Week Three Awards

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Matt Cella

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Sep 29, 2016, 5:32:38 PM9/29/16

to The Langhorne Lovable Losers

***The Trifecta*** Waiting For Superman

Only three of these have ever been given before, and this is the first time I get to grasp this truly rare trophy. Thank you Lord Eddy, thank you.

***The Eddy*** Waiting For Superman

It has been an ugly start of the season for my team, but it was nice to check my ESPN Fantasy app and notice my team was actually scoring touchdowns. It is always nice when that happens.

***Quad Balls*** Front Office Ouroboros

Moutoux is currently holding a perfect record, but he had to Quad Ball it out with a 1.2-point victory. These little victories are what make fantasy football so much fun to play and so frustrating at the same time.

***The Super Sharted*** Ambassador of Quan

It is pretty bad to get the Super Sharted Award when your star running back is automatically giving your team a goose egg. Tough to disagree with some of Jeff’s decisions, but Jeff is the reason we have a Sharted Award in the first place (ask him about what happened the night before his wedding…I’ll give you a hint…super sharted!)

***The Bottom Feeder*** Flash Gordon

Ask how Jeff and Ron feel about receiving a “L” and Sethykins walks away with a win by scoring less points. It sucks, its not fair, we scream at Lord Eddy Field, but at least Seth gets this crappy award.

***Wait, We Aren’t Playing Golf*** Fuzzy Dunlop

A Flyswatter is right on the money to describe Kevan’s performance this week. This is the lowest score of the season, and it is a complete 180 after winning the Eddy the week before

***The Poopy Pants***

Kevan add the PP award in his comments, but this offense needs to make the official awards. Robert Schopf III. There is no excuse for not doing the Power Rankings. You are a leader in the LLL, a former champion, and an ambassador for the fake game of Fantasy Football. We need…we demand that you compare our teams to something absolutely ridiculous like military weapons, deli sandwiches, or Kardashians. Shame…shame.

***The Beat Down*** Waiting For Superman

I get to rename Kevan’s team this week. Kevan was riding high after week 2 especially because his keeper DeAngelo Williams was incredible. However, Kevan was just renting an RB1 for the first three weeks before LeVeon Bell came back. We all know what Kevan does with his keepers, so it is only a matter of time. Kevan I rename you