Second update for April

[Moses Moti Buchboot]

Hello Friends,

Tonight (Wednesday the 23rd) Class outing to Club El Baron. I will DJ there as well (last minute thing).

 

Sunday the 27th the San Tel Mo nica Milonga on the promenade in Santa Monica from 6-10pm.

 

"Tango night at the movies" date to come

 

See you around.

 

Happy Earth day, and every day.

 

Moti Moses

 

 

 

How to Find Yourself  (from WikiHow.com)

It's not easy to be yourself . But how can you be yourself if you don't even know yourself? If you've never felt connected to who you are, and you want to find whatever makes you, then read on.

 Steps

1. Forget about what everyone else thinks you should do. The biggest obstacle to finding yourself is feeling like you have to mold yourself to other people's expectations. While you might not want to disappoint the people close to you, remember that if they really care about you, they'll want you to be happy--and who finds happiness as a puppet? As long as you continue to exist to fulfill other people's ideas of who you should be, you'll never know who you want to be. Remember, "He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away." - Raymond Hull
2. Find solitude. Get away from the expectations, the conversations, the noise, the media, and the pressure. Take some time each day to go for a long walk and think. Plant yourself on a park bench and look. Take a long, thoughtful road trip. Whatever you do, move away from anything that distracts you from contemplating your life and where you want it to go.
3. Ask yourself every question in the book, questions that are difficult, that dare to look at the big pictures, such as:
   • If I had all the resources in the world - if I didn't need to make money - what would I be doing with my day to day life and why? Perhaps you'd be painting, or writing, or farming, or exploring the Amazon rainforest. Don't hold back.
   • What do I want to look back on my life and say that I never regretted? Would you regret never having traveled abroad? Would you regret never having asked that person out, even if it meant risking rejection? Would you regret not spending enough time with your family when you could? This question can be particularly difficult for some people.
   • If you had to choose three words to describe the kind of person you'd love to be, what would those words be? Adventurous? Loving? Open? Honest? Hilarious? Optimistic? Realistic? Motivated? Resilient? Don't be afraid to pick up a thesaurus.
4. Write down your answers. Beyond your time alone, it's easy for these thoughts to slip to the back of your mind and be forgotten. If you have them written down, then every time you reflect, you can review your notes and take it a step further, instead of answering the same questions all over again.
5. Act upon your newly discovered knowledge. Do the things that you want to do! Pick up those water-colors. Write a short story. Plan a trip to Fiji. Have dinner with a family member. Start cracking jokes. Open up. Tell the truth. Whatever it is that you've decided you want to be or do, start being and doing it now.
6. Be ready for dead ends. Finding yourself is a journey, not a destination. A lot of it is trial and error. That's the price you pay in return for the satisfaction you receive: More often than not, you hit a bump in the road, and sometimes you fall flat on your face. Be prepared to understand and accept that this is a part of the process, and commit to getting right back up and starting over. It's not going to be easy - it never has been for anybody - but if you learn to see that as a chance to prove how much you want to find yourself, then you'll find fulfillment and security in your pursuit. When you are yourself, then everyone will respect you more and treat you kindly.

Tips

• Resist the urge to feel like you're the only one going through this:

  All my life I had been looking for something, and everywhere I turned someone tried to tell me what it was. I accepted their answers too, though they were often in contradiction and even self-contradictory. I was naïve. I was looking for myself and asking everyone except myself questions which I, and only I, could answer. It took me a long time and much painful boomeranging of my expectations to achieve a realization everyone else appears to have been born with: that I am nobody but myself. ~ Ralph Ellison, "Battle Royal"

• Be yourself and make sure no one influences who you are. It will make finding yourself even harder since people are influencing who you think you are.
• Love you for who you are!

 Warnings

• Do not let other people influence who you are.
• Don't spread bad gossip or otherwise speak ill about other people. Knocking others down is not the path to self-knowledge. It only compromises your dignity as a human being and makes others dislike you.
• Do not let family members decide for you what you are destined to do. Their path may not be the correct path for you. What works for one person may not work for the next.
• Don't lie to yourself, and try to be someone you are not. Remember this is about being yourself. As it is important to not let family members decide, it is also important not to let society and the media push you in a certain direction, especially when it comes to your physical appearance.