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MUSIC: Immorality

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eye WEEKLY

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Jul 5, 1995, 3:00:00 AM7/5/95
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eye WEEKLY July 6 1995
Toronto's arts newspaper .....free every Thursday
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MUSIC MUSIC

IMMORALITY

by
MARC WEISBLOTT


It's like Vietnam all over again -- Pearl Jam's decision to wage war
on the totalitarian Ticketmaster has resulted in something between a
stalemate and a surrender. Any attempts to carve through red tape only
resulted in even more bloodshed, generating a tsunami of corporate
doublespeak and, ultimately, the surrender of one Eddie Vedder to the
stomach flu.

For one monolithic, media attention-evading, invidious corporate sloth
to attempt to slay another was an awfully altruistic gesture. But if
you consider the common antics of Ticketmaster and their arch enemies,
it's sorta like the pair are twin sons of different mothers.

TICKETMASTER
MASTERVEDDER

Irrational "service" charges applied to already-outrageous prices of
concert tickets nevertheless snapped up by ardent Pearl Jam fans.
Irrational "import" charges applied to already-outrageous prices of CD
singles nevertheless snapped up by ardent Pearl Jam fans.

Telephone ordering saves many fans the hassle of schlepping down to
the stadium and being held captive for several hours while waiting for
box office sales to commence. Reluctance to tour saves many fans the
hassle of schlepping down to the stadium and being held captive for
several hours while waiting for the concert to commence.

Not even those first in line are guaranteed good seats, due to much-
maligned techniques of seemingly random distribution. Not even those
in the front row are guaranteed a good concert, due to much-maligned
techniques of seemingly random dissonance.

Awkward-sized envelope containing tickets cluttered with cryptic
graphics and several enclosed sheets of useless information. Awkward-
sized package containing Vitalogy CD cluttered with cryptic graphics
and several enclosed sheets of useless information.

Astute business sense has effectively quashed the ambitions of
countless other would-be power brokers. Astute business sense has
effectively quashed the ambitions of countless other would-be power
balladeers.


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