My Lai Video Question #3

[Hannah Baran (Louisa HS)]

Why do you believe Varnado Simpson keeps a photo album of his
victims? What do he, the survivors of the massacre, Tim O'Brien (the
author), and the characters in TTTC have in common?

(Answer one of the three My Lai video questions.)

[Maeha Karlow]

That is a very good question MrrsVarnado Simpson keeps a photo album
of his victims because he (1) feels it is his life, past, present and
future; (2) he needs a vivid reminder of what he did, and why he
thinks the way he does; (3) Simpson would see it without the photos,
as if they are his proof. Simpson says it was everything, "the way
[he] [is], what made [him]." For him it represents the most important
aspects of his life. When he says that it "made" him, he means from
that day forward it would affect how he viewed himself-a killer.
Simpson says that he could not love anymore. His actions made him
"evil" and "destructive." Vietnam made him want to "kill" and "hurt."
It changed him forever. Simpson faces mental problems from My Lai,
known as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. He sees forever those he
killed in his nightmares, everytime he closes his eyes. The photos
only prove that his visions are real. It comforts him to know that it
really did happen; he really murdered them; it is not just in his
head. The twenty-five people he killed are engraved in his memory. It
makes him want to kill himself, because he does not know his purpose
in life. He is ashamed, sorry, and guilty, "but [he] did it... it
happens... its war... its killing." His final words were that's why
"we don't need another one."

The survivors, O'Brien, and the characters in TTTC all must live with
memories of death. Just like Simpson, these people are affected
strongly by what they have seen. Unlike Simpson, though, they will
mourn the death of their loved ones, where he mourns his act of
murder. For the rest of their lives they will replay their friends and
family being slaughtered. They will feel the same pain as they watched
the ones who were closest to them die until they die. Most likely,
they will all wish they could have done something to stop the horrors
of war. They will feel guilt and sorrow and pain.

On Jan 26, 8:31 pm, "Hannah Baran (Louisa HS)"

[Rolph Recto]

You are spot on Maeha - Varnado Simpson kept photographs of the people he killed because he wanted - needed - to remember. While one would expect Simpson to bury his past and not actively hold evidence of the atrocities that he had committed, he admitted that it was impossible for him to forget - even without the photographs, he was still haunted by nightmares and involuntary memories of the massacre. In fact, he was so haunted by the massacre that it became the crux of his identity. Like you said, Maeha, Simpson distanced himself to love because he killed so many people. Only someone monstrous is capable of killing in cold-blood - and how can a monster love, or be loved?

Simpson's enormous guilt defined him and consumed him. When his son was killed, he attributed the death as punishment for his sins - he likened his dead son's face to one of the children he killed in My Lai. Guilt explains why he kept the photographs - because oblivion was impossible, Simpson had to carry the weight of his memories whether he liked it or not. To him, those photographs were the crosses he bore as a sort of penance for his guilt.

And yes too, Maeha: Varnado Simpson, the survivors of the My Lai massacre, Tim O'Brien, and the characters of TTTC are all united by the gift and curse of memory. It is a gift because it gives us our identity - what is human experience but the collection of memories? It is a curse because often times one would rather forget than to relive over and over in one's mind a terrible experience. Varnado Simpson would rather forget that he massacred innocent people; the survivors of My Lai would rather forget the brutal deaths of their loved ones; Tim O'Brien and the soldiers in TTTC would rather forget the jungle of death that they wandered around. Memory is but another one of "the things they carried."

--
Rolph Recto 

Louisa County High School

[Madison Stanley]

I agree completely with Maeha and Rolph that Varnado Simpson kept the
photographs and the memories of the war in his album because he
convinced himself that he needed to remember what took place during
that massacre. It is obvious after watching him soon after the war,
and then seeing him again years later, that his brain has reprogrammed
itself to believe that he is not only a monstrous human being, but
that he must beat himself up about what he did everyday until he dies
in order to punish himself for his actions. The idea of him being
responsible for the loss of 21 lives, and the idea that he killed
innocent people, had manifested in his brain to the point where it was
all he could think about, and it became an obsession. Simpson’s photo
album is like the whip that some monks use to punish themselves for
God. He wants to feel the pain because he believes that he must suffer
for what he had done. He doesn’t want to ever forget the exact faces
of those he murdered so that they will haunt him. Simpson has accepted
that everyday he is alive, he needs to think about his past, which he
considers his present and future.
I agree in part with Maeha and Rolph about what Simpson, Tim O’Brien,
the survivors of the massacre and the characters in TTTC have in
common. Yes, as Maeha said, they experience death, and as Rolph said,
they must live with the memories. However, they are bound by a larger,
more significant experience. They characters are all joined together
by the horrors of war, and those experiences they gain, that a human
who has not gone through war can never understand. All humans have
memories, but it is not just the memories that are significant, it is
what they remember: war. War changes men, steals lives and haunts
people until the day they die. It is a traumatic event that those of
us who have only heard of it, only read about it, can never begin to
comprehend. What happens on the battlefield, stays on the battlefield…
and with those who were there.

[Maeha Karlow]

Beautifully said Madison and Rolph. I really love your view points.

[Lindsey]

Maeha, Rolph and Madison, you all are absolutely correct with your
thoughts but it's like Simpson needed this photo album of all the bad
things he'd done in Vietnam to keep the truths and the lies straight
in his head. Obviously, he had some serious issues because of the war
considering his nervous ticks and his multiple hospitalizations from
attempts at suicide so he needs some sort of physical proof that the
actions actually happened and it's not just his insanity. As Maeha
said, he states in the movie that Vietnam is his past, present, and
future so it takes over his whole life and he needs a record of it.
All the mentioned characters have experienced war at its worst. They
all have terrible experiences and have to live with the pain and
memories and hard times they went through. The others that were
killed in Vietnam are out of misery, which I believe could have been
better than what these people have to endure every day of their
lives. The killings and guilt are present in the minds of these
veterans everyday and even though they all deal with it in their own
way, they still share the experience. All the characters walk away
emotionally and sometimes physically damaged and nothing can save them
from the memories that haunt their every day lives.

On Jan 27, 3:48 pm, Maeha Karlow <karlo...@gtest.lcps.k12.va.us>
wrote:

[Emily Barnes]

I like the way Maeha described his reasoning. Those photos do make his
nightmares seem real, and that they are not just phantom demons
tormenting him. But I think that we could take this a step furthur.
These photos show not only what he has been through, but also everyone
who went to Vietnam. They tie in with the horror that every Vietnam
vet had to go through, in someway or another.

> > > > Louisa County High School- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -

[Nicole]

Varnado Simpson was haunted by the things that he and others did while
fulfilling their duties. He went and killed many innocent women,
children, and men, who did not even know why this was happening or
what they did to deserve it. He kept the scrap book because it
reminded him of what he did and he said through out the interview,
"This is my life!" Many men who were there cried or and no sensation
at all. Varnado was on many anti-depressants and had a nervous twitch.
The massacre effected his mental stability also. Tim O'Brien and the
others were haunted by what they saw and did. They were changed
emotionally, mentally, and even physically when it came to what
happened in the war. SOme of them couldn't really talk about it or get
it from their minds.

On Jan 26, 8:31 pm, "Hannah Baran (Louisa HS)"
<hannah.ka...@gmail.com> wrote: