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Parkside Cordless

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Arthur 51

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Sep 11, 2007, 3:19:10 AM9/11/07
to
Hia all.
I have a Parkside (LIDL) cordless drill that has 2 crap batteries.
I'm loathe to throw it in the bin even though I've now got
14.4v bosch.
Anyone know any sources for replacement batteries?
Then I could give it to someone.

Thanks.

Arthur

Doctor Drivel

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Sep 11, 2007, 3:33:35 AM9/11/07
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"Arthur 51" <tall...@googlemail.com> wrote in message
news:1189495150....@y42g2000hsy.googlegroups.com...

You could recell it with batteries from Maplin. Or go into Lidl and see
whop the agents are. I believe replacement batteries are available for
Parkside. With battery drills you get a set of batteries and free drill
thrown in. Probably not worth buying batteries, but give it a try.

Message has been deleted

Pete C

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Sep 11, 2007, 6:02:52 AM9/11/07
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Hi,

Why are they crap?

Do they quickly lose charge when left on the shelf?

So work fine after a full charge but not some days/weeks later.

cheers,
Pete.

Doctor Drivel

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Sep 11, 2007, 6:13:54 AM9/11/07
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<m...@privacy.net> wrote in message news:4F209131C3%brian...@lycos.co.uk...
> On 11 Sep,

> "Doctor Drivel" <Min...@nospam.com> wrote:
>
>> You could recell it with batteries from Maplin. Or go into Lidl and see
>> whop the agents are. I believe replacement batteries are available for
>> Parkside. With battery drills you get a set of batteries and free drill
>> thrown in. Probably not worth buying batteries, but give it a try.
>>
> I considered re-celling my bosch cordless. I found suitable cells more
> expensive than the complete packs. A new drill comes with batteries, and
> for
> cheaper models, can be cheaper than a new battery. I'll buy a new drill
> when
> I next need one.
>
> I bought a Bosch pmf 180 multi tool (the last one in Argos) yesterday. Ded
> gud it is too. What is the best source for new blades. It doesn't come
> with
> metal cutting ones as standard.

Look at the Medway Handymans posts.

Andy Hall

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Sep 11, 2007, 6:39:24 AM9/11/07
to
On 2007-09-11 11:02:52 +0100, Pete C <pete...@gmail.com> said:

> On Sep 11, 8:19 am, Arthur 51 <tally...@googlemail.com> wrote:
>> Hia all.
>> I have a Parkside (LIDL) cordless drill that has 2 crap batteries.
>> I'm loathe to throw it in the bin even though I've now got
>> 14.4v bosch.
>> Anyone know any sources for replacement batteries?
>> Then I could give it to someone.
>>
>> Thanks.
>>
>> Arthur
>
> Hi,
>
> Why are they crap?

Because they are cheap junk from Lidl.

Doctor Drivel

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Sep 11, 2007, 6:57:23 AM9/11/07
to

"Andy Hall" <an...@hall.nospam> wrote in message
news:46e6...@nt1.hall.gl...

Parkside are actually quite good tools.

Andy Hall

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Sep 11, 2007, 7:29:22 AM9/11/07
to

ROTFL.


Message has been deleted

Andy Hall

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Sep 11, 2007, 8:15:58 AM9/11/07
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On 2007-09-11 13:06:33 +0100, Arthur 51 <tall...@googlemail.com> said:

>
> As someone who owns a Power Devil hammer drill, Tooltec sander,
> Marksman plane, silverline biscuit cutter, Challenge jigsaw and
> Powercraft sander.
> Quality 'feel' from these tools goes like this for me.
>
> All of the above have a build quality feeling in the range 2 - 5 out
> of ten, compared to
> the recently acquired bosch cordless GSR14.4VE2.
> The parkside cordless from Lidl definitely comes top of the monkeys
> with a build
> quality feel more than 5 maybe 6.

In comparison with the Bosch?


> If I hadn't cooked the batteries on the bastard I wouldn't have
> thought about replacing it.

But you did, and now you're having to tit around with replacing them,
only to discover that doing so will cost more than the product. By
the time you've done all of that and accounted for the wasted time you
could have bought a decent product in the first place.


>
> Therefore, I feel; Up yours, Hall!
>
> :)

At least you figured out the buying the Bosch was the better idea.

Richard Perkin

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Sep 11, 2007, 8:36:03 AM9/11/07
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Arthur 51 <tall...@googlemail.com> wrote in
news:1189495150....@y42g2000hsy.googlegroups.com:

Coincidentally I'm in a similar position, but I've just bought the
Makita 18V combi + 3 batteries currently on offer from Screwfix...

The Lidl 'Parkside' brand tools (and other Lidl own-brand products)
are sourced from China (presumably) by Kompernass
Handelsgesellschaft. I'm not sure whether the company is just a
supplier to Lidl, or a subsidiary. Find their website here:
<http://www.kompernass.com>

UK service is provided by a firm in Bilston - find the contact
details via the Kompernass site. I keep meaning to contact them about
the cost of replacement batteries, but I've not got a round tuit. I'm
loath to throw the drill away as (despite what some may believe) it's
actually pretty good (proper gearbox, Rohm keyless chuck) but
certainly recelling the batteries is not ecomomic and indeed buying
new batteries may well not be economic...

As it is, I've had over 4 years of sterling use out of it and I'm
just getting to the end of the second house renovation project it's
been used on. I'm just about to start on a third, hence I can afford
a Makita :)

I generally subscribe to the adage 'buy cheap, buy twice' but on this
occasion went for 'buy cheap, see how much I use it' - and I used it
a lot and it just went on and on and on ... until the batteries began
to fail to hold charge. It has certainly repaid the purchase price.

Hope this helps

--
Richard Perkin
To email me, change the <AT> in the address below
richard.perkin<AT>myrealbox.com

It's is not, it isn't ain't, and it's it's, not its, if you mean it
is. If you don't, it's its. Then too, it's hers. It isn't her's.
It isn't our's either. It's ours, and likewise yours and theirs.
-- Oxford University Press, Edpress News

Arthur 51

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Sep 11, 2007, 9:00:06 AM9/11/07
to
On 11 Sep, 13:15, Andy Hall <an...@hall.nospam> wrote:

> On 2007-09-11 13:06:33 +0100, Arthur 51 <tally...@googlemail.com> said:
>
>
>
> > As someone who owns a Power Devil hammer drill, Tooltec sander,
> > Marksman plane, silverline biscuit cutter, Challenge jigsaw and
> > Powercraft sander.
> > Quality 'feel' from these tools goes like this for me.
>
> > All of the above have a build quality feeling in the range 2 - 5 out
> > of ten, compared to
> > the recently acquired bosch cordless GSR14.4VE2.
> > The parkside cordless from Lidl definitely comes top of the monkeys
> > with a build
> > quality feel more than 5 maybe 6.
>
> In comparison with the Bosch?

Well it definitely ain't my ability to get the members of Girls Aloud
throwing their underwear at me.

>
> > If I hadn't cooked the batteries on the bastard I wouldn't have
> > thought about replacing it.
>
> But you did, and now you're having to tit around with replacing them,
> only to discover that doing so will cost more than the product. By
> the time you've done all of that and accounted for the wasted time you
> could have bought a decent product in the first place.
>


>


> At least you figured out the buying the Bosch was the better idea.

My bosch is sexier than Girls Aloud...tis a pity that I am but a
knackered old Parkside
compared to Pierce Brosnan.

Arthur

Andy Hall

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Sep 11, 2007, 9:23:25 AM9/11/07
to
On 2007-09-11 14:00:06 +0100, Arthur 51 <tall...@googlemail.com> said:
>>
>>> All of the above have a build quality feeling in the range 2 - 5 out
>>> of ten, compared to
>>> the recently acquired bosch cordless GSR14.4VE2.
>>> The parkside cordless from Lidl definitely comes top of the monkeys
>>> with a build
>>> quality feel more than 5 maybe 6.
>>
>> In comparison with the Bosch?
>
> Well it definitely ain't my ability to get the members of Girls Aloud
> throwing their underwear at me

So is that it? Are you disappointed? :-)

>
>>
>>> If I hadn't cooked the batteries on the bastard I wouldn't have
>>> thought about replacing it.
>>
>> But you did, and now you're having to tit around with replacing them,
>> only to discover that doing so will cost more than the product. By
>> the time you've done all of that and accounted for the wasted time you
>> could have bought a decent product in the first place.
>>
>
>
>>
>> At least you figured out the buying the Bosch was the better idea.
>
> My bosch is sexier than Girls Aloud...tis a pity that I am but a
> knackered old Parkside
> compared to Pierce Brosnan.


Pierce Brosnan's older than me.

Anyway. He probably dyes his hair. Assuming it's real of course.

At least your Bosch isn't off of some cheap reality TV talent show.


manat...@hotmail.com

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Sep 11, 2007, 9:30:48 AM9/11/07
to
On Sep 11, 1:36 pm, Richard Perkin <f000nur...@hotmail.com> wrote:
> I generally subscribe to the adage 'buy cheap, buy twice' but on this
> occasion went for 'buy cheap, see how much I use it' - and I used it
> a lot and it just went on and on and on ... until the batteries began
> to fail to hold charge. It has certainly repaid the purchase price.
>
> Hope this helps

It won't. The rabid power tool bigots will have you for this ;-)

MBQ

John Rumm

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Sep 11, 2007, 9:40:27 AM9/11/07
to
Richard Perkin wrote:

> the cost of replacement batteries, but I've not got a round tuit. I'm
> loath to throw the drill away as (despite what some may believe) it's
> actually pretty good (proper gearbox, Rohm keyless chuck) but
> certainly recelling the batteries is not ecomomic and indeed buying
> new batteries may well not be economic...

Sometimes it can be worth recelling the packs even if it does cost more
than a new drill, since you will often get a significant improvement in
performance with them compared to a new set of OEM batteries.

So if the rest of the drill is not bad, and the battery charger is good
enough to not kill the batteries, you end up with something that is
better than a new one.


--
Cheers,

John.

/=================================================================\
| Internode Ltd - http://www.internode.co.uk |
|-----------------------------------------------------------------|
| John Rumm - john(at)internode(dot)co(dot)uk |
\=================================================================/

Pete C

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Sep 11, 2007, 11:58:11 AM9/11/07
to
On Sep 11, 1:36 pm, Richard Perkin <f000nur...@hotmail.com> wrote:
> I generally subscribe to the adage 'buy cheap, buy twice' but on this
> occasion went for 'buy cheap, see how much I use it' - and I used it
> a lot and it just went on and on and on ... until the batteries began
> to fail to hold charge.

Hi,

If you're OK taking the pack apart, google for 'nicad dendrites',
sometimes it's possible to 'zap' the nicads so they hold charge.

Otherwise I'd look for an identical pack on Ebay, sometimes they're
the same across a few brands.

Even if another pack has a different body, with a bit of luck the
cells will be in the same format and can be swapped over with a little
soldering.

To get the best pack life, always recharge them as soon as they begin
to fade.

cheers,
Pete.

Doctor Drivel

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Sep 11, 2007, 12:59:40 PM9/11/07
to

<manat...@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:1189517448.6...@o80g2000hse.googlegroups.com...

He will call in the Power Tool Style police.

Arthur2

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Sep 11, 2007, 2:16:10 PM9/11/07
to

"Doctor Drivel" <Min...@nospam.com> wrote in message
news:46e6452a$0$47129$892e...@authen.yellow.readfreenews.net...

What are the chances of taking the Rhom chuck off and putting it on the
Power Devil corded hammer drill?

Arthur


The Medway Handyman

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Sep 11, 2007, 2:57:12 PM9/11/07
to
m...@privacy.net wrote:
> On 11 Sep,
> "Doctor Drivel" <Min...@nospam.com> wrote:
>
>> You could recell it with batteries from Maplin. Or go into Lidl and
>> see whop the agents are. I believe replacement batteries are
>> available for Parkside. With battery drills you get a set of
>> batteries and free drill thrown in. Probably not worth buying
>> batteries, but give it a try.
>>
> I considered re-celling my bosch cordless. I found suitable cells more
> expensive than the complete packs. A new drill comes with batteries,
> and for cheaper models, can be cheaper than a new battery. I'll buy a
> new drill when I next need one.
>
> I bought a Bosch pmf 180 multi tool (the last one in Argos)
> yesterday. Ded gud it is too. What is the best source for new blades.
> It doesn't come with metal cutting ones as standard.

http://www.raidiy.com/

Their website is awful & their service is slow, but they have them in stock,
as do some B&Q's according to Trail Rat, but not my local one.

I agree the PMF180 is indeed ded gud.

--
Dave
The Medway Handyman
www.medwayhandyman.co.uk
01634 717930
07850 597257


Dave Plowman (News)

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Sep 11, 2007, 3:13:08 PM9/11/07
to
In article <1189495150....@y42g2000hsy.googlegroups.com>,

It will cost more to re-cell the batteries than to buy a new complete
drill from the likes of Lidl.

--
*I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it*

Dave Plowman da...@davenoise.co.uk London SW
To e-mail, change noise into sound.

Dave Plowman (News)

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Sep 11, 2007, 3:17:33 PM9/11/07
to
In article <46e6...@nt1.hall.gl>,

Andy Hall <an...@hall.nospam> wrote:
> >> Because they are cheap junk from Lidl.
> >
> > Parkside are actually quite good tools.

> ROTFL.

You're as bad as dribble as neither of you have probably any direct
experience of them.

Lots of Lidl tools are astonishing value for money. But I've no direct
experience of any of their power tools either.

--
*Procrastinate now

Doctor Drivel

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Sep 11, 2007, 3:32:04 PM9/11/07
to

"Dave Plowman (News)" <da...@davenoise.co.uk> wrote in message
news:4f20ccb...@davenoise.co.uk...

> In article <46e6...@nt1.hall.gl>,
> Andy Hall <an...@hall.nospam> wrote:
>> >> Because they are cheap junk from Lidl.
>> >
>> > Parkside are actually quite good tools.
>
>> ROTFL.
>
> You're as bad as dribble as neither of you have probably any direct
> experience of them.
>
> Lots of Lidl tools are astonishing value for money. But I've no direct
> experience of any of their power tools either.

Isn't this one just plain effing stupid!

Andy Hall

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Sep 11, 2007, 3:46:36 PM9/11/07
to
On 2007-09-11 20:17:33 +0100, "Dave Plowman (News)"
<da...@davenoise.co.uk> said:

> In article <46e6...@nt1.hall.gl>,
> Andy Hall <an...@hall.nospam> wrote:
>>>> Because they are cheap junk from Lidl.
>>>
>>> Parkside are actually quite good tools.
>
>> ROTFL.
>
> You're as bad as dribble as neither of you have probably any direct
> experience of them.
>
> Lots of Lidl tools are astonishing value for money. But I've no direct
> experience of any of their power tools either.

Actually a neighbour has a couple of these and I have used them. They
aren't great.


Dave Plowman (News)

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Sep 11, 2007, 6:12:29 PM9/11/07
to
In article <46e6ede9$0$47154$892e...@authen.yellow.readfreenews.net>,

Doctor Drivel <Min...@nospam.com> wrote:
> > You're as bad as dribble as neither of you have probably any direct
> > experience of them.
> >
> > Lots of Lidl tools are astonishing value for money. But I've no direct
> > experience of any of their power tools either.

> Isn't this one just plain effing stupid!

Not as stupid as the likes of you who offer advice on tools you've plainly
only ever seen in a shop, and never used. At least Andy actually has the
tools he recommends.

--
*I don't work here. I'm a consultant

Doctor Drivel

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Sep 12, 2007, 3:24:20 AM9/12/07
to

"Dave Plowman (News)" <da...@davenoise.co.uk> wrote in message
news:4f20dcc...@davenoise.co.uk...

> In article <46e6ede9$0$47154$892e...@authen.yellow.readfreenews.net>,
> Doctor Drivel <Min...@nospam.com> wrote:
>> > You're as bad as dribble as neither of you have probably any direct
>> > experience of them.
>> >
>> > Lots of Lidl tools are astonishing value for money. But I've no direct
>> > experience of any of their power tools either.
>
>> Isn't this one just plain effing stupid!
>
> Not

See. He is just plain effing stupid!

dixie

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Jul 22, 2010, 12:09:26 PM7/22/10
to
Hi,
Can you please tell me is the chuck 10mm or 13mm?
Thanks

url:http://myreader.co.uk/msg/1391112980.aspx

mike

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Jul 22, 2010, 1:03:38 PM7/22/10
to

You can download the manual with the specs here:

http://kompernass.de/pages/index.php?page=1,3,1,1&brand=parkside&lang=en

ray...@gmail.com

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May 29, 2016, 11:31:58 AM5/29/16
to
Hi I am interested in the battery charger if you want to sell £ 15 email is ray...@gmail.com

Phil L

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May 29, 2016, 12:31:34 PM5/29/16
to
ray...@gmail.com wrote:
> Hi I am interested in the battery charger if you want to sell Ł 15
> email is ray...@gmail.com

Do you really think that after nine years, he's still got a charger for a
drill that doesn't work? - take a look at the date of the post you are
replying to - it's from 2007


Brian Gaff

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May 30, 2016, 3:53:18 AM5/30/16
to
I'd imagine this is once again the result of crap interfaces for newsgroups
via the web myself. it happens far too often to be merely human error.
Brian

--
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"Phil L" <neverc...@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:CPE2z.1944318$GG.15...@fx36.am4...

stringfel...@gmail.com

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Mar 9, 2017, 7:34:09 AM3/9/17
to
I am charging the battery both ref &hreen lights are on what is the problem please?

John Rumm

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Mar 9, 2017, 7:44:22 AM3/9/17
to
On 09/03/2017 12:34, stringfel...@gmail.com wrote:

> I am charging the battery both ref &hreen lights are on what is the problem please?

What is written on the charger beside the red and green lights?

Tim+

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Mar 9, 2017, 10:47:36 AM3/9/17
to
John Rumm <see.my.s...@nowhere.null> wrote:
> On 09/03/2017 12:34, stringfel...@gmail.com wrote:
>
>> I am charging the battery both ref &hreen lights are on what is the problem please?
>
> What is written on the charger beside the red and green lights?
>
>

*Usually*, red indicates charging, green indicates fully charged. Charger
may be fubar. Have you tried unplugging the charger and plugging it back in
(just in case its charging management chip has got fuddled)?

Tim

--
Please don't feed the trolls

Chris Green

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Mar 9, 2017, 11:03:04 AM3/9/17
to
On some the red light simply indicates that it's turned on (i.e. power
connected) and the green light is the charge indicator.

For some reason there seems to be no agreement as to whether flashing
= charging and on = full or vice versa between different
manufacturers.

--
Chris Green
·

Dave Plowman (News)

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Mar 9, 2017, 11:43:03 AM3/9/17
to
In article <61a137fa-416c-4d5a...@googlegroups.com>,
<stringfel...@gmail.com> wrote:
> I am charging the battery both ref &hreen lights are on what is the
> problem please?

Trouble is Parkside is a Lidl brand name for tools which come from a
variety of makers. And they may well have different protocols for what the
lights mean. If it's not marked on the charger itself you'll need to look
at the instruction book. Or give the model type and number here.

--
*Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them *

Alan Dawes

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Mar 9, 2017, 12:28:14 PM3/9/17
to
In article <o9rt9d$9us$1...@dont-email.me>,
Could the battery have been fully charged before you tried to recharge it?
The instructions with my (8 year old) Lidl Parkside Cordless drill says
that this may result in a fault condition. Unplug the charger from the
wall, remove the battery, use it in the drill to discharge it a bit and
then after at least 15 minutes, put it back in the charger and turn on. If
all is well the red light will be on whilst charging and then green when
fully charged.

Alan

--
alan....@argonet.co.uk
alan....@riscos.org
Using an ARMX6

Harry Bloomfield

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Mar 9, 2017, 12:34:17 PM3/9/17
to
Chris Green pretended :
> On some the red light simply indicates that it's turned on (i.e. power
> connected) and the green light is the charge indicator.
>
> For some reason there seems to be no agreement as to whether flashing
> = charging and on = full or vice versa between different
> manufacturers.

My Makita has red = got power/charging, green solid = fully charged,
green flashing = faulty battery.

Chris Green

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Mar 9, 2017, 2:03:05 PM3/9/17
to
Goodness, yet another variation that I've not seen before! All of
mine at least only use a single green LED to indicate charge, they
just vary one the flashing/not-flashing meaning.

--
Chris Green
·

thea...@aol.com

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May 8, 2017, 5:54:55 AM5/8/17
to
Go on web look up parkside spares there good cannot fault

mal...@gatewaybusinessservices.uk

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Jul 27, 2017, 3:34:07 PM7/27/17
to
On Tuesday, September 11, 2007 at 8:19:10 AM UTC+1, Arthur 51 wrote:
> Hia all.
> I have a Parkside (LIDL) cordless drill that has 2 crap batteries.
> I'm loathe to throw it in the bin even though I've now got
> 14.4v bosch.
> Anyone know any sources for replacement batteries?
> Then I could give it to someone.
>
> Thanks.
>
> Arthur

I bought three Parkside tools ... drill, jigsaw, circular saw and I have no complaints about the tools themselves but one battery went dud after about 18 months so I bought a replacement from Kompernass.

What bothers me is that today the other two batteries have both failed ON THE SAME DAY. Both say date of manufacture Oct 2014 just under three years ago. The three-year warranty doesn't cover batteries but I am wondering if they fit a chip to make them fail. Anyone else had a similar experience?

Brian Gaff

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Jul 28, 2017, 2:39:29 AM7/28/17
to
Well maybe they have changed since 2007....
Brian

--
----- -
This newsgroup posting comes to you directly from...
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bri...@blueyonder.co.uk
Blind user, so no pictures please!
<mal...@gatewaybusinessservices.uk> wrote in message
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coast...@gmail.com

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Jan 1, 2018, 1:54:05 PM1/1/18
to
On Tuesday, 11 September 2007 08:19:10 UTC+1, Arthur 51 wrote:
> Hia all.
> I have a Parkside (LIDL) cordless drill that has 2 crap batteries.
> I'm loathe to throw it in the bin even though I've now got
> 14.4v bosch.
> Anyone know any sources for replacement batteries?
> Then I could give it to someone.
>
> Thanks.
>
> Arthur

Arther....If the batteries are marked PAP14.4 (on the bottom) I'd want to buy it all from you assuming it has the charger. Some dick-head stole several of my power tools including the charger for my LIDL (parkside) 14.4 volt dril so I have a good drill and a flat battery. please respond to g...@coastelect.com

David

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Jan 1, 2018, 2:01:46 PM1/1/18
to
Perhaps in the intervening 10 years or so he has thrown or given it?

Still, hope springs eternal......


--
AMD FX-6300 in GA-990X-Gaming SLI-CF running Windows 7 Pro x64

---
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Brian Gaff

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Jan 2, 2018, 3:11:25 AM1/2/18
to
After 10 years I rather suspect its unlikely to still even be working
batteries or not!

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<coast...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:21c2a0b8-573a-4492...@googlegroups.com...

josephin...@gmail.com

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Feb 19, 2018, 8:48:16 AM2/19/18
to
On Tuesday, September 11, 2007 at 9:19:10 AM UTC+2, Arthur 51 wrote:
> Hia all.
> I have a Parkside (LIDL) cordless drill that has 2 crap batteries.
> I'm loathe to throw it in the bin even though I've now got
> 14.4v bosch.
> Anyone know any sources for replacement batteries?
> Then I could give it to someone.
>
> Thanks.
>
> Arthur

I have about six or seven park side tools which I find as very reliable. But when it comes to my cordless drill which I must say I really had a good number of years with good result and reliable too. My disappointment is, while the tool is still in very good working order, the batteries no longer keep their power more than 30 seconds and can`t find a replacement. Any ideas.

Dave Plowman (News)

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Feb 19, 2018, 9:08:32 AM2/19/18
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In article <23a82e28-e676-4a89...@googlegroups.com>,
If your batteries are as old as the post you're replying to - some 10
years - you've done well.

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*When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded *

Rob Morley

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Feb 19, 2018, 6:01:54 PM2/19/18
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On Mon, 19 Feb 2018 05:48:13 -0800 (PST)
josephin...@gmail.com wrote:

> I have about six or seven park side tools which I find as very
> reliable. But when it comes to my cordless drill which I must say I
> really had a good number of years with good result and reliable too.
> My disappointment is, while the tool is still in very good working
> order, the batteries no longer keep their power more than 30 seconds
> and can`t find a replacement. Any ideas.

Dismantle the battery to see what sort of generic cells it contains,
and replace them.

Dave Plowman (News)

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Feb 19, 2018, 6:49:06 PM2/19/18
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In article <20180219230149.0c400dbb@Mars>,
There are companies who will re-cell batteries. But not sure just how good
the new cells are. And likely to cost just as much as a brand new cordless
drill from Lidl. Sadly.

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*We are born naked, wet, and hungry. Then things get worse.
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