fucked up on lemonade

[Corey Kilpack]

i went to the bar today to watch the opening game for the giants. i ordered an iced tea and a chicken pot pie. sat at the bar. i told the bar tender to change my iced tea to an arnold palmer. he came back and said he made me a john daly. i had no clue what that meant. 

15 minutes later i was fucked up. i called an ex girlfriend, and told her to come get me. i was a fucking disaster. i was sweating. couldnt think for shit. the bartender brought me my bill and i saw that he had put well vodka in the arnold palmer. i asked him. he said he did. i said i was fucked. i cannot drink. i was so fucked up at that point. my face was on fucking fire. my eyes were burning up. i knew i couldnt get myself home. i gave the phone to the bartender and he spoke to catrina and told her how to find me. by the time she got there i was a burning fever, crying, sweating my balls off. and fucked. she took me to the firehouse to get my blood pressure checked. the fireman wanted to get an ambulance, but i do not have insurance, so i just had catrina take me to my doctor. 

it took about 5 hours for the effects of the booze to wear off. my blood pressure was up for a while. and my resting heart rate was over 125 for most of an hour. it finally settled in the 70s at around 6 pm. 

that was some fucking bullshit. that bartender kept saying he fucked up. he didnt charge me for anything. i may go back and ask him for a 100 dollar tab for to cover all my medical bills from yesterday. 

jesus lord. that antabuse stuff is not to be fucked with. and that bartender was a fucking asshole. what a dumbfuck. 

[Blain]

Dude. That fucking sucks. That is insane. I'm seriously feeling ill by proxy, but I'm sure it's not half as sick as you felt.

Glad to know you're okay now. Fuck.

[Corey Kilpack]

It was insane. That bartender really fucked up.