"You want to see me sir???" Ensign Mcvoy asked nervously.
"Yes Ensign. Report to my ready room immediately," Picard ordered.
Sydney Mcvoy swallowed nervously, "Yes sir," she responded. She felt her
stomach plummet to her feet, and she had to swallow several times to moisten
her suddenly dry mouth.
She was relatively new to her official Starfleet duties. She'd only graduated
from the academy four months earlier. This was her first post on a real ship,
and the fact that it was such a coveted appointment meant that she'd done her
absolute best to do her job perfectly.
Yet now the Captain had summoned her to his quarters. She wasn't sure why, but
in her limited experience it was rarely a good thing to come to the attention
of your superior officers. She'd hurried to his ready room. All the while she
was going over in her mind what she could possibly have done wrong.
Finally as she was riding the lift to the upper deck it came to her. She was
new to the ship. She'd been warned that some Captains had a custom of 'meeting'
the new officers in an unofficial capacity. "That must be it," she assured
herself. She took a deep breath of relief.
She stepped off of the turbolift onto the command deck of the Starship
Enterprise. She had served short shifts here several times a week since she had
first arrived onboard, so it was nothing new. This time though, it felt as if
she were walking onto the bridge for the very first time.
She straightened her shoulders and calmly walked down the ramp. She ignored a
few curious stares as she made her way to Picard's 'office' She stopped right
outside the door and touched the pad to signal her arrival. She heard him
faintly, calling 'enter' and the door responded by sliding open to allow her
She stepped inside, trying hard to hide her anxiety as she reported. "Ensign
Mcvoy sir," she said smartly.
"Very good Ensign. Please have a seat." Captain Jean-Luc Picard waved her
towards a chair in front of his desk without looking up from a report he was
reviewing. She looked around the room curiously as she waited. It was a simple
room, reflecting the man's well-educated tastes subtly.
A brief smile flitted to her face when she saw the fish tank. "Pretty aren't
they?" Picard asked. He had noticed the expression on her face. "I find them
relaxing," he added.
"Why yes...I used to keep a fish tank when I was younger. Simple things
mostly, like goldfish and neons," she remarked. She blushed when she realized
how freely she had been speaking. She quickly stopped rambling and became tense
"At ease Ensign. This is purely informal," he reassured her.
"Thank you Captain. If I may?" she paused waiting for his nod. "Why am I
here?" she asked.
" Well, it is customary for a Captain to become familiar with his officers..."
he said. He sat back in his seat and steepled his fingers as he regarded her.
The way he phrased it made her realize it wasn't the simple introductory
meeting she had hoped it was. "I have the feeling there's something more...Sir"
Sydney said, somewhat boldly.
"Yes, you're correct. There is another matter I wish to discuss with you." The
Captain paused, as if considering his words carefully. "I try to take an
interest in new officers. I follow their activities rather closely to make sure
they are fitting in. Not to pry but simply because it is important to know you,
lives might depend on you. Do you understand?" Picard asked.
"Yes sir," she replied quickly.
"In the course of the normal evaluations I noticed that you've been scheduling
more then the normal amount of time on the holodecks.
"I'm sorry sir. I didn't realize it wasn't allowed I..." the Ensign began to
"That is not the problem. Though, I am curious about the reason for the
significant amount of off duty hours that you spend in there," he said in a
Sydney blushed a deep crimson color and looked down at her lap. "I...I'm new I
don't have many friends and..." she trailed off.
"I see, well I did a little checking Ensign. I must admit I was intrigued. So
I pulled up the programs you had been running. Would you care to explain?" he
asked her kindly.
Sydney's eyes went wide. She'd had no idea that anyone would have access to
the kind of scenarios she had created for herself. "I...I..." she stopped,
swallowed hard and tried again. "I...Sir I can explain."
"I'm sure you can. Let's start with this one," he said. He punched a few
buttons and an image came up on the view screen. "I believe you've titled this
one 'A visit to the spanking machine' he said. He looked at her with a raised
eyebrow, as the image of a large...well spanking machine came up on the screen.
"Oh my god," was all she could say. She buried her face in her hands and
refused to look.
"We also have 'a trip to the woodshed' and there are several 'bad girls on
detention planet alpha-three', very interesting viewing," he said. He scrolled
down the list of programs. He glanced up at her. "Please understand that this
is entirely up to you. You are not being ordered to discuss this with me."
She nodded slowly but didn't speak. "If however, you would like to discuss
this with me..." he left the sentence unfinished as she began to shake her head
rapidly. "Very well, I won't force you. You may go Ensign." He dismissed her
with a kindly smile, and she jumped to her feet and headed toward the door like
a horse out of a starting gate.
"Just one more thing," he said, stopping her before she left. "I want you to
see the ship's counselor Deanna Troi,"
"I don't need..."
Picard put up one hand to interrupt her. "I'm not sending you to her because
of your interests Ensign. I think she could help you get in touch with the
reason behind them though, and maybe then you will be able to speak more
freely. I would like to discuss this with you further at another time, but for
now you are dismissed."
Sydney couldn't quite manage a verbal response. She simply nodded her head and
then quickly slipped out the door. Once more curious looks followed her back as
she made her way up the ramp at a very hasty pace.
She practically dived onto the lift, and only when the door had closed did she
allow herself to burst into tears. She couldn't believe what had happened.
She'd never been so humiliated, "How could he watch those!" she exclaimed
loudly through her sobs.
It was just so unfair. They were her own private things, and she had never
expected anyone to ever see them. "Damn him," she muttered resentfully. Just
then the turbo lift slowed to a stop. She wiped the tears from her eyes hastily
before the doors opened to admit more passengers. They couldn't help but notice
her swollen red eyes of course, but politely ignored it, conversing among
She was glad that her deck level was next, and gratefully exited the lift
before the doors had even opened fully. She tried to walk the hall slowly. It
didn't work. She ended up dashing in the direction of her quarters, finally
disappearing into her small living space just before dissolving into tears a
"It's not fair. It's not fair. It's not fair!" she wailed. Stomping her foot,
and throwing her few belongings to the floor in an excellent imitation of a six
year old. In the midst of her tantrum there was a signal that someone was
messaging her. "Yes?" she called out loud, panting from her exertions. The
computer accepted her affirmative and connected the message.
"Hello, I'm Deanna Troi, ship's counselor. We haven't met yet but I'm..."
Ensign Mcvoy cut her off rather rudely. "I know who you are, and I don't want
to talk to you!" she said firmly.
"But the Cap..." her words were dismissed as Sydney cut the signal. The Ensign
knew that unless there was a problem with her job performance or a potential
danger to herself or others, even Picard couldn't force her to speak to anyone.
For the next few days she went about her work with a scowl fixed on her face.
No one knew exactly what had put her in such a foul temper but people were
beginning to avoid her company. Her mood continued to slide downhill, as she
refused to use her normal outlets, the holo programs.
She couldn't bear to wind down with one of her specially designed scenes, not
when she knew people, or at least the Captain, would see them. Every time she
had found herself getting irritable, frustrated, or just general bitchy she had
made her way to the entertainment deck.
A session of severe punishment was all it took to get her back in a good mood.
It relieved all her stress and left her free to attend to her duties in a
cheerful manner. Without that outlet things were building up rapidly, closing
in to the breaking point. She snapped at people left and right, even her
Within two days Sydney was beginning to worry that she would find herself
transferred to a much less desirable position if she didn't pull herself
together. When a second summons to the Captain's ready room came shortly after,
she figured her first commission was about to end in flames.
"Come in Ensign Mcvoy," Picard said. Feeling as though she were in the midst
of a deja vu fugue she entered the room.
"Sir," she said simply. She kept her eyes fastened firmly to the deck beneath
her. She knew her performance was being called into question. Embarrassed about
her poor behavior she stood there, cheeks flushed with shame. She had been
lucky enough to get such a prestigious assignment, and for her first posting as
well, and now she had blown it.
"You know why you're here Ensign?" the Captain inquired.
"Yes sir, I've been...having some trouble," Sydney whispered.
"So I hear. Several reports of insubordination and poor work effort. Some
remarks from shipmates about rudeness. Care to explain why your attitude has
suddenly changed for the worse?" he demanded.
"No I...I would rather not sir. I'll try harder to be more efficient and
polite," she promised.
"I'm afraid Ensign, that isn't going to be good enough. Unless you have some
explanation to offer I have no recourse but to send you back to Starfleet for
remedial courses in protocol and terminate your active status."
'Please no! I'm sorry sir. I swear I'll try much harder from now on. I'll be
the best Ensign on ship!" she assured him desperately. Her hands were clutched
in front of her in an unconscious gesture of prayer.
"Are you willing to explain what effected such a change in you?" he asked
Sydney sniffled, with tears in her eyes she slowly shook her head no. "Then
you may leave. I'll have your orders drawn up and sent to your quarters. We'll
be dropping you off at the nearest starbase. You can make your way back from
there," he said firmly.
Sydney stared in shock for a moment, until she realized that she had been
dismissed. She turned and headed towards the door. She was numb with the shock
of seeing her dreams turn to ashes in front of her. The door whisked open as
soon as the electronic eye caught her movement.
The action of the door opening before her forced her back into reality. No!
She was not going to walk away from all her dreams like this! It wasn't fair.
She spun around and marched herself right back to the captain's desk.
"Sir!" she said.
Picard had already moved on to other things but he stopped, looking up in
surprise and giving her his full attention. "Yes?"
"The reason my attitude is changed is because of the holodecks Sir. You took
them away from me and I had no outlet for my frustrations!" she accused. She
knew it wasn't the proper tone of voice to address her captain but she no
"I don't understand Ensign. I did not restrict your access to them in any
way." Picard said, confusion heavy in his voice.
"In a way you did Sir. Those were... they were private. Once I knew you were
watching them I couldn't bear to go back again, and I need them!" she
exclaimed. Her hands had balled into fists and made their way to her hips. Her
stance became aggressive and her Captain noticed even if she didn't
He leaned back in his chair and contemplated her. "Why do you feel you need
those programs Ensign? "
"Because I...I just do. When I make a mistake or do something wrong I...get
overwhelmed with guilt. It gets worse and I make more mistakes because of it. I
get angry at myself and take it out on other people and it just continues to go
downhill until I'm all wrapped up in trouble!' She said the words quickly as
though she would be too scared to say them if she spoke slowly.
"I see. So these programs...?" The question was left open, and she responded
"They give me...I can...they..."
"Ensign stop. Please...sit down and take a deep breath," he ordered her. He
was afraid if she didn't sit down she would end up on the floor.
Sydney sat down on the edge of a seat. She did her best to calm down while she
tried to sort the words out in her head. Finally she tried again. "When I make
a mistake I have to be punished somehow. If I'm not I feel terrible. My stomach
gets upset, my nerves are shattered..."
"So when you make a mistake you use these programs to deliver the punishment
you think you deserve?"
"Yes sir," she whispered. She looked down and waited for him to tell her she
was sick, but he didn't.
"That is nothing to be ashamed of young lady." She looked up in surprise and
he smiled. "Did you think you were the first one to use the holodecks for that
purpose?" he asked, amused.
"Why, yes sir. I guess I did," the Ensign replied.
"Hardly, in fact I doubt there is any use that the recreational facilities on
this ship haven't been put to. And you, young lady would have known that if
you'd kept your appointment with the ship's counselor like I told you to do,"
Picard said sternly.
"Sir?" Ensign Mcvoy said nervously. The tone of his voice reminded her a great
deal of the authority figures she had written into her punishment programs. In
fact it was very strongly reminiscent of her own father.
"That's correct Ensign. I wanted you to see counselor Troi so she could put
you at ease about your desires. I felt you needed to be reassured that they
were perfectly natural. Had you obeyed me, " and he stressed the word obeyed.
"You would have discovered this and your performance rating wouldn't have
suffered as a result."
"I...I'm sorry sir. I didn't realize," she apologized quickly.
"Ensign!" Picard barked. She instantly snapped to attention. "It doesn't
matter if you realized why I was sending you. It is not your responsibility to
decide which orders you're going to follow. You will obey all orders!" the
"Yes sir," Sydney replied immediately.
"Now as Captain of this vessel, discipline is solely at my discretion.
Normally with the behavior you've shown I would be transferring you to another
position. It would leave a blot on your record I'm afraid." Picard eyed the
young Ensign sternly. "However, I do feel somewhat responsible for your
behavior. Perhaps I should have followed up when Counselor Troi said you had
refused to meet with her," he mused.
"Sir It wasn't your fault. I..."
"Quiet Ensign. I don't need your input. I've already made my decision. As I
said there were things I should have done and failed to do, so rather then
stain your record by transferring you out of your first post I'm going to give
you a choice."
"A choice sir?" her stomach flipped over like a Solarian water sprite, and she
"That is correct. Since the discipline that seems most effect with you is
physical correction, I am offering you that. I will spank you, hard, for your
mistakes. I assure you it will be painful and the effects will last longer then
a session on the recreation deck, but your record will be clear, and you will
have no need for lingering guilt."
Sydney gasped, her mouth dropping wide open. It was just like her spanking
fantasies! "Tender your decision to me by 0800 hours tomorrow. That will be all
Mcvoy," Picard said dismissively. It was several seconds before the girl even
knew she'd been given leave to go.
She rushed out of the Captain's ready room as though he were chasing her with
a hairbrush. She didn't even care about the curious stares she received as she
flew across the bridge and into the turbo lift. Her face was so hot and red she
was sure it would soon begin to melt.
All the way to her deck she thought about Picard's offer. On one hand she
faced disgrace and the ruination of all her plans. On the other she got what
she had been needing. It wasn't a hard decision to make! She didn't need all
night to consider it, though she waited until the next morning to contact the
Captain with her decision anyway, not wanting to seem too eager.
Jean-Luc Picard's voice responded to her communicator. "You've decided?" he
"Yes sir. I'll accept whatever punishment you feel is necessary," Sydney said.
She congratulated herself on speaking calmly even though she was scared to
"Very well. You have an appointment with Counselor Troi in fifteen minutes.
Don't miss it."
"Troi?? But Sir I thought..."
"Picard out!" the Captain said firmly. He obviously had no intentions of
listening to her. She sighed, maybe it was all a trick to get her to see the
ship's empath. No, Picard had a reputation for being fair and honest with his
crew so it couldn't be that. She would simply have to make the appointment and
find out for herself.
She had never been to Troi's quarters before but the computer helped her find
it easily enough. She found herself entering the woman's room before more then
a few minutes had passed. She presented herself in the doorway and stopped,
"Ah Sydney! Welcome, I've been expecting you," the counselor said.
"Please sit down. I like to keep things somewhat informal so feel free to call
me Deanna if you like," the dark haired beauty suggested.
"Thank you Couns... I mean Deanna. I'm not exactly sure why I'm here. Do you
know?" Sydney asked.
"I understand you've made a deal with the Captain. You are choosing to accept
physical chastisement in the form of a spanking for certain infractions.
"Yes but... he told you!" Sydney was outraged. She had thought it would be
their secret. No one had mentioned that other people would know. How
"Relax Sydney. I sense what you are feeling. I assure you that I am the only
other person who knows. As ship's counselor it's my job to make sure you are
emotionally fit for your duties...and that includes being sure you can handle
the punishments you've agreed to," Troi explained carefully. She was as gentle
as she could be with the shy young girl.
"I don't want to talk about this I...can I go now?" Sydney asked.
"You may go any time you like Sydney. However, if you leave the Captain will
not punish you. He has told you the consequences of that?" she asked.
"I...I would have to leave the ship," Sydney said miserably.
"Yes," Troi agreed.
Sydney sighed, "What do you want me to talk about?" Both women knew at that
point, that she had surrendered to the inevitable.
"You may talk about anything you wish, but I would like to hear about your
interests in punishment scenarios." Deanna held up a hand before Sydney could
protest. "I haven't seen them of course. I was simply told a little bit about
them. I'd like you to tell me a little bit about the feelings you get from
running those programs," Deanna suggested patiently.
"Oh," Sydney thought about it. It felt funny to be discussing these things out
loud. She had never told anyone about her desire to be punished. To be treated
like a naughty little girl. Such things seemed like a throwback to the
"Well, it depends. Sometimes I just feel...relieved. Like all the frustrations
are gone and I can relax because some one else is in charge. I don't have to
feel guilty because I've been punished for everything I've done and I'm good
again," Sydney explained. She took a deep breath before continuing, "Sometimes
it's more sexual. I mean... I get excited and ..." she blushed vividly.
"But it is not always sexual?" Troi pressed.
"No Counselor. When I've done something wrong and I'm being punished Its not
sexual at all. It's just about forgiveness. Not all the scenarios I created are
like that though. I have more sexual ones but they aren't for when I feel
"Feel like you've been a bad girl?" Deanna asked.
"Yes exactly!" Now that she had started talking, it was as though a switch had
been hit. The words rambled out of her faster and faster. She found herself
confiding things she'd never dreamed of telling another person. The initial
embarrassment soon faded and she was becoming relaxed and talkative.
Sydney explained about her childhood. She had not been raised on Earth, though
she had been born there. When she was very young her father had been widowed.
He had promptly taken hi young daughter with him off planet. They had settled
on a habitable but still rough colony planet.
She had remained there with her father until he had died in her early teens.
As a result she had been raised much like a pioneer, and that included strict
discipline. When disobeying could easily be fatal, parents were very careful to
be sure their children did as they were told, and immediately.
She had never stepped out of line seriously because anytime she attempted to
do so she found herself spanked. Trips to the woodshed were common even for
young adults. After her remaining parents death, she found herself being
returned to earth to live with her mother's relatives.
The completely different environment was a shock, as was the lax discipline.
No longer did she have to worry about her father's leather strap blistering her
bottom when she got in trouble. That freedom quickly went to her head. It
wasn't long before she realized she was jeopardizing her future, and was in
danger of disappointing her father, wherever he was.
If heaven existed, surely he was looking down with his hand just itching to
paddle her butt good. Somehow she was able to come to the decision that she
needed discipline, and if her father was no longer able to apply it, she would
simply have to manage on her own. Enter the home entertainment holography
units. Nothing as fancy as they had in Starfleet of course, but they did the
She became adept and creating her own custom programs. Each one tailored to
help her in a way that no one on Earth could, or would. They had become a part
of her lifestyle and had helped her to become the remarkable mature young woman
that she was. Something that Deanna became aware of as the girl continued her
The meeting continued for quite some time. Deanna concentrated not only on the
girl's words but also on her feelings as she spoke. She made mental notes, and
some written ones as well now and then, but for the most part she just
listened. When Sydney had run out of things to say, Deanna smiled.
"I think I have everything I need to make my recommendation to the Captain now
Sydney. You can leave, unless you'd like to stay and talk some more?" Deanna
"No, no that's okay. I've taken enough of your time but...can you tell me what
you'll be telling the Captain?" Sydney begged. She wrung her hands in front of
her nervously, looking at Deanna with wide puppy eyes.
"I plan to inform him that you are a fairly well adjusted individual. You are
a little too introspective but I suspect having this talk with me will help
with that somewhat. In my opinion the need to be punished is simply a part of
your make up and not caused by previous abuse issues, so I see no reason why
your agreement with the Captain can't continue as planned." Deana said using
her most professional voice.
Sydney looked thoughtful as she listened and tried to absorb the words. "So
nothing caused these desires? I was just...born with them," she asked.
"Some people need these things because they've been hurt so badly in the past
that they don't know anything else. They need the pain to feel worthwhile and
loved. In my professional opinion you are not one of these. You are a
responsible girl, who upon determining that you needed discipline in your life,
found a workable solution. I think you will make a wonderful officer; problem
solving is an excellent skill to have, " Counselor Troi said with a warm smile.
"Well, if I was one of those other types what would have happened?" Sydney
"I would probably have suggested to the Captain that you needed some therapy
to help you move beyond those issues. And that it should occur before he tried
punishing you in any way. Otherwise there could have been severe emotional
consequences, and it may have fostered an unnatural dependence on other people.
Something, that would be perfectly acceptable for many people, but not for an
officer in the line of command. Even a junior one like yourself," Deanna
She patted Sydney on the shoulder and walker her to the door. "None of that
really matters though Sydney. You are simply someone who needs a bit of
external help to keep yourself on the right track. I'm sure the Captain will
find my report favorable. You should continue with your daily routine until he
reviews my notes and contacts you."
"Thanks Deanna. Really, I mean it was good to get some of this stuff out of my
head. I guess I've always thought I was a freak because of...well you know.
Anyway I appreciate it," Sydney said honestly. She gave Deanna a sunny smile
before she checked the time and realized she was about to be late for her duty
"Of course, anytime you want to talk contact me and we'll get together,"
Deanna replied. She watched as the girl rushed off down the corridor, smiling
to herself. Sydney reminded her of herself at that age. So young so
confused...but on a planet of empaths Deanna hadn't had the trouble that Sydney
had been facing.
Her somewhat different, but not wrong, desires had been noticed early in her
development. She'd known from childhood that it was okay to have the need and
the desire to be punished. They even took the sexual overtones that she felt
when disciplined, into account whenever she had to be chastised for something.
She had always known she was lucky to have been raised that way, now she was
sure of it. She had great faith however, in the Captain's ability to deal with
Sydney in the appropriate way. Some day that girl was going to make an
excellent officer, Deanna Troi thought to herself.
She mused over it for a few more minutes before she went inside to prepare
herself. Riker would be meeting her for dinner in Ten Forward shortly, and she
wanted to look her best. The new Rigellian blue panties she had ordered had
just arrived and she was eager to see his reaction to them later when he
undressed her, and took her across his knee. She had done her best to help
Sydney...and now it was time for Counselor Troi to have some fun.
Sydney waited nervously in her quarters. She found herself biting her nails,
something she had only done as a child after she had been caught being naughty
and was forced to contemplate her fate while her father decided an appropriate
The holodecks had filled her needs but the scenes were always preplanned. She
had written them herself and knew exactly how much she would be punished and in
what way. Now, she would be dealing with a new person. A real person! There
would be no script to follow, and it was very likely she was about to receive a
more severe punishment then she had ever designed for herself.
As she perched on the edge of her bed, she tried to picture being spanked by
her Captain. Her imagination, as usual got somewhat out of control, and she
found the images getting more and more frightening. "That's it!" she said
finally. She jumped to her feet, "No one said I had to wait here. I have to go
find something to take my mind off of this," she muttered.
She quickly decided to head to Ten Forward for a drink. If anything was going
to relax her that would. She had no way of knowing when Picard would have time
to meet with her, and she just couldn't sit around worrying for days. She'd go
"Wait, maybe I shouldn't go to the lounge," Sydney said out loud. She worried
she might end up having more then one drink because of her nervousness. It
wouldn't do to be called in front of the Captain while she was tipsy! In the
midst of her indecision the choice was taken from her.
The communicator on the front of her uniform suddenly summoned her, not to the
bridge, but to the Captain's private quarters. She gulped loudly and her
stomach sank to her toes as she swiftly responded. The response was automatic
and required no thought on her part luckily.
Taking only a minute to make sure her uniform was in order, she hurried out of
her room and down the corridor. Picard's quarters were not on the same deck so
it took her several minutes to get there. She took a deep breath and stepped in
front of the door. After a second's hesitation she passed her hand over the
sensor to alert the Captain that she was waiting.