Five of the best: Male Sex Toys to really get off on
AutoBlow
some of the best selling sex toys for men.
The Dream Sleeve
Not a bad sensation at all. The sheath, or sleeve as they like to call
it, is made from Futorotic material, don’t know what it is, but it
feels clingy and grasping on your cock. The pussy does feel pretty
much like the real thing. The sleeve actually warms to your body
temperature as you stroke away, and if you add a drop or two of lube
it’s a very smooth ride.
The Thriller
This male sex toy is an ice blue erection ring designed for solo use
and with your partner. It looks kinda complicated, but basically you
wrap the larger ring around the testicles and the snugger one around
your cock. Switch on the pulsating vibrator bullet and every inch of
your shaft is vibrating. Wild!
Sapphire Seductress
We tried this male sex toy because the name does have some allure.
The heart-shaped point of entry yields to a soft textured interior,
made all the better with the addition of some lube. It’s as clingy as
the Dream Sleeve and the ribbing inside gives an extra sensation. It
certainly did produce a pretty intense orgasm. Could do with being a
bit longer for the bigger boys, but on the whole, nice going,
Seductress!
Tenga
This is a male sex toy from Japan. It’s a pre-lubricated sleeve lined
with a variety of textures and numerous pleasure nubs. Entry is ultra-
smooth and then there’s a superb sense of adhesion as you pull out.
Great ride, but it can get expensive as it’s a once only deal.
Autoblow
This is the first fully automatic blowjob machine, a male sex toy for
those into a little tonsil tickling. Lube up and slip the cylinder
over your cock. The silicone sleeve inside grips you as motor driven
micro beads power up and down, pressing and pulling your cock to an
explosive climax which you can control with the variable speed
settings.
naebad
Ok so now we have Piper pretending to sell sex-toys. Whatever next.
Will he never give up?
Naebad
Adam Whyte-Settlar
"AutoBlow" <lxl...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:78554046-c2ff-4de3...@j4g2000yqe.googlegroups.com...
We set ourselves the difficult, not to say exhausting task of testing
some of the best selling sex toys for men.
Not a lot of point posting that in a UK group.
Having sex with an inanimate object, such as a bicycle for example, is
illegal here.
The Phantom Piper
>
> Not a lot of point posting that in a UK group.
> Having sex with an inanimate object, such as a bicycle
> for example, is illegal here.
Why do you think I remain in the States?
Years ago, I became infatuated with a sweet little
Krups Coffeemaker - but it turned out that she was
underaged (which I discovered far too late!), so our
budding love was doomed. As I grew older I found
solace and meaning in many torrid affairs: a pretty
coin counting machine (who, unfortunately, was far
too Materialistic for me), a real beauty of a parking
meter (but people seemed to disapprove of our trysts,
for some reason known only within their own narrow
minds), a gymnastic and enthusiastic Photographic
Tripod from Japan (but of course there were the usual
language difficulties, and she eventually broke under
the strain). Finally, I settled down with my beloved
Soulmate, with whom I've been ever since. Here's
a photo of her:
http://www.portablegadget.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/hetty1.jpg
She doesn't say much most of the time, but she's
always there when I need her - and she's possessed
of an ability which all men treasure and appreciate...
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
...she keeps the place spotless.
Romantically,
The Phantom Piper
conwaycaine
"Adam Whyte-Settlar" <ador@ble> wrote in message
news:m8udnajZA_kkvWnX...@westnet.com.au...
Would that include English women???
deem...@aol.com
Only in public......besides, since when do men need sex toys?
(Just sayin')
deem...@aol.com
wrote:
Now, that was pretty darn funny!
Custos Custodum
807b-3f8...@m38g2000yqd.googlegroups.com:
Nope. You can't even do it behind a locked door when there are nosy
cleaners about.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/glasgow_and_west/7095134.stm
Adam Whyte-Settlar
"The Phantom Piper" <ThePhan...@comcast.net> wrote in message
news:5b083cac-80ec-48f5...@j9g2000prh.googlegroups.com...
http://www.portablegadget.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/hetty1.jpg
?
Good housekeeping?
Adam Whyte-Settlar
"conwaycaine" <conwa...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message
news:XuWdncF0rt_Ep2nX...@giganews.com...
No - apparently women are free to have sex with any inanimate object that
takes their fancy.
More evidence that sexism is rife here - and it's not just in Inverness.
Check out this little beauty.
http://www.ectomo.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/vibratorslide_2.jpg
"...The first electric vibrator, invented by a British doctor [where else?]
in the 1880s in order to facilitate vulvular massage, an accepted form of
treatment for those diagnosed with hysteria (now referred to as Histrionic
Personality Disorder) and neurasthenia. It allowed doctors of the time to
facilitate many more patients than had been able when the procedure was
performed manually and brought some patients to "hysterical paroxysm" in as
little as ten minutes..."
Of course the Americans just HAD to build a bigger one.
http://www.ioncinema.com/old/images/user/news_3709_user_19600.jpg
Adam Whyte-Settlar
<deem...@aol.com> wrote in message
news:a510195f-d252-4a06...@m38g2000yqd.googlegroups.com...
On Nov 6, 8:12 am, "Adam Whyte-Settlar" <ador@ble> wrote:
> "AutoBlow" <lxl...@gmail.com> wrote in message
>
> news:78554046-c2ff-4de3...@j4g2000yqe.googlegroups.com...
> We set ourselves the difficult, not to say exhausting task of testing
> some of the best selling sex toys for men.
>
> Not a lot of point posting that in a UK group.
> Having sex with an inanimate object, such as a bicycle for example, is
> illegal here.
Only in public......
Nope - in private too. And even if the bicycle is a willing participant.
"...Robert Stewart was discovered in his room by two cleaners at the Aberley
House Hostel in Ayr, south west Scotland, in October last year.
On Wednesday Mr Stewart admitted to sexual breach of the peace in Ayr
Sheriff Court, where depute fiscal Gail Davidson described how he had been
found by the hostel workers.
She said: "They knocked on the door several times and there was no reply.
"They used a master key to unlock the door and they then observed the
accused wearing only a white T-shirt, naked from the waist down.
"The accused was holding the bike and moving his hips back and forth as if
to simulate sex."
Both witnesses, who were extremely shocked, notified the hotel manager, who
in turn alerted the police.
Mr Stewart was placed on the sex offenders' register but his sentence was
deferred until next month...."
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1567410/Man-who-had-sex-with-bike-in-court.html
Adam Whyte-Settlar
"The Phantom Piper" <ThePhan...@comcast.net> wrote in message
news:5b083cac-80ec-48f5...@j9g2000prh.googlegroups.com...
>
> Not a lot of point posting that in a UK group.
> Having sex with an inanimate object, such as a bicycle
> for example, is illegal here.
Why do you think I remain in the States?
Finally, I settled down with my beloved
Soulmate, with whom I've been ever since. Here's
a photo of her:
http://www.portablegadget.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/hetty1.jpg
At least you're a real man - not like this pervert.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1580535/Worker-caught-having-sex-with-Henry-Hoover.html.
Disgusting faggot.
Adam Whyte-Settlar
"Custos Custodum" <m...@privacy.net> wrote in message
news:hd27q1$cfo$1...@news.eternal-september.org...
Oooops - you beat to it.
That was going to be MY punchline.
This guy DID do it in public - ****ing weirdo.
"....A 32-year-old man has been arrested in Wiltshire for allegedly
simulating a sex act with a lamp-post..."
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1580535/Worker-caught-having-sex-with-Henry-Hoover.html
Got to admit she IS a real looker though A bit on the tall side perhaps but
check those hips.
deem...@aol.com
> <deemsb...@aol.com> wrote in message
So, I guess "inflatable ladies" would be illegal, too?
The Phantom Piper
>
> At least you're a real man - not like this pervert.
>
That's my Hetty's ex!
> Disgusting faggot.
I reckon the strain of the breakup turned `im queer;
happens all the time, so I'm told...
Perfectly Normal,
The Phantom Piper
The Phantom Piper
>
> "....A 32-year-old man has been arrested in Wiltshire for allegedly
> simulating a sex act with a lamp-post..."
Allow me:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1580899/Man-arrested-for-having-sex-with-lamp-post.html
> Got to admit she IS a real looker though A bit on the tall side perhaps but
> check those hips.
Hey Meester: Feelthy Peectures Of My Lamppost?,
The Phantom Piper
conwaycaine
"Adam Whyte-Settlar" <ador@ble> wrote in message
>>> Having sex with an inanimate object, such as a bicycle for example, is
>>> illegal here.
>>
>> Would that include English women???
>
> No - apparently women are free to have sex with any inanimate object that
> takes their fancy.
> More evidence that sexism is rife here - and it's not just in Inverness.
The joke was that could English women be classified as inanimate objects.
I'm wasting my time here.
The doldrums have set in and everyone is eaten up with a fatal case of
seriousness.
The Phantom Piper
>
> The joke was that could English women be classified as inanimate objects.
I got it. It was one of your better ones.
Despite the existence and provenance of "dogging."
Then there's this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dcCoO6yjFVw
Man, She Was Hawt!,
The Phantom Piper
Adam Whyte-Settlar
>
> "Adam Whyte-Settlar" <ador@ble> wrote in message
> news:MKmdnfIx2Y0JW2nX...@westnet.com.au...
>> "conwaycaine" <conwa...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message
>>>>
>>>> Not a lot of point posting that in a UK group.
>>>> Having sex with an inanimate object, such as a bicycle for example, is
>>>> illegal here.
>>>
>>> Would that include English women???
>>
>> No - apparently women are free to have sex with any inanimate object that
>> takes their fancy.
>> More evidence that sexism is rife here - and it's not just in Inverness.
>
>
> The joke was that could English women be classified as inanimate objects.
[groan]
I KNOW that you moron - and *my* joke was pretending not to understand.
I don't know why I bother honestly. I have to explain them every bloody time
with you yanks.
Adam Whyte-Settlar
Allow me:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1580899/Man-arrested-for-having-sex-with-lamp-post.html
Oooops - don't know how that happened. But yes - that was the link I meant
to post.
Adam Whyte-Settlar
<deem...@aol.com> wrote in message
news:858f095d-b0c9-4660...@w19g2000yqk.googlegroups.com...
Well - that was kind of my point.
It's got to be just about the most ridiculous verdict I've ever heard of.
I mean where do you draw the line. What if he was having sex with an
inflatable doll whilst sitting on a bicycle?
Would that be illegal or would he have to be sitting on an inflatable doll
and having sex with a bicycle to end up in jail.
And how come it's legal for women?
deem...@aol.com
> <deemsb...@aol.com> wrote in message
>
> news:858f095d-b0c9-4660...@w19g2000yqk.googlegroups.com...
> On Nov 6, 8:04 pm, "Adam Whyte-Settlar" <ador@ble> wrote:
>
> > Mr Stewart was placed on the sex offenders' register but his sentence was
> > deferred until next month...."
>
> >http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1567410/Man-who-had-sex-with-b...
>
> So, I guess "inflatable ladies" would be illegal, too?
>
> Well - that was kind of my point.
> It's got to be just about the most ridiculous verdict I've ever heard of.
Can he appeal?
>
> I mean where do you draw the line. What if he was having sex with an
> inflatable doll whilst sitting on a bicycle?
> Would that be illegal or would he have to be sitting on an inflatable doll
> and having sex with a bicycle to end up in jail.
>
> And how come it's legal for women?
I've heard of women and bicycle seats...but never bicycles :-)
The Phantom Piper
>
>> On Nov 6, 8:04 pm, "Adam Whyte-Settlar" <ador@ble> wrote:
>
Pretty obviously not to women...
*BaDaRumPum*!
>> And how come it's legal for women?
They're the "Fairer Sex."
*PaChaaaang*!
Getting A Two-Fer Out Of It,
The Phantom Piper
Adam Whyte-Settlar
<deem...@aol.com> wrote in message
news:4f08d430-dc96-4782...@j24g2000yqa.googlegroups.com...
On Nov 6, 11:27 pm, "Adam Whyte-Settlar" <ador@ble> wrote:
> <deemsb...@aol.com> wrote in message
>
> news:858f095d-b0c9-4660...@w19g2000yqk.googlegroups.com...
> On Nov 6, 8:04 pm, "Adam Whyte-Settlar" <ador@ble> wrote:
>
> > Mr Stewart was placed on the sex offenders' register but his sentence
> > was
> > deferred until next month...."
>
> >http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1567410/Man-who-had-sex-with-b...
>
> So, I guess "inflatable ladies" would be illegal, too?
>
> Well - that was kind of my point.
> It's got to be just about the most ridiculous verdict I've ever heard of.
Can he appeal?
I think that's everyones right - so long as you've got plenty of money of
course and, in his case, don't mind your sexual mores being headline news
for weeks.
But he was found guilty and, IIRC, he got three years probation. Which means
his poor bike is going to have to find someone else to ride it I guess.
But seriously - absolutely shocking that it ever went to trial let alone
being found 'guilty' of whatever the hell it was he was found 'guilty' of.
conwaycaine
"Adam Whyte-Settlar" <ador@ble> wrote in message
This does seem to be your defense when you miss one of my rip snorters.
Adam Whyte-Settlar
Trust me on this one Conway.
I'm the first to admit I have an infinite number of character flaws, but an
underdeveloped sense of humour is most definitely not one of them.
If I say I got it then I got it. I mean what are the odds? A British (and
part world-famous Scottish at that!) sense of humour not picking up on
primitive US kindergarten slapstick.
Please.... Give me a ****ing break. You might be excellent at bombing the
wrong countries, but witty? You aren't.
conwaycaine
"Adam Whyte-Settlar" <ador@ble> wrote in message
BHAWAWAWAWAW!!!!!!!!!!!