TREV-: Jest For Kids 06-25-10

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JEST FOR KIDS 06-25-10    Riddles and Puns for the 8 to 14 year old       RIDDLES   What is the difference between the sun and a loaf of bread?   One arises in the east, the other rises from the yeast   What happened when the computer fell on the floor?   It slipped a disk   How did the invention of the wheel cause a war?   It started a revolution.   Which state has the smallest soft drinks?   Minne-soda.   Why are graveyards noisy?   Because of the coffin!   What did one pencil say to the other pencil?   You're looking sharp today   Why are ghosts terrible liars?   Because anyone can see through them       SCHOOL WORK   Define "Inbred": Within a loaf of rye   Use "Kilter" in a sentence: The years of drug abuse finally KILTER   10 rations = 1 decoration   "I see," said the blind magician, as he turned his horse into an alley.   Old archers never die, they just bow and quiver.   "I manufacture tabletops for shops," said Tom counterproductively.       PUNS & OTHER HUMOR     There is nothing worse   Than poems about cute cats.   It is all perverse.    (John S. Crosbie)   The women's Olympic swimming champion was a girl worth wading for   When she told me I was average, she was just being mean.   If an airport is so safe, then why do they call it a terminal?   Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.   When the mother returned from the grocery store, her small son pulled out the box of animal crackers he had begged for, then he spread the animal-shaped crackers all over the kitchen counter. "What are you doing?" his mom asked. "The box says you can't eat them if the seal is broken," the boy explained. "I'm looking for the seal."   This scoutmaster and his wife were driving along a rural highway, when they found the road blocked by a herd of cows that had escaped through a broken fence. The scoutmaster tried honking his horn to scare the cattle from the pavement, but to no avail. For some reason, no sound was heard. He got out of the car, lifted the hood, and saw the problem, a loose wire, which he quickly fixed. As he got back into the car, his wife asked him if he'd had any luck. "Yep", he replied. "Beep repaired!"       ____________________________________________________________     No virus found in this incoming message. Checked by AVG - www.avg.com Version: 9.0.830 / Virus Database: 271.1.1/2962 - Release Date: 06/25/10 18:35:00