Relationship with an Atheist.

[Cryingontheinside]

Hi Everyone, I'm evidently new here.
I have been together with my boyfriend of just under 3.5 years. We do
live together. Approximately a year into our relationship, my
boyfriend decided he was an atheist.

I am a Lutheran woman. I do not go to church regularly but I am close
to God. Religion is a very private thing for me, something I've
always kept to myself (even though God wants us to proclaim his Son as
the saviour of our sins).

I very much acknowledge that I am not perfect, and that I am sinful.

Before I start, I'd very much like to say that the answer I'm not
looking for is "it'll never work." I'm here for support, and maybe
some insight. I have read several other posts regarding two different
religions in a relationship (and/or marriage), and found a very
positive response; hence my posting here.

Let me begin by saying that I am a very sensitive person. When his
atheism became strong, I was offended, and felt like he was targeting
me. Soon after a few discussions with me in tears, he and I came to
an agreement that he was not disrespecting me, and that this is
obviously a sensitive subject for me, and so we decided to 'not talk'
about it.

Since, we have had few conversations about it, some with me in tears,
some not.

He very much respects and loves me. He is actually almost everything
I've always wanted in a Man; Kind, loving, thoughtful, generous,
funny...just everything for me. To me, he acts Christian - kind,
loving, supportive, wonderful. Just the fact that he doesn't believe
is the only thing separating him from Christ.

Unfortunately, when we do discuss religion, he is VERY hard headed.
It's not that he doesn't listen; but he's researched practically
everything to go against everything the Bible and religious teachings
say.

In the past month or so, I'm becoming more and more and more
distraught at the fact that he's not even spirtual.

I pray for him every night, that God will come to him; or that God
will come to me and I can work it into his life very subtly.

He does not force atheism upon me; I do not force Christianity upon
him. He does not try to draw me away from the Lord. We are very
mutually agreed on this and we love and respect each other in this
regard. He does not mind if I go to church; he does not make comments
against or for it. We are very neutral.

Right now, as I mentioned, I'm kind of on a spirtual journey. I don't
know what to do. Even though he is not Athiestic towards me, the
impression in my life is there. I know that our faith isn't really
'blind', but, science can not prove our feelings as it has done for
many things opposing the bible and what we believe in.

He will not talk to pastors/teachers. I know this as I have suggested
it before. I have suggested some Christian literature to him such as
the Lee Strobel book.

I'm torn. I'm crying on the inside, because I don't know what to do.
I want to believe, but I also want to be in harmony with my
boyfriend. I don't know if my doubts in my faith are coming because
of my need to please, or if I'm really having doubts because I'm
having doubts.

Out of everything, I don't want you to think that i do everything for
him; our relationship is very fair and even - I would have it no other
way. This is the ONLY subject we have issues with. Money is easy to
talk about, we agree... everything. Just this.

I don't even know what to think. I bet half of this didn't even make
sense, since it's jumping around so much. I just can't put my thoughts
straight.

Any insight would be appreciated. Probing questions, even. Anything.
Just don't tell me to break up with him because it won't work. I'm
not here for that. We promised ourselves to one another, and to me;
that's good through trials and problems; "in sickness and in health"

Thanks,
Crying

[TILM]

Dear Crying,
I would like to write you a longer letter, but right now I just
don't have the time. I will write more, though, next week.
First of all, I want you to know that my heart goes out to you.
I hope you can feel the warm hug I'm sending with this note.
Secondly, for right now, I'd encourage you to go to church and
find a Bible study group to belong to. Continue to read your Bible
and spend time in prayer, not only crying out to God, but listening to
His voice. It is difficult to be a loner Christian - so "nuzzle up
to" and keep close to other Christians. It's kind of like a charcoal
fire - a lone piece of charcoal has a tough time keeping itself hot
and doing what it was made to do - but if you have several/many
charcoal pieces bunched up together, they keep each other lit and hot
and doing what they are supposed to do.
Hang in there, Crying. I'm praying for you.

I'll write again next week,
Lori

[TILM]

Dear Crying,
A group member here wanted me to share a note from her. Here it
is:

....Some time ago I was struggling with similar issues to "Crying". I
had a mormon boyfriend but was having a real battle with what I knew
to be true. If you could pass on my encouragement to her and let her
know that she is loved and being prayed for that would be great......

God bless

Agnes xxx

On Jul 2, 2:30 pm, Cryingontheinside <jolene...@gmail.com> wrote:

[TILM]

Dear Crying,
You have been in my thoughts and prayers. How are you doing? Is
there anything specific I can pray for?

Warm hugs,
Lori

On Jul 2, 2:30 pm, Cryingontheinside <jolene...@gmail.com> wrote: