Forget Halloween! New Year's Eve is Better!

[Amanda Danvay]

I have to thank Kenny for bringing up his thought that one of the best times to commit suicide is Halloween, though I disagree.  Yes, Halloween has so many reminders to trigger suicidal thoughts.  This year, I knew a young man who had a very difficult time resisting his own suicidal urges back in October.  Finally, sometime in the evening of Saturday, October 26th, 2013, the young man, who would have been 16 come Valentine's Day, 2014, stepped off a chair with a noose around his neck.  I don't know exactly how he took that step, but, when the rope snapped tight and his neck was jerked, his neck was snapped. 

 

Also, from what I have learned, Kenny did hang himself sometime late in the evening of October 31st!  Like my young friend, Kenny broke his neck, and died quickly.  He killed himself just three weeks before his 59th birthday!    
 
There has been a lot of talk lately about a person breaking their neck when they are hanged, or having their neck snapped to kill them.  It also seems to be a popular desire, particularly among younger males.  Being one who has had her neck broken, although it wasn't a total separation, as if it had of been, I would not be writing this, breaking your neck is an intensely excruciatingly painful sensation.  And if you were to totally separate your neck, death would occur within seconds!  Maybe that is why these quirky young guys want to experience having their necks broken!  The sensation would be so intense, but, they would only feel it for a second before they lost consciousness and died.  By the way, I would gladly accept having my neck broken again!  Only, I hope the next time is fatal!
 
But, getting back to Kenny's thoughts on a Halloween suicide, it is a well known fact that this time of year, Christmas, sees a serious spike in suicides.  In many ways, I can see all the reasons, and I have thought them all through!  Yes, I have suicidal thoughts every Christmas.  I have thought about killing myself at Christmas every year since I was 12!  I am 23 now!  And yes, I am thinking about it as I write this!  Will I kill myself today (December 24th) or tomorrow (December 25th)?  No!  As I said, I think about it every year.  But, as much as I think about doing it now, the suicidal desires get stronger over the next week! 
 
I have tried to kill myself eight times, twice when I was 13, once when I was 14, again when I was 16 (that was when I broke my neck), when I was 17, three days after my best friend was beheaded, when I was 19, 21, and most recently, last January, three days after my lover hanged herself.  My suicide attempts at 19 and 21 were on New Year's Eve!  Last year, my girlfriend and I were going to kill ourselves together on New Year's eve in a suicide pact, but we both backed out at just before midnight.  Three weeks later, she killed herself!
 
Anyway, what I am trying to point out that, in my opinion, New Year's Eve is probably a more popular suicide date than Halloween!  It's the one day I am most vulnerable to my own suicidal thoughts and desires.  In fact, I can safely state that there is such a strong possibility of me hanging myself this coming New Year's Eve, and doing it just before midnight.  If I didn't break my neck, then death would take between 20- and 30-minutes!  So, I would have to hang by my neck by 11:30!  Either way, by midnight, Miss Amanda will be dead, hopefully!
 
Yes, I have thought this through!
 
What do you think?  Halloween, because of all the reminders?  Christmas, because of the stress?  Or New Year's, because of, well, just because?