Bobby And Lisa
Milba Vanpatten
Has the sexual intimacy in your relationship dwindled to almost nothing? Or, do you long to feel desired by your partner, but instead feel like you're being rejected? If so, this episode is for you. You'll learn why sexless marriages (or sexless relationships of any kind) happen, and how to reignite the spark with your partner and cultivate the physical and emotional intimacy you crave.
When couples stop having sex, it can be a sign that their relationships are suffering in other ways as well. They may be feeling lonely and emotionally disconnected from each other. Often, there's resentment or an old emotional wound that hasn't been healed. Sexuality can be the canary in the coal mine that lets you know your relationship is in trouble.
On today's episode, I'm answering a question from a listener who's feeling adrift in his sexless marriage, and offering some universal advice that will help every couple communicate better about sex, understand each other more deeply, and keep the spark alive for the long haul.
Join me in exploring how we, as therapists, can learn, grow, and evolve, in order to be the most trustworthy and effective supporters of our clients. We'll be discussing best practices and pro tips, plus ways to care for ourselves while continuing to help others.
Discover more and listen to episodes at GrowingSelf.com/therapists, Apple Podcast, Spotify, or YouTube. Connect with me on LinkedIn, Facebook, and Instagram for additional support tailored just for you, my therapist friends.
Ps: You can learn more about the show here, and this is the link to pass on to anyone you think could benefit from tuning into Love, Happiness, and Success For Therapists! GrowingSelf.com/therapists
All of this sounds noble, but overgiving is a habit that will eventually wear you down (and, that will keep you from having truly satisfying relationships based on mutuality). So how can you stop being an \"over-giver\" and start creating healthy give and take in your relationships? That's what we're talking about on today's episode.
I've worked with many clients over the years who were card-carrying overgivers. They were all smart, strong, competent people who excel at getting stuff done. The flip side of these strengths can be a habit of over-functioning in relationships, which leads the people around them to underfunction. The result is a situation where they HAVE to do it all, because otherwise, everything will fall apart.
At least that's how it feels. In reality, when you stop over-giving, you open up space for the people around you to step up. Some of them may disappoint you, but often, you will be pleasantly surprised at how the people around you rise to the occassion. You can stop feeling guilty, resentful, overwhelmed, and unappreciated, and start having the nourishing relationships you deserve.
You might regret not trying harder to save your marriage when you had the chance, or, if the divorce was your choice, you might have difficult moments when you regret your decision. You might even regret marrying your Ex in the first place!
Whatever flavor of divorce regret you're experiencing, this episode is for you. I'm talking about how you can not only cope with regret after divorce, but how you can use it to start a positive new chapter in your life.
When you have an anxious attachment style, it's hard to feel secure in your most important relationships. But learning how to self-soothe anxious attachment and create a stronger relationship with yourself can be the path to emotional freedom.
On today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, we're discussing how you can stop relying on the people around you to regulate your anxiety, and learn to manage anxious feelings internally. This not only helps you have better relationships, it makes you stronger, happier, and more resilient.
Breaking generational cycles is a self-affirming process. It frees you from ways of thinking and behaving that may have felt like \"just the way things are,\" and allows you to become who you truly are at your core. And if you're parent, breaking generational cycles can be even more important, because it spares your kids from inheriting the junk that's weighing you down.
Introverts are the unsung heroes of the workplace. They're thoughtful, analytical, and they excel at working independently. Still, if you have an introverted personality type, getting ahead at work can be a challenge. This podcast episode is going to tell you how to leverage your introvert superpowers (because I promise, you have them) and WIN in the workplace as an introvert.
Although introverts can be assets to a team, they struggle with visibility. They may hesitate to speak up in meetings and spend lunch hours munching a salad in their car rather than socializing with coworkers. Unfortunately, upper management might mistake your introverted personality for disengagement or even disagreeableness. But there are steps you can take to make your voice heard, highlight your accomplishments, and connect with your colleagues, all while staying true to YOU.
And more! I hope you'll join me and my Growing Self colleague Susan for this conversation! She's an experienced career counselor and she has so many excellent career tips for introverts that you won't want to miss!
It takes a high degree of empathy and intention to communicate about a hot-button topic like money and create a financial plan with your partner that both of you can feel good about. But that is a key to long-term success and satisfaction in your relationship.
How do you have a healthy sexual relationship with your partner after the trauma of infidelity? It's possible, and in fact, going through the process of healing your relationship together can bring you closer in unexpected ways.
Will you be single forever? If you've been dating for a while and struggling to find your person, then I'll bet this thought has crossed your mind at some point. Maybe it's something you think about a lot.
And the prospect of being single forever can be scary! We all crave deep connection and true, enduring love. The possiblity of never finding the relationship we desire is daunting, especially if your dating experiences have been grinding you down. But facing the fear of being alone may just be the key to not only loving your life as a single person, but also dating successfully.
One of the most difficult things about a breakup is the way it can leave you feeling disempowered. Getting your heart smashed by the one you love most sends you on a journey you never wanted to go on... but taking charge of your life in the aftermath of a breakup helps you emerge from the experience better than ever.
As a couples counselor who has seen my fair share of breakups and divorces, I know that heartbreak is brutal. But I also know it can be the doorway to a better life. There are things you only learn about yourself when it feels like your life is falling apart. And there are opportunities to discover strengths inside of you that you never knew were there.
Have you been thinking about getting back together with your ex? It's completely natural to wonder if getting back together with an ex is a mistake, or if it might be the beginning of a beautiful new chapter in your relationship.
In this episode, I'm here to offer you the clarity you need. We'll walk through FOUR ESSENTIAL QUESTIONS that you must ask yourself and your ex before getting back together.
These questions are designed to help you understand whether giving your relationship another chance is the right move. Doing this introspective work will either set you up for a successful reunion or save you from investing time and energy into a relationship that may not have a future.
So, make yourself a cup of tea, grab your journal, and let's dive deep into these pivotal questions together. By the end of this episode, you'll feel empowered and equipped with the insights needed to make the best decision for your heart and your future. Let's get started! ?
P.S. Let's talk! Every week on Thursdays at 12pm MT / 2pm ET I'm hosting a live stream on Monday's podcast topic to answer YOUR questions. If you're wrestling with this \"should we get back together or not\" dilemma, I hope you join me!! Submit your question in advance here: -lisa, and then tune in on the socials: Instagram, YouTube or Facebook. See you Thursday!
P.P.S. In the meantime, take advantage of the free resources I mentioned on today's show including tons of insightful articles and a curated podcast playlist all about how to get \"relationship clarity.\" They're all for you! -or-go
I love making the Love, Happiness, and Success podcast for you, but live streaming adds a special touch by allowing me to interact with you directly. I can't wait to chat about your life and your unique situation.
PS: After listening, I invite you to join the conversation live this Thursday at 12 PM Mountain Time (2 PM Eastern) on YouTube, Instagram, and Facebook. Bring your questions about travel and relationships, and let's dive deeper into creating harmony and fun in your journeys together. Submit your questions in advance at growingself.com/dear-lisa and get reminders about the live stream so you won't miss a thing. If you can't make it, you can check out the recap at: =2y1LGVrpRfY&t=687s
When couples are struggling with communication or conflict, emotional enmeshment is often the root issue. Once you address the enmeshment, your entire relationship can feel lighter and more enjoyable. But first you have to recognize enmeshment for what it is, and this episode will show you the way!
P.S. There is NO Thursday live stream on this topic this week. But I'll be back LIVE on Thursday 7/11 to address your questions about next week's podcast topic: What to do if you're feeling unheard in your relationship. Have questions already? Let me know and we'll discuss IRL on 7/11!
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