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This question isn't just about spelling, because when these spellings were standardised, it is highly likely that all these words ending with "-ear" were pronounced in the same way. However, gradually between the 15th and 17th centuries as standardisation was setting in, the Great Vowel Shift occurred, changing the pronunciation of the vast majority of the vowels in English.
This group rhyming with "ear" is usually called the NEAR lexical set in modern English, and was pronounced /eːr/ in early modern English; in Received Pronunciation this is usually /ɪə̯/, often smoothed to [ɪː]; in the General American standard, it's usually /iɹ/.
A set which was distinct but similar in early modern English was that pronounced with /ɛːr/, as exemplified by the spelling "-are" as in the lexical set SQUARE. This is /ɛə̯/ in Received Pronunciation (smoothed to [ɛː]), whilst in General American it is /ɛɹ/.
If this is what time did to sounds of NEAR, why were words like bear, pear, swear, wear, as well as werewolf, ere, there, where (compare with the spellings of here, sphere and mere) so different, ending up joining the SQUARE set?
In fact, something analogous happened to great, break and steak. Were they to follow the regular pattern set down by eat and meat, they would have merged into the same set as meet /eː/ by the end of the 16th century, and then changed into /iː/, modern lexical set FLEECE by the end of the Great Vowel Shift. Instead, they only went as far as /ɛː/ by the end of 16th century, then went to /eː/ and then to modern /ei/, lexical set FACE.
These are all exceptions to the Great Vowel Shift. Notice that these exceptions represented by bear and by great appear to be closer to their older pronunciations than their lookalikes near and meat. It appears that the former pair resisted the Great Vowel Shift to some degree. But why they were able to resist it, and why they resisted it, are questions as yet unanswered. On a practical level then, these ones should be seen as exceptions and memorised (one particularly relevant one is the dual pronunciation of tear, which splits according to meaning).
One paper from 1962 complains specifically about how divergent the pronunciation of the spelling ea is in modern English, despite the fact that most of the words with this pronunciation are of Anglo-Saxon origin.
Michaelyus has given a good answer to the "why" part of your question. To reply only to the last part of the question: there are not any "strange" rules you could learn to help you to pronounce a new word. There are not even any non-strange rules. You do have to look up new words in a dictionary. Some things in life require effort.
So here is what I will do. I am asking our Department of Recreation Services to organize a competition between deers and bears at the start of the fall semester. They will pick the rules. Whichever team wins, I will say it their way for the rest of the year.
DEAR ABBY: I am one of the younger children of eight. One sister is deceased, which leaves seven of us to care for our father, who has had dementia since our mother passed. The four oldest are retired. The youngest three still work.
I believe we all should take responsibility for our father. Two of the older siblings are my sisters. I live on the other side of the country. I still work full time, but I take a leave for two months every year to care for Dad. The other 10 months of the year, my sisters take care of him.
I think this should be a "child thing" instead of a "girl thing." If everyone did their share, no one would be overwhelmed with Dad's care. How do I get my brothers to step up? The two who are retired refuse to do anything. One is still working, but he's a teacher and off all summer. My younger brother helps when he can, but he and his wife still work full time. They can't afford to take time off like I do.
DEAR DIVIDING IT: There are other ways to help with caregiving than in person -- one is with money. The family members who are stepping up should insist that the brothers who can't be bothered to do their part contribute to hiring someone to care for Dad if they are unable or unwilling to step up. If they refuse, and you have to go that route, an attorney might be able to convince them to do the right thing. Shakespeare's King Lear was right when he said, "Sharper than a serpent's tooth is a thankless child."
DEAR ABBY: While you occasionally print letters related to breast cancer, I don't recall seeing any related to male breast cancer. I am a male breast cancer survivor. I was first diagnosed in 2008, with a recurrence in 2018, and I have been amazed by the number of people I have spoken to who don't realize the fact it exists. Granted, breast cancer affects far fewer men than women, but it is serious, nonetheless.
Every year there is an entire month that is dedicated to Breast Cancer Awareness, yet most of the information is aimed toward women. This means we remind 50% of those who can get this disease that they need to be vigilant while ignoring the other 50%. Like most conditions, if you have a family history of breast cancer, it is important to be mindful. Abby, do you agree we need to get the word out? -- SURVIVOR IN OHIO
DEAR SURVIVOR: I certainly do. Male breast cancer is rare, but it does happen. (It has been mentioned in my column before.) Some famous men who revealed they'd had breast cancer are television host Montel Williams, Peter Criss of the rock group Kiss, Richard Roundtree, the original "Shaft," and Sen. Edward Brooke (who lived to the age of 95). Thank you to all of them for speaking out. Any man who knows there is a history of breast cancer in the family should mention this to his physician and take their cue from their doctor.
DEAR ABBY: I have been deceiving my husband for a couple of months and can't figure out how to come clean. I feel like a terrible person. We have been married 17 years, and during the first four or five we were happy. We don't have very many disagreements, but when we do, he always wins. This is because he's intense, intelligent and very intimidating, so I always back down.
The deception I speak of is that I have rented an apartment in another town and have lied to him about trips to see my sister, my daughter and my mother just so I can feel some peace, read a book, knit, and just ... be. He has no idea because our finances are separate (his choice).
I'm afraid to tell my husband I want to leave him because a few years ago I expressed how unhappy I was and said I didn't recognize this small, scared version of myself. He went from frighteningly furious to crying and begging me to stay. I felt so guilty that I stayed. He knows I'm unhappy. He even knows his quiet, underlying rage scares me. His pitiful begging me to stay makes me feel like a bad person.
I feel so much better when I'm away from him, but I'm terrified about how he'll react when I say I want to leave for good. I know that when I do gather the courage, I'll likely lose everything we have together. Please advise me. -- FACING THE TRUTH
DEAR FACING: The time to talk to an attorney is now, well in advance of taking any action. Doing so will help you to determine exactly what kind of financial hit you may suffer if you follow through with your plan to leave. Since your finances are separate, it may not be as bad as you fear.
DEAR ABBY: My significant other loves to play video games. I believe he has become addicted. I don't know how to tell him enough is enough. I would love to be heard and noticed by him, but he is too infatuated with his video games. I have even participated in his hobby with him. Am I the "bad guy" for wanting quality time? What can I do? -- LOSING THE GAME IN MARYLAND
DEAR LOSING: There is nothing wrong with playing video games -- unless it becomes an obsession. Tell your significant other that if he wants your relationship to continue, he is going to have to devote more time to it. Tell him you no longer feel you are noticed or heard, and that it is hurtful. How he reacts will tell you all you need to know about whether your romance can be saved.
DEAR ABBY: I am a teacher. I have a young son, and I love being off when he is out for school holidays and spending summers together. I feel I have the best of both worlds. I recently married a woman who is 14 years younger than me and is also a teacher. My wife hates the profession. She feels it isn't exciting or respectable enough. Her opinions about teaching hurt my feelings because I believe it is a noble career, plus it gives me quality time with my son.
My wife has decided to join the police force. It didn't happen out of the blue. We have discussed it for the last five years. I have told her it isn't the life I want. I worked hard to reach a point in my life to have a family and take summer vacations with my son. I was honest with her from the beginning. She often says she wants the time with our family too, and that she won't join the police force. Then, days later, she brings it up again.
We have been married only six months, but I regret it already. I didn't get married to be alone all the time and to take vacations without my spouse. I love her, but I feel betrayed and lied to. I also don't think she'll be a good cop -- she is just obsessed with police shows and thinks it's going to be like that. She's throwing away a great career for one I think she'll leave in a year or two. I feel our biggest challenge is her lack of experience. What do I do? -- WORRIED WIFE/MOM IN FLORIDA
DEAR WIFE/MOM: Calm down. There is no guarantee that even if your wife applies she will be accepted into law enforcement in anything more than an administrative capacity. Some sessions with a licensed marriage and family therapist might help the two of you to better communicate.
You each appear to have very different ideas about what a happy marriage consists of. If a compromise can't be reached, and because your marriage has been such a short one, it might be better for the two of you to cordially part ways.
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