shyness

[Maggie Renner]

In the article “Shyness: The New Solution” by Bernardo Carducci, the
mentality of shyness is broken down. Carducci explains that everyone
has the drive to be with other people and when one is not in contact
with others, they physically and mentally suffer. Even though this is
the case, there is a large population of people that are shy. The
percentage of people that consider themselves shy has risen from 40%
to 48% in the last 20 years that research has been conducted. The
quality of shyness is typically seen as being self-conscious, having
low self-esteem, and having anxiety (usually about social situations).
Carducci says that the way to break “the prison of shyness” is to
embrace it because, more often than not, it is in ones basic nature to
either be shy or by outgoing. Carducci found in his studies that shy
people simply need more time to “warm up” to situations and when given
this time, they are as able to succeed like those that are outgoing.
Unfortunately, shy individuals are often not given the time they need
and do not have the social support they need through major events in
their lives. For example, when a shy person (as an adult) is having
“first date jitters”, those in their support group are having marriage
jitters. Tolerance is often lower for those that need time to warm up
and therefore they are more susceptible to bullying. In addition, shy
people tend to compare themselves to the most outgoing individuals,
which is detrimental and heightens self-consciousness. Carducci,
through extensive research, found that there were three main solutions
that people found to dealing with shyness. The first was forced
extroversion, where the individual forced himself or herself to go to
social situations where they may feel uncomfortable and learn to
adjust. The second most popular was self-induced cognitive
modification, where the individuals try to talk themselves out of
being shy. The third was turning to drugs and alcohol to deal with
shyness (which is not the recommended tactic). Regardless of the
solution, Carducci stressed the necessity for people to give “the warm
up time” necessary for shy people to adjust.


In the article “Are You Shy”, the reasons for shyness are discussed.
One argument is the biological aspect. It has been found that babies
conceived in August and September are more shy than those conceived in
other months. This may be because during this time, there is more
melatonin in the mother’s body, which acts on cells to create the
hyper aroused temperament of shy. It has also been found to be
somewhat hereditary however, only 15%-20% of infants are born why but
50% are shy in adulthood. This seems to be a product of ones
environment and the way their parents treated them. Is has been found
that those that are outgoing find more success and that there are many
negative aspects to being shy such as, missed opportunities,
susceptibility to bullying, and being less likely to ask for help. In
the article “Shyness, Self-Confidence, and Social Interaction”
researchers observed different interactions to see what kind of
interactions showed an outgoing nature, while others showed a shyer
nature. However, shyness and self self-confidence are not absolute
states. Some people are shy sometimes and outgoing at other times and
in different situations. From watching interactions, researchers
discovered what shy people are more inclined to do and what outgoing
people are more inclined to do. Outgoing individuals are more inclined
to exchange minimal “setting talk” such as exchanging names and basic
information and go directly into topic conversation and discussion.
These observations do not determine whether one is shy however because
in other aspects of life they may be more outgoing than in others.