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If your child has bowel movements (BMs) in places other than the toilet, you know how frustrating it can be. Parents might assume that kids who soil their pants are misbehaving or too lazy to use the bathroom when they have the urge to go.
But many kids beyond the age of toilet teaching (generally older than 4 years) who soil their underwear have a condition known as encopresis (en-kah-PREE-sis). They have a problem with their bowels that dulls the normal urge to go to the bathroom. So they can't control the accidents that usually follow.
Most encopresis cases are due to constipation. Stool (poop) is hard, dry, and difficult to pass when a person is constipated. Many kids "hold" their BMs to avoid the pain they feel when they go to the bathroom, which sets the stage for having a poop accident.
A child who passes a soft, medium-sized BM without any problems every 3 days is not constipated. But a child who passes a hard BM (small or large) every other day is. So are other kids who may go every day, but only pass hard little balls and always have poop left behind in the rectum.
In time, the rectum and lower part of the colon get so full that it's hard for the sphincter (the muscular valve that controls the passage of feces out of the anus) to hold the poop in. Partial BMs may pass through, causing the child to soil their pants. Softer poop may also leak out around the large mass of feces and stain the child's underwear when the sphincter relaxes.
Parents can get upset when their child has poop accidents. But remember that kids cannot stop the accidents, and often feel ashamed and embarrassed by them. Some even try to hide their soiled underpants from their parents. Supporting kids and finding and treating the cause of the soiling will help it get better.
Diet and exercise are very important in keeping stools soft and BMs regular. Make sure your child gets plenty of fiber-rich foods. Serve fresh fruits, dried fruits like prunes and raisins, dried beans, vegetables, and high-fiber bread and cereal.
Help your child drink plenty of liquids each day, especially water. Diluted 100% fruit juice (like pear, peach, or prune) is an option if your child isn't drinking enough water. Limit fast foods and junk foods. It also might help to limit your child's daily dairy intake (including milk, cheese, and yogurt).
Successful treatment of encopresis depends on the support a child gets. Some parents find that positive reinforcement helps to encourage the child throughout treatment. For instance, put a star or sticker on the poop calendar for having a BM (or even for trying to), sitting on the toilet, or taking medicines.
The first visible sign of puberty in adolescents is the development of breast buds. Breast buds typically appear around age nine or ten. At first, the areola (pigmented area around the nipple) becomes darker in color and enlarges. It rises to become a mound that is a hard and knot-like bump. This is the breast bud. It is perfectly normal for breast buds to first appear in just one breast. The other side will catch up, but this can take several months, so it is important to be patient. Once breast buds appear, menstruation usually begins in about two years. Before this happens, however, more body changes occur. For most girls, breasts will continue to develop until around 17 or 18 years of age.
About a year after breast buds appear girls will notice a white, cream colored or yellow substance on their underwear. This substance is called vaginal discharge and most often appears six months to one year before menstruation begins.
Vaginal discharge has the important job of keeping the vagina clean. Discharge provides a home to the good bacteria in the body that fights other, not so good germs. It does not stain underwear, however, some girls prefer to wear a mini pad to absorb the discharge.
Once menstruation begins, discharge will continue to be a part of life throughout adulthood. The consistency of the discharge, however, will change throughout each cycle (see below) based on hormonal changes occurring in the body. Nothing needs to be done for discharge unless pain, itching or a foul odor is noted, in which case a quick visit to the doctor may be in order.
While the culmination of puberty leads to the start of menstruation, bodily changes continue until around 17 or 18 years of age. Puberty is a time filled with many questions for young girls. It is important that parents provide their daughters with quality information to help them prepare for the changes that will come with maturity.
If you have questions about puberty, menstruation or have any other pediatric development concerns, please contact Rainbow Pediatrics at 910.486.5437 or visit us online. Our highly experienced pediatric providers are here to support you.
Finally, be open to their opinion, but use this as a teachable moment to teach respect and submission. Your daughter just might have some strong opinions about this. If she disagrees with yours, encourage her to respect your authority.
Dannah Gresh is a best-selling author and the creator of Secret Keeper Girl. Best-known for And the Bride Wore White and Lies Young Women Believe (co-written with Nancy Leigh DeMoss), Dannah is a gifted communicator whose ministry focus is coaching moms to be great connectors to their tween and teen children. She and her husband Bob are left to run a menagerie of animals on a hobby farm since her three young adult children have flown the coop. Her happiest times are when all the chicks are back in the nest.
What a great post. A nice balance between fact and opinion (a very valid opinion, I might add). I work with teens and I can tell you that guys love to see the 'thong' popping up from girls' low-rise jeans. The only reason a thong is worn is to be sexy, period. And teenage girls have no business wearing them.
I am currently in college, and I began wearing thongs as a freshman in high school. Before I began wearing them, I talked it over with my mom. She wasn't exactly thrilled with the idea (partly because they sounded so uncomfortable to her). My mom, however, raised me to be modest and to respect myself; in fact, we got into a fight or two when I was younger about letting my bra straps show when I wanted to wear a spaghetti-strap shirt. She was always careful to point out fashions that might be distasteful, embarrassing, or immodest.
Because of her upbringing, when the issue of thongs came up, she knew she could trust me to be responsible. She knew I would find it extremely embarrassing to have any of my underwear peeping out (especially a thong), and she knew I would respect her and myself by being responsible.
To this day, I am still careful to conceal my undergarments. I personally hate VPLs, which is why I choose to wear thongs. I did not wear them to be purposefully "sexy." I actually find them comfortable and helpful in eliminating VPLs. I credit my mother, however, for giving me the freedom to try them and for giving me the freedom to have a taste of making my own decisions when I was 15 while still being responsible and considerate of myself and of others.
If you wear thongs, be careful when you squat or bend. Ha Ha I saw a young lady picking her baby out of a stroller the other day at the post office. Pink string and then pink you know what all in one view. I see teens and tweens doing the same at the mall quite often as well.
I researched and found that the thong started with strippers. Therefore, I think it has a skanky connotation. And it is definitely not healthy for the sensitive female body. The fashion industry does not care about your health so why stupidly follow what they tell you what yo think is important. I hate mind control of any type. By its nature its purpose is to harm. Turn your brain on and leave in that position
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This story about my son and I may sound all too familiar to you. The fact is that a lot of kids are particular about what kinds of clothing they wear. It could be their socks, pants, or a preference to wear no clothing at all!
Lots of kids, like my son, have a sensory sensitivity to certain types of textures and no diagnosis. Sensory issues with clothing are specifically related to our sense of touch or the tactile system, which is 1 of the 8 senses.
Most kids that have sensory issues with clothing will often react this way. In fact, it could even be full-out sensory meltdowns over trying to put on a pair of socks, even special sensory friendly socks you bought!
As soon as kids feel like they have some control over what their body experiences, they are more willing to push themselves out of their comfort zone. If possible, give them two pairs of pants to choose from, ideally of different textures or fit.
While every child is unique, a lot of sensory issues with clothing are because of seams in socks, underwear, or pants. Or a kid has a strong preference for comfortable clothing that is soft and not constricting.
My son particularly dislikes jeans and any pants that have buttons or the hidden adjustable waistband. I know exactly what bothers him, so in his case, having elastic waist comfortable pants would be helpful.
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