Tarheel Hash 696, June 5th, 2026: An Evening Foray Farewell to Squirts Under Pressure and DIE Corn
Lickety
Tarheel Hash 696, June 5th, 2026: An Evening Foray Farewell to Squirts Under Pressure and DIE Corn
Hares: Squirts Under Pressure, DIE Corn, Slippery Slot
Hashers emeriti: Humper, Goes Down Hard, Sponge, Eunuch Bomber (with better half, Marion)
Pre-Trail and On-After Attendees : Eunuch Bomber and wife, Marion; Just Erin, AC’s better half; Slapper, Panties’ partner in crime; Elicks’er and her husband, E- I- E- I- Blow
Visitors: Little Debbie and The Love Butt (now South Carolina residents)
Late-Cummer: Cocksford Kink (commented: the trail so well-marked he caught up easily – in time for the H2O Break)
The Pack: Humper; Sponge; Goes Down Hard; Road Muffin; St. Rollherover; Big Box; Jerkules; Money Talks; Swings on Wood; Short Shaft; Mutant Gene; Slow Hole; Tight Lips; Gockel Stumper; Comfort; Rainbow; Panties in the Hood; A$$ Clown; Dr. Perky; Just Steve; Pedifido; Endangered Feces; Scrubjay; Just Debs; Butt-Parking Device; Rod n Staff; Sticky Num-Nums; SeeNoEno; SpeakNoEno; PITA; Mr. Cream Jeans; Lickety Spit
Photo Album:
Below is a link to the Flickr photo album for Tarheel Hash 696. The collection captures moments from our gathering before the pack set off, along the trail itself, and at the Après—where we come together afterward to enjoy great refreshments courtesy of the hares. Captions accompany the photos and can be viewed by hovering near the bottom of each image.
Together, these pictures tell a very special story: that of a couple we’ve known in the hash for years. This event served as a send-off for them—on the evening before they boarded a flight to their new home in Invercargill, New Zealand. We wish them a future filled with beautiful days and spectacular sunsets. They’ll still be back to visit family—and of course, the hash will always be part of that.
https://flickr.com/photos/147890119@N04/albums/72177720334313297
Summary:
Part 1: When a Sendoff is Also a Reunion
Hash 696 was more than just another gathering of the Tarheel Hash. On the eve of their departure for New Zealand, Squirts Under Pressure and DIE Corn organized one final trail, assisted by co-hare Slippery Slot, giving friends a chance to celebrate their next adventure while sharing one last evening together.
The occasion quickly became something of a reunion, too. Familiar faces many of us hadn’t seen in some time returned for the send-off, making the trip back to see the haring couple off and wish them luck in their future ventures. Conversations sprang up across the parking area as people exchanged stories, caught up on life changes, and welcomed one another with the same good humor that has always defined the hash.
Before long, the usual pre-trail rituals were underway. The waiver was signed, photos were taken, trail and some hashers were decked out in neon shirts while others sported gear acquired from distant kennels. The hashers kept arriving, the group growing larger, until it was finally time to circle up for introductions.
As introductions concluded, attention turned to the evening's hares. Squirts Under Pressure and DIE Corn took center stage, explaining the trail marks and offering a few final instructions before sending the pack on its way. With farewells temporarily set aside and adventure awaiting on the trail, the hashers packed off in search of the first mark.
Part 2: Trail: A Patchwork of Color, Quirk, and Charm
Like many memorable Tarheel trails, this one refused to be defined by a single setting. The departing hares led us across grassy hillsides, through shaded woods, over streams, along quiet neighborhood streets, and even through a construction site. Around each turn, something new seemed to appear.
The blinding afternoon sun challenged us at times, but the rewards were plentiful. The trail was remarkably diverse: some water features included a glassy lake, an embankment above a wooded stormwater basin, and a rock-lined dam crossing a waterway. Arboreal scenery was plentiful, including patches of forest with contrasting canopies, some lush and dense, and others glowing translucently where sunlight filtered through the leaves. We were also charmed by a Little Free Library perched on a unique bridge, decorated with duck figurines above and multicolored bottles along the lower rails, which added a delightfully quirky touch.
With summer just around the corner, many of us were feeling parched before coming upon a most welcome water stop. Following marks around a bend, we discovered a truck carrying a vat of ice water and cups for grabbing, gulping, and quenching our thirst. Cocksford Kink suddenly appeared, having tracked us down by following the marks long after the pack had departed. Very commendable!
When it was time to resume, the trail continued its patchwork blend of pavement and nature, accented by wildlife along the way. A flock of Canada geese pecked through the grass in search of hidden morsels. Nearby, a gazebo draped beneath the branches of a weeping willow gave no clue that just ahead, concealed behind a curtain of greenery, lay another classic hashing element that many of us have encountered before.
We passed the dense greenery to discover – unsurprisingly, given the pace of development these days - a construction site. Unlike some muddy expanses of hashes past, this one was bone-dry, thanks to the cessation of some much-needed rain. As we crossed the broad expanse, a few slopes remained as reminders of the immense changes already underway, their surfaces crisscrossed by massive tire tracks. Near the far side sat an excavator, now at rest after what had surely been a long day's labor.
The hares did an excellent job of keeping the hounds together. Hash halts gave us opportunities to pause, regroup, and catch our breath. Ultimately, the trail blended familiar hashing elements with reminders that landscapes, like trails in the making, are always evolving. As Squirts Under Pressure and DIE Corn prepared to begin a new chapter in New Zealand, their farewell Tarheel trail offered a fitting conclusion: a route filled with variety, curiosity, and just enough surprises to keep everyone wondering what might lie around the next bend.
The Après: Ambient Lights, Warm Hearts, Tender Goodbyes
After the final marks were found and the pack had reached the trail's end, the evening's event moved to the place that had been Squirts Under Pressure and DIE Corn's home for the past few years. At the Après, basking in the soft glow of the approaching sunset, we gathered in the backyard, where terraced garden beds had long produced vegetables for countless salads and side dishes. Coolers were strategically placed, their contents readily available to all. As we mingled, conversation flowed freely, and many of us found ourselves quietly committing the surroundings to memory. Strings of bulbs draped across the decks of nearby townhomes began to glow as dusk settled in.
More folks who hadn't been on trail arrived in small clusters, opening the gate in the stockade fence and, like the rest of us, drifting between the backyard and the house. Beyond the sheltered patio seating, the back door became a revolving passageway, opening and closing as more of us climbed the stairs to the kitchen. The heart of the house featured tall cabinets along the back wall and a large island at its center, where a generous spread of high-end pizza, still piping hot, awaited. Stacked boxes occupied much of the island's surface. The mouthwatering selection included pies loaded with vegetables, others tailored for meat lovers, and, of course, classic cheese pizzas blanketed in rich, melted layers. A side of New Zealand cheese rolls introduced many of us to a favorite Kiwi comfort food.
As we gathered there, the couple's cat, Leonard, charmed us all, though I nearly stepped on him a couple of times. After apologizing, I stooped down to pet him, his fur remarkably soft, almost kitten-like. Later, I crossed the room to admire an extraordinary self-portrait Squirts had painted in college. She had been strongly influenced by Oskar Kokoschka, the Austrian artist renowned for his intensely expressive portraits and landscapes. Nearby, a photograph of the hosts captured the genuine warmth that has made them such treasured members of the Tarheel Hash.
Venturing back outside, I joined Mr. Cream Jeans, Road Muffin, St. Rollherover, and Rod n Staff on the patio. Industrial-style bulbs bathed us in a warm glow long after the sun had disappeared. Animated conversation filled the air, laughter and storytelling serving as a welcome counterpoint to the quiet sadness that accompanies parting from dear friends.
True to form, Squirts Under Pressure and DIE Corn proved to be gracious hosts. Even Leonard seemed to make peace with the sudden invasion once he recognized a few familiar faces. As evening gave way to night and the gathering gradually wound down, it felt less like a farewell and more like a celebration of friendships built over many years. Though Squirts Under Pressure and DIE Corn would soon be living halfway around the world, the warmth, generosity, and good spirits that made the occasion so special would follow them to their new home.
Acknowledgements:
Fellow Photographers:
Jerkules: shared a couple of special photos: He captured the magic of the evening sunlight: pure gold! Thanks for sharing those special moments!
Mr. Cream Jeans: Captured the pack on camera before we packed off and at the Après, too. His candid shots are so much fun! Thank you, Mr. Cream Jeans!
Introduction Editor:
As I listed the hashers who attended this event, it became dizzying - and I needed a second pair of eyes to ensure everyone would be mentioned and listed correctly under the respective headings. I contacted Big Box, who had just returned from a lengthy trip to Alaska, and sent her the list(s), asking her to proof them - and she did a great job, spotting something needing revision that, no doubt, I would have overlooked.
Thank you for your help, Big Box!
The Hares:
Heartfelt thanks to Squirts Under Pressure and DIE Corn for crafting a memorable farewell trail, and to Slippery Slot for helping mark a route that showcased so much variety and charm. Just as memorable was the Après that followed. From the abundant pizza selection to the relaxed flow of friends gathering indoors and among the terraced gardens outside beneath softly glowing patio lights, the hosts created an evening filled with warmth, laughter, and companionship. Their hospitality made what could have been a difficult goodbye feel instead like a celebration of many years of shared adventures and friendships.
Thank you - and On-On,
Lickety Spit