For the week that's in it …
God disappears for about a week and the angels are sent out to look
for him. Finally, Michael, the Archangel, finds God. "Lord where have
you been?"
God replies, "I've been away on a special project." Pointing to the
heavens He says, "I've just made a new planet called Earth. It is
beautiful and lush and everything will be in balance on it."
Michael gasps in astonishment and says, "Wow, but what do you mean
about balance?"
God responds, "Well, look, I've made a continent, America, where the
northern part is rich and the southern part is poor, and the area in
between is going to be a hot-spot. Then I've made another landmass
where the people in the north are white and the people in the south
are black. One thing to balance the other."
Michael was in awe, but says, "what about that little green spot,
what's that?"
God smiles and says, "Ah, that's the Emerald Isle, the Jewel in my
Crown. It will be green and lush with beauty beyond compare. It will
be inhabited with charming, friendly people, people of great humor and
wit. And they shall be artisans, playwrights, poets and singers and
they shall entertain the world. And I shall give them a black nectar
which people from all over the world will come to love. And the whole
world will want to flock there to experience their warmth."
Michael is overcome with awe but then he stops and his brow becomes
strained. God says, "What's wrong my child?"
Michael then says, "Lord, you said there would be balance in all
things, but there's no balance there?!"
And God replies with a big smile, "Ah yes, but just wait till you see
the neighbors I am going to give them!
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P.S. Feel free to do a Scottish version ;)