Favorite Bumper Stickers
John Red-Horse
Welp, I've been paying attention to such things recently and I've seen a
few that I thought were funny:
(1) Plants and Animals have Died to Make Room for Your Fat Ass
(2) Dear God, Please Save Me from Your Followers
(3) Vote Democrat, It's Easier than Working for a Living
Others?
cheers,
john
Victor Eijkhout
In article <53e00f$i...@sloth.swcp.com> jrr...@swcp.com (John Red-Horse) writes:
> Others?
Here in El Lay: "Keep honking. I'm reloading."
Seen in Kentucky: "If guns are outlawed, how can we shoot
the bleedin' heart liberals?"
Victor.
--
405 Hilgard Ave ................................. `[W]e don't usually like to
Department of Mathematics, UCLA ............. talk about market share because
Los Angeles CA 90024 .................... we're not going to share anything.'
phone: +1 310 825 2173 / 9036 .................. [Jim Cantalupo, president of
http://www.math.ucla.edu/~eijkhout/ McDonald's Int.]
Robert Blackshaw
jrr...@swcp.com (John Red-Horse) wrote:
>Others?
(4) If you get any closer, I'll fart (seen on the back of an old Honda)
Opinions expressed are those of the author.
Computers and Laser Printers recycled,
for fun and for profit.
Nancy VonStein
In article <53e00f$i...@sloth.swcp.com>, jrr...@swcp.com (John Red-Horse) writes:
>
> Welp, I've been paying attention to such things recently and I've seen a
> few that I thought were funny:
>
> (1) Plants and Animals have Died to Make Room for Your Fat Ass
> (2) Dear God, Please Save Me from Your Followers
> (3) Vote Democrat, It's Easier than Working for a Living
>
> Others?
>
(4)Horn broke. Watch for finger. (ObRedneck)
(5)I brake for hallucinations.
Nancy (there are more...gimme a few hours)
******************************************************************************
Nancy VonStein, Administrative Secretary (nvon...@cc.memphis.edu)(678-3972)
The University of Memphis, VP's Office for Information Systems and CIO
Campus Box 526646, Memphis, TN 38152-6646
in...@lehigh.edu
In article <53e00f$i...@sloth.swcp.com>, jrr...@swcp.com (John Red-Horse) writes
:
>
>Welp, I've been paying attention to such things recently and I've seen a
>few that I thought were funny:
>
>(1) Plants and Animals have Died to Make Room for Your Fat Ass
>(2) Dear God, Please Save Me from Your Followers
>(3) Vote Democrat, It's Easier than Working for a Living
>
>Others?
My favorite is the disillusioned art student who cut up & rearranged a
"Don't Blame Me, I Voted For Bush" sticker to read "Blame Me, I Don't Vote."
Jim
--
OS/2 ViruScan message: "MS WINDOWS found. Remove it? [Y/n]"
kory
In article <53e00f$i...@sloth.swcp.com>,
John Red-Horse <jrr...@swcp.com> wrote:
>Others?
I've always kind of liked, "Well, as a matter of fact, I do own the whole
goddamn road".
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I have this odd assumption that instinct will keep him from smashing his face
into a wall. --Trish Roberts
Robert Blackshaw
nvon...@cc.memphis.edu (Nancy VonStein) wrote:
>In article <53e00f$i...@sloth.swcp.com>, jrr...@swcp.com (John Red-Horse) writes:
>>
>> Welp, I've been paying attention to such things recently and I've seen a
>> few that I thought were funny:
>>
>> (1) Plants and Animals have Died to Make Room for Your Fat Ass
>> (2) Dear God, Please Save Me from Your Followers
>> (3) Vote Democrat, It's Easier than Working for a Living
>>
>> Others?
>>
>(4)Horn broke. Watch for finger. (ObRedneck)
>(5)I brake for hallucinations.
>Nancy (there are more...gimme a few hours)
Hi Nancy, know whatcha mean, but this one was not really a bumper
sticker.
Saw one of those little Reault Le Cars on which the owner had done
some creative lettering so that it now read "L'escargot".
John Konopak
A couple I like:
1) You can lead horse to water, but you can't make her surf.
2) The older I get, the better I used to be.
3) You can lead a puppy to the paper, but you cant make him read
4) Surfers are swell people
5) Primary teachers do it on the floor
6) Life is short, then you die
None is original. C'est la vie.
sunbird
kory wrote:
> I've always kind of liked, "Well, as a matter of fact, I do own the whole
> goddamn road".
i saw one today that said "Friends don't let friends vote Republican"
unfortunately for the proponents of this sentiment VOTE REPUBLICAN was
much larger than the rest.
Interesting troll, though.
--
sunbird (exuptr)
http://www.cyberramp.net/~sunbird
Dusti Lewars
blck...@clark.net (Robert Blackshaw) wrote:
>Hi Nancy, know whatcha mean, but this one was not really a bumper
>sticker.
>Saw one of those little Reault Le Cars on which the owner had done
>some creative lettering so that it now read "L'escargot".
My fav altered car symbol thingla so far was on a car belonging to a
"scab" teacher who worked at my high school when the regular teachers
were on strike. The story was that the scabs were being bussed in so
that their cars wouldn't be messed with, but this fellow decided that
that was pretty ridiculous, so he drove in. One of our reg teachers
went and photographed the guy's license plate. The car was a Rabbit,
and a previous owner had replaced the usual rabbit symbol with one of
two bunnies boffing. This altered image appeared in the photo.
Was probably the best moment of the strike.
John Fereira
"My wife said if I went fishing one more time that she'd leave me
God, I'm gonna miss her"
Bear Valley, a ski resort, used to give out "Ski Bear" bumper stickers.
Most of the ones that I saw were modified to read "Ski Bare".
--
John Fereira
fer...@isis.com
Isis Distributed Systems - Ithaca, NY
Michael K. Lerch
John Fereira <fer...@isis.com> wrote:
>
>Bear Valley, a ski resort, used to give out "Ski Bear" bumper stickers.
>Most of the ones that I saw were modified to read "Ski Bare".
A few years back, it was not uncommon to see bumperstickers from In-N-Out
Burgers modified to read In-N-Out
(B)urge(rs)
Then they got wise and changed the design.
--
Michael K. Lerch m...@pe.net mike...@igc.org
Riverside.CA.USA "If I'm not here, I'm out standing in the field"
Stella Hackell
My neighbor's car had
I Have No Idea What I'm Doing Out Of Bed
Her license plate read AIEE.
I have to admit laughing at
How's My Driving? Call 1-800-EAT-SHIT
until I saw the owner of the car deliberately rear-end someone going too slowly
for his taste.
Horn Broken: Watch For Finger
--my current fave. Not that I would ever, ever behave that way.
--
Stella Hackell ste...@apple.com
She who succeeds in gaining the mastery of the bicycle will gain the mastery of life.
--Frances E. Willard, _How I Learned to Ride the Bicycle_
kirin
My wife left with my best friend and I sure do miss him.
My other wife is beautiful.
I'm not drunk ocifer!
Nancy VonStein
In article <53h71v$d...@clarknet.clark.net>, blck...@clark.net (Robert Blackshaw) writes:
>
> Hi Nancy, know whatcha mean, but this one was not really a bumper
> sticker.
>
> Saw one of those little Reault Le Cars on which the owner had done
> some creative lettering so that it now read "L'escargot".
>
Well that's just plain cute. :)
I used to drive a Renault. The poor thang had an idling problem. Actually
I think it was a Type A personality. It just kind of spontaneously combusted
one night, while my son was driving it (at least that was his story).
Nancy
kmd
Robert Blackshaw wrote:
>
> nvon...@cc.memphis.edu (Nancy VonStein) wrote:
>
> >In article <53e00f$i...@sloth.swcp.com>, jrr...@swcp.com (John Red-Horse) writes:
> >>
> >> Welp, I've been paying attention to such things recently and I've
> >> seen a few that I thought were funny:
> >> (1) Plants and Animals have Died to Make Room for Your Fat Ass
> >> (2) Dear God, Please Save Me from Your Followers
> >> (3) Vote Democrat, It's Easier than Working for a Living
> >(4)Horn broke. Watch for finger. (ObRedneck)
> >(5)I brake for hallucinations.
> Saw one of those little Reault Le Cars on which the owner had done
> some creative lettering so that it now read "L'escargot".
(6) My Kid Beat Up Your Honor Roll Student
----
Kristen
Elizabeth Coughlan
Mr. Total Joy told me that fer...@isis.com (John Fereira) said:
>Bear Valley, a ski resort, used to give out "Ski Bear" bumper stickers.
>Most of the ones that I saw were modified to read "Ski Bare".
*heh* Kinda like "Unduepurversity"
Elizabeth ("my other car is a broom")
Mark I Rosendorf
How about:
* I'm only driving this way to piss you off
* Everything I know, I've learned from watching television
* God's last name is not Damnit
--
-Magic
ma...@esu.edu
MARK R.
Mary Wood
"Put a Brain in the White House" with The Brain's picture on it (of
Pinky & The Brain fame, of course).
Mary
--
):X Mary Lia Wood ):X You send me junk e-mail, I
(_| (_| tear off your head and feed
) http://www.cfanet.com/cats/mary.html ) your little brain to my cats.
brian odom
ma...@esu.edu (Mark I Rosendorf) writes:
> How about:
> * I'm only driving this way to piss you off
> * Everything I know, I've learned from watching television
> * God's last name is not Damnit
how about:
"It will be a great day when schools can get all the money they need and
the air force will have to have a bake sale to buy a bomber."
"Thank you for pot smoking."
--
brian odom
Brian Wagner/Dave Nicolai
Three favorites:
My other car makes this one look good.
Warning! I drive like you!
Get the phone off your ear and your mind on the road!
--
Check out our web page at:
http://www.best.com/~bigdoggy/
Michael K. Lerch
Debbie Schwartz <d...@coho.halcyon.com> wrote:
>It's not a bumper sticker, but the license plate holder on my Honda
>reads "My other car is a Studebaker".
I've always wondered if studes rise when you bake them. And how does a
car bake anything in Seattle? Maybe it should be a Studeruster...
>[So what else did you expect? :-)]
How did you teach your license plate holder to read, anyway? You should
market that if it works. You could call it Plate Tectonics or something
catchy like that. Or Read My Lipcense.
Mike (there's a C&W dancehall near here called the Mule Lip Saloon)
Todd Gilbert
Diane, I just found out that Mary Wood (ma...@meow.org)
wrote (oh, and great cherry pie):
> "Put a Brain in the White House" with The Brain's picture on it (of
> Pinky & The Brain fame, of course).
This seems like a good thread to try out my latest addition
to .sig roulette.
To...@see.below
--
to...@rt66.com TBTW #: 15 MST3K #: 50430
The only thing I've ever learned from religious bumper
stickers is that they should teach driver's ed in church.
Debbie Schwartz
It's not a bumper sticker, but the license plate holder on my Honda
reads "My other car is a Studebaker".
[So what else did you expect? :-)]
--
Debbie Schwartz d...@halcyon.com Killfiling idiots since 1989.
"Sometimes you just need to look reality in the eye,
and deny it." - Garrison Keillor
* I do not do business with newsgroup or email spammers. *
Jane
I saw this one years ago:
Support Bingo - Keep Grandmas off the street!
Jane (former lurker)
Ronald Lopez
Please a minor error in what the bumper sticker had, it's as follows:
Nuke an unborn gay baby whale for Jesus.
Ronald Lopez <RLJL...@worldnet.att.net> wrote in article
<01bbbcbb$43432240$cf8393cf@default>...
> The one that I have enjoyed the most was:
> Nuke an unborn baby whale for Jesus.
>
>
Ronald Lopez
*sunbird*
*sunbird*
Debbie Schwartz wrote:
>
> It's not a bumper sticker, but the license plate holder on my Honda
> reads "My other car is a Studebaker".
>
> [So what else did you expect? :-)]
i want one that says "my other car is being towed right now"
--
sunbird
sun...@cyberramp.net
Thomas Russo
kmd <du...@dsmo.com> writes:
>
> Robert Blackshaw wrote:
> > nvon...@cc.memphis.edu (Nancy VonStein) wrote:
> > >In article <53e00f$i...@sloth.swcp.com>, jrr...@swcp.com (John Red-Horse) writes:
> > >> Welp, I've been paying attention to such things recently and I've
> > >> seen a few that I thought were funny:
> > >> (1) Plants and Animals have Died to Make Room for Your Fat Ass
> > >> (2) Dear God, Please Save Me from Your Followers
> > >> (3) Vote Democrat, It's Easier than Working for a Living
> > >(4)Horn broke. Watch for finger. (ObRedneck)
> > >(5)I brake for hallucinations.
>
> (6) My Kid Beat Up Your Honor Roll Student
A favorite pair of bumperstickers, seen on an old curmudgeon's car in Los
Alamos:
"New Mexico, the Plague State"
and
"California needs you NOW"
--
Tom Russo RHFHGSA FCATB TMA#4 ISObabe TBTW#12 WWW:http://www.swcp.com/~russo/
"Once again is villainy like rotting meat before the maggots of justice!"
-- Peter Puppy
NOTE: A $200 archive fee will be assessed for all unsolicited commercial email
Richard Evans
I saw somthing on the back of a big flash car the other day.
It said "NOT HER CAR"
Richard.
Robert Blackshaw
eva...@callisto.lif.icnet.uk (Richard Evans) wrote:
>Richard.
This was not a bumper sticker but sort of like a vanity plate
suspended below the regular front tag on a fancy 4-wheeler.
"I got it in the divorce - it was his pride and joy."
Hell hath no fury ...
Bob
ApleAnee
How about
I KNOW JACK SHIT
Jeff Gyurko
My son kicked your honor students ass
A device which is exploding.
This wasn't strictly a license plate, but a plate holder on a 911 :
"My other car is a Porsche too"
Francois.
Michael Sullivan
In article <fpsDzx...@netcom.com>,
A device which is exploding. <f...@netcom.com> wrote:
>This wasn't strictly a license plate, but a plate holder on a 911 :
>"My other car is a Porsche too"
My favorite was:
"My other car is also a jalopy."
Michael
Robert Blackshaw
m...@panix.com (Michael Sullivan) wrote:
>My favorite was:
There are a couple of tags, tag frame ones nearby, the tag frame
on a pickup reads "My other car is a horse" and the vanity plate
on a Town Car reads "Dad's Pig". My dealer loaned me one when my
Probe was in for work and I have to agree.
>Michael
V. M. Haas (Me)
How about
Nuclear Plants are built better than
Jane Fonda!
Charles R. Martin
Doesn't stand up if you include the earlier "sex kitten" movies.
David Brown
blck...@clark.net (Robert Blackshaw) wrote:
>There are a couple of tags, tag frame ones nearby, the tag frame
>on a pickup reads "My other car is a horse" and the vanity plate
>on a Town Car reads "Dad's Pig". My dealer loaned me one when my
>Probe was in for work and I have to agree.
There's a plate around Atlanta on an Eddie Bauer Ford Explorer says:
Was my husband's pride and joy before the divorce.
--
-Dave
(email: deb...@mindspring.com)
Daniel Ciobota
This one's been around awhile, I think:
"If you can read this, YOU'RE TOO DAMN CLOSE!!"
Daniel
Robert Michael Taylor
My favorites are:
"My boss is a Jewish carpenter"
"If you can read this--I'm parked!"
Bob Taylor
--The only thing we know is that we don't know anything--
WWW: http://www.prism.gatech.edu/~gt5304a
Internet: gt5...@prism.gatech.edu
Al
f...@netcom.com (A device which is exploding.) spewed all over my screen:
>
>This wasn't strictly a license plate, but a plate holder on a 911 :
License plate I HATED the most was on the back of a new vette.
"WAS HIS"
-al "As low as you can get"
--
USMC: When it absolutely, positively, has to be destroyed...Overnight.
the tree by the river
In article <fpsDzx...@netcom.com>
>
>This wasn't strictly a license plate, but a plate holder on a 911 :
>"My other car is a Porsche too"
Back when I had a Porcshe, I used to make my own bumper stickers by
laminating the desired message onto a vinyl sheet with rubberized
magnets on the back--that way I could don whatever message happened
to suit my mood at any given moment. (I ought to get around to doing
it again, but, somehow, bumper stickers on a less-than-pristine Jeep
just don't have the same effect.)
Along the lines of the sticker Francois mentions (and this one took a
little while to get the right font for it):
My Other Car is a TONKA
Incidentally, my current .sig comes from one of those stickers; that
one was actually my favorite, though, once in a while I'd pop on one
of the following:
CEOs do it any way they want to
Nuclear weapons designers do it 'till they drop
Reunite Gondwanaland! (OK, so I stole that one.)
Don't laugh, it's paid for. (Well, that one too)
Spam, it's not just a meat by-product, it's an adventure
"I've been seduced by the dark chocolate side of The Force"
--
Trygve Lode | 6529 Lakeside Circle, Littleton CO 80125 | (303) 470-1011
Email for free copy of the soc.singles FAQ. Trygve's Holloween Party, 11/2
Chocolate! Costume contest! Return of the Jello Mold of Terror Contest!
"90,000 isn't old...if you're a Dark Overlord of the Universe."
John Fereira
In article <553525$c...@mercury.mcs.net> st...@MCS.COM (Al) writes:
>f...@netcom.com (A device which is exploding.) spewed all over my screen:
>>
>>"My other car is a Porsche too"
>
>"WAS HIS"
--
John Fereira
fer...@isis.com
Isis Distributed Systems - Ithaca, NY
Danny Nottis
Troy Beukema
Ok ok I can't resist.
"How am I driving? Dial 1-800-EAT-SHIT".
I just about went off the road laughing when I saw a rustbucket zing
by me one day with that sticker affixed to its bumper.
-troy
Al
fer...@isis.com (John Fereira) spewed all over my screen:
>In article <553525$c...@mercury.mcs.net> st...@MCS.COM (Al) writes:
>>f...@netcom.com (A device which is exploding.) spewed all over my screen:
>>>
>>>This wasn't strictly a license plate, but a plate holder on a 911 :
>>>"My other car is a Porsche too"
>>
>>License plate I HATED the most was on the back of a new vette.
>>"WAS HIS"
>
>Struck a little close to home, eh Al?
Let's just say I was going through a divorce at the time and
I found the plate to be in poor taste. I still find it in
poor taste years later.
-al
Mike Thrasher
My favorite was always
" Honk if you've got a lawn dart stuck in your head "
Although I've never seen one, I think they should make 'em.
Rock Out,
Mike
David Brown
Daniel Ciobota <dcio...@hiwaay.net> wrote:
>This one's been around awhile, I think:
>"If you can read this, YOU'RE TOO DAMN CLOSE!!"
I like the twist on this one "If you can read this, I'm parked."
--
-Dave
(email: deb...@mindspring.com)
GooodKarma
Best one I ever saw was "A woman's place is on a man's face".
I wanted to pull the woman over and ask where in the world she bought
it... too funny!
Laurie Meyer
: !>This one's been around awhile, I think:
: !>"If you can read this, YOU'RE TOO DAMN CLOSE!!"
: Similar theme: I brake for tailgaters!
My favorite one has got to be:
"Drive like Hell, you'll get there!"
--
Laurie O:)
"My software never has bugs. It just develops random features."
Prisoner
GooodKarma <goood...@aol.com> wrote in article
<55gp9p$i...@newsbf02.news.aol.com>...
> Best one I ever saw was "A woman's place is on a man's face".
> I wanted to pull the woman over and ask where in the world she bought
> it... too funny!
I'd love to have that on my car!!! My favorite to this point is:
EOD - If you see me running you better catch up!!!
For those who don't know EOD is Explosive Ordinance Disposal (bomb squad).
Prisoner
Complaints: postm...@crosslink.net
Trent Drake
Lauren Holmes (lho...@earthlink.net) wrote:
: On 30 Oct 1996 12:55:29 -0600, st...@MCS.COM (Al) wrote:
: >fer...@isis.com (John Fereira) spewed all over my screen:
: >>In article <553525$c...@mercury.mcs.net> st...@MCS.COM (Al) writes:
: >>>f...@netcom.com (A device which is exploding.) spewed all over my screen:
: >>>>
: >>>>This wasn't strictly a license plate, but a plate holder on a 911 :
: >>>>"My other car is a Porsche too"
: >>>
: >>>License plate I HATED the most was on the back of a new vette.
: >>>"WAS HIS"
: >>
: >>Struck a little close to home, eh Al?
: >
: >Let's just say I was going through a divorce at the time and
: >I found the plate to be in poor taste. I still find it in
: >poor taste years later.
: I don't suppose you'd like this newspaper ad I saw for a divorce
: lawyer, then: No text, just a photo of two walnuts in a vise.
: _____________________________________________________
: Lauren Crawford Holmes lho...@earthlink.net
Matthew Daly
In article <55gnc2$k...@login.freenet.columbus.oh.us> lme...@freenet.columbus.oh.us (Laurie Meyer) writes:
>
>My favorite one has got to be:
>
>"Drive like Hell, you'll get there!"
This is more a funny story than a funny bumper sticker, but it made
me laugh. This guy was driving in city traffic when he comes upon a
red light. The bumper sticker in the car in front of him said "Honk
if you love Jesus." The man honked the horn and the driver in the
car in front of him stuck his head out the window and said "The light's
still red, asshole!" and added a few hand gestures before driving away.
-Matthew
--
Matthew Daly I don't buy everything I read ... I haven't
da...@ppd.kodak.com even read everything I've bought.
My opinions are not necessarily those of my employer, of course.
Kathryn J. Andrews
Oh, you guys are great. Here's my contributions:
The weather is here--
wish you were beautiful
After the Rapture,
can I have your car?
_______________________________________________________________
Kathryn Andrews kand...@gte.net
Robert Blackshaw
deb...@mindspring.com (David Brown) wrote:
>Daniel Ciobota <dcio...@hiwaay.net> wrote:
>>This one's been around awhile, I think:
>>"If you can read this, YOU'RE TOO DAMN CLOSE!!"
>I like the twist on this one "If you can read this, I'm parked."
Still like the one on a little Honda Civic;
If you get any closer I'll fart
It was in a type size that you could not read beyond 20 feet.
>--
>-Dave
> (email: deb...@mindspring.com)
Jamie T. Doran
On Sun, 27 Oct 1996 00:55:44 -0500 Daniel Ciobota wrote:
> This one's been around awhile, I think:
> "If you can read this, YOU'RE TOO DAMN CLOSE!!"
> Daniel
"Mean People Suck"
The first time I saw this, it was on a car with a bunch of "flower child"
stuff, like the Ying-Yang and Peace symbol. The driver was a young lady
in her 20's.
--
______________________________________________________________________________
URL: http://www.infinet.com/~doran73 Jamie T. Doran
The greatest gift you can give another is the purity of your attention -
Richard Moss, MD
Michael Sullivan
In article <55l05e$m...@kodak.rdcs.Kodak.COM>,
Matthew Daly <da...@PPD.Kodak.COM> wrote:
>me laugh. This guy was driving in city traffic when he comes upon a
>red light. The bumper sticker in the car in front of him said "Honk
>if you love Jesus." The man honked the horn and the driver in the
>car in front of him stuck his head out the window and said "The light's
>still red, asshole!" and added a few hand gestures before driving away.
Obviously the honker did not realize that was a rhetorical imperative.
Michael
Seth Breidbart
In article <56359s$s...@news1.infinet.com>,
Jamie T. Doran <dor...@infinet.com> wrote:
>"Mean People Suck"
Why do they always say that like it's a bad thing?
Seth
Jamie T. Doran
> >"Mean People Suck"
> Seth
I guess it depends on the mean person.
--
______________________________________________________________________________
URL: http://www.infinet.com/~doran73 Jamie T. Doran
Life is like playing a violin in public and learning the instrument as
one goes - Samuel Butler
jhg
A takeoff on "If you can read this..."
Spotted on a pickup in Arkansas;
"If you can read this, you're not from here"
Seen on a vette driven by a beautiful gal;
"If you can beat me, you can eat me"
My favorite, remember Watergate (dating self here)?
"Nixon: the Dirty Cox Sacker"
Suellen Ek
j...@wm.ultranet.com (jhg) wrote:
That last reminded me of a bumper sticker I had when I lived in
Southaven, Mississippi (echhh):
"Why change Dicks in the Middle of a Screw?
Vote for Nixon in '72"
Got my windows busted out of my VW twice!
--
Suellen Ek
Providing amusement for the world since 1951!!!
wwtg...@aol.com
Just a few I've seen over the years,
Save a fat chick harpoon a whale (beach buggy in Durban SA)
Jesus Saves but not off Pele's right boot (Beetle, Brazil)
He who dies with the most toys wins (LandRover, Burma)
How did fish learn to smell before wemen learned to swim. (Not sure,
Cape SA)
WWTgypsy