Lava and the eherial Doughnut
Jack Hamilton
- a lava lamp.
Lava lamps bases come in various finishes, and the two liquids inside (the
lava and the stuff it floats in0 also come in various colors. I bought the
"Princess" model with lavendar lava. It's just too too for words.
When I first turned on the lamp, the lava just sat there in a lump on the
bottom. I didn't look at for a while, and the next time I glanced over at
it, there was this amazing phallic-shaped object rising from the bottom of
the tube! It was a long round cylinder with a little bulb at end. It
obviously believed in safe sex, too, because there was a little extension
at the top that looked just like the receptacle tip in a condom. The whole
thing was slowly pulsing up and down. No wonder lava lamps were so
popular!
After a while, though, it started shooting little gobs of lava out of the
top and then settles into the normal lava lamp behavior of little balls
floating up and down and rubbing against each other. The show was over.
THis morning, fate awarded me with a perfect doughnut, something I hadn't
had in a long time. Many years ago, when I lived in Palo Alto, I would
stop at Rolling Pin Donuts in San Bruno on my way back from the City at
2:30 (or 6:30) in the morning. Occasionally I would get there just as the
yeast doughnuts were being glazed. They were delightful, but I hadn't been
there at the right time for years.
Now I live in the City and work on the Peninsula. I get on Caltrain at the
San Bruno station, and sometimes go in to Rolling Pin for a doughnut and
coffee. This morning, what to my wondering eyes should appear but a baker
with a tray of glaze! They had warm glaze doughnuts! I bought one.
The difference between a freshly glazed doughnut, still warm, and a
doughnut which has gotten cold, is much greater than the difference
between, say, fresh-squeezed orange juice and canned orange juice. A fresh
warm doughnut is the softest, most delicate food you will ever encounter.
it practically melts in your mouth. it has a subtle flavor, and the warm
glaze gets on your fingers, which you then have to lick clean. Heaven on
earth!
--
------------------------------------
Jack Hamilton j...@netcom.com
Jess Anderson
In article <xxlhj...@netcom.com> j...@netcom.com (Jack
Hamilton) writes:
>I'd been wanting one for 20 or 30 years, and finally bought
>one last night - a lava lamp.
A rare thing: I'm speechless.
>THis morning, fate awarded me with a perfect doughnut, [...]
>The difference between a freshly glazed doughnut, still warm, [...]
>it practically melts in your mouth. it has a subtle flavor, and the warm
>glaze gets on your fingers, which you then have to lick clean. Heaven on
>earth!
Time for doughnut snobbery, I see. This crass commercial
product you so lovingly describe is the Ford of doughnuts.
You, sir, are a ruffian!
In the first place, no raised doughnut even deserves that
name; the only *real* doughnuts are cakes, and those must
(get ready to gasp, veggans) by fried in the freshest lard
until they are crispy on the outside. They are best eaten
with either ice-cold milk or the sort of black coffee one
gets only at my house and *very* few other places (a cafe I
know in Amsterdam, for example). If you *must* have
something on them, plain powdered sugar is the limit of
that, no glazes and *no* chocolate (which completely
overwhelms the doughnut's *own* taste)!
So there!
--
Jess Anderson <> Madison Academic Computing Center <> University of Wisconsin
Internet: ande...@macc.wisc.edu <-best, UUCP:{}!uwvax!macc.wisc.edu!anderson
NeXTmail w/attachments: ande...@yak.macc.wisc.edu Bitnet: anderson@wiscmacc
Room 3130 <> 1210 West Dayton Street / Madison WI 53706 <> Phone 608/262-5888
Ann Carlson
|>
|> In article <xxlhj...@netcom.com> j...@netcom.com (Jack
|> Hamilton) writes:
|>
|> >THis morning, fate awarded me with a perfect doughnut, [...]
|> >The difference between a freshly glazed doughnut, still warm, [...]
|> >it practically melts in your mouth. it has a subtle flavor, and the warm
|> >glaze gets on your fingers, which you then have to lick clean. Heaven on
|> >earth!
|>
|> Time for doughnut snobbery, I see. This crass commercial
|> product you so lovingly describe is the Ford of doughnuts.
|> You, sir, are a ruffian!
|>
|> In the first place, no raised doughnut even deserves that
|> name; the only *real* doughnuts are cakes, and those must
|> (get ready to gasp, veggans) by fried in the freshest lard
|> until they are crispy on the outside. They are best eaten
|> with either ice-cold milk or the sort of black coffee one
|> gets only at my house and *very* few other places (a cafe I
|> know in Amsterdam, for example). If you *must* have
|> something on them, plain powdered sugar is the limit of
|> that, no glazes and *no* chocolate (which completely
|> overwhelms the doughnut's *own* taste)!
|>
No! The best way of all is served with a little tumbler of warm Maple
Syrup for dunking. Simply heaven.
--
************************************************
*Ann B. Carlson (car...@ab00.larc.nasa.gov) * O .
*MS 366 * o _///_ //
*NASA Langley Research Center * <`)= _<<
*Hampton, VA 23665-5225 * \\\ \\
*(804) 864-7050 *
************************************************
Jack Hamilton
Anderson) writes:
>
>A rare thing: I'm speechless.
From jealousy?
>>THis morning, fate awarded me with a perfect doughnut, [...]
>>The difference between a freshly glazed doughnut, still warm, [...]
>>it practically melts in your mouth. it has a subtle flavor, and the warm
>>glaze gets on your fingers, which you then have to lick clean. Heaven on
>>earth!
>
>Time for doughnut snobbery, I see. This crass commercial
>product you so lovingly describe is the Ford of doughnuts.
>You, sir, are a ruffian!
Snobbery is right! Are you saying that the pleasures of the working class
are somehow less worthwhile than those of the elite? Is the rich man's
opera better than the poor man's opera?
>In the first place, no raised doughnut even deserves that
>name; the only *real* doughnuts are cakes, and those must
>(get ready to gasp, veggans) by fried in the freshest lard
>until they are crispy on the outside.
This doughnut was crispy on the outside (underneath the warm glaze) and
soft inside. Yes, the crust is important.
>They are best eaten
>with either ice-cold milk or the sort of black coffee one
>gets only at my house and *very* few other places (a cafe I
>know in Amsterdam, for example).
Personally, I like my coffee like I like my men - sweet, with cream.
>If you *must* have
>something on them, plain powdered sugar is the limit of
>that, no glazes
You're simply wrong there, of course.
>and *no* chocolate (which completely
>overwhelms the doughnut's *own* taste)!
But you're right about that. Chocolate addicts may like that kind of
thing, but not chocolate lovers.
Jeff Dauber
>In article <1992Feb26....@macc.wisc.edu> ande...@macc.wisc.edu (Jess
>Anderson) writes:
>>
>>A rare thing: I'm speechless.
>
>From jealousy?
>
No, from pity... I bet you paid all sorts of money for that lava lamp
of yours, and you got one of the new ones, rather than a vintage lamp
(which are far superior in performance than the new ones).
Now I bought my lavalamp for 25 cents at a garage sale 12 years ago. Since
then, many lava lamps have passed through my hands, and still the best one,
and at this point, my only one, is my 25 cent garage sale special.
sigh....
You do know not to ever turn them off, despite what the instructions
say?
ObUsefulLavaLampHint: the bulbs in lava lamps are 40 watt refrigerator
bulbs.
FWA
Tim Pierce
>In the first place, no raised doughnut even deserves that
>name; the only *real* doughnuts are cakes, and those must
>(get ready to gasp, veggans)
English peddants, too?
>by fried in the freshest lard
>until they are crispy on the outside.
I prefer fresh-baked doughnuts, even of the American variety, to
anything packaged, but when the time is right, nothing beats a hot
fresh lump of fried dough (how proletariat!) from a vendor in
Greenwich Village. I *do* miss NY sometimes ...
--
____ Tim Pierce / Although "nelly" always refers to men, I never
\ / pie...@husc.harvard.edu / met one who *liked* being called nelly, and
\/ (aka twpi...@amherst.edu) / the ones who *are* nelly like it least of all,
I think. -- Jess Anderson
jgl...@ducvax.auburn.edu
[Lava lamps deleted]
> The difference between a freshly glazed doughnut, still warm, and a
> doughnut which has gotten cold, is much greater than the difference
> between, say, fresh-squeezed orange juice and canned orange juice. A fresh
> warm doughnut is the softest, most delicate food you will ever encounter.
> it practically melts in your mouth. it has a subtle flavor, and the warm
> glaze gets on your fingers, which you then have to lick clean. Heaven on
> earth!
Oh Jack, you're such a tease. My mouth is just watering right now.
You're talking about Krispy Kreme donuts; delicacy of delicacies,
delight of delights!
ObMotss: I've often thought that, on pure sensuality and ecstasy
scale, warm donuts compare very favorably to sex. Now if the two
could just be combined.... Wait, they can! ;-) Mmmmmmmmmm.....
- Jay,
who, if he can't go home Friday nights with a person, will
sometimes settle for just baked donuts.
Jess Anderson
In article <1992Feb26....@ducvax.auburn.edu>
jgl...@ducvax.auburn.edu writes:
> - Jay,
>who, if he can't go home Friday nights with a person, will
>sometimes settle for just baked donuts.
Well, I've seen a little kink in my day, but you're the first
*I* ever heard of who goes home with donuts!
To be sure, I have heard of people going home with
madeleines, (god knows!) with cream puffs, with various old
rolls (but not with day-old ones, don't want the
child-sex-role squad to accuse us of things we'd never think
of), with petits-fours, with poppy seeds I very much doubt
(though I love hayseeds), and some of the truly degenerate
even with crullers in their hair.
I myself went home with a Berliner once.
Nelson Minar
>ObUsefulLavaLampHint: the bulbs in lava lamps are 40 watt refrigerator
>bulbs.
thank you! thank you thank you! Now, can you tell me - are they
frosted or clear 40 watt bulbs? (for the uninitiated, it matters
because lava lamps work by the heat generated from the bulb, so the
bulb has to be just right). Since my first lamp bulb burned out, I
haven't gotten an effective replacement.
Does anyone know if it's possible to get replacement. wax and oil? I'm
told you can get it in different colours. Not only am I tired of the
red/yellow, but the yellow is cloudy.
I'm ashamed to admit I only have a nouveau lava lamp, the $60 variety.
I certainly didn't buy it - someone thought it would be cute to give
Nelson a hippy artifact before he went to the hippy college, not
realizing I find the whole "hippy" classification offensive (probably
because I fall into it rather nicely).
I did get a garage sale fibre optic lamp, though - little bush of
fibres, light at the bottom, all the fibre-ends glow. A cat managed to
knock it off, burying little fragments of fibre optic in the deep pile
carpet. Not only could I not vacuum them up, but fibres make wonderful
splinters - they go deep in, and they're next to impossible to take
out. I probably still have some in my feet.
ObMotss: "Turn on your lava lite.. red, hot lava"
--
__
nel...@reed.edu \/ You stupid vulgar greedy ugly American death sucker
Rod Williams
>
>To be sure, I have heard of people going home with
>madeleines, (god knows!) with cream puffs, with various old
>rolls (but not with day-old ones, don't want the
>child-sex-role squad to accuse us of things we'd never think
>of), with petits-fours, with poppy seeds I very much doubt
>(though I love hayseeds), and some of the truly degenerate
>even with crullers in their hair.
>
>I myself went home with a Berliner once.
Kaiser?
--
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
rod williams -=- pacific bell -=- san francisco -=- rjw...@pacbell.com
Jeff Dauber
>In article <hit...@fido.asd.sgi.com> dau...@sgi.com (Jeff Dauber) writes:
>>ObUsefulLavaLampHint: the bulbs in lava lamps are 40 watt refrigerator
>>bulbs.
>
>thank you! thank you thank you! Now, can you tell me - are they
>frosted or clear 40 watt bulbs?
Clear.
>Does anyone know if it's possible to get replacement. wax and oil? I'm
>told you can get it in different colours. Not only am I tired of the
>red/yellow, but the yellow is cloudy.
Nope, you cannot replace the stuff, for that matter, I don't recommend
even opening up the lamp, it just causes trouble. They way to fix
the cloudiness is to leave the lamp on for several weeks. It eventually
cleans itself up.
FWA
Jack Hamilton
>
>I prefer fresh-baked doughnuts, even of the American variety, to
>anything packaged, but when the time is right, nothing beats a hot
>fresh lump of fried dough (how proletariat!) from a vendor in
>Greenwich Village. I *do* miss NY sometimes ...
When I was in Paris in 1975, I was introduced to beignets, fresh out of the
oil and still warm, with powdered sugar. They were really wonderful. I
ate them with milk, which seemed very un-French, but was delicious anyway.
The last time I was in Paris, I couldn't find any. Have they gone away?
Incidentally, I had some at the Cafe du Monde in New Orleans last year, and
they weren't nearly as good as my memory of the parisian variety.
Jack Hamilton
>
>Well, I've seen a little kink in my day, but you're the first
>*I* ever heard of who goes home with donuts!
What do you think those holes are there for?
>I myself went home with a Berliner once.
I've certainly met a few who thought they were Napoleans.
William Tsun-Yuk Hsu
>jgl...@ducvax.auburn.edu writes:
>> - Jay,
>>who, if he can't go home Friday nights with a person, will
>>sometimes settle for just baked donuts.
>Well, I've seen a little kink in my day, but you're the first
>*I* ever heard of who goes home with donuts!
Jess, that's a euphemism for hanging out at the Dunkin' Donuts at
Belmont and Clark in Chicago after the bars close at 5am, looking
incredibly depressed and vulnerable, and nibbling coyly on delectable
chunks of lard and sugar. It is quite possible that a nice man (or
a skatepunk) will sweep you off your feet in his limo (or skateboard)
and you'll live happily ever after (till the sun rises, at least).
Remind me to take you sometime...
Bill
Rod Williams
>When I was in Paris in 1975, I was introduced to beignets, fresh out of the
>oil and still warm, with powdered sugar. They were really wonderful. I
>ate them with milk, which seemed very un-French, but was delicious anyway.
>
>The last time I was in Paris, I couldn't find any. Have they gone away?
Ou sont les beignets d'antan? ;-)
Jess Anderson
In article <1992Feb27.2...@PacBell.COM>
rjw...@PacBell.COM (Rod Williams) writes:
>Ou sont les beignets d'antan? ;-)
But, arguably the most important word in that line
is the one you omitted:
Mais, ou sont les beignets d'antan?
>--
>=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
>rod williams -=- pacific bell -=- san francisco -=- rjw...@pacbell.com
Jess Anderson
In article <ybnhn...@netcom.com> j...@netcom.com (Jack
Hamilton) writes:
>In article <1992Feb27....@macc.wisc.edu> ande...@macc.wisc.edu (Jess
>Anderson) writes:
>>I myself went home with a Berliner once.
>I've certainly met a few who thought they were Napoleans.
Serves you right for surveying your underparts with that
handmirror.
Jess Anderson
In article <1992Feb27.1...@PacBell.COM>
rjw...@PacBell.COM (Rod Williams) writes:
>Kaiser?
No need to be formal; just call me Jess.
Rod Williams
>> rjw...@PacBell.COM (Rod Williams) writes:
>>Ou sont les beignets d'antan? ;-)
>
>But, arguably the most important word in that line
>is the one you omitted:
>
>Mais, ou sont les beignets d'antan?
Mais, juins, novembres -- je m'en fou.
Jess Anderson
In article <1992Feb27.2...@PacBell.COM>
rjw...@PacBell.COM (Rod Williams) writes:
>> ande...@macc.wisc.edu (Jess Anderson) writes:
>>> rjw...@PacBell.COM (Rod Williams) writes:
>>>Ou sont les beignets d'antan? ;-)
>>But, arguably the most important word in that line
>>is the one you omitted:
>>Mais, ou sont les beignets d'antan?
>Mais, juins, novembres -- je m'en fou.
Mais, avoine et orge perl'e d'ailleurs?
Mary Shafer
In article <hit...@fido.asd.sgi.com> dau...@sgi.com (Jeff Dauber) writes:
>ObUsefulLavaLampHint: the bulbs in lava lamps are 40 watt refrigerator
>bulbs.
thank you! thank you thank you! Now, can you tell me - are they
frosted or clear 40 watt bulbs? (for the uninitiated, it matters
because lava lamps work by the heat generated from the bulb, so the
bulb has to be just right). Since my first lamp bulb burned out, I
haven't gotten an effective replacement.
I did get a garage sale fibre optic lamp, though - little bush of
fibres, light at the bottom, all the fibre-ends glow. A cat managed to
knock it off, burying little fragments of fibre optic in the deep pile
carpet. Not only could I not vacuum them up, but fibres make wonderful
splinters - they go deep in, and they're next to impossible to take
out. I probably still have some in my feet.
Well, how about a bulb hint for a fibre optic lamp? I still have mine
(no garage sales for 60s tat at my house) but the lamp burned out
about 5 years ago. It seems to be a large flash light type bulb,
with a bayonet mount. Does someone know of the ultimate bulb source?
House of Bulbs? Bulbs 'R Us?
--
Mary Shafer DoD #0362 KotFR NASA Dryden Flight Research Facility, Edwards, CA
sha...@rigel.dfrf.nasa.gov Of course I don't speak for NASA
"There's no kill like a guns kill." LCDR "Hoser" Satrapa, gunnery instructor
"A kill is a kill." Anonymous
Gene Ward Smith
>I myself went home with a Berliner once.
Did he say "Ich bin ein Berliner" when you were introduced?
--
Gene Ward Smith/Brahms Gang/CICMA/Concordia University
gsm...@concour.cs.concordia.ca
Jess Anderson
In article <27...@daily-planet.concordia.ca>
gsm...@concour.cs.concordia.ca (Gene Ward Smith) writes:
>In article <1992Feb27....@macc.wisc.edu>
>ande...@macc.wisc.edu (Jess Anderson) writes:
>>I myself went home with a Berliner once.
>Did he say "Ich bin ein Berliner" when you were introduced?
We weren't introduced.
jgl...@ducvax.auburn.edu
>
> In article <1992Feb26....@ducvax.auburn.edu>
> jgl...@ducvax.auburn.edu writes:
>
>> - Jay,
>>who, if he can't go home Friday nights with a person, will
>>sometimes settle for just baked donuts.
>
> Well, I've seen a little kink in my day, but you're the first
> *I* ever heard of who goes home with donuts!
Well, Jess. It's donuts or twinkies. Of the two, I certainly prefer
donuts because they are fresher and much, much tastier. However,
donuts don't have the artificial preservatives that twinkies
have and, therefore, have a much shorter shelf-life.
I also appreciate the spirituality of donuts, too; they're all
so.... well, you know ... holy.
Now, my favorite oral fixation just might be the most sinful
confection of all. I think for pure pleasure, nothing beats
a creme-filled horn. Yummmmmmm. ;-)
- Jay
PS. Knowing the tastes of some motsseurs, I presume it won't be
long before someone argues the merits of bear claws.
Jack Hamilton
writes:
>
>Now, my favorite oral fixation just might be the most sinful
>confection of all. I think for pure pleasure, nothing beats
>a creme-filled horn. Yummmmmmm. ;-)
I'd like to put in a word for pralines as well. It's a good thing I don't
live in New Orleans, where I could have a constant supply. I have no
problem eating half a dozen at a sitting. I can sit pretty often, too.
John Dorrance
> In the first place, no raised doughnut even deserves that
> name; the only *real* doughnuts are cakes, and those must
> (get ready to gasp, veggans) by fried in the freshest lard
> until they are crispy on the outside. They are best eaten
> with either ice-cold milk or the sort of black coffee one
> gets only at my house and *very* few other places (a cafe I
> know in Amsterdam, for example). If you *must* have
> something on them, plain powdered sugar is the limit of
> that, no glazes and *no* chocolate (which completely
> overwhelms the doughnut's *own* taste)!
*Whimper* I guess this rules out frosting and sprinkles?
John, who /must/ have effeminate donuts, and who was so moved by the
original post that he's going to have to put some clothes on and fetch
some donuts at the shop down the street.
---
John Dorrance ** Spin Squid and the Squid Squad **
"How do you say... delicious? Delovely? Delectable? Devine?
How do you say... deGORGEOUS? Dewith-it? Degroovy? Define?
Ooh, la la, la lalalalala!" - Lady Miss Kier, Deee-Lite
Ken Johnson
In article <1992Feb27.1...@csrd.uiuc.edu> h...@sp24.csrd.uiuc.edu
(William Tsun-Yuk Hsu) writes:
# Jess, that's a euphemism for hanging out at the Dunkin' Donuts at
# Belmont and Clark in Chicago after the bars close at 5am, looking
# incredibly depressed and vulnerable, and nibbling coyly on delectable
# chunks of lard and sugar. It is quite possible that a nice man (or a
# skatepunk) will sweep you off your feet in his limo (or skateboard) and
# you'll live happily ever after (till the sun rises, at least).
So that's why Dunkin' Doughnuts opened their first U.K. branch at
Piccadilly Circus. If only I had known when I was last there.
--
//// Ken Johnson, A I Applications Institute
We won't be meeting again //// 80 South Bridge, EDINBURGH EH1 1HN
On the slow train, //// E-mail k...@aiai.ed.ac.uk
On the slow train. //// phone 031-650 2756 fax 031-650 6513
Robert Coren
|> John, who /must/ have effeminate donuts, and who was so moved by the
|> original post that he's going to have to put some clothes on and fetch
Oh, John, is that really necessary? (Hmm... Nebraska -- February -- I
guess it really is...)