Sawney Beane - A portrait
Steve Graham
As Sawney seems unwilling to divulge his real identity to us all, I
though it not unreasonable that we construct an image and persona for
him - the better to allow us to envisage who (or what) is sitting at the
other end of the line (Hmm - maybe "other (meaning bottom) end of the
food chain" would be more suitable, however I digress).
Anyway, for what it is worth, here is how I envisage the sadster :-
Sawney (Has)Beane
Real Name: Dork McShitstabber
Age: mid to late forties
Appearance: Ugly - real ugly. Short, fat and balding with two beady red
rimmed little eyes myopically peering (in different directions) from
beneath grimy horn rimmed glasses.
Expression: Lopsided sneer, twitching left nostril, permanently furrowed
narrow brow.
Educational Achievements: Typical product of the Americentric education
system - a few of pieces of paper with grandiose names, little common
sense or practical abilities.
Employment Status: Unemployed (unemployable?). May once have been a
stoker, considering how well he "shovels it" on here.
Social Skills: None whatsoever. Doesn't get out much - but then, I think
we all guessed that.
Family: None that'll admit to it, unless of course you include the other
inmates.
Smell: Repulsive - think milk curdling for three months on a bed of
fly-blown, maggot ridden mutton.
Clothing: "The stuff Oxfam rejects" is probably a fair assesment.
Attitude: Intoxicated by the exuberance of his own verbosity.
Intolerant, egocentric cynicism masking a deep rooted lack of personal
esteem.
I wish I had the time to continue, but alas work presses. Anyone else
like to add to this?
Regards
Steve Graham
sys...@hotmail.com
http://www.geocities.com/Yosemite/1837/
Craig Hardie
Steve Graham wrote in article <3429B6...@hotmail.com>...
<snip: funny stuff>
>I wish I had the time to continue, but alas work presses. Anyone else
>like to add to this?
>
>Regards
>Steve Graham
When I read one of Sawney's flames I always picture Beavis or Butthead
in my mind: "I'll call him a wanker, that'll show him (yuk, yuk, yuk... )."
Craig
Steve Graham
Hmmm - an atrophied and aged Butthead, bent by the weight of all those
unemployment cheques, microbrain further befuddled by decades of bad
whisk(e)y and substance abuse (not to mention self abuse) - you may
actually have something there.
MagaidhS
I am quite sure that Sawney is getting a kick out of your "portrait" of
him. I find this...as always..quite amusing.
Always the same,
Maggie Stewart
Sawney Beane
On Wed, 24 Sep 1997 12:44:25 +0100, "Craig Hardie"
<cha...@jungle.bt.co.uk> wrote:
>
>When I read one of Sawney's flames I always picture Beavis or Butthead
>in my mind: "I'll call him a wanker, that'll show him (yuk, yuk, yuk... )."
You have a mind?!? Oh, sorry...
Funny, when I read one of *your* posts, I always picture a
septic-tank.
Hardie-Har-Har,
---Sawney Beane
MagaidhS
>Hmmm - an atrophied and aged Butthead, bent by the weight of all those
>unemployment cheques, microbrain further befuddled by decades of bad
>whisk(e)y and substance abuse (not to mention self abuse) - you may
>actually have something there.
More or less what I thought you might have been like, Steve, and maybe
even Craig, as well...hmmmmm.....
--Maggie Stewart
Sawney Beane
On Wed, 24 Sep 1997 17:55:36 -0700, Steve Graham <sys...@hotmail.com>
wrote:
>
>Anyway, for what it is worth, here is how I envisage the sadster :-
>
>
>Real Name: Stephen Graham
>
>Age: About 30 (pretends to be much older and wiser).
>
>Appearance: A rather blocky, squarish head with a prognathous jaw
>covered by hair a la Herman Munster. Thick glasses worn to magnify
>the natural beadiness of his eyes. Thick and indelicate hands hanging
>to well below the knees.
>
>Expression: Mildly deranged.
>
>Educational Achievements: None.
>
>Employment Status: May once have been a stroker, considering
>how he short strokes it here.
>
>Social Skills: Stalker - Likes to "meet people." Would-be paparazzo.
>
>Family: Manson. Wife resembles Squeaky Fromme. Children
>fathered by different milkmen; no family-resemblance to S.G.
>
>Smell: Like the pig that he is.
>
>Clothing: Looks out-of-place and ill at ease in the kilt; a poseur.
>
>Attitude: Presumptuous; masks ignorance with foolish guesswork.
The Wit And Wisdom Of Steve Graham:
Okay, the _Collected_Writings_ of Steve Graham:
>As Sawney seems unwilling to divulge his real identity to us all,
This from a "Hotmail" client. Tell me, Stevie: does Fiona post the
"Personal" adverts to alt.kinky.fetishes, or do you?
>Intolerant, egocentric cynicism masking a deep rooted lack of personal
>esteem.
This from *YOU*? *ROTFLSHIND*!!!
>I wish I had the time to continue, but alas work presses.
Yes, and I *would* like fries with that, Stevie-boyo.
>Anyone else like to add to this?
Oh, I may come back now and again to help "flush out" the portrait, as
it were...
Say Hi To The Kids,
---Sawney Beane
Craig Hardie
What is Sawney Beane,a person who enjoys the thought of upsetting others.
That's not a guess, as his behaviour demonstrates, he admits it in his
postings. For example:
Sawney Beane wrote in article <3423bab8...@news.pacbell.net>
>What ho! A perceptive brow, furrowed over the keyboard? "Sawney"
>seems to cheese-`em even more than "Hagbard" did. I may keep him.
How does he go about his mission - largely by spouting racist bile in
the guise of nationalism, but mainly by hurling abuse at anyone who
tries to engage him in debate. As Paul Sammy has found out, he goes
to remarkable lengths to avoid any real debate.
He has a stock set of insults, calling people wankers, echoing their
posts and playing with their names. However, Sawney is a sensitive
chap. It seems that others insults can bruise his sensitive ego, when
this happens he collects the insult so that he can later use it against
others. Unfortunately for Sawney, he has not yet grasped that an
effective put down needs to be fine tuned to the target. Here's an
example of him recycling insults:
Steve Graham wrote in article <3416C4...@hotmail.com>
>Sawney,You're a sad strange little man, and you have my sympathy.
Sawney Beane wrote in article <34442ebe...@news.pacbell.net>...
>You are a very sad little man, aren't you?
<stuff snipped>
>You have my pity.
>
>Amused,
> ---Sawney Beane
>
Now that is truly how I perceive Sawney, and I am ashamed that I
have gotten myself into a flame war with him. I apologise to the
adults in the group, and I will try to act like one in future. If
anyone wants to reply to this posting could they do so by email,
I don't want to continue bothering the group with this nonsense.
Sincerely
Craig
Steve Graham
Sawney Beane wrote:
>
> On Fri, 26 Sep 1997 08:35:39 -0700, Steve Graham <sys...@hotmail.com>
> wrote:
> >
> >Please try to be original in future, you're boring me.
>
> Well, then Stevie: run along play with the little coloured blocks;
> *that's* right - all better now? That's my boy!
>
> Bye-Bye, Baby,
> ---Sawney Beane
Can't ever get the coloured blocks off of Fraser I'm afraid.
Regards
Steve Graham
MagaidhS wrote:
>
> > I'll settle for saying you probably
> >"know" him well (in the biblical sense).
>
> Tsk tsk tsk...one track mind. We can honestly say that I have not ever
> been that close to Sawney.
Lucky you.
>
> >Being serious (I can be occasionally), I can't say I'm surprised that
> >the Welsh vote on devolution was so close as I remain unconvinced of the
> >economics of an Welsh state. As for the Welsh being sober, I doubt many
> >of them can afford a decent bevvy!
>
> I agree with you on that. I have never thought of the Welsh as being
> able or willing to rule themselves. I honestly thought of them more as
> the rightful citizens of the UK while Scotland and Ireland should be
> independent. (And as far as a decent bevvy is concerned...what's up with
> American beer, anyway????)
As someone who spent a year living in Munich, I believe I have some
experience of the subject. Therefore I'd have to say that most American
beer is basically piss (Rolling Rock's not bad though).
>
> >(One more point, were you having a problem with your "." key at the
> >start of this post, as it seems to be sticking? I suggest five minutes
> >with a sledge hammer might fix it -
>
> OK, Steve. I *promise* I will stop indicating that blonde pause-to-think
> thing that I do.
>
> >Finally, isn't it boring always being the same?
>
> Ummmmm...that would be a "no". The boyfriend doesn't seem to think so.
> :-)
Now you're boasting. Careful - you'll get Sawney excited.
>And by saying I'm always the same, I mean that I am who I am without
> following anyone else's style.
Indeed.
>
> >Regards
> >Steve Graham (making no aol cracks you will note)
>
> Thank you for not making AOL cracks. I appreciate that. :-)
Ok - being an AOLer you probably wouldn't have understood them anyway...
>
> Always unpredictable, (like that better?)
No - too predictable a reply.
> Maggie Stewart
Steve Graham
I suppose with your mind it'd be hard to picture anything other than a
septic tank....
Steve Graham
Sawney Beane wrote:
>
> On Wed, 24 Sep 1997 17:55:36 -0700, Steve Graham <sys...@hotmail.com>
> wrote:
> >
> >Anyway, for what it is worth, here is how I envisage the sadster :-
> >
> >sys...@hotmail.com
> >
> >Real Name: Stephen Graham
> >
> >Age: About 30 (pretends to be much older and wiser).
Not far off: 29 actually (not 30 'til next year). Wisdom doesn't always
come with age (it didn't in your case).
> >
> >Appearance: A rather blocky, squarish head with a prognathous jaw
> >covered by hair a la Herman Munster. Thick glasses worn to magnify
> >the natural beadiness of his eyes. Thick and indelicate hands hanging
> >to well below the knees.
No beard, and I wear really thin contact lenses. My fingers are lithe
and delicate like a painists. Won't comment on the rest (modesty
prevents). Anyone can visit the website and see anyway.
> >
> >Expression: Mildly deranged.
No argument there...
> >
> >Educational Achievements: None.
Wrong again - although the point of me studying Computing, Chemistry,
Physics, Philosophy, Psychology, Management Science and Business Studies
at Stirling Uni (that's in Scotland by the way - to enlighten foreigners
such as yourself) sometimes aludes me.
> >
> >Employment Status: May once have been a stroker, considering
> >how he short strokes it here.
Far be it from we to argue with an expert stroker (or one handed typist)
such as yourself, but I'm an contract computing consultant.
> >
> >Social Skills: Stalker - Likes to "meet people." Would-be paparazzo.
Actually I'm regarded as a bit anti-social. Don't think I'd like to be a
paparazzo, but I'd like to follow in the footsteps of Ansel Adams.
Unfortunately most of my photography is rather crap.
> >
> >Family: Manson. Wife resembles Squeaky Fromme. Children
> >fathered by different milkmen; no family-resemblance to S.G.
I'll pass the sentiments on the missus (even though I've no idea who or
what Squeaky Fromme is. As for the milkman - my wife actually always
seems to prefer out postmen...
> >
> >Smell: Like the pig that he is.
Pig's are actually regarded as amongst the cleanest of the animal
kingdom. At least a lot cleaner than your average cave dweller.
> >
> >Clothing: Looks out-of-place and ill at ease in the kilt; a poseur.
Actually I do own a kilt (do you), and wear it to the occasional formal
do (charities etc) that I am called upon to attend (only two so far this
year - the Watsons parents ball in the Balmoral, and the Rocking Horse
charity do). Unfortunately when I got married I was to poor to buy a
kilt outfit, so the one I'm wearing was hired. The uneasiness comes from
not knowing who wore it last - it could even have been someone like you
(yuck - imagine the stains that would have left)! Not much prospect of
that though - I think I was a 30 waist at the time.
> >
> >Attitude: Presumptuous; masks ignorance with foolish guesswork.
In this case, most would class it as imagination rather than guesswork.
At least I don't try to hide.
>
> The Wit And Wisdom Of Steve Graham:
>
> Okay, the _Collected_Writings_ of Steve Graham:
>
> >As Sawney seems unwilling to divulge his real identity to us all,
>
> This from a "Hotmail" client. Tell me, Stevie: does Fiona post the
> "Personal" adverts to alt.kinky.fetishes, or do you?
Actually I use hotmail from convenience only. As I change clients
regularily, it's useful to have a static email id. As for the personal
adverts, I wouldn't know as I don't subscribe to alt.kinky.fetishes.
Regulars such as yourself would have to enlighten me on that one.
>
> >Intolerant, egocentric cynicism masking a deep rooted lack of personal
> >esteem.
You may be right with the first part, but self esteem has never been a
problem!
>
> This from *YOU*? *ROTFLSHIND*!!!
>
> >I wish I had the time to continue, but alas work presses.
>
> Yes, and I *would* like fries with that, Stevie-boyo.
I'm not very good at cooking - I'd probably burn them. I do a mean
chilli though. Mind you, you'd have to spend some time on the pan
afterwards - instead of puring out your shite on here.
>
> >Anyone else like to add to this?
>
> Oh, I may come back now and again to help "flush out" the portrait, as
> it were...
*L* Oh good - wonder if I'll be the next Nigel then? Hmmm - maybe not, I
am a Nationalist after all.
>
> Say Hi To The Kids,
Will do - I'd certainly never let you do it in person, not with your
criminal record.
> ---Sawney (Has)Beane(s) for Brains.
Alexander Platt
Kinda makes you wish we had a moderater, don't it?
--
Alex Platt
Steve Graham
Maggie,
Wait a minute - are you Sawney's mum? If so, you've even less of a sense
of humour (know what that is?) than he has. Please try to be original in
future, you're boring me.
Regards
MagaidhS
>Wait a minute - are you Sawney's mum? If so, you've even less of a sense
>of humour (know what that is?) than he has. Please try to be original in
>future, you're boring me.
Sawney's mum? Not hardly...too young to be that...perhaps his
sister...but NOT his mum...less of a sense of humour? My darling, you
don't even know...perhaps I might be more original if I had the proper
inspiration...but since I cannot get that inspiration from you...I guess
I'll have to look for it elsewhere....perhaps to the Welshman who referred
to himself and his fellow countrymen as the *sober* Celts as opposed to the
*non* sober Celts, i.e. the Scots and the Irish? Seems as though the man
is of the opinion that just because the Scots and the Irish prefer a bit of
independence this means they are either not serious or drunk all the time.
You take your pick. He was quoted in such a way as to represent all the
Welsh in this matter. What do you think?
Always the same and certainly *not* lacking a sense of humour,
Maggie Stewart
MagaidhS
>I suppose with your mind it'd be hard to picture anything other than a
>septic tank....
>
>
I suppose with *your* mind it would be hard to picture anything other than
Beavis and Butt Head. I've watched that particular show once in my life
and found it rather beneath me...maybe, Steve, that is why I am so lacking
in a sense of humour? I'm not seeing the humour in that sort of drivel...
---Maggie Stewart
MagaidhS
>Wisdom doesn't always
>come with age
We'll wait and see about wisdom in your case, Steve. I'm not seeing it
*just* yet.
>My fingers are lithe
>and delicate like a painists.
So are mine. I was trained to be a concert pianist
.>Wrong again - although the point of me studying Computing, Chemistry,
>Physics, Philosophy, Psychology, Management Science and Business Studies
>at Stirling Uni (that's in Scotland by the way - to enlighten foreigners
>such as yourself) sometimes aludes me.
Impressive course of study...but then I have three degrees to my
credit...the word, by the way is "eludes"...please check your thesaurus for
the correct usage.
>Actually I'm regarded as a bit anti-social.
I'd have to agree with him on this one, Sawney...I think I see that more
than the paparazzo thing...I bet he has a wrinkled mac in his closet.
>Pig's are actually regarded as amongst the cleanest of the animal
>kingdom.
I've seen pig farms in Iowa...no they aren't
.>Actually I do own a kilt (do you), and wear it to the occasional formal
>do (charities etc) that I am called upon to attend (only two so far this
>year - the Watsons parents ball in the Balmoral, and the Rocking Horse
>charity do).
I guess you forgot to add "snobbish boor" to the description, Sawney.
But then the "nouveau riche" are ones for throwing around the latest formal
"dos" they have attended. Old money doesn't act that way.
>In this case, most would class it as imagination rather than guesswork.
Imagination is based on guesswork...six of one, half a dozen of the other...
>At least I don't try to hide.
Maybe you should...
> As for the personal
>adverts, I wouldn't know as I don't subscribe to alt.kinky.fetishes.
That's not what I heard...but then I only get info like that second-hand...
>You may be right with the first part, but self esteem has never been a
>problem!
Self-esteem? Is that what they are calling cocky smartmouth kids these
days...full of self-esteem...I'll have to remember that.
> Mind you, you'd have to spend some time on the pan
>afterwards - instead of puring out your shite on here.
I'd be scared to death to eat that chili...probably made from leftover tripe.
>*L* Oh good - wonder if I'll be the next Nigel then? Hmmm - maybe not, I
>am a Nationalist after all.
The next Nigel? Ohhhh, I don't think you're good enough.
>Will do - I'd certainly never let you do it in person, not with your
>criminal record.
I would consider it an honour for my children to know Sawney Beane. He
has more character and spunk in his little finger than most do in their
whole bodies.
Always the same, boring or not,
Maggie Stewart
pete
Steve Graham wrote:
>
> Actually I do own a kilt (do you), and wear it to the occasional formal
> do (charities etc) that I am called upon to attend (only two so far this
> year - the Watsons parents ball in the Balmoral, and the Rocking Horse
29, and you already have a child at Watson's? Didn't hang around did
you??
Or can anyone who has their name down on the list for when the sprog
arrives
attend??
pete
Jon Croft
This seemed like a good place for this....
>Do you know, Charles, that I have *deliberately* _avoided_ reading any
>messages in this thread because I was *sure* that some putty-headed,
>bollock-brained cretin was going to make the exactly the mistake which
>you just corrected - and having been involved in a dual-flamewar
>upgroup which has consumed all my energy I didn't want to deal with
>it. Now Nigel's gone and I thought, "Surely, what with this thread
>having lasted days already, no one is going to have made that
>dreadfully ignorant error, *surely*..."
>[*sigh*]
>Makes one rather wish the catastrophists were correct, doesn't it?
>Killing Brain Cells
>(So I Can Be One With Mankind),
---Sawney Beane
Sawney....
Thanks for your * friendly* reply to my post seeking
help on a possible trip to Scotland for New Years eve
1999\2000. Maybe I should not have posted this question
here as it seems to be a rather serious group, but
the level of boorish sniping over something as
mundane as to when to have a party seems rather absurd.
I am not angry at you or the other posters, just a little
disappointed. This kind of response to a genuine appeal for
help, particularly one that crosses cultrural boundries,
is exactly why so many people do not participate in these
groups. I have a thick skin and I found being called
a "putty-headed, bollock-brained, cretin" amusing,
as no one has ever risen to such levels of poetry
to insult me before. But to many people, the threat
of this kind of taunting prevents them from posting,
which limits the discussion to those who are arrogant
or insensitive enough not to care. I do not understand
why polite people who would never dream of being
rude to a stranger asking directions seem to have no
qualms about being unkind to someone asking the same question
via electronic means. I am, as you appear to be, an educated
person and could take the same tone with your post.
Lets see how it would read......
------------------------------------------------------------------
Thank you for pointing out the ignorance of the person
who felt that December 31, 1999 was a good time to
celebrate the coming millenia. I would point out
however, that the word "Cretin" refers to a native
of the island of Crete, and should therefore be capitalized.
Your obvious acceptance of the popular use of this slur
without understanding its origin shows you to be as
foolish as the person who accepted the popular opinion
as to when to celebrate the new millenium.
I would think that in these days of enlightenment,
when one uses a racial slur, one would at least
use it correctly. *sigh*
--------------------------------------------------------
I am not trying to insult you or bait you into a flame war,
I am just trying to say that I feel that this type of
response is counter-productive to us all.
On the other hand, I know how frustrating the internet
can be, and I take some responsibility as perhaps
my original post was not in the spirit of this
group, and perhaps offensive to the serious
people who post here. If that is the case, I sincerely
apologize.
Jon Croft
vfl...@prodigy.com
Sawney Beane
On Thu, 25 Sep 1997 13:20:02 +0100, "Craig Hardie"
<cha...@jungle.bt.co.uk> wrote:
>
>Here's an example of him recycling insults
Perhaps I was trying to make a point, eh? Or perhaps I was just
trying to put him in touch with your Inner Child? But I *am* glad
that you've been so disinterested, and are so elevated above the
debate, that you've gone to the trouble of reading all my posts.
*/;~}
However, if you feel that you, or your "long-time-companion" Steve
Graham, have copyrighted either the sentiment or the actual words
themselves, then I'll happily withdraw them and just substitute
"wanker," which I believe to be in the public domain:
"You really are a wanker, aren't you? You have my scorn."
(There, is that better?)
>If anyone wants to reply to this posting could they do so by email,
Why, so that you can publish their "private" responses and try to make
a name for yourself? Oh how droll. I *do* hope you're successful in
your ploy; it will be amusing to watch your credibility plummet when
you've revealed what a treacherous bastard you really are, won't it?
(BTW, I'm keeping an eye out for this tactic, so that I can repost
this reply, with date-header, to show just how predictable you are.)
In Contempt,
---Sawney Beane
Paul Sammy
In-reply-to: maga...@aol.com's message of 26 Sep 1997 04:25:26 GMT
>> Pig's are actually regarded as amongst the cleanest of the animal
>> kingdom.
> I've seen pig farms in Iowa...no they aren't
Maggie, where are you staying, currently? If its too personal, then
don't answer. And, group at large, this isn't flame-bait. Genuine
question.
> has more character and spunk in his little finger than most do in their
> whole bodies.
Indeed? *lol*
Ordinarily, I'd correct this in an email. :-)
"Spunk", means something else other than bravado over here. Semen, to
be exact. However, I guess most of us here know enough American to
parse that statement of yours.
> Always the same, boring or not,
> Maggie Stewart
Paul
--
World Shotokan Dojo List : www.argonet.co.uk/users/sps/Karate/
PlayStation Technical FAQ: www.argonet.co.uk/users/sps/psxfaq/
A sufficiently vitriolic political argument is *still* bollocks.
Mcheil Rob Mac Phàdruig
On 26 Sep 1997 10:51:50 GMT, pa...@doc.memex.co.uk (Paul Sammy) wrote:
>Ordinarily, I'd correct this in an email. :-)
>"Spunk", means something else other than bravado over here. Semen, to
>be exact. However, I guess most of us here know enough American to
>parse that statement of yours.
Spunk as semen is an alternate meaning to spunk as bravery as you very
well know. I think you wrote this to give yourself a little thrill,
writing dirty stuff to a lady.
Among Afrikaaners "Sammy" is a common term for a native of India.
You're not from Pakistan by any chance are you?
Měcheil Rob MacPhŕdruig
Drůidh:duine-uasal
Héi hó, tha SONAS air m'inntinn...
Paul Sammy
In-reply-to: mik...@backhaulnet.com's message of Fri, 26 Sep 1997 11:51:27 GMT
> On 26 Sep 1997 10:51:50 GMT, pa...@doc.memex.co.uk (Paul Sammy) wrote:
>> "Spunk", means something else other than bravado over here. Semen, to
>> be exact. However, I guess most of us here know enough American to
>> parse that statement of yours.
> Spunk as semen is an alternate meaning to spunk as bravery as you very
> well know.
Say "spunk" to anyone in Scotland and you're guaranteed an embarrassed grin.
>I think you wrote this to give yourself a little thrill,
> writing dirty stuff to a lady.
Nope, she mentioned it, not me. I was only trying to spare her
blushes. Like I said, normally I'd email someone about this sort of thing.
> Among Afrikaaners "Sammy" is a common term for a native of India.
> You're not from Pakistan by any chance are you?
No, but I *am* from a very diverse genetic background. I'm very
impressed- no-one else has ever known the origin of "Sammy" before.
What of it?
Steve Graham
MagaidhS wrote:
>
> >Wisdom doesn't always
> >come with age
>
> We'll wait and see about wisdom in your case, Steve. I'm not seeing it
> *just* yet.
Or in yours - and you are so much older than me.
>
> >My fingers are lithe
> >and delicate like a painists.
>
> So are mine. I was trained to be a concert pianist
Is that an offer?
>
> .>Wrong again - although the point of me studying Computing, Chemistry,
> >Physics, Philosophy, Psychology, Management Science and Business Studies
> >at Stirling Uni (that's in Scotland by the way - to enlighten foreigners
> >such as yourself) sometimes aludes me.
>
> Impressive course of study...but then I have three degrees to my
> credit...the word, by the way is "eludes"...please check your thesaurus for
> the correct usage.
Note spelling wasn't included. Three degrees? Does that mean you sing?
>
> >Actually I'm regarded as a bit anti-social.
>
> I'd have to agree with him on this one, Sawney...I think I see that more
> than the paparazzo thing...I bet he has a wrinkled mac in his closet.
No wrinkled mac I'm afraid - just a Beghaus for when I'm on the Munro's
- only 29 to date, unless you count repeats. (Bet this gets classed as a
"snobbish boor" again).
>
> >Pig's are actually regarded as amongst the cleanest of the animal
> >kingdom.
>
> I've seen pig farms in Iowa...no they aren't
A, but that was in Iowa, and those were American pigs. Everyone knows
that Americans are the filthiest pigs in the world.....
>
> .>Actually I do own a kilt (do you), and wear it to the occasional formal
> >do (charities etc) that I am called upon to attend (only two so far this
> >year - the Watsons parents ball in the Balmoral, and the Rocking Horse
> >charity do).
>
> I guess you forgot to add "snobbish boor" to the description, Sawney.
> But then the "nouveau riche" are ones for throwing around the latest formal
> "dos" they have attended. Old money doesn't act that way.
Who ever said I was rich? If I was I'd rather it was money I earned,
than money I was given by an accident of birth.
>
> >In this case, most would class it as imagination rather than guesswork.
>
> Imagination is based on guesswork...six of one, half a dozen of the other...
To quote Sawney - "and your point is?"
>
> >At least I don't try to hide.
>
> Maybe you should...
Maybe, maybe not.
>
> > As for the personal
> >adverts, I wouldn't know as I don't subscribe to alt.kinky.fetishes.
>
> That's not what I heard...but then I only get info like that second-hand...
I hear that's not all you get second hand...
>
> >You may be right with the first part, but self esteem has never been a
> >problem!
>
> Self-esteem? Is that what they are calling cocky smartmouth kids these
> days...full of self-esteem...I'll have to remember that.
*sigh* I wish I still was a kid. Must of us are full of something though
- not that everyone will admit it.
>
> > Mind you, you'd have to spend some time on the pan
> >afterwards - instead of puring out your shite on here.
>
> I'd be scared to death to eat that chili...probably made from leftover tripe.
Tripe?! That's a yucky English thing that is. Honestly it really isn't
that bad - I use '82 Rioja as a base and it makes such a difference.
Just got to bargain of half an hour on the big white telephone in
flamethrower mode the next day. Oh yes - and an extracter fan in the
bathroom is a very good idea....
>
> >*L* Oh good - wonder if I'll be the next Nigel then? Hmmm - maybe not, I
> >am a Nationalist after all.
>
> The next Nigel? Ohhhh, I don't think you're good enough.
Not had any complaints so far.
>
> >Will do - I'd certainly never let you do it in person, not with your
> >criminal record.
>
> I would consider it an honour for my children to know Sawney Beane. He
> has more character and spunk in his little finger than most do in their
> whole bodies.
Er, I have to tell you that "spunk" means something else here in
Scotland. As for character - he definitely is one of them.
>
> Always the same, boring or not,
> Maggie Stewart
I still think being "always the same" is a bit boring.
Sawney Beane
On Fri, 26 Sep 1997 08:35:39 -0700, Steve Graham <sys...@hotmail.com>
wrote:
>
>Please try to be original in future, you're boring me.
Well, then Stevie: run along play with the little coloured blocks;
Sawney Beane
On Fri, 26 Sep 1997 08:26:07 -0700, Steve Graham <sys...@hotmail.com>
wrote:
>
>No beard,
Idiot. I said:
>> >Appearance: A rather blocky, squarish head with a prognathous jaw
>> >covered by hair a la Herman Munster.
*Not*:
>> >Appearance: A rather blocky, squarish head, with a prognathous jaw
>> >covered by hair a la Herman Munster.
It's all in the *punctuation*; or didn't they teach you that while you
were
>studying Computing, Chemistry, Physics, Philosophy, Psychology,
>Management Science and Business Studies
(?)
I got your appearance from the geeky photo on your web-site, so your
Munsterish hair is described correctly (no doubt he'll rush off and
take down the ludicrous bekilted photo now and replace it with some
doctored piece of flattery).
>and I wear really thin contact lenses. My fingers are lithe and
>delicate like a painists.
Is that a Freudian-slip, Van Cliburn, or is it a reference to the pain
you cause everything you touch?
>Won't comment on the rest (modesty prevents).
Fear, more likely.
>> >Expression: Mildly deranged.
>
>No argument there...
>> >Educational Achievements: None.
>
>Wrong again - although the point of me studying Computing, Chemistry,
>Physics, Philosophy, Psychology, Management Science and Business Studies
>at Stirling Uni (that's in Scotland by the way - to enlighten foreigners such as
>yourself) sometimes aludes me.
Interesting then, that you never learned that "aludes" is not a word
at all. Not a typo either, since the "a" key is a full inch away from
the "e" key, even too far for your "painists" fingers to mis-type.
My, my: Stirling has a lot to answer for...
>Far be it from we to argue
Who's "we?" Are you schizophrenic, as well?
>Actually I'm regarded as a bit anti-social.
Oh, it's not that, dear boy! People are simply avoiding you, that's
all.
>Unfortunately most of my photography is rather crap.
Oh, I don't know: the subject material was acceptable, if nothing
special; the lighting was good (for landscapes, but you *do* after all
have to choose your moment, the aperture, and the speed); I agree that
your sense of composition is crap. Since I've won awards for some of
my photography (that'd be *my* photography, dear boy, not "Sawney's" -
but The Man Behind The Mask), I feel qualified to comment.
>I'll pass the sentiments on the missus (even though I've no idea who or
>what Squeaky Fromme is)
One of Crazy Charlie's ardent followers and many "wives." I believe
she's incarcerated now, so you *probably* have nothing to worry about
(but, best to hide the scissors, just in case).
>As for the milkman - my wife actually always seems to prefer out postmen...
Well, at least you're honest. Nice looking kids, give the Royal Mail
my regards.
>Pig's are actually regarded as amongst the cleanest of the animal
>kingdom. At least a lot cleaner than your average cave dweller.
Obviously you haven't spent any time on a Highland pig-farm...
>> >Clothing: Looks out-of-place and ill at ease in the kilt; a poseur.
>Actually I do own a kilt (do you), and wear it to the occasional formal
>do (charities etc) that I am called upon to attend (only two so far this
>year - the Watsons parents ball in the Balmoral, and the Rocking Horse
>charity do). Unfortunately when I got married I was to poor to buy a
>kilt outfit,
I see that spelling tough, one-syllable words such as "too" also
"aludes" you. Tsk, tsk; we really *must* do something about the
appalling state of affairs in your school, mustn't we?
>so the one I'm wearing was hired. The uneasiness comes from not
>knowing who wore it last - it could even have been someone like
>you (yuck - imagine the stains that would have left)! Not much
>prospect of that though - I think I was a 30 waist at the time.
Or a pantywaist.
>> >Attitude: Presumptuous; masks ignorance with foolish guesswork.
>In this case, most would class it as imagination rather than guesswork.
No, I think most would class it as presumption. After all, if my
looks, physique, and hygiene are as far advanced above yours
as my intelligence and education obviously are, then I must be a
veritable Adonis compared to you, mustn't I?
>At least I don't try to hide.
No. You foolishly expose your weaknesses and ignorance for
the entire world to see. It's your overweening ego: it convinces
you that you are actually worth looking at; that your pathetic
photography is actually worth looking at; that anybody gives a
damn about your "accomplishments," your drab, or your sprats.
(It is wrong, incidentally.)
>> The Wit And Wisdom Of Steve Graham:
>>
><I'm glad that you've edited the above down to a more appropriate size.>
>I wouldn't know as I don't subscribe to alt.kinky.fetishes.
Funny, since I found the group listed in your "author profile" in
DejaNews, I just assumed that you did... */:~}
>> >Intolerant, egocentric cynicism masking a deep rooted lack of personal
>> >esteem.
>
>You may be right with the first part, but self esteem has never been a
>problem!
No, I imagine that the "egocentric" bit takes care of that, doesn't
it?
>Oh good - wonder if I'll be the next Nigel then?
Oh, I think you *are* the next Nigel...
Bye-Bye Baby,
---Sawney Beane
Sawney Beane
On Fri, 26 Sep 1997 08:27:12 -0700, Steve Graham <sys...@hotmail.com>
wrote:
>
>I suppose with your mind it'd be hard to picture anything other than a
>septic tank....
Actually, when I picture *your* mind, I picture a rubbish-bin.
Taking Out The Trash,
---Sawney Beane
Micheil Rob Mac Phàdruig
On 26 Sep 1997 12:08:43 GMT, pa...@doc.memex.co.uk (Paul Sammy) wrote:
>> Among Afrikaaners "Sammy" is a common term for a native of India.
>> You're not from Pakistan by any chance are you?
>
>No, but I *am* from a very diverse genetic background. I'm very
>impressed- no-one else has ever known the origin of "Sammy" before.
>
>What of it?
Just wondered.
Steve Graham
MagaidhS wrote:
>
> >I suppose with your mind it'd be hard to picture anything other than a
> >septic tank....
> >
> >
>
> Beavis and Butt Head. I've watched that particular show once in my life
> and found it rather beneath me...maybe, Steve, that is why I am so lacking
> in a sense of humour? I'm not seeing the humour in that sort of drivel...
>
> ---Maggie Stewart
I think hating Beavis and Butthead is a female thing. I've never met a
women that liked the show, or a man that hated it. It's all academic in
my case anyway, as I don't think we get them in Hong Kong. Mind you I
wouldn't know as I hardly ever watch the telly. This weekend is an
exception though - what with the Ryder cup and a Grand Prix being on.
(I'll even refain from posting any humour related to what is "beneath
you" - I'm being a good boy today!)
Paul Sammy
In-reply-to: Hav...@Nice.Snack's message of Fri, 26 Sep 1997 12:43:48 GMT
> On Fri, 26 Sep 1997 08:26:07 -0700, Steve Graham <sys...@hotmail.com>
> wrote:
>> yourself) sometimes aludes me.
> Interesting then, that you never learned that "aludes" is not a word
Reduced to slagging typos, now, eh?
> at all. Not a typo either, since the "a" key is a full inch away from
> the "e" key, even too far for your "painists" fingers to mis-type.
What tosh!
1) Do you know what kind of keyboard he uses?
2) How large is his keyboard? I dunno- how do you?
3) Show me the proof that he couldn't mis-type it.
Even if it was a spelling mistake- _so_what_?
> your sense of composition is crap. Since I've won awards for some of
> my photography (that'd be *my* photography, dear boy, not "Sawney's" -
> but The Man Behind The Mask), I feel qualified to comment.
More claims that you won't substantiate, no doubt.
>> prospect of that though - I think I was a 30 waist at the time.
> Or a pantywaist.
Could you translate this bit of Americanism?
> looks, physique, and hygiene are as far advanced above yours
> as my intelligence and education obviously are, then I must be a
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
No comment.
> veritable Adonis compared to you, mustn't I?
More claims that you won't substantiate, no doubt.
>> At least I don't try to hide.
> No. You foolishly expose your weaknesses and ignorance for
> the entire world to see. It's your overweening ego: it convinces
More likely that he's comfortable enough with himself not to use a
mask when communicating with the world.
> Bye-Bye Baby,
> ---Sawney Beane
Paul
(cue tedious puppy-dog running gag)
Steve Graham
MagaidhS wrote:
>
> >Wait a minute - are you Sawney's mum? If so, you've even less of a sense
> >future, you're boring me.
>
> sister...but NOT his mum...less of a sense of humour? My darling, you
> don't even know...perhaps I might be more original if I had the proper
> inspiration...but since I cannot get that inspiration from you...I guess
> I'll have to look for it elsewhere....perhaps to the Welshman who referred
> to himself and his fellow countrymen as the *sober* Celts as opposed to the
> *non* sober Celts, i.e. the Scots and the Irish? Seems as though the man
> is of the opinion that just because the Scots and the Irish prefer a bit of
> independence this means they are either not serious or drunk all the time.
> You take your pick. He was quoted in such a way as to represent all the
> Welsh in this matter. What do you think?
>
> Always the same and certainly *not* lacking a sense of humour,
> Maggie Stewart
Sawney's sister - hmmm, could be a good joke in there somewhere (re.
inbreeding) but I'd better not. I'll settle for saying you probably
"know" him well (in the biblical sense).
As for the Welsh - I view them in the same way as I do Aberdonians -
bunch of sheep molesters! To look to them for inspiration (on anything
other than creative uses for wellington boots) would be truely sad.
Being serious (I can be occasionally), I can't say I'm surprised that
the Welsh vote on devolution was so close as I remain unconvinced of the
economics of an Welsh state. As for the Welsh being sober, I doubt many
of them can afford a decent bevvy!
(One more point, were you having a problem with your "." key at the
start of this post, as it seems to be sticking? I suggest five minutes
with a sledge hammer might fix it - and improve the quality of the posts
on this list a bit.)
Finally, isn't it boring always being the same?
Regards
Steve Graham (making no aol cracks you will note)
MagaidhS
To Paul...note...not even copying quotes at all....
I'm not in Scotland at this time. I will be returning shortly, however.
I forgot totally about the usage of the word "spunk"...it was the American
usage that I was referring to...
I do have to ask...for god's sake...why does everyone think I am sleeping
with Sawney?????? I don't even live anywhere near him.
(Sometimes people are sooooo exasperating.....one track minds...is that it?)
Always,
Maggie
Sawney Beane
On 26 Sep 1997 04:25:26 GMT, maga...@aol.com (MagaidhS) wrote:
>
>So are mine. I was trained to be a concert pianist
So: talented, as well as blonde. */:~}
>I'd be scared to death to eat that chili...probably made from leftover tripe.
Ooohhh! Ooohhh! Good one; I didn't have anything for the *chili*...
>The next Nigel? Ohhhh, I don't think you're good enough.
Yes. There may, indeed, be hope for Nigel.
>I would consider it an honour for my children to know Sawney Beane. He
>has more character and spunk in his little finger than most do in their whole
>bodies.
<*sniff!*> Why thank you, lass. In truth, the best way to treat the
bairns is as wee miniature adults. They seem to appreciate it, I know
I always did.
Thanks Again,
---Sawney Beane
MagaidhS
> I'll settle for saying you probably
>"know" him well (in the biblical sense).
Tsk tsk tsk...one track mind. We can honestly say that I have not ever
been that close to Sawney.
>Being serious (I can be occasionally), I can't say I'm surprised that
>the Welsh vote on devolution was so close as I remain unconvinced of the
>economics of an Welsh state. As for the Welsh being sober, I doubt many
>of them can afford a decent bevvy!
I agree with you on that. I have never thought of the Welsh as being
able or willing to rule themselves. I honestly thought of them more as
the rightful citizens of the UK while Scotland and Ireland should be
independent. (And as far as a decent bevvy is concerned...what's up with
American beer, anyway????)
>(One more point, were you having a problem with your "." key at the
>start of this post, as it seems to be sticking? I suggest five minutes
>with a sledge hammer might fix it -
OK, Steve. I *promise* I will stop indicating that blonde pause-to-think
thing that I do.
>Finally, isn't it boring always being the same?
Ummmmm...that would be a "no". The boyfriend doesn't seem to think so.
:-) And by saying I'm always the same, I mean that I am who I am without
following anyone else's style.
>Regards
>Steve Graham (making no aol cracks you will note)
Thank you for not making AOL cracks. I appreciate that. :-)
Always unpredictable, (like that better?)
Maggie Stewart
Sawney Beane
On Fri, 26 Sep 1997 17:21:29 -0700, Steve Graham <sys...@hotmail.com>
wrote:
>
>I've never met a women
Or even a woman? *Much* is now Explained.
I'm Terribly Sorry,
---Sawney Beane
Sawney Beane
On 26 Sep 1997 12:08:43 GMT, pa...@doc.memex.co.uk (Paul Sammy) wrote:
>
>No, but I *am* from a very diverse genetic background.
Mmmmm: hyaenas, maggots, and guttersnipes, I should imagine...
For The National Museum of Zoology,
---Dr. Sawney Beane
Sawney Beane
On Fri, 26 Sep 1997 11:51:27 GMT, mik...@backhaulnet.com (Mcheil Rob
Mac Phŕdruig) wrote:
>
>Among Afrikaaners "Sammy" is a common term for a native of India.
>You're not from Pakistan by any chance are you?
Apparently, he came over from Calais...
Nothing, I Didn't Say A Word,
---Sawney Beane
Sawney Beane
On 26 Sep 1997 02:57:45 GMT, apl...@mail2.sas.upenn.edu (Alexander
Platt) wrote:
>
>Kinda makes you wish we had a moderater, don't it?
Didn't you know? I'm the (modest and moderate) moderator for this
group. Feel right at home: I absolutely *abhor* censorship.
Moderately,
---Sawney Beane
Sawney Beane
On 26 Sep 1997 07:05:36 GMT, VFL...@prodigy.com (Jon Croft) wrote:
>
>This kind of response to a genuine appeal for help,
>particularly one that crosses cultrural boundries, is
>exactly why so many people do not participate in
>these groups.
Funny, I thought it was because they were passive/timid.
>I do not understand why polite people who would never
>dream of being rude to a stranger asking directions seem
>to have no qualms about being unkind to someone asking
>the same question via electronic means.
There's been a lot of thought about that, lately. Some maintain that
it's the *separation* the medium enforces: that others don't seem
"real" to the respondent, much as in "computerised" warfare. Having
recently lost both my heart and my mind through this medium, I would
disagree with that assessment.. Being a firm believer in the verities
of realpolitik, I think a good deal of it has to do with the fact that
if you call someone with whose opinions you disagree a "putty-headed,
bollock-brained, cretinous wanker" while they're standing right next
to you, it can lead to circumstances where one or both of you might
well end up in hospital, in jail, or in the mortuary. However, I do
*not* believe that this invalidates the degree of truth in the
interaction; it is after all a new medium and will have different
levels of response than what we have become accustomed to heretofore.
Consider: you don't bother brushing your hair before you answer the
telephone, do you? But you would do, if you were going to meet with
someone personally.
>I would point out however, that the word "Cretin" refers to a native
>of the island of Crete, and should therefore be capitalized.
You are incorrect; allow me to edify:
cretin, n. [Fr. cretin, dial. form of chretien], a person suffering
from cretinism.
Which is defined as:
cretinism, n. [Fr. cretinisme; see cretin], a congenital deficiency of
thyroid secretion with resulting deformity and idiocy.
So, in fact, it is *not* capitalised. But you were saying:
>Your obvious acceptance of the popular use of this slur
>without understanding its origin shows you to be as
>foolish as the person who accepted the popular opinion
>as to when to celebrate the new millenium.
I think not.
>I would think that in these days of enlightenment,
>when one uses a racial slur, one would at least
>use it correctly.
Unless, of course, it was never a racial slur to begin with.
>I am not trying to insult you or bait you into a flame war,
>I am just trying to say that I feel that this type of
>response is counter-productive to us all.
Dear Jon,
In fact you may well be right, and I wish to assure you that I did
not single you out for abuse as a personal matter at all. In fact, if
I bore *you* any ill-will, I would hardly have gone to the trouble of
replying to you as I am now doing. It's just that I've been putting
up with this *cretinous* nonsense, and the gobshites who spout it,
for several years now - and I obviously have at least two years and
three months worth to go before it will finally cease to plague me.
Perhaps I should inform you that you'll get a similar response from me
(in person or otherwise) when I am compelled to hear "nucUlar" or
"disorientAted" or "drownDed," all of which makes me reach for hot
iron and cold steel reflexively.
Neutrally,
---Sawney Beane
MagaidhS
>3. [Colloq.], courage; spirit; pluck; mettle.
That's the one! That's what I meant! Yeah! That's it!>Now, I *do* like
my liquor... And I *do* tend to "take fire easily"
>and "flare up" (it's my Gaelic temper).
Hey now...I don't have a temper like that...since when did it become Gaelic?
>went directly for the gutter-inference, even though both
>"spunk" and "spunkie" are listed as being of Gaelic and Scots origin.
I should have expected it, Sawney. I did forget about the slang
reference because I happen to be more dictionary-oriented than most. I
don't know as that makes me more literate, but it does seem to make a
difference in whether I always remember slang or not.
>Perhaps it's not so surprising. After all, gutter-dwellers will
>naturally be more likely to draw inferences they are familiar
>with, won't they?
I wasn't surprised at all. You see, men that know me, as well as men that
don't, have a habit of making gutter references. Seems to be some sort of
"aura" I exude. Ah well, just something else for the little blonde to deal
with. The interesting thing is...did I make any gutter references to
anyone to start that all up? I didn't think so, but correct me if I am wrong.
Always the same, (but does that mean I am boring?)
Maggie Stewart
Sawney Beane
On Fri, 26 Sep 1997 17:38:35 -0700, Steve Graham <sys...@hotmail.com>
wrote:
>
>Is that an offer?
Yes; I think she's offering to hate you. Why, should we contact Fiona
and advise her that you're on the lookout for an "offer?"
>A,
(?)
>but that was in Iowa, and those were American pigs. Everyone knows
>that Americans are the filthiest pigs in the world.....
It is a country with a population some *Fifty_Times* that of Scotland.
Many of them Scots-descended. The proportion of "pigs" is generally
the same, although naturally: there are fifty time the sheer *number*
of them. From *your* perspective, the percentage of "pigs" in your
immediate surroundings (i.e.: inside your skin) is 100%.
>I hear that's not all you get second hand...
The very thought of you in sexual congress with a female (of _any_
species) fills me with a revulsion I can scarcely describe. Is Fiona
blind, or synaesthetic, by any chance?
>*sigh* I wish I still was a kid.
Oh, you are. A smart-mouthed, snotty-nosed little sprat.
>Must of us are full of something though - not that everyone will admit it.
Oh, I don't know: I, for example, am full of Balvenie (and, of course,
goodwill and brotherly love for all Mankind). Whereas you are full of
yourself.
>I still think being "always the same" is a bit boring.
Yes, that's what Fiona was saying about you just the other night.
Whoops, I promised not to reveal that confidence...
Bye, Stevie,
---Sawney Beane
MagaidhS
>Nothing, I Didn't Say A Word,
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
(Yes Paul I know that didn't add one whit to the substance of the thread,
but geez...every now and then I just get a kick out of what's going on here
and can't think of a better reply. I'm so sorry!!)
MagaidhS
>So: talented, as well as blonde. */:~}
Read the other post. :-)
>Ooohhh! Ooohhh! Good one; I didn't have anything for the *chili*...
Thank you. (bowing)
>Yes. There may, indeed, be hope for Nigel.
Yes, indeed.
><*sniff!*> Why thank you, lass. In truth, the best way to treat the
>bairns is as wee miniature adults.
Yes they do appreciate it. They are adults to me. Two not so miniature
as they are teenagers.
Always the same and your faithful friend, Sawney,
Maggie Stewart
MagaidhS
Oooohhhh I missed this one the first time around.>Yes; I think she's
offering to hate you.
Why, should we contact Fiona
>and advise her that you're on the lookout for an "offer?"
I was wondering the same thing.
>It is a country with a population some *Fifty_Times* that of Scotland.
>Many of them Scots-descended. The proportion of "pigs" is generally
>the same, although naturally: there are fifty time the sheer *number*
>of them. From *your* perspective, the percentage of "pigs" in your
>immediate surroundings (i.e.: inside your skin) is 100%.
Good with the numbers thing. You impressed *me*. :-)
>The very thought of you in sexual congress with a female (of _any_
>species) fills me with a revulsion I can scarcely describe. Is Fiona
>blind, or synaesthetic, by any chance?
Me too
>Oh, you are. A smart-mouthed, snotty-nosed little sprat.
Yes I agree
>Oh, I don't know: I, for example, am full of Balvenie (and, of course,
>goodwill and brotherly love for all Mankind).
I admitted what I was full of. I'd never deny it. :-)
>Yes, that's what Fiona was saying about you just the other night.
>Whoops, I promised not to reveal that confidence...
Thanks for the comeback, Sawney. Your support is always appreciated.
Where did those gutter-comments originate, anyway? I am *quite* sure I
didn't start it.
Always the same and grateful for your friendship, Sawney,
Maggie Stewart
MagaidhS
Just as a matter of record, something I posted was clearly misunderstood
as was made clear in an e-mail to which a reply cannot be made. The
important thing is that the parallel referred to had an almost opposite
reference point than that which was taken. Sometimes politics and
principles draw certain types to certain crossroads in their lives. That
was the point of reference. In addition to that, the *paranoia* is
unfounded. It's too bad that it has to occur. It might be wise for some
people to reconsider the defenses and the walls that they put up when
dealing with certain matters that are *not* of the heart. There is a
certain strength in numbers and that strength is most necessary at this
point in time considering threats and promises of threats that have been
received. I still need to make that explanation.
Always the same and very serious this time,
Maggie Stewart
Sawney Beane
On 26 Sep 1997 10:51:50 GMT, pa...@doc.memex.co.uk (Paul Sammy) wrote:
>
>"Spunk", means something else other than bravado over here.
Funny, my dictionary says:
spunk, n. [Ir. sponc, tinder, touchwood, sponge; Gael. sponc
< L. spongia, a sponge], 1. a kind of wood or fungus that takes
fire easily; punk; tinder. 2. [British Dial.], a spark or small
flame. 3. [Colloq.], courage; spirit; pluck; mettle. v.i. to flare
up; kindle.
Further, just below it defines "spunkie:"
spunkie, n. [Scot.], 1. the will-o'-the-wisp; marsh fire. 2. liquor.
Now, I *do* like my liquor... And I *do* tend to "take fire easily"
and "flare up" (it's my Gaelic temper). But I'd have thought you
could have done so much *more* (had you been literate, of course)
with "sponge" and "punk" and "fungus" and "small flame" and even
"tinder" (which lends itself to a delightful play on words, *if* you
were literate, of course). Hell, even "marsh fire" leads one to all
sorts of possibilities (re: "marsh gasses," etc.) - if, that is, you
were literate, of course.
But instead you (and your troglodytic half-brother Steve Graham-
Cracker) went directly for the gutter-inference, even though both
"spunk" and "spunkie" are listed as being of Gaelic and Scots origin.
Strange, that, for one who bills himself as More Of A Scotsman than us
puir wee expatriots...
Perhaps it's not so surprising. After all, gutter-dwellers will
naturally be more likely to draw inferences they are familiar
with, won't they?
The Will-O'-The-Wisp,
---Sawney Beane
MagaidhS
>Or even a woman? *Much* is now Explained.
Hey, did I miss this original post somewhere? Darn. I would have jumped
on that one. Notice I did *not* say jumped on *him*.
>I'm Terribly Sorry,
Me too, I wish I had seen that one. I missed out. :-(
--------->Maggie Stewart
Steve Howie
MagaidhS <maga...@aol.com> wrote:
:To Paul...note...not even copying quotes at all....
:I'm not in Scotland at this time. I will be returning shortly, however.
:I forgot totally about the usage of the word "spunk"...it was the American
:usage that I was referring to...
On that very subject, the Toronto Sun ( a source of great unintended
humour) wrote a blurb on Kristie Allie (late of "Cheers" fame),
discussing her new sitcom and how it portraid her abilities to roll with
the punches etc. ad nauseum. The Sun's unfortunate title to this article was
"Kristie's closet full of spunk"
hmmm... after I pissed myself laughing I clipped the article and will
have it framed I think :)
Scotty
--
Steve Howie
Netnews and Listserv Admin
University of Guelph
MagaidhS
>Or in yours - and you are so much older than me.
Perhaps my wisdom is in other areas than yours?
>Is that an offer?
for piano lessons? Or my fingers?
>Note spelling wasn't included. Three degrees? Does that mean you sing?
HA! Obviously spelling wasn't included. Three degrees: history,
English, and scenic and lighting design (theatre and rock and roll). Yes I
used to sing professionally but preferred backstage or running the light
board so gave up performing.
>No wrinkled mac I'm afraid - just a Beghaus for when I'm on the Munro's
>- only 29 to date, unless you count repeats. (Bet this gets classed as a
>"snobbish boor" again).
Old money doesn't drop names, my dear. Hence the statement about snobbish
boors.
>A, but that was in Iowa, and those were American pigs. Everyone knows
>that Americans are the filthiest pigs in the world.....
Absolutely. And I believe my ex-husband would qualify there.
>Who ever said I was rich? If I was I'd rather it was money I earned,
>than money I was given by an accident of birth.
I gave up the money I would have received by accident of birth. It's the
status that goes with the name that I cannot seem to shed, although I have
been trying desperately to do so.
>To quote Sawney - "and your point is?"
A matter of semantics. It would not be "imagination rather than
guesswork", but perhaps " imagination and/or guesswork". In fact, the
point of that whole statement of yours would be lost in the issue of semantics.
>Maybe, maybe not.
But maybe you should.
>I hear that's not all you get second hand...
Is this one of those gutter-minded remarks again?
>*sigh* I wish I still was a kid. Must of us are full of something though
>- not that everyone will admit it.
Yes you are still a kid. You're at least 10 years younger than I am. And
I freely admit that I am full of it. Never said I wasn't.
>Just got to bargain of half an hour on the big white telephone in
>flamethrower mode the next day. Oh yes - and an extracter fan in the
>bathroom is a very good idea....
OK
>Not had any complaints so far.
From whom have you had no complaints?
>Er, I have to tell you that "spunk" means something else here in
>Scotland.
Please note another post in this group concerning the dictionary
definition of what I said.
As I said there, I often forget about slang interpretations because I am
more dictionary-oriented.
>As for character - he definitely is one of them.
Yes he is. :-)
>I still think being "always the same" is a bit boring.
Ummmm...the boyfriends never thought so. :-) And being always the same
refers to my personality which is that of one very spontaneous blonde. :-)
Always the same and believe me *not* boring,
Maggie Stewart
Jon Croft
>On 26 Sep 1997 07:05:36 GMT, VFL...@prodigy.com (Jon Croft) wrote:
>>
>>This kind of response to a genuine appeal for help,
>>particularly one that crosses cultrural boundries, is
>>exactly why so many people do not participate in
>>these groups.
:Funny, I thought it was because they were passive/timid.
Maybe so, but do not the passive/timid souls among
us deserve to be heard?
>>I do not understand why polite people who would never
>>dream of being rude to a stranger asking directions seem
>>to have no qualms about being unkind to someone asking
>>the same question via electronic means.
:There's been a lot of thought about that, lately. Some maintain that
:it's the *separation* the medium enforces: that others don't seem
:"real" to the respondent, much as in "computerised" warfare. Having
:recently lost both my heart and my mind through this medium, I would
:disagree with that assessment.. Being a firm believer in the verities
:of realpolitik, I think a good deal of it has to do with the fact that
:if you call someone with whose opinions you disagree a "putty-headed,
:bollock-brained, cretinous wanker" while they're standing right next
:to you, it can lead to circumstances where one or both of you might
:well end up in hospital, in jail, or in the mortuary. However, I do
:*not* believe that this invalidates the degree of truth in the
:interaction; it is after all a new medium and will have different
:levels of response than what we have become accustomed to heretofore.
:Consider: you don't bother brushing your hair before you answer the
:telephone, do you? But you would do, if you were going to meet with
:someone personally.
I had never thought of it in those terms, and I see the validity
of the argument. However, is the discourse between two people,
no matter how opposed they are in viewpoint, enhanced by schoolyard
insults? My initial impression of you was based on this insult,
and I thought less of you for it. Not because you insulted me,
but because I thought you incapable of any other form of expression.
Your response here has been thoughtfull, intelligent, and
restrained. (I consider myself *very* polite, but even I could
not have resisted savaging someone who made the error I did
regarding "cretins".) In other words, why would a person
who can so readily defend himself with wit and humor resort
to the type of mindless mud-slinging one can hear in any pub
when two hooligans are discussing the relative merits of
Crystal Palace vs Manchester United? ( Apologies in advance
if I got this wrong, but I had to translate this from
American.) And I don't mean to direct this at just you.
In the short time I have been visting this group,
I have seen people move from fascinating insights
to the most ridiculous posturing since Neville Chamberlain.
In my country, the debates involving Abraham Lincoln are
considered the pinnacle of rational discourse between
adversaries. When reading these posts a recurring image
came to me. Abraham Lincoln stands up and says;
"My dear adversary, I respect what you say, but you suck,
you pathetic wanker!"
My final point on this: Why would a man who
owns a shotgun hunt with a rock?
>>I would point out however, that the word "Cretin" refers to a native
>>of the island of Crete, and should therefore be capitalized.
:You are incorrect; allow me to edify:
:cretin, n. [Fr. cretin, dial. form of chretien], a person suffering
:from cretinism.
:Which is defined as:
:cretinism, n. [Fr. cretinisme; see cretin], a congenital deficiency of
:thyroid secretion with resulting deformity and idiocy.
:So, in fact, it is *not* capitalised. But you were saying:
Bravo....
This is so much more effective than outright insults.
The victim, (me), is so obviously wrong that by just stating
the facts you have made me feel much worse than by calling me
a wanker. Designation as a wanker I can argue with,
but facts are not disputable. (By the way, my
dictionary, which I might have made use of prior
to shooting off my mouth, defines a cretin as
"one of indeterminant origins". Since this describes
the vast majority of my fellow countrymen, I find
it hard to take offense.)
(More correcting regarding author's
ignorant statement about the origins
of "cretin" snipped to allow for
a minimal retention of dignity.)
>>I am not trying to insult you or bait you into a flame war,
>>I am just trying to say that I feel that this type of
>>response is counter-productive to us all.
:Dear Jon,
:In fact you may well be right, and I wish to assure you that I did
:not single you out for abuse as a personal matter at all. In fact, if
:I bore *you* any ill-will, I would hardly have gone to the trouble of
:replying to you as I am now doing. It's just that I've been putting
:up with this *cretinous* nonsense, and the gobshites who spout it,
:for several years now - and I obviously have at least two years and
:three months worth to go before it will finally cease to plague me.
:Perhaps I should inform you that you'll get a similar response from me
:(in person or otherwise) when I am compelled to hear "nucUlar" or
:"disorientAted" or "drownDed," all of which makes me reach for hot
:iron and cold steel reflexively.
:Neutrally,
:---Sawney Beane
Perhaps we are not that different. In my country, it is
"kindYgarden", or "relAtor", (as opposed to realtor; one who
sells real estate). The one that makes me reach for
my roscoe, (Americans are more efficient, we use guns instead of knives),
is the commonly accepted pronounciation of a city not far from me
called "Westminster". This is pronounced by 50 % of the population
as "WestminIster", as in a clergyman not from the east.
What are these wankers thinking anyway, can't they read?
Not likely to visit Crete in
the near future as the price
of liquor is too high, I am,
Jon Croft
vfl...@prodigy.com
PS... What it the hell is a gobshite, and why didn't
you call me that?
MagaidhS
>(I'll even refain from posting any humour related to what is "beneath
>you" - I'm being a good boy today!)
I see. Being a good boy? I could tell you what else is beneath me, but
I'll be a good girl today, too. :-)
>Regards
Yes, I see that.
Always the same no matter what's beneath me,
Maggie Stewart
MagaidhS
>I think you wrote this to give yourself a little thrill,
>writing dirty stuff to a lady.
I wondered about that. But then I am used to it. For some reason the
"thrill-seekers" always find *me*. I wish I knew why, but they do. Thank
you for the kind support. Now, though, I would be careful, if I were you.
Before long they will either be accusing me of being *your* mother, too, or
sleeping with you. Take your pick. That seems to be the attitude of
certain ones around here. :-)
Always the same,
Maggie Stewart
MagaidhS
>Say "spunk" to anyone in Scotland and you're guaranteed an embarrassed grin.
And that would be because it is slang. As you know by now, I am sure, the
dictionary proves me to be correct in my usage of the term.
>Nope, she mentioned it, not me. I was only trying to spare her
>blushes.
Honey, I don't blush that easily. If I did, I wouldn't post to this
newsgroup at all. I don't blush and I don't back down. I do, however,
prefer to keep my personal life private.
>Like I said, normally I'd email someone about this sort of thing.
And if you had, I would have pulled out my dictionary and proved my point
there, as well, *but* I am glad that you didn't.
>I'm very
>impressed- no-one else has ever known the origin of "Sammy" before.
What makes you say that? I mean, just because Mike is the one that
posted it doesn't mean that he is the *only* one that knew.
Still noticing the little digs about the e-mail,
Maggie Stewart
MagaidhS
>Reduced to slagging typos, now, eh?
>What tosh!
>
>1) Do you know what kind of keyboard he uses?
>2) How large is his keyboard? I dunno- how do you?
>3) Show me the proof that he couldn't mis-type it.
>
>Even if it was a spelling mistake- _so_what_?
>More claims that you won't substantiate, no doubt.
>Could you translate this bit of Americanism?
>No comment.
>More claims that you won't substantiate, no doubt.
>More likely that he's comfortable enough with himself not to use a
>mask when communicating with the world.
>(cue tedious puppy-dog running gag)
Well, by now we know it was not a spelling error. It has nothing to do
with his keyboard. Unsubstantiated claims can stay that way considering
who it is that wants them substantiated! One last thing: we all have
masks of one sort or another. Don't tell me that you don't because I bet
money that if I were to dig just a little bit I would find the one you wear
in the closet within arms' reach. Yes, that puppy-dog running gag is
rather cute, isn't it? :-)
Maggie Stewart
MagaidhS
>Can't ever get the coloured blocks off of Fraser I'm afraid.
My youngest has hers here, if you would like to come over and play, Steve.
She doesn't mind sharing.
>Regards
Of course.
------->Maggie Stewart
MagaidhS
>Lucky you.
Maybe, maybe not...
>Therefore I'd have to say that most American
>beer is basically piss (Rolling Rock's not bad though).
Not even Rolling Rock.
>Now you're boasting. Careful - you'll get Sawney excited.
I highly doubt that. And boasting? No...just stating a fact.
>Indeed.
Absolutely.
>Ok - being an AOLer you probably wouldn't have understood them anyway...
AOL is part of the learning experience. One has to start somewhere. It
just so happens it's not the only server I have here. Just the one that I
find I can annoy you with the most.
>No - too predictable a reply.
On purpose.
>Regards
You think so?
------->Maggie Stewart
Solomon Paul Sammy
In article <19970927050...@ladder01.news.aol.com>, maga...@aol.com
(MagaidhS) wrote:
[snip]
> >I hear that's not all you get second hand...
> Is this one of those gutter-minded remarks again?
[snip]
> >I still think being "always the same" is a bit boring.
> Ummmm...the boyfriends never thought so. :-)
Black Pot---->Black Kettle.
Paul
... We are John Cleese of Borg. ...And now for something completely irrelevent: Resistance. Spam is futile.
--
PlayStation Technical FAQ http://www.argonet.co.uk/users/sps/psxfaq/
Euro-Canadian Shotokan Dojo List http://www.argonet.co.uk/users/sps/Karate/
Solomon Paul Sammy
In article <343d4b02...@news.pacbell.net>, Hav...@Nice.Snack (Sawney
Beane) wrote:
>
> On 26 Sep 1997 10:51:50 GMT, pa...@doc.memex.co.uk (Paul Sammy)
> wrote:
> >
> >"Spunk", means something else other than bravado over here.
>
> Funny, my dictionary says:
[snip]
I don't *care* what your dictionary says, I'm telling you, if I popped out
and grabbed 10 people walking along Kilmarnock Road "spunk" would mean
"semen".
Actually, I've just looked it up in a copy of The Popular Oxford Dictionary
of Current English and it has semen down as a definition. What dictionary
are you using, Websters?
Tell you what, I'll ask people whilst I'm out tonight having a pint or two
in Glasgow. If I meet any locals that don't smirk immediately I'll buy you
a return ticket to Edinburgh airport. Incidently, any local Scots care to
dispute my definition of "spunk"?
> But instead you (and your troglodytic half-brother Steve Graham-
> Cracker) went directly for the gutter-inference, even though both
> "spunk" and "spunkie" are listed as being of Gaelic and Scots origin.
Tough. That's the way it is in _Scotland_ now. If you dispute it, try it
out the next time you're over.
> Strange, that, for one who bills himself as More Of A Scotsman than
> us
> puir wee expatriots...
Are you talking about me? All I've asked is about your basis for voting in
the referendum. You can call yourself Scottish or whatever. I don't care.
> Perhaps it's not so surprising. After all, gutter-dwellers will
> naturally be more likely to draw inferences they are familiar
> with, won't they?
This from someone who regularly calls people "wankers". You *do* know what
that means in Scotland, don't you, Sawney?
Paul
... I am Chekov of Borg: you vill be asseemilated. Reesiztance eez futile.
MagaidhS
>Black Pot---->Black Kettle.
Well just thought I would return "in kind". After all, the rest of you
seem to enjoy it.
------->Maggie Stewart
Solomon Paul Sammy
In article <343e501d...@news.pacbell.net>, Hav...@Nice.Snack (Sawney
Beane) wrote:
>
> On Fri, 26 Sep 1997 11:51:27 GMT, mik...@backhaulnet.com (Mcheil Rob
> Mac Phŕdruig) wrote:
> >
> >Among Afrikaaners "Sammy" is a common term for a native of India.
> >You're not from Pakistan by any chance are you?
>
> Apparently, he came over from Calais...
>
>
Amplify what you mean please. Or aren't you man enough to say it?
Paul
... I am soft drink of Borg. You will be carbonated.
Solomon Paul Sammy
In article <19970927125...@ladder01.news.aol.com>, maga...@aol.com
(MagaidhS) wrote:
>
> >Say "spunk" to anyone in Scotland and you're guaranteed an
> embarrassed grin.
>
> And that would be because it is slang. As you know by now, I am
> sure, the
> dictionary proves me to be correct in my usage of the term.
Which dictionary is that? Proved? Hmm.
[snip]
> I don't blush and I don't back down.
If you don't back down, where are all those substansive replies to questions
directed at you?
> I do,
> however,
> prefer to keep my personal life private.
Whoopie do.
> >Like I said, normally I'd email someone about this sort of thing.
>
> And if you had, I would have pulled out my dictionary and proved my
> point
> there, as well, *but* I am glad that you didn't.
"proved your point"! You're wrong!
It doesn't matter what your dictionary says about English usage 3,000 miles
away- in Scotland "spunk" means what I said it means.
Everyone who actually *stays* in Scotland and reads s.c.s. knows it!
> >I'm very
> >impressed- no-one else has ever known the origin of "Sammy" before.
> What makes you say that?
Let me rephrase that: I've never met anyone, or spoken to anyone, or emailed
with anyone or usenetted with anyone that appeared to know that except Mike.
> I mean, just because Mike is the one that
> posted it doesn't mean that he is the *only* one that knew.
Correct. Your logic is impeccable.
> Still noticing the little digs about the e-mail,
Good, does that mean I can make them less than blindingly obvious?
If its any consolation I'm still noticing your little digs concerning the
outright lies you've said about the email escapade. (Such at the "prefer to
keep my personal life private" bit above)
> Maggie Stewart
Paul
... I am Keanu, of Borg. You're about to be assimilated. What do you do? What do you do?
Sawney Beane
On 27 Sep 1997 04:08:52 GMT, maga...@aol.com (MagaidhS) wrote:
>
>Hey now...I don't have a temper like that...since when did it become Gaelic?
Well, I had originally typed "Celtic temper," but I didn't want to get
embroiled in a long harangue with chic over how "Celtic-is-a-culture-
not-a-bloodline," etc. */;~}
>I did forget about the slang reference because I happen to be more
>dictionary-oriented than most. I don't know as that makes me more
>literate,
No, but it makes you more genteel and well-mannered.
>I wasn't surprised at all. You see, men that know me, as well as men that
>don't, have a habit of making gutter references. Seems to be some sort of
>"aura" I exude.
It's an attribute of being perceived as a "regular guy." (I hope
you'll take that in the spirit in which it was intended.) Men
generally only watch their language around flowers-of-femininity
whom they perceive to be too delicate to withstand the sort of
joking-about that goes on between *them*. It is a great compliment
for a woman to be considered "one of the guys," since I've yet to
meet the man who didn't absolutely adore this sort of woman.
>Always the same, (but does that mean I am boring?)
Never.
Yo, Magaidh!,
---Sawney Beane
MagaidhS
>Well, I had originally typed "Celtic temper," but I didn't want to get
>embroiled in a long harangue with chic over how "Celtic-is-a-culture-
>not-a-bloodline," etc. */;~}
Oh I see. Yet another matter of semantics.
>No, but it makes you more genteel and well-mannered.
I'm a stagehand and roadie as well as a lighting designer. How on earth
did I become more genteel and well-mannered? :-)
>It's an attribute of being perceived as a "regular guy." (I hope
>you'll take that in the spirit in which it was intended.) Men
>generally only watch their language around flowers-of-femininity
>whom they perceive to be too delicate to withstand the sort of
>joking-about that goes on between *them*.
*L* Well I suppose being in this sort of business has made me a "regular
guy" out of necessity and survival. Road crews in general lead a pretty
rough life out of a tour bus for months on end.
>It is a great compliment
>for a woman to be considered "one of the guys," since I've yet to
>meet the man who didn't absolutely adore this sort of woman.
I have. Solomon Paul Sammy. I'd say he surely is faaaaarrrrr from
adoring me. Of course I would wager to say that no matter what sort of
woman I was he would not be likely to say he even liked me at all. But
then one can't win over everyone, now can they? I have yet to determine
how great a loss that might be. I would also wager to say that the jury is
out on Steve Graham, as well.
>Never.
Thank you.
>Yo, Magaidh!,
I don't know a lot of Spanish, Sawney, but doesn't "yo" mean "I"? So just
to jump on this before the rest of them do, does that mean that you are me?
(I, Maggie!) Just thought I would say that in the spirit of friendship
considering the lot of them are not likely to do the same. :-)
------->Maggie Stewart
Win Dunseath
Jon Croft wrote:".....Do I detect a note of resentment over England's
imperialist tendencies? ( I noticed they were very gracious in returning
Hong Kong to the Chinese. It's amazing how an opposing army of 10
million men makes one want to do the *right* thing. I suspect if
Scotland had an army that size, they would not only grant you full
independence, but would give some serious thought to sprucing up
Hadrian's wall....)
You should understand the history of Hong Kong first before making such
comments. 10 years ago the Chinese government wanted England to continue
control of Hong Kong and because of the infinite wisdom (not) of Margret
Thatcher, she demanded that England turn control back to China. It wasnt
until the last 4-5 years did the Chinese's patriotic momentum increase.
Your comment about having 10 million men in the chinese army wasnt an
issue. The Chinese never demanded or illuded to that they would
"re-gain" possession by military force.
Solomon Paul Sammy
In article <342fb2fe...@news.pacbell.net>, Hav...@Nice.Snack (Sawney
Beane) wrote:
> In Scotland, we just call it, "Wankerville."
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Troll alert!! Games-a-bogey!
>
> > PS... What it the hell is a gobshite, and why didn't
> > you call me that?
>
> Gob=mouth; shite=excrement. Hence "gobshite."
But Sawney *isn't* a guttersnipe for using it.
Honestly.
Paul
... I am Chakotay of Borg. Tattoos are irrelevant. Your spirit guide will be assimilated as well.
Solomon Paul Sammy
In article <19970928011...@ladder02.news.aol.com>, maga...@aol.com
(MagaidhS) wrote:
> >It is a great compliment
> >for a woman to be considered "one of the guys," since I've yet to
> >meet the man who didn't absolutely adore this sort of woman.
>
> I have. Solomon Paul Sammy.
We've met? When?
Is this another outpouring of a fevered mind or perhaps the word "meet" has
a different meaning on the streets of Scotland than elsewhere?
>I'd say he surely is faaaaarrrrr from
> adoring me. Of course I would wager to say that no matter what sort
> of
> woman I was he would not be likely to say he even liked me at all.
hmm. Are you trying to imply I'm homosexual?
Also, don't presume to know about my opinions. I am quite capable of
forming and expressing my own.
[snip]
> (I, Maggie!) Just thought I would say that in the spirit of
> friendship
> considering the lot of them are not likely to do the same. :-)
Could they two of you take this mutual-appreciation society to email?
Absolutely no-one else is interested. If Sawney doesn't trust you enough to
give you his email, then at least you could move to a different news group.
Or at the very least start a new thread and name it appropriately so I can
avoid it.
Paul (waiting for a deluge of abuse for a reasonable request)
... I am Berman, of Borg. Your NextGen, as it has been, is over
MagaidhS
>Which dictionary is that? Proved? Hmm.
Checked three different dictionaries. Tell you what. Show me what
dictionary you get yours out of and I will acquiesce.
>If you don't back down, where are all those substansive replies to questions
>directed at you?
Substantive in what way? The questions were perceived as requests for
personal information. It is as I said. My personal life is private.
>"proved your point"! You're wrong!
>It doesn't matter what your dictionary says about English usage 3,000 miles
>away- in Scotland "spunk" means what I said it means.
>Everyone who actually *stays* in Scotland and reads s.c.s. knows it!
And everyone I know who actually *stays* in Scotland whether they read
s.c.s or not will agree that it is not used in the correct form when used
*your* way.
>Correct. Your logic is impeccable.
At least we agree on something.
>If its any consolation I'm still noticing your little digs concerning the
>outright lies you've said about the email escapade. (Such at the "prefer to
>keep my personal life private" bit above)
Like I said in another post, check out who else uses your e-mail, Paul. I
received an inordinate amount of mail from your e-mail name/address
directly after my cease and desist request that you claim you did not receive.
Now please do me a favor and lighten up. Life is much too short to
continue to be this angry. I am not angry with you. It's not necessary
for you to be angry with me. Apparently there is something going on with
your mail that as far as I am concerned answers any questions I had as to
why you ignored my request to leave my personal life out of things. Truce.
I am raising the white flag. Stop. Not necessary to continue the
hostilities. The end.
Sawney Beane
On 27 Sep 1997 09:20:26 GMT, VFL...@prodigy.com (Jon Croft) wrote:
>
>Maybe so, but do not the passive/timid souls among
>us deserve to be heard?
I suppose so... Why don't you ask Chas. Darwin?
>I had never thought of it in those terms, and I see the validity
>of the argument. However, is the discourse between two people,
>no matter how opposed they are in viewpoint, enhanced by schoolyard
>insults?
If one is "arguing" (amusing oneself with) a schoolboy (or someone of
that intellectual level) it can be downright necessary. It is useful,
as well, for inciting the intellectually lame and halt to fury (which
is *always* amusing), and on certain occasions, is just plain
enjoyable for it's own sake. */;~}
>When reading these posts a recurring image came to me. Abraham Lincoln
>stands up and says; "My dear adversary, I respect what you say, but you suck,
>you pathetic wanker!"
*/:~} Hysterical. Of course, an experienced debater such as Aaron
Burr might disagree with you...
>My final point on this: Why would a man who owns a shotgun
>hunt with a rock?
Because sometimes, my good fellow, bashing one's prey's brains
out with a rock is so much more soul-satisfying than simply pulling
a trigger.
>The victim, (me), is so obviously wrong that by just stating the
>facts you have made me feel much worse than by calling me
>a wanker.
That was not my intent at all. Here, I take it back: you were right
the first time, you wanker.
>Designation as a wanker I can argue with,
Oh, no you can't...
>Perhaps we are not that different. In my country, it is
>"kindYgarden", or "relAtor",
Yes, or "jewLery."
>(Americans are more efficient, we use guns instead of knives),
That's what the "hot iron" was all about.
>the commonly accepted pronounciation of a city not far from me
>called "Westminster". This is pronounced by 50 % of the population
>as "WestminIster",
In Scotland, we just call it, "Wankerville."
> PS... What it the hell is a gobshite, and why didn't
> you call me that?
Gob=mouth; shite=excrement. Hence "gobshite."
Because clearly you were more of a cretin than a gobshite. */;~}
Splitting Hairs,
---Sawney Beane
MagaidhS
>I've no idea; but do you know what the difference between a pig and a
>roadie is?
uh oh....no...you're going to have to tell me...my definition of a pig is
my ex-husband
>Probably intimidated.
Maybe.
>
>Not Spanish, but Stallone. As in, "Yo, Mike-ey! What's the haps?"
>Just a "regular guy" reference.
>
>Yo, Late-er!,
You see...this is where that ole dictionary habit causes trouble...I'll
try to break it.
:-)
Yo, Sawney! Right back at ya!
------->Maggie Stewart
Sawney Beane
On 28 Sep 1997 01:17:15 GMT, maga...@aol.com (MagaidhS) wrote:
>
>I'm a stagehand and roadie as well as a lighting designer. How on earth
>did I become more genteel and well-mannered? :-)
I've no idea; but do you know what the difference between a pig and a
roadie is?
>I have. Solomon Paul Sammy.
Probably intimidated.
>>Yo, Magaidh!,
>
>I don't know a lot of Spanish, Sawney, but doesn't "yo" mean "I"?
Not Spanish, but Stallone. As in, "Yo, Mike-ey! What's the haps?"
Just a "regular guy" reference.
Yo, Late-er!,
---Sawney Beane
Micheil Rob Mac Phàdruig
On Sun, 28 Sep 1997 11:35:25 -0400, Win Dunseath <w...@vatis.com>
wrote:
>You should understand the history of Hong Kong first before making such
>comments. 10 years ago the Chinese government wanted England to continue
>control of Hong Kong and because of the infinite wisdom (not) of Margret
>Thatcher, she demanded that England turn control back to China.
I gather you haven't been in touch with anything that could even be
remotely described as "news and opinion from China" for some years.
You may be interested to know that we had to pull out of Shanghai too.
Měcheil Rob MacPhŕdruig
Drůidh:duine-uasal
Héi hó, tha SONAS air m'inntinn...
Jon Croft
>Sawney wrote,
>If one is "arguing" (amusing oneself with) a schoolboy (or someone of
>that intellectual level) it can be downright necessary. It is useful,
>as well, for inciting the intellectually lame and halt to fury (which
>is *always* amusing), and on certain occasions, is just plain
>enjoyable for it's own sake. */;~}
As you said in a previous post, that sort of behaviour in
America generally ends with one lying on an uncomfortably
cold steel table clad with nothing but a tag on one's toe,
and even though this medium provides some protection,
old habits are hard to break.
>Because sometimes, my good fellow, bashing one's prey's brains
>out with a rock is so much more soul-satisfying than simply pulling
>a trigger.
I see this is not just a spectator sport with you,
is it my friend?
>Yes, or "jewLery."
How about "libAry", or, "I found that movie disinteresting."
>That's what the "hot iron" was all about.
I thought you were refering to some 16th century torture
device. Here, unless one has the latest in carbon-fiber
semi-automatic handguns with matching laser targeting
device, one can hardly be considered as properly attired.
(A gun made from iron? Please... Your children
could be burned when you hand it to them to re-load
during freeway gun battles.)
>>the commonly accepted pronounciation of a city not far from me
>>called "Westminster". This is pronounced by 50 % of the population
>>as "WestminIster",
>In Scotland, we just call it, "Wankerville."
Do I detect a note of resentment over England's imperialist
tendencies? ( I noticed they were very gracious in returning
Hong Kong to the Chinese. It's amazing how an opposing army
of 10 million men makes one want to do the *right* thing.
I suspect if Scotland had an army that size, they would
not only grant you full independence, but would give
some serious thought to sprucing up Hadrian's wall....)
Well Sawney, it's been a pleasure. I feel like we have
reached the end of this thread, and I prefer to retire
from the field with my dignity *somewhat* intact.
I will not be posting here any more, as I doubt
an American from Los Angeles has much to offer
this group, but I will be watching as you and your
companions lie in wait for the next intellectually
lame victim to hobble by.
The next time I'm in Scotland, I'll look you up.
I'll just look for the car with a bumper sticker
that says: "Support mental health or I'll kill you."
I imagine that will be you.....
Signing off...
Jon Croft
vfl...@prodigy.com
Sawney Beane
On 28 Sep 1997 08:03:37 GMT, VFL...@prodigy.com (Jon Croft) wrote:
>I will not be posting here any more, as I doubt an American from
>Los Angeles has much to offer this group,
Bollocks. This is a free and open forum for the exchange of opinions,
ideas, and information. You get back here this instant.
>The next time I'm in Scotland, I'll look you up.
You'll have to look *me* up the next time you're in San Francisco,
L.A.-boy. And I *do* have the Blackhawk fitted with a laser-sight...
*/;~}
>I'll just look for the car with a bumper sticker that says:
>"Support mental health or I'll kill you." I imagine that will be you...
Actually mine says, "Honk If You're A Cannibal."
"Chow,"
---Sawney Beane
Win Dunseath
Win Dunseath"...You should understand the history of Hong Kong first
before making such comments. 10 years ago the Chinese government wanted
England to continue control of Hong Kong and because of the infinite
wisdom (not) of Margret Thatcher, she demanded that England turn control
back to China.
Micheil Rob Mac Phàdruig wrote:"....I gather you haven't been in touch
with anything that could even be remotely described as "news and opinion
from China" for some years. You may be interested to know that we had to
pull out of Shanghai too..."
Micheil Rob Mac Phàdruig: I would say that your comment is more than a
little off. I have consulted several key investment managers for two
top investment companies, one of which was Dean Witter. DWR has
participated in several key areas by investing in the building of
factories with a total capitalization of over 1 billion in direct
investment into China. I have review the historical and current news
which would have effected both the direct investment and currency
translation (which there is none). I think with over 40 trips to China
in the last 5 years, I should have some advantage of having the latest
information in this area. Please contain your comments to what your
good at......whatever that is...?
Winfield Dunseath
Solomon Paul Sammy
In article <19970928013...@ladder02.news.aol.com>, maga...@aol.com
(MagaidhS) wrote:
>
> >Which dictionary is that? Proved? Hmm.
>
> Checked three different dictionaries. Tell you what. Show me what
> dictionary you get yours out of and I will acquiesce.
I've already answered that. What dictionaries did you check?
> >If you don't back down, where are all those substansive replies to
> questions
> >directed at you?
>
> Substantive in what way?
Meaning not an attack.
>The questions were perceived as requests
> for
> personal information.
So asking you why you thought my original post to Sawney needed such a
vindictive response, and why you thought it was so wonderful you needed to
add "WELL SAID SAWNEY" is asking a personal question? If not answer it,
now, publically. I can repost the article in question.
>It is as I said. My personal life is private.
And I hope it stays so.
> >"proved your point"! You're wrong!
> >It doesn't matter what your dictionary says about English usage
> 3,000 miles
> >away- in Scotland "spunk" means what I said it means.
> >Everyone who actually *stays* in Scotland and reads s.c.s. knows it!
>
> And everyone I know who actually *stays* in Scotland whether they
> read
> s.c.s or not will agree that it is not used in the correct form when
> used
> *your* way.
?
This would be the ~1 million people you know in Scotland, yes?
Oh, and I can report that no-one I spoke to last night in any of the pubs 'n
clubs I visited took "spunk" to mean anything other than "semen". Even when
put in the context of your sentence they still smirked.
Then again, I don't know as many people in Scotland as you clearly do.
Oh. Perhaps its a generational thing?
> Like I said in another post, check out who else uses your e-mail,
> Paul. I
> received an inordinate amount of mail
I thought you said *four* in an earlier post?
> Now please do me a favor and lighten up. Life is much too short to
> continue to be this angry. I am not angry with you. It's not
> necessary
> for you to be angry with me.
When someone claims in a public forum that I harrass them by email, and I do
not, am I supposed to leap for joy?
BTW Where is your "do not contact me by email" line on your postings to
s.c.s? How are people supposed to *know* that emailing you about a public
article is "unsolicited email"?
> I am raising the white flag. Stop. Not necessary to continue the
> hostilities. The end.
Sounds like backing down to me...
> Always the same,
> Maggie Stewart
Paul
... I am Capacitor of Borg, resistance is irrelavant.
Sawney Beane
On Sun, 28 Sep 1997 15:17:18 BST, Solomon Paul Sammy
<s...@argonet.co.uk> wrote:
>We've met? When?
She has been subjected to your opinions and persona via this newsgroup
and your hate-email. I'd say she knows you well enough. Too well,
probably, for her tastes.
>Is this another outpouring of a fevered mind or perhaps the word "meet" has
>a different meaning on the streets of Scotland than elsewhere?
Let's not talk about your hunt for "meat" on the streets of Glasgow,
shall we? Take it to a.h.p., if you must.
>hmm. Are you trying to imply I'm homosexual?
Did she *say* that? My, my - touchy aren't we?
>Also, don't presume to know about my opinions. I am quite capable of
>forming and expressing my own.
>
>Could they two of you take this mutual-appreciation society to email?
>Absolutely no-one else is interested.
Sorry, old boy: "We're quite capable of forming and expressing our
own [opinions]." Who died and made *you* Ubermeister of s.c.s.?
Actually, you look a bit peaked, old son; must be some "bad meat"
you got `hold of.
>Or at the very least start a new thread and name it appropriately so I can
>avoid it.
Done and done.
Happy To Accommodate,
---Sawney Beane
Steve Graham
MagaidhS wrote:
>
> >I'm confused about the use of the term "Cracker" in reference to me? Is
> >it some kind of American insult, as it's not used that way over here?
>
> Not necessarily. I'm a "cracker" too. Not a term of endearment, either,
> I don't think, but I'm not all that up on it, either.
So what does it mean then?
>
> >There is a song by the Screaming Blue Messiahs called "I can speak
> >American" - this thread reminds me of that.
>
> Huh?
All these American terms being used on a Scottish newsgroup. Actually
the song is pretty funny.
>
> >Actually no - the term "Spunk" is exclusively used to mean "semen" in
> >general Scots use. Again, I know we can't really expect you yo know much
> >about Scotland.
>
> I was the one who used it first, Steve. It would seem that just because I
> used the dictionary version instead of "slang" that I've been chastised
> rather severely. My deepest apologies for my apparent lack of literacy
> here. It will never happen again.
It's not a case of literacy, more a knowledge of things Scottish.
>
> >Regards
>
> I do think you have them.
Of course I do - I'm not at all like Sawnoff Brain, thankfully.
>
> Always the same,
> Maggie Stewart
Regards
Steve Graham
sys...@hotmail.com
http://www.geocities.com/Yosemite/1837/
Steve Graham
MagaidhS wrote:
>
> >Are the Yamaha Clavinovas any good?
>
> Yes they are and a very wise purchase. However, I have to say that my
> heart still belongs to Steinway and would take a good Steinway concert
> grand over ANYTHING else on the market given the choice.
>
Thanks for the advice. Unfortunately concert grand piano's don't fit into
to your average Hong Kong apartment.
> >So it wasn't 'cause you were completely talentless then?
>
> That would be correct.
>
> >Not name dropping - statments of facts only.
>
> I see.
>
> >At least you got the joke....
>
> My ex-husband is no joke, believe me.
>
> >
> >An you called me a snobbish boor!
>
> In what way does becoming an average person by choice make me a snobbish boor?
I think anyone that makes a statement like that has to be a snobbish
boor.
>
> >Once again, "and your point is"?
>
> >In fact, the
> >> point of that whole statement of yours would be lost in the issue of
> >semantics.
> (This was my point.)
>
> >I was referring to clothing actually - all those perverts out there seem
> >to have taken it to mean something different.
>
> I only have your word on that, but I'll take it.
Thanks.
>
> >You're just jealous.
>
> Not at all. Why should I be? I may be 10 years older than you but I look
> much younger and really have no need to be jealous of anyone. :-)
Why do you keep going on about it then?
>
> >From anyone except you and Sawney, actually.
>
> co-dhiu\bh. (Sorry for the lack of the International Keyboard.)
>
> >We only have your word on that.
>
> OK...again I say co-dhiu\bh.
>
> >> Maggie Stewart
> Yep that's me.
Regards (as always)
Steve Graham
Should be Ok now - I just brought him back a nice big Thomas the Tank
Engine from Singapore (the have a Hamleys in the airport there) and he's
playing with that, leaving the blocks to me.
Thanks for the offer.
Regards
Sawney Beane
On Sun, 28 Sep 1997 15:22:13 BST, Solomon Paul Sammy
<s...@argonet.co.uk> wrote:
>
>Troll alert!! Games-a-bogey!
Too late. He responded before you did. */;~}
>But Sawney *isn't* a guttersnipe for using it. Honestly.
Thank you for your defence. Now, back to your little electronic games
and television...
>Paul
>... I am Chakotay of Borg. Tattoos are irrelevant. Your spirit guide will be assimilated as well.
My, you *are* mature, aren't you?
Are you sure your, uh... "talents" wouldn't be better appreciated in
alt.tv.fans.who.haven't.been.layed.since.star.trek.came.on Paul?
Or do your, er... Friends with the great interest in semen at the pubs
which you frequent take care of *that* need as well?
Just Wondering,
---Sawney Beane
Sawney Beane
>If not answer it, now, publically.
Jawohl, mein Fuhrer! <*Not*>
(Or even "publicly," O Wise One? Or, was "publically" another "typo?")
>Oh, and I can report that no-one I spoke to last night in any of the pubs 'n
>clubs I visited
That'd be: "The Dungeon," "Jamie's Backdoor Hideaway," and
"The Weegie Bored," would it not?
>took "spunk" to mean anything other than "semen".
I'll bet.
Still, to help edify you:
spunk, n. [Ir. sponc, tinder,
touchwood, sponge; Gael. sponc
^^^^
< L. spongia, a sponge], 1. a kind of wood or fungus that takes
fire easily; punk; tinder. 2. [British Dial.], a spark or small
^^^^^
flame. 3. [Colloq.], courage; spirit; pluck; mettle. v.i. to flare
^^^^^
up; kindle.
Further, just below it defines "spunkie:"
spunkie, n. [Scot.], 1. the will-o'-the-wisp; marsh fire. 2. liquor.
^^^^
Now, since both "spunk" and "spunkie" are listed as being of Gaelic
and Scots origin, isn't it strange that, for one who bills himself as
being somehow More Of A Scotsman than us puir wee expatriates, you
wouldn't know that?
>Then again, I don't know as many people in Scotland as you clearly do.
Or, at least, as many *literate* people, eh?
>Sounds like backing down to me...
You'd know more about bending over, wouldn't you?
Woof!, Woof! */;~},
---Sawney Beane
MagaidhS
>We've met?
Was just thinking you didn't particularly appreciate my company.
>hmm. Are you trying to imply I'm homosexual?
Not at all. Again, just thinking you didn't particularly appreciate my
company no matter what sort of woman I was.
>Also, don't presume to know about my opinions.
Again, was gathering previous postings what I thought your opinion of me
might be.
>Could they two of you take this mutual-appreciation society to email?
I see you couldn't resist adding your own comments, though.
>Paul (waiting for a deluge of abuse for a reasonable request)
Nope. Like I said. Truce. The end. Done. White flag. Kaput.
>... I am Berman, of Borg. Your NextGen, as it has been, is over
I do enjoy the Borg comments considering I am a great follower of Star Trek.
Peace, Brothah!!!
------->Maggie Stewart
MagaidhS
>>If not answer it, now, publically.
>
>Jawohl, mein Fuhrer! <*Not*>
:-) It's kind of lost its meaning now. A bit pointless to respond, don't
you think? Ah well, it doesn't matter because I am not going to light the
fire on that one again.
>That'd be: "The Dungeon," "Jamie's Backdoor Hideaway," and
>"The Weegie Bored," would it not?
That probably was three of them.
>3. [Colloq.], courage; spirit; pluck; mettle. v.i. to flare
Again, I say that this was the one.
>Or, at least, as many *literate* people, eh?
Well, you know how that goes. You get a degree in literature and you tend
to run into literate people.
>>Sounds like backing down to me...
Not backing down. Just walking away. There is a difference.
>Woof!, Woof! */;~},
:-)
------->Maggie Stewart
MagaidhS
>>Or at the very least start a new thread and name it appropriately so I can
>>avoid it.
>
>Done and done.
>
>
>Happy To Accommodate,
> ---Sawney Beane
Just lead the way, Sawney, old friend....:-)
------->Maggie Stewart
MagaidhS
>Paul
>... I am Chakotay of Borg. Tattoos are irrelevant. Your spirit guide will be
>assimilated as well.
I'm writing these down...:-)
------->Maggie Stewart
Micheil Rob Mac Phàdruig
On Sun, 28 Sep 1997 18:47:42 -0400, Win Dunseath <w...@vatis.com>
wrote:
>Micheil Rob Mac Phŕdruig: I would say that your comment is more than a
>little off. I have consulted several key investment managers for two
>top investment companies, one of which was Dean Witter. DWR has
>participated in several key areas by investing in the building of
>factories with a total capitalization of over 1 billion in direct
>investment into China. I have review the historical and current news
>which would have effected both the direct investment and currency
>translation (which there is none).
Golly gosh!
>I think with over 40 trips to China
>in the last 5 years, I should have some advantage of having the latest
>information in this area. Please contain your comments to what your
>good at......whatever that is...?
Why would you have the latest information? Do you speak any Chinese
language, or do you just accept what you're told as gospel?
I get most of my information from my Great Aunt Elsie in Hong Kong
(years spent working for the government, housing refugees; large
cheerless, but much appreciated concrete blocks) and my special girl
who's a high-ranking Communist official in Shanghai. GA Elsie has a
pretty good nose for what happened and what's happening - she's
retired now, but she didn't leave when the Communists took over
because she's as clean as a whistle in their book and anyway, Hong
Kong is home - and my special girl who still wants me to move to
Shanghai and marry her and whose foreign financial affairs I look
after, just in case things go sour at home... You have no idea, do you
- you're just aother white ghost/foreign devil; full of shit and
self-importance. You couldn't order a glass of tea in any Chinese
language, could you? Spare me the crap; get some time in.
MagaidhS
>Could you provide evidence that my email was "hate-email".
You mean the stuff I deleted from my files?
>You've both called Steve Graham's sexual preferences into
>question.
No I didn't.
>I was expecting a similar attack.
Not from me. I'd never do that.> If you truly like
>and trust Maggie you should at least be able to give her your email.
Whether he does or does not give me his e-mail is his business.
>The cycle is Sawney posts
>rubbish. I point out rubbish. Sawney makes personal attack.
Oops...
>You act like the retarded love child of a moron and an
>imbecile.
That's sort of like me being the love child of Oscar Wilde, right?
>If you wish to continue to flame me instead of engaging me in rational
>debate, feel free. I'm now posting from home and have more than the 3
>minutes I usually need to dispense with the crap you write. You will lose
>any flame war you start.
You know, I thought this was the thread where you didn't download or
whatever. You knew it was Sawney. You said you didn't want to deal with
his stuff any more. And you responded to it anyway. I don't understand.
You asked for a thread that you knew was his so you could ignore him. And
here you are. I am very impressed with the lengths you went to respond,
too. Completely and totally impressed.
>Maggie Stewart, please take *public* steps to distance yourself from this.
Hey, I'll do what I need to do when I need to do it. But thank you for
your advice.
Always the same, you can't make me change unless I want to,
Maggie Stewart
Sawney Beane
>both the direct investment and currency translation (which there is none).
Hmmm, I think this snippet from Associated Press
sums it up pretty well:
"For Hong Kong's 6.3 million people, the biggest question
was still unanswered: Can a free capitalist society survive
in the embrace of a Communist power, even one that has
promised to keep Hong Kong politically and economically
free?
The initial signs seemed mildly encouraging.
At dawn, the Chinese army poured in 4,000 troops in long
convoys of trucks, jeeps, buses and armored personnel
carriers."
Oh, yes, granted: the story *does* go on to say that no one was
*actually_shot*; but then again, So What? If the only way in which
China can maintain it's rule over the people who actually have to live
there is with troops, APCs, and gunboats (four of which now keep watch
over Hong Kong's harbour), then what does it really matter that
"business as usual" is the order of the day?
I see them as no different than the Evil Empire in maintaining it's
shameful presence in Northern Ireland. Both are interfering with
the right of a people to their own Self-Determination.
Further, there's this: if the positions of "Britain" (England) and
China had been reversed (with China holding an expired lease
on a "British" territory), do you seriously think for a moment that
they would have just voluntarily handed it over to Tony Blair?
Back To Reality,
---Sawney Beane
georgette
Jon Croft wrote:
> Sawney....
> Thanks for your * friendly* reply to my post seeking
> help on a possible trip to Scotland for New Years eve
> 1999\2000. Maybe I should not have posted this question
> here as it seems to be a rather serious group, but
> the level of boorish sniping over something as
> mundane as to when to have a party seems rather absurd.
> I am not angry at you or the other posters, just a little
> disappointed. This kind of response to a genuine appeal for
> help, particularly one that crosses cultrural boundries,
> is exactly why so many people do not participate in these
> groups. I have a thick skin and I found being called
> a "putty-headed, bollock-brained, cretin" amusing,
> as no one has ever risen to such levels of poetry
> to insult me before. But to many people, the threat
> of this kind of taunting prevents them from posting,
> which limits the discussion to those who are arrogant
> or insensitive enough not to care. I do not understand
> why polite people who would never dream of being
> rude to a stranger asking directions seem to have no
> qualms about being unkind to someone asking the same question
> via electronic means. I am, as you appear to be, an educated
> person and could take the same tone with your post.
> Lets see how it would read......
Jon, you are welcome to my house in Oban on
both new years eves to take care of all
inconsistencies in calendars.
Additionally, you have to understand that
"Sawney Bean" is actually Michael Paterson,
an old curmudgeon (sp?) who has too much
time on his hands and is somewhat filled with
a great deal of hostility. Please note that
the "both" of them, who are known for their
abusiveness and lack of consideration in their
posts, NEVER ATTACK EACHOTHER. Very telling,
that. Michael actually is quite a brilliant
and thoughtful person who is just quite not
well.
Of course, by making this post, Lynnette will
again try to get me off this newsgroup. Oh, well.
georgette
.______________________________________________________________________.
|Georgette Champagne - Principal Engineer | | | | | | | |
| Alpha CAD Physical Analysis | d | i | g | i | t | a | l |
|__________________________________________|___|___|___|___|___|___|___|
"What somebody says about me says a whole lot more about them than it
does me."
Sawney Beane
On Mon, 29 Sep 1997 03:33:24 BST, Solomon Paul Sammy
<s...@argonet.co.uk> wrote:
<*Woof*!>
A few brief points:
1.) I wonder if you can possibly appreciate how very much I enjoy
watching you jump?
2.) It never takes me more than 3 min. to respond to one of your
posts; it may well take 3 days for it to show up at my server.
3.) Where can I purchase the plaid spray-paint?
4.) Please send the bushel of hash to:
Sawney Beane
c/o Expat Cannibal Society
1 Market Plaza
S.F., CA, USA 94107
5.) The one on top of your head.
ANAGAAWTABW,
---Sawney Beane
Ian Johnston
Michael Wade (cel...@mwade.demon.co.uk) wrote:
: No Scots in Hong Kong, Sawney?
Where did Jardine and Matheson come from?
Ian
Jon Croft
>Jon Croft wrote:".....Do I detect a note of resentment over England's
>imperialist tendencies? ( I noticed they were very gracious in
returning
>Hong Kong to the Chinese. It's amazing how an opposing army of 10
>million men makes one want to do the *right* thing. I suspect if
>Scotland had an army that size, they would not only grant you full
>independence, but would give some serious thought to sprucing up
>Hadrian's wall....)
Win Dunseath Wrote:
:You should understand the history of Hong Kong first before making such
:comments. 10 years ago the Chinese government wanted England to
continue
:control of Hong Kong and because of the infinite wisdom (not) of
Margret
:Thatcher, she demanded that England turn control back to China. It
wasnt
:until the last 4-5 years did the Chinese's patriotic momentum increase.
I'll admit I'm not an expert on English-Chinese relations,
but given England's reluctance to give up control of *anything*,
I assumed they had good reason for giving up control
of one of the most dynamic areas in the Pacific rim.
Win Dunseath also wrote:
:Your comment about having 10 million men in the chinese army wasnt an
:issue. The Chinese never demanded or illuded to that they would
:"re-gain" possession by military force.
I believe you miss the point in *having* a 10 million man
army. You don't demand anything. You *suggest* an outcome
that would be in your best interest, and see if the other
side gets the hint.
I imagine the negotiations went something like this:
Margaret: Mr. Premier, Great Britain has a long history in
Hong Kong with a great deal of investment, and we are adamant
in our intent to retain control of this vital area.
Any attempt by your country to interfere with Great Britain's
interest's will be met with the strongest possible reaction.
I hope I have made myself clear.
Deng: Prime Minister Thatcher, you misunderstand me. We don't
really want Hong Kong back, and would never *dream* of interfering
with your nation's interests. It's just that we have this
10 million man army, and are running out of places to house them
all, so we thought we could put a few divisions in Hong Kong
until we finish some new barracks for them. We don't want
to be difficult about this, so of course the decision
is completely yours.
Margaret: Really... 10 Million men? Thats a lot of men to
find shelter for. You know, when relatives come to visit
me, #10 seems so small that I can surely sympathize with
your plight. Well, I wouldn't want it to be said that a Prime
Minister of Great Britain was responsible for that many men
going homeless, so I think we might leave around... July,1997?
Is that allright or should we go sooner?
Deng: No, that will be fine, and don't worry, you still
have the Falklands, and I hear the price of wool is
going up.
(A Chinese aide walks in with a telephone....)
Aide: Mr. Premier. There is a gentleman on the phone from
some group called "Sinn Fein". His accent is a little hard to
understand, and he seems rather excitable, but he wants to
talk to you. Something about an alliance with us.
And oh yes, he said you should link a British pull-out
of Hong Kong with a similar pull-out of Northern Ireland.
Will you speak with him?
Deng: I don't know, what do you think, Mrs. Prime Minister?
Margaret: (Laughs nervously).
I really don't think that is a good idea.
Probably just a prank call, you know how silly
the Irish can be. Well, I really must be running
along as my plane is on a meter, and I'm all
out of coins. Let's just forget I brought it up, shall
we? And if you're ever in England, I'll show you
around Buckingham palace. Maybe I can even persuade
the Queen to remove her gloves when she greets you.
(Cut to question and answer session in the House of Commons).
Labour leader: Prime Minister; maybe you can explain
why you gave away Great Britain's richest overseas
interest without so much as a whimper.
Margaret: I would remind the right honourable gentleman
of the words of the great Scottish statesman Sawney Beane:
"Piss off, you pathetic little cretinous, pimply-bummed,
smarmy wanker!"
Again, I could be wrong, but it makes
for a ripping good yarn.
Back with reservations,
Jon Croft
vfl...@prodigy.com
Paul Sammy
>>> Or at the very least start a new thread and name it appropriately so I can
>>> avoid it.
>> Done and done.
>> ---Sawney Beane
> Just lead the way, Sawney, old friend....:-)
>---> Maggie Stewart
Ah. So much for the truce, eh?
Paul
--
World Shotokan Dojo List : www.argonet.co.uk/users/sps/Karate/
PlayStation Technical FAQ: www.argonet.co.uk/users/sps/psxfaq/
A sufficiently vitriolic political argument is *still* bollocks.
Paul Sammy
>> We've met?
> Was just thinking you didn't particularly appreciate my company.
I've never been in your company!
>> hmm. Are you trying to imply I'm homosexual?
> Not at all. Again, just thinking you didn't particularly appreciate my
> company no matter what sort of woman I was.
Ah, sense. I bet it doesn't stop you hopping on the Sawney Beane
Express Bandwagon on the Paul's A Poof threads.
>> Also, don't presume to know about my opinions.
> Again, was gathering previous postings what I thought your opinion of me
> might be.
My opinions of you is unlikely to be what you expect.
>> Could they two of you take this mutual-appreciation society to email?
> I see you couldn't resist adding your own comments, though.
I only commented on points related to me. I *requested* that you take
the personal stuff elsewhere.
>> Paul (waiting for a deluge of abuse for a reasonable request)
> Nope. Like I said. Truce. The end. Done. White flag. Kaput.
No, not "nope", look at the rational response of the other half of the
Dynamic Duo. He's started *three* threads all aimed at getting my
goat. I'm glad to kept the above line in; I can now point out the
sheer predictibility of SB. If you truly wish a truce you wouldn't
post to them, eh? Lets see...
>> ... I am Berman, of Borg. Your NextGen, as it has been, is over
> I do enjoy the Borg comments considering I am a great follower of Star Trek.
Ah, so you'll be immature too then. Another label tagged on me by the
High Priest of Maturity.
> Peace, Brothah!!!
That remains to be seen.
Micheil Rob Mac Phàdruig
On 29 Sep 1997 08:53:37 GMT, VFL...@prodigy.com (Jon Croft) wrote:
>Again, I could be wrong, but it makes
>for a ripping good yarn.
>
It rings eerily true, I rather think...
Sawney Beane
On 29 Sep 1997 06:07:27 GMT, maga...@aol.com (MagaidhS) wrote:
>
>You know, I thought this was the thread where you didn't download or
>whatever. You knew it was Sawney. You said you didn't want to deal with
>his stuff any more. And you responded to it anyway. I don't understand.
Shhhhh... Neither does he... */;~}
>You asked for a thread that you knew was his so you could ignore him. And
>here you are. I am very impressed with the lengths you went to respond,
>too. Completely and totally impressed.
So am I. And every time he does, he propagates it yet further.
I always suspected that he was both a self-abuser and an idiot.
See You Back Here Tomorrow (No Doubt),
---Sawney Beane
Sawney Beane
On 28 Sep 1997 16:40:17 GMT, maga...@aol.com (MagaidhS) wrote:
>>I've no idea; but do you know what the difference between a pig and a
>>roadie is?
>
>uh oh....no...you're going to have to tell me...
Well... Since you *insist*...
(I heard this from a roadie [for "Heart"]):
Q: What's the difference between a pig and a roadie?
A: A pig won't stay up until 3:00 in the morning trying to make it
with a roadie.
*/:~}
>Yo, Sawney! Right back at ya!
Whatevah,
---Sawney Beane
Solomon Paul Sammy
In article <3431e09a...@news.pacbell.net>, Hav...@Nice.Snack (Sawney
Beane) wrote:
>
> On 28 Sep 1997 08:03:37 GMT, VFL...@prodigy.com (Jon Croft) wrote:
>
> >I will not be posting here any more, as I doubt an American from
> >Los Angeles has much to offer this group,
> Bollocks. This is a free and open forum for the exchange of
> opinions,
> ideas, and information. You get back here this instant.
Yes, I agree. As long as you're open and honest about your connection with
Scotland, then I'm sure we'll all learn lots from each other.
Paul
... I am Chekov of Borg: you vill be asseemilated. Reesiztance eez futile.
MagaidhS
>
>Q: What's the difference between a pig and a roadie?
>A: A pig won't stay up until 3:00 in the morning trying to make it
> with a roadie.
Ummmm...I'd say maybe that's not true. Sometimes I equate punters with
pigs. And let us not forget about the ex. :-) Roadie for Heart? You'll
have to tell me who it was sometime. I probably know them. :-)
>Whatevah,
As if!
------->Maggie Stewart
Solomon Paul Sammy
In article <3440f935...@news.pacbell.net>, Hav...@Nice.Snack (Sawney
Beane) wrote:
> (Or even "publicly," O Wise One? Or, was "publically" another
> "typo?")
No, it was a spelling mistake. Sue me.
> >Oh, and I can report that no-one I spoke to last night in any of the
> pubs 'n
> >clubs I visited
>
> That'd be: "The Dungeon," "Jamie's Backdoor Hideaway," and
> "The Weegie Bored," would it not?
Nope. Been a while since you've been here, eh?
[dictionary def. cut]
For the hard of thinking, let me repeat. Whatever your American-English
dictionaries may say, you are wrong. Which bit of my previous reply did you
not understand? Is repeating an error supposed to improve its validity?
> Now, since both "spunk" and "spunkie" are listed as being of Gaelic
> and Scots origin, isn't it strange that, for one who bills himself as
> being somehow More Of A Scotsman than us puir wee expatriates, you
> wouldn't know that?
You're making things up again. Show me the attribution where I bill myself
as such. (Bet you cut this bit out, like you do all the other bits you
haven't a clue about how to refute).
Why should I care about the etymology of the word? Is this is same person
who complained about the English forcing their culture on Scotland? You're
not suggesting that your _foreign_ defination better than what the people of
Scotland use are you?
You'll cut that bit out too- too much hard work to refute that too.
> You'd know more about bending over, wouldn't you?
> Woof!, Woof! */;~},
Please, pick one running gag at a time, my sides can't cope with your wit.
> ---Sawney Beane