My name is Karen, I am in some trouble.

[KarenBr...@aol.com]

Look, I can hardly blame others for my misfortune, I have been a bitch
all my life. A bitch, and for the most part, unapologetic. I clearly am
not deserving of any 'helping hands' that may come my way. I have
always been a taker, rather than a giver; always put myself first
before anyone else; and always expected others to pick up any broken
pieces. The concepts of 'gratitude', 'kindness', and 'care' have
always been foreign to me.

So why am I posting? Because I need to. At long last I am reduced to
needing someone. I have now become the sort of person that I used to
take a delight in scorning. But does that mean I am beyond all
consideration? Let me tell you something about me.

I am 43 years old. I live in London. Over the past 25 years I have
lived a life that has alienated all of my family, broken two marriages
of my own and numerous others, screwed-up my (two) children, and
betrayed anyone who showed me even the slightest friendship or
consideration. And I may as well admit to you that I enjoyed every
second, I did it all gleefully and with some genuine relish. Oh yes, I
was a very, very bad girl.

In my late teens, I delighted in having affairs with the friends of my
father. It seemed so delightfully transgressive to have another woman's
man in my bed. And to laugh at their wives because they were so much
older and could not really compete. When I married, I loved to cheat on
my diligent, loving, hardworking husband. It was so much fun to sleep
with his various bosses, but even more fun to go with his juniors. And
I gloried in it all.

And when my marriages broke up, I repaid my female friends, the ones
who 'comforted' me through the proceedings by finding more and better
comfort with their drooling husbands. And in one case, her son too.

Yes, I have always been promiscuous, and proud of it. Always been a
bitch. Always been a selfish, lazyarsed cow. I admit it. I'm neither
ashamed or embarrassed. Why should I be? This has been my life, no
more, no less. I have been, and am, a middle-class slut. I can't get
away from that.

But now I am in trouble. Now I need help. Now its me coming with the
begging bowl. I am in a certain 'trouble' and need some help. Some
serious help. I don't want or need timewasters, grave-dancers or the
religious brigade. I need a solid opportunity to get out of my current
situation, and possibly redeem myself.

I have no right to ask this, and perhaps no right to receive anything.
But surely even I should be shown some mercy? Some favour. Is that too
much to ask?

Karen