Yes mistress.
christina
about the other. Perhaps if I took up that calling (lifestyle of
course, not pro) then I could do what I liked and not have to put up
with anything I didn't want. I would prefer a more equitable
relationship, but you all know my current thoughts on that. Better
than nothing?
christina
Jacques Michel
I think that there is a reason why so many dominae are pro and paid:
they don't get to do what they want. Maybe you talk to your pro dommes
friends again and ask what they get out of it.
Lusus Naturae
One of the hard things for people unfamiliar with the dynamics
of deliberate power differential to understand is that, if it is
to last, a power-differential relationship must *be* equitable
-- it must equally address the needs of all participants.
If you found a submissive man who agreed to accept you in the
role of dominant, would that truly satisfy you at some basic
level? Would it be worth the extra effort that such a
relationship usually requires?
What do you bring to the table that he might need? "Better than
nothing" might not do it for him. He might need you to actually
enjoy the dominant role -- to need his submission at a core
level.
I have read on-line messages from many a fem-doms deploring the
singular difficulty of finding male subs who really accept that
their own desires are to be subjugate. They find that far too
many male subs are of the "do-me" variety, requiring a dom who
behaves in certain preconceived ways, rather than accepting the
dom's own style of dominance.
That said, if you do find in yourself a visceral response to the
idea of taking charge of a power-differential relationship,
there are a few men out there who really need that, and whose
submission you would possibly find rewarding and exhilarating.
Happy hunting.
--
Lusus Naturae
Tom Allen
christina, the problem is that while the outward appearance of a D/s
relationship seems as if the Domme gets what she wants, the actual
relationship is pretty much the same as in the vanilla world: each
partner has wants and needs and they learn to balance them so as to make
everyone satisfied.
That's why it's called a 'relationhip', of course.
Yes, the idea itself is fun to play with, but in reality it takes a
decent helping of both knowing what you want and understanding how to
live with the give and take.
There is some irony in that, had you wanted to be a "pro", you could
probably have made a fortune as a pre-op.
Tom
--
They told me that I was getting a sweater for my birthday.
Too bad; I was hoping for a moaner or a screamer.
christina
Tom Allen wrote:
> christina wrote:
> > I know a couple of pro dommes. One definitely doesn't do sex, not sure
> > about the other. Perhaps if I took up that calling (lifestyle of
> > course, not pro) then I could do what I liked and not have to put up
> > with anything I didn't want. I would prefer a more equitable
> > relationship, but you all know my current thoughts on that. Better
> > than nothing?
>
> christina, the problem is that while the outward appearance of a D/s
> relationship seems as if the Domme gets what she wants, the actual
> relationship is pretty much the same as in the vanilla world: each
> partner has wants and needs and they learn to balance them so as to make
> everyone satisfied.
>
> That's why it's called a 'relationhip', of course.
>
> Yes, the idea itself is fun to play with, but in reality it takes a
> decent helping of both knowing what you want and understanding how to
> live with the give and take.
>
> There is some irony in that, had you wanted to be a "pro", you could
> probably have made a fortune as a pre-op.
>
other is a gg, and from talking with her it is clearly a form of
theatre.
She did have a *slave* once who could take an enormous amount of
punishment. Was reputed to have had 1000 strokes on one occasion. If
my friend wanted to go anywhere she just had to ring him and he'd come,
pick her up, drop her off, pick her up again when she wanted to go
home, and then have her slam the door in his face when she arrived
home. He cleaned her house every week. Eventually she gave him up
because meeting his demands for punishment was just too exhausting for
her.
christina
Roy. Just Roy.
pick her up, drop her off, pick her up again when she wanted to go
home, and then have her slam the door in his face when she arrived
home.<<
That's D/s? For me, that's a typical Friday night.
/Roy,
Tom Allen
Keep in mind that some men are kinked to want to provide such service
and they get some kind of quasi-sexual satisfaction in feeling "used" in
this way. This is akin to how some men want to be humiliated, punished,
denied sex, or to fork over huge sums of money. Ever read "Venus in
Furs" by Leopold von Sacher-Masoch?
Now personally speaking, I don't "get" this because the relationship
seems to be unbalanced / in the qualities that I'd like to have / but
when I take a step back I can see how the balance shows up in other areas.