a giant sculpture by Antony
Gormley overlooks the entrance. Inside, beyond the gleaming lobby,
you’ll find 72 rooms and suites, including Gormley’s ROOM, which
inhabits the inside of his sculpture. Throughout, the style is elegant
and art deco-flavoured and facilities include a white-marble spa and
hammam, Le Magritte cocktail bar and terrace, and Gatsby’s Room for
afternoon tea and evening champagne. One three-course dinner for two
(excluding drinks) at the hotel’s restaurant, the Colony Grill, is
included in the prize. For details, visit thebeaumont.com.

The prize must be taken before March 15, 2024, subject to availability
and excluding the period December 24-January 2