It doesn't always get better.
Remus Shepherd
will accept this type of conversation anymore.
The recent campaign, called 'It Gets Better', is a wonderful idea.
Young people who are insecure about their sexuality should be supported,
and I'm glad that the gay community is rallying around their youth.
But for a lot of people it doesn't get better. It never gets better.
Although gays rally to support each other, nobody cares about true deviants.
Nobody mourns us. If we speak out we get arrested, or hounded to our deaths.
I'm not speaking metaphorically: A friend of mine named Steve -- a zoophile
like myself -- put a gun in his mouth in 2001 after being harrassed by a
right wing religious group.
It's just driving me crazy that the recent gay suicides are being used
to help young gays, yet I can't say anything about Steve's suicide, and
there are no safe forums where I can contact and support young zoophiles.
Anything I do in support of that community (I use the word extremely loosely)
only opens me up to the same harrassment that killed Steve. I experienced
some of it. Lost my security clearance and my job, but I survived. No
one should have to go through the same experiences.
Has it gotten better for me? Not really, in some respects. I still
live in fear of my past being discovered, and what that might cost me.
I'm not an active zoophile anymore, now that I have a long-term girlfriend,
so I'm not worried about legal problems...except I remember meeting a zoo
whose horse was beaten to death in front of him by policemen until he
confessed to a non-related crime. I don't fear just authorities, but I
worry that the authorities may be unjust. And so I stay quiet. My life
has gotten better, but the turmoil of my sexuality and the terror of how
much society hates me is still there, under the surface.
That's why it is driving me nuts, how the gay community are supporting
their own in the wake of the recent suicides. I could use some support
right now. I wish that I could give back and support others, because I know
that they need it. And I wish -- oh, ghod, how I wish -- that I could
have been there for Steve when he needed support and understanding.
Anyway, I wanted to get that off my chest. It doesn't always get better.
Sometimes the bullies hound you to death, and sometimes they drive you
so far underground that you are forced to change what you really are.
... ...
Remus Shepherd <re...@panix.com>
New Webcomic: Genocide Man http://www.genocideman.com/
Life is funny. Death is funnier. Mass slaughter can be hilarious.
Eli the Bearded
> But for a lot of people it doesn't get better. It never gets better.
> Although gays rally to support each other, nobody cares about true deviants.
> Nobody mourns us. If we speak out we get arrested, or hounded to our deaths.
Well some deviants at least. Some are just roundly ignored (autoasphyxia
for example).
> Anyway, I wanted to get that off my chest. It doesn't always get better.
> Sometimes the bullies hound you to death, and sometimes they drive you
> so far underground that you are forced to change what you really are.
You've been around for a long time and I know things haven't always been
easy for you. Zoophilia has never been the least bit interesting to me
(I'm barely interested in pets) but neither has it been something I've
felt worthy of scorn.
I think it is particularly hard for you because Americans (at least) have
such a crazy relationship with animals. How many people call themselves
"mom" or "dad" to a dog or cat? That's not a the relationship and it
instills a strange protectiveness in those people. Then there are the
PETA types...
When you need to vent, I think this group will still be here for you,
even if your tastes are not well represented.
Elijah
------
long time lurker
Norton
I agree with that. Remus, I feel for you. There is lots of
double plus non-good stuff around. Part of being alive is
doing your best to survive it.
--
--- Norton, another panixian in a different life.
Tom Allen
> Damnit, I need to vent about this and I have no good place left that
> will accept this type of conversation anymore.
>
> The recent campaign, called 'It Gets Better', is a wonderful idea.
> Young people who are insecure about their sexuality should be supported,
> and I'm glad that the gay community is rallying around their youth.
>
> But for a lot of people it doesn't get better. It never gets better.
> Although gays rally to support each other, nobody cares about true deviants.
<snip>
The problem is that the "true" deviants aren't as cute or endearing as
some of the characters on Glee.
No, I'm actually serious. Gays (men and women) have fought hard to
have a better image portrayed in the media. And since most people
know, even vaguely, someone that is gay (or someone that we suspect is
gay), it's become easier for straights to become sympathetic as they
see more characters portrayed "normally", i.e., as neighbors, cow-
orkers, etc. A generation ago, gay bashing rarely made the news; now
even people who don't particularly care for gays will admit that
nobody should be beating them up.
I'm not sure what a "true" deviant is, Remus, but the only way that
it's going to get better for any of them is when zoos, or BDSMers, or
latex folk manage to get their own version of Will & Grace on TV.
--
Tom Allen